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Theo Von is a stand-up comic and podcaster. He is the host of "This Past Weekend with Theo Von." www.theovon.com
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We saw a dude in Albuquerque with a sword, man, late at night. Take a hit. Give me a hit. Damn, dude. Take a hit. Are we in my struggling that bad today? No, no, you're not struggling at all. Is that a new one? That nicotine really got me. Is that a new one, Jamie? You opened up a new one? No, it's the same. But it has the label on it. The other turn, the other turn. That's how strong this shit is. It puts the label back on itself. Yeah, it seals, re-seals. Ready? Oh, I can already feel it. All right. Jesus. It was so bad. It's so bad when it's done. Bro, I'm not joking, bro. I'm not joking, dude. It's so sharp, right? It's so sharp. Yes, I feel like, Jamie, you want some of this? Nope. You sure? What was that? What was the last time you had some? Feel great. What was the last time you had some? Leave them alone, Jamie. Come on, give me a little hit. I don't need it. Come on, a little bit from me. I could have fake it. It'll help you lift weights, Jamie. I already did today. I feel like a sword just came on me. A sword. It feels insane. Oh my god. Yeah, put a lid on that, please. Oh. You're going to take another one? Oh my god, you're an animal. I'd like to ride the fucking dark on me. Does it get better a second time around? It gets a little more manageable. Oh my god. I feel like they're moving furniture in my fucking DNA, baby. Yeah, that is not good. Dude, yeah, you got to have Bobby Kennedy on, man. He's an interesting dude. How did you meet him? I met him just through like this. I met him through just some other friends. Yeah. And he just is just an interesting guy. He's just so smart. And he works with the environment, you know? So his whole life has been about taking care of the environment. Yeah, he was in environmental oil. You're crying. Are you emotional, or are you just freaking out because of the smelling salts? I mean, I can get emotional sometimes, but I think the salt's about me. That thing made my heart slower. It's so rough. That makes me never want to play golf, dude, smoking that cigar.