Jim Bakker's Survival Buckets

But then there are the people who are selling the antidote to their fears. In the book, I call these people the Dread Merchants, right? The people who are going to sell you the bunker, you know? Jim Baker and his food. Oh yeah, Jim Baker and his survival water. How amazing are those buckets of food that you could use as the base of a table? Have you seen that whole video? I love those. And he talks about using them as portagons. Yes, yes. Yeah, he sells the Bible buckets as well. Have you ever seen... Bible buckets? What's a Bible bucket? It's just a bucket full of Bibles, you know? Just in case, right? Why do you need more than one Bible? I know. Yeah, well, maybe you got a big family. Maybe you're going to go Old Testament if she gets really weird. Have you ever seen the Vic Berger remixes of the Jim Baker? Yes, I have. Oh man, they are so much fun. Yes. I got really addicted to those when I was working on this project. It became almost like a mantra, you know? Having these running in the background. It's so strange that he was the guy that was attached to the Jessica Hahn controversy back in the 1980s. I mean, remember that? Do you remember the Jim Baker? He had had an affair with this woman and it became, for whatever reason, this big news. It's the same guy. He's around today. Because then we still expected people to be guided by their moral compass. Everyone's a hypocrite now. Right. Do you remember then there was Jimmy Swagger? I caught with a hooker and he was crying, I have sinned. Do you remember that? Do you remember that? That was good. Yeah, no one confesses anything anymore. No one admits anything anymore. Spread the word Bible bucket. Yes, I love that one. A bucket of Bibles. Why not? That's only 50 bucks. That's a pretty good deal. How many Bibles you get? Twenty-four. Wow. I think it's what it says. Should we get a bucket of Bibles? I feel like we should have one at the studio. Get one. Get one. I feel like we should have one at the studio. I'm the beast, but you should get one. If he gets 50 bucks from me, what the fuck do we do? We did at least a table worth. Right. A table's worth of Bibles. Six buckets. How many buckets makes a table? Shouldn't we get the food? Or should we just get the Bibles? One bucket of Bibles and five buckets of food. But it's fucking food. I love watching him feed the audience from the giant trough. You can get real good freeze-dried food that'll last forever. Hell yeah, you can. You don't have to get his bullshit. Yeah. What the fuck? Creamy potato soup. Oh my God. Look at that slop. That's disgusting. Shovell. Yeah. And they do a big thing of rice and they mix it all together. The big bucket of slop is poured on top of it. Google peakrefuel.com. This is my friend Chad Mendez. Has a really delicious company that they make actual ... I think it's freeze-dried. I think his stuff is freeze-dried or dehydrated. I'm not sure. People are doing it now. People are doing it now where you can keep this stuff forever. This is my buddy Chad's stuff. This is really good for you. It's actually delicious and healthy. Yeah. And he's doing mylar bags too. That's much better than doing buckets. Yes. And Chad is a former UFC fighter who's a great guy who's actually a hunter. Everything's organic and really healthy. When you reconstitute it, it actually tastes good. You don't have to buy that Jim Baker bullshit. You can actually buy this. Check this out. I went to a community just outside of Dallas. This is a budding prepper community. And they had built this 50-foot fountain ringed by the four horses of the apocalypse. Oh, Christ. I mean, it's like in a rural county, in a town with like 300 people. They bought all this land. It was a square mile of land. And it had these sort of green lagoons in there that were dredged out for grazing cows at some point. And they were going to revitalize these into these kind of like crystal blue lagoons with white beach sand. And they were going to build a bunker community in there called Trident Lakes. So the lakes are the blue lagoons. And he told me that their plan was to do a kind of outer perimeter wall around this that was going to be a giant berm around shipping containers. So essentially the wall would be hollow. And he said he was going to fill it with buckets of food and whatever. And I just kept imagining Jim Baker's Bible buckets just lined up down the walls of this thing. To keep intruders out. Just a fucking 12-foot high wall of Bible buckets.