Joe Rogan: Trump Would Destroy Joe Biden in a Fight

A lot of that stuff, it seems like everything works out too much like it's scripted. Yeah. Like during Trump's campaign, I kept saying, he's got to win. I go, this doesn't play if he doesn't win. This isn't Rocky 1. This has to be Rocky 2. He's got to fucking win. It's not about the battle and the bravery and that he's got to win this for this to work. To really highlight the theater of the absurd. Right, right. He's got to win. Yes. He's got to win. Spotlights in the air. This isn't the theater of the absurd. I mean, that guy being president with his fake hair sprayed down and orange skin with the white around the eyes, it all seems so fake. Everything he says, the way he looks, like yeah, everything is insane. I still, every time I see him walking down the stairs at Air Force One, I'm just like, holy fuck, Donald Trump is the president? Like what kind of wacky world? A really wacky world. A really wacky world. The other day- Undeniably wacky world. When he was giving that speech about Elvis and it's just like, people told me I look like Elvis. That's it. People have told me if I wasn't blonde, I looked like Elvis. And it's like no one told you that. Even a little bit like Elvis. No one ever told you that. Oh, your belly. Right when Elvis was sitting on the ball for the last time, but that's about it. How about when that reporter confronted him? Look at the two of them together. Come on. Well, when I look at that picture- People told me, I look like the king. Maybe. Oh my God. Maybe a little bit. How about the upper right hand corner one? Have you ever seen anyone- Go in a trap. Anyone- You can't walk out. That fat Elvis is my favorite. Fat Elvis. Because I love you too much, baby. Of course, a thousand memes now. Yeah. Have you ever seen someone so committed to a comb-over for so many years? Like, so committed. But it's not just a comb-over. It's, I don't know what it is. It's a wacky contraption. Walking up the stairs of Air Force One where the wind's blowing from behind, you see the whole back of his head is bald. You're like, where's the hair coming from? It was like a fucking Vader's head without the helmet. It kind of looked like that weird, like what's going on? You never know where it's starting and where it ends and how long it is. It's like- Chaos. Look at that. Oh my God. That's just a picture. The video is more disturbing because you see the flaps. It's just chaos. Yeah, yeah. Well, how about he didn't want to go out there for the Fourth of July memorial because he didn't want to get his hair wet? His hair wet in the rain? Yeah, that's what they were saying. What? I don't know. That is such a weird thing. Like he- It was September 11th. That's what it was. The President. The 9-11 one? Oh, it was the Veterans Memorial Day. Oh, it was the Veterans Day? Yeah. It was the Memorial Day. Memorial Day. The President is a guy that's so insecure. Yeah. That forever, for decades, he has to fucking do a fucking Dairy Queen ice cream fucking move on his head every day. Also, he's fat. The thing is, if you're really concerned so much about your looks, why are you fat? Why are you fat? I don't think he thinks he's fat. I think he's one of those guys that you talked about having a- Body dysmorphia. Body dysmorphia. He looks in the mirror and sees Elvis, like young leather-clad Elvis. Yeah, he's got this weird thing where he doesn't believe in exercise because he feels like the body is like a battery. If you put any energy into exercise- It's going to wear it out. Well, the motherfucker is up at all hours. Yeah. During the campaign for the midterms, he was doing three rallies a day flying all over the country, and he never seemed to be like he was falling asleep or losing energy. So I don't know what he's doing. Well, do you know about all that? He says, I get exercise. I mean, I walk. I this, I that. Trump, 71, said during the Oval Office, I run over to a building next door. I get more exercise than people think. I run over to a building next- I'm amazing. My exercise is incredible. He's on, allegedly, according to one reporter, he's on diet pills, and he's been on diet pills forever. And then there's a prescription that they, I mean, he actually even cited the exact Dwayne Reed Pharmacy where he was supposed to take this for like a little while and he wound up taking it for years. He's taken some form of amphetamines. Oh, good for him. In this day and age, you would be fucking stunned if you found out how many journalists, how many people who are writers, how many people that are professionals, how many people that work who are on Adderall. The community that I'm in, I mean, I live in an area where there's a lot of people that have money and they work real hard. And because of the fact that they need energy, I know a shitload of people that have taken Adderall. Folks that are in Hollywood, folks that are in finance, all sorts of different- Yeah, I know quite a few also. It's everywhere, man. I mean, it is such a, you know, the difference between methamphetamine and amphetamines, the difference between meth and what you're getting when you get Adderall is so goddamn close. Yeah. It's so close. But meth is crazy. You take that and you're a fucking, you're a meth head. The only difference is how quick it hits you. It's literally the only difference. And then the dosage that you get is obviously regulated if you get Adderall. Right, right. I don't know. I'm not a pill guy. I never have been. What do you got here, Jamie? What are you pulling up? What he says here about being on a treadmill and going on diet. I was on a treadmill for the first time, actually in quite a while, and it was a very steep angle and I was there for a very long time, he said. They were surprised. And they said, well, you can stop now. That's amazing. And I said, I can go much longer than this if you want me to. Hey, Trump, I got a fucking right now, buddy. I got a challenge. How about you join the sober October fitness challenge? Oh, man. Hop on. We'll put that strap on you. We'll see what's up. See who's amazed. A lot of Mickey Mantle jeans. Everything is over the top with Trump. It's so good. Trump said he had dieted successfully before. I have been more of a believer in diet because I'm strong, you know. I've always been more of a believer in diet because I'm strong, you know. I hit the ball far. I mean, I'm strong physically, he said. That is so hilarious. Will you imagine wrestling him how weak he must feel? Like just a bag of Jell-O. Just grab a hold of his body and smoosh it. It's all gushy. The bones are barely held together with thread. Like, what are you talking about? You're strong. You hit the ball far. I'm strong. I mean, when he said that he would beat up Joe Biden, that was like a peak ludicrousness. Yeah, yeah. I was like, what? You're going to beat up Joe Biden would go down fast and hard. That's what he said. Dude, the fact that they are talking like that, again, absurd. It's so fucking funny that and Biden has said the same thing. Like he. I'll kick his ass. He's a bully. Like when did Truman and Dewey trade barbs like that back in the day? What is he saying? Nixon and Kennedy. I didn't make a mistake, but they asked me would I like to debate this gentleman. And I said, no. I said, if we're in high school, I'd take you behind the gym and beat the hell out of them. Oh, violence. Meanwhile, I don't believe that I think Trump would kick his ass. I really do. I think Trump is meaner and I think Biden would make a mistake. Yeah, Trump better be able to. He would swing and he would slip and he would fall and he'd fuck his knee up and Trump would kick him in the face like a soccer ball. He would get lucky and he would walk away and Biden would be holding his teeth and blood coming out of his mouth and he'd be like, I told you in the best, the best ever.