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Ms. Pat is a stand-up comic, host of “The Patdown” podcast, and star of the BET+ series “The Ms. Pat Show.” Her most recent special, “Y’all Wanna Hear Something Crazy?”, is streaming on Netflix. www.mspatcomedy.com
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You Something had a meme they put up on the Instagram the other day of how every dude whose girlfriend is paying for everything Stands and it's like a guy standing with his arm deep around the girl like they're waiting in line for things baby In public always baby holding my hand you can't get my husband hold my hand. You know, why couldn't you pay the mortgage? My husband funny as fuck And so I said, hey, I said, uh, baby, you want some pussy? He said, not at all. Oh my god. He said, not at all, Joe. We bought a sleep number bed. And he was like, because his knee was messed up. I said, I'm going to buy this sleep number bed. I'm going to put it out every night. I'm like, fuck yeah. So I had just got to deal with Fox for my TV show. So I walk in there. I walk in the damn sleep number like a real nigga roll when they get some money. Give me the best fucking bed you want because I'm going to fuck every night. There's so many $13,000 sleep number bed, but I should have known he wasn't going to do shit because he was his sister on getting a metric that split down the middle. You know, the two matches are separate. That shit split down the middle. And now every time I want to say, I got to tell you, hey, you want to come to American gets bus. Come to America. Got the harder side. He know he's like, fuck with you on that mattress too soft on out. Come on. And then that we don't gave up. We just fuck in the middle. And by the time we get through the fucking mattress, I fell off the bed because we in the middle of the whole lab. And every time just chips and shit just the remote my wig. As soon as I get my TV show on by me, a magic putters back the fucking gal.