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Shane Gillis is the co-host of "Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast" with Matt McCusker and one half of the sketch comedy duo "Gilly and Keeves" with John McKeever. Watch his new comedy series, "Tires," and special, "Beautiful Dogs" on Netflix.www.shanemgillis.com
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Anyway, let's take a look at this shit hoarder. Mmm. You ready? Am I ready? No one's ready. Never? I'm the only one I think who thinks this is hilarious. Okay. How will we blur this out? I'm not just gonna, I'm just gonna not show it, because it's known as like the worst story on earth. Yeah, don't show it. Don't show it. Don't show it. Just show Shane's face. Just ladies, uh, stick. Show your reactions. Shit in bottles. Oh boy. For a decade. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. That's her? Who's the best part? Is that her? That's the lady? Oh my God. There's shit everywhere. She. Oh my God. That's her shit bucket. Yo. Yo, wait. Watch, watch, watch, watch, watch. Watch. That's her shit bucket. And then she's like, sometimes it gets too heavy, so I have to transfer buckets. Rice, bro. I can't do this. I can't do this. I can't do this. Oh my God, dude. Shut the fuck up. She lives in a shit house. Look at that. Full shit house. That's so insane. Look at that shit everywhere, dude. Oh my God. I'm going to throw up. Look at that shit bucket. I can't look. Bro, look. You have to look. Look at her eating soup, dude. She's eating rice. She's eating rice. So soup. On a pile of shit. What the fuck, man? So there's the interview here. She goes, she goes, I can't be the worst hoarder you've ever seen. I can't be the worst hoarder you've ever seen. I can't be the worst hoarder you've ever seen. Look at this sign. It says, I am okay. What are you... This is the man who has something to do with smell. Yeah, this is the problem when you let kids think that they're okay. I guess so, because I thought it was due to the mold and dust. You have to tell me this, because I... You don't have... I mean, some people would argue, how do you not know that feces in the house is bad? But wait, I don't smell it anymore. It's extremely dangerous out here. Okay, stop, stop, stop, stop. I will fucking throw up. Dude, she's so... I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. I'm not gonna throw up. Well, that's news to me. Imagine if this was fake and then they conned us. And that's like chocolate milk and toilet paper. They didn't fake this. You can tell this lady's gone. Maybe she's like a really good actress. I used to put poop in a jug. Okay. Okay. Dude, so at the very end, this is the best part. So at the very end, they're like, we're gonna have to, we gotta go in there and clear out all the stuff in there. So all her food's contaminated. She doesn't have her refrigerator. She just has bread on the ground that's covered in mold. At one point, they're like, you can't eat that moldy bread. She's like, I'm gonna take the fucking mold off, obviously. They're like, all right. At the very end, they're like, shit everywhere, dude. What do you think her digestive tract is like? She's eating progressive soup, dude. With shit in it. She's eating ultimate soup. Because you get a certain amount of shit on your hands. And you go bottles, dude. Yeah. You know when they swab things, they find human fecal matter on things all the time, like doorknobs and stuff. So if you eat a chip after you touch a doorknob, there's some fecal matter probably that gets in there. This lady's eating, all right. So at the very end, they're like, we gotta go in there. And she's like, hold on. Let me get one more night. I'm gonna go ahead back in there and eat some contaminated food. And then she goes, and then the party's over. They're like, you think it's a party to eat contaminated food? She's like, what do you guys fucking care? I've been in there eating poop for 12 years. They're like, what the fuck? Hold on, when you get to that part at the very end, the dude, she says it. She goes, what do you care? I've been eating poop for 12 years. As soon as he says it, he goes, oh. Just watching a dude get defeated by a lady. I'm trying to explain this properly. The music, they play dramatic music. She goes, what do you guys fucking care? And he goes, he looks at her and she goes, I've been in there eating poop for 12 years. And he goes, oh. She takes the guy's soul, dude. Hold on, shit. It's right, it's towards the very end. They're giving her basically the intervention. It's two people outside. It's a lady and a guy. Imagine your brain. Yes, yes, yes. I'm gonna go ahead back in there. Clodge. It's gonna be hard, but I'm gonna give up some stuff. This guy. And I'm going to go ahead and eat some of the contaminated food and then the party's over. Because I have to get it. Because when somebody goes on intervention, they want to get high one last time. The party ends for me tomorrow. How is eating contaminated food a party? Why the fuck does it matter? I've been eating poop for 12 years. See, no one else thinks it's funny. Dude, dude. No one else thinks it's funny. I'm questioning Alex Baker not gonna ask. No one else thinks it's funny. So beyond dude. Dude. I don't think it's fake. But I've been fooled before. True. That's how it works. It seems like if you're, unless she's wearing prosthetics, it seems like she's suffering the effects of her poor diet. Like the inflammation in her face from poop eating. At the end, dude. At the end they bulldozed the house and put her in an assisted living home. It sounded like a happy ending of hoarders. It said the house was beyond contaminated. The city had to get involved and destroy the land. It's assault the earth. That's so insane. It's pretty fun though. Just a lady and her mom shitting in a bucket. Before that, what was the worst one? The lady who eats toilet paper? Remember that lady? Did you ever see the lady who eats toilet paper? That was my sick addiction or whatever. Was that what it was? It's one of those. I didn't even, I never even watched it. I watched this hoarders, I never watched hoarders. Yeah, she was just chewing up toilet paper and she said it was addictive. No, there was a lady, the second worst hoarders is a lady who had like 90 dead cats in her house. Oh god. And she was saving them. She was putting them in the fridge. She was like, I don't want to say goodbye to these guys. Oh my god. She takes them out for the camera. Their eyes are deteriorated. She's got a dick. It's so fucking funny. Oh no, don't show me this. Come on man. Oh, rat collection. Dude, rat collection. Watch this guy at the beginning. He goes, oh boy. He's like, yeah, people try to talk about it, but until you tried it for yourself or something like that. What? Don't knock it till you try it. He has a million rats. What the fuck? Whoa. Well, you know there's like a temple in India where rats are. Have you ever see that rat temple in India? No. Oh dude, this is wild. So this is a temple in India and these rats all hang out with everyone. They eat with you. They like leave the rats. They put milk out for them. The rats are all drinking milk. They all like share. Yeah. It's the weirdest thing. It's like a temple filled with rats. So as these people are all praying, like dude, rats are everywhere. Everywhere. So they're not treated poorly. Well, they got this wrong. But it's really weird, man, because this is like, look, the rats just like eat their food and it's this beautiful temple. Let's see what this guy does. He got to have an explanation. No. He's here. Let's see what he says. When they die, they're born as rats. When a rat dies, it's born as us humans. That might seem preposterous to many in the West. So they're just chilling. People here. They think that they died and become a rat. Yeah. But they've managed to create an environment where they live with rats. Yeah. Well, there's going to be a new fucking plague if these guys keep doing this. Or not. They better knock it off. Seems like it's working fine. Maybe that's how you avoid a plague. I bet these dudes get viciously ill constantly. Imagine the diary they get. Bro, Indian food and rat shit. You hate rats all day. They're shitting all over the place. That's the thing. It's like, oh, it's peaceful. No, it's rat shit. No, yeah. You 100% get rat shit everywhere. But what if they're right, dude? What if you and me wake up rat? You're a rat, dude. Why does... Thankfully, some guy's giving you milk.