Doug Stanhope's DMT Experience

The best thing is to get into this state. We could just be Doug Stanhope. And I go, Doug Stanhope, you're on. And just push you onto the stage. And to get me into that state, I have to know what time I should not be shit-faced like I was last night. No, no, no, no, no. Don't take 50 milligrams. Cheers. Come on. Take 175. Don't take 50 milligrams and then have Joe Rogan go, show starts now. Let's do mushrooms. Let's do mushrooms. Let's do the show on... Oh, I'm scared of them. You need to. That's the point. Come on, Douglas. How long has it been? Yesterday? I did do... For me? I'm doing them all the time. All right. Small mouths. I like it. Exactly. I don't want to even say her name, but yeah, Carmen Morales. What? Yeah, she came out. She was... What's her name? Don't say her name. She's a comic. Don't... Listen to me. If you don't want to say her name, don't say her name. Let's call her... She would want her name to be said. No. She wasn't dealing drugs. She's giving you drugs. Yeah. Don't. You've given me drugs. Shh. Don't tell these fucking people. Can you black out the Joe Rogan experience and just say the experience? Doug Stanhope. Allegedly. Doug Stanhope, when the first time he and I did DMT, I was worried. I lost him. I was really genuinely worried. Oh my goodness. You were gone. Oh my goodness. You had gone like... Like this snoring thing where I was like, do I lift him up so that he doesn't swallow his fucking tongue? I was like, oh my God, if I kill Doug, if the man show dies, because I give Doug DMT... It was dying, by the way. We knew we were writing the last monologues ever. And that's what fucked me up. We've told this story every time, I'm sure, on your podcast. But we were at your house writing... We know this is the last of the monologues and they're fucking just pap dredge fucking awful. What's up guys? It wasn't that bad. By the end, when we know it's fucking over and we're beaten. Yeah. Well, there was some... Last time you want to smoke DMT. My first time, like, all right, this sucks and we're just getting through this. And then you want to smoke DMT. And then I go fucking into alternate realities. And then I come out of it 10 minutes later saying, I remember, I came out of it just saying, oh my goodness, oh my goodness, oh my goodness. Because I've just learned the fucking... You know what else you said? You said, you've already seen this. You said that to me, oh, you've already seen this. You've already seen this. I swear the picture of fucking Bill Hicks on your wall winked at me. And when I said that to you... The one with him lighting the American flag with a cigarette. Lighting the cigarette with the American flag. I came out of it and I looked and I swear Bill Hicks fucking winked at me. When I said that to you, you went, oh, fucking... Looked at me like cliche. But I swear that happened. No. I'm not even that big a Bill Hicks fan. You were just insecure because you had experienced death and you came back. When I would go outside to smoke cigarettes from the writer's room on the lot after that for a week, I couldn't make direct eye contact with the giant dumpster-sized electrical generator because I thought I could make it blow up with my mind. The wiring in my head was so... I've never done it since. People try to drop that off at the merch booth. We should do it tonight. Never again. We should do it tonight. Fuck no. Yeah, come on. When I'm about to... You're okay. When I'm gonna quit smoking cigarettes, yeah, that would be... You're better now because of that day. I don't know. Yeah, you are. You know why? Because you know that that's possible. You didn't know that that was possible. But it's hard to break up, okay, I'm gonna write a bit about this that now I know is dog shit and means nothing because I've been through that experience. Where you go, this is all so fucking... Life is so silly, but you still have to make a living by... But Doug, just express that. You don't have... I've been doing that. I know you have, but don't worry about that. It doesn't have to be dog shit and silly. You don't think about that. Think about you. Think about if you were some 24-year-old guy working in a fucking newspaper distributor office. You had a bullshit job and you're allowed to listen to podcasts. You listen to you talk about your experience. Don't worry about your own fucking weirdness in handling it. Worry about what it is. What it is is you died and came back. You really felt like you died and came back. When you came back, you said to me... You said to me... Here, say your honor. This is what you said. You said, life eats life. You said, life just eats life. Life eats life. Life eats life. This is what you said. When you were coming out, you were like, life just eats life. Life just eats life. It just keeps going. It keeps going. Life eats life. Life eats life. I'm just trying to hang on. Life eats life. It's like, you've already been there. You've already been here. You've already been here. Ultimately. And you're like, you took me to this place. You've already been there. I'll never forget that because I thought you were going to die. I was like, God damn it. Nobody's ever died from this shit. Like if Doug's the first guy to die, maybe I overestimated the RPMs at his fucking engine handle and redlined. But you got through it. That was the thing you kept saying, life eats life. Life eats life. Life eats life. Life eats life. The dichotomy of having to go from that supernatural experience in 10 minutes and then go back to, oh wait, now we really have to try it, finishing up these dumb monologues. Yeah, but that's okay too. That's okay too because that's a unique challenge. That's like some weird thing we're doing. Like, what are we doing?