The Austin Ice Storm & Ted Cruz Traveling to Cancun During Crisis

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Tim Dillon

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Tim Dillon is a stand-up comedian and host of "The Tim Dillon Show." His comedy special, "Tim Dillon: A Real Hero," is available now on Netflix. Look for his book "Death by Boomers: How the Worst Generation Destroyed the Planet, but First a Child" on April 30, 2024, and catch him as "Manny" in Eli Roth's "Thanksgiving." www.timdilloncomedy.com

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Hey, holding up. Did I move you out here at a bad time? Do you think? I mean, we considered suing you. I was sitting there going, can I take legal action against him? Like, I called a lawyer and apparently I cannot. Listen, I'll give you free meals. Yeah. Every time we go out, forever. We were, I mean, I was on a bread line two days ago. My opener flies into town, we're gonna fly out for shows. All the flights grounded, we can't go anywhere. I mean, we're waiting outside of a supermarket for an hour, and then we're eating fish sticks in the dark of my house with no power. And I'm like, you know, Joe fucking Rogan, man. This was a real fucking leap of faith, but it's looking better today. It'll be fine. It'll be fine. It was a once in, they're calling it a once in 120 year storm. But I think what that means is like, ever recorded. Like you go back to 1800, so what we're talking about, or 1900 or other. Like, what was the, what kind of fucking instruments were they using? Yeah, what were they jotting down? Thomas Almanac was the big thing back in those days. And I don't think they had. How did that work? Because that fucking thing was apparently kind of accurate. It's kind of witchcraft-y. Yeah, it's crazy. Yeah, they would predict like next year's winter cycles. Yeah, and harvests and things like that. Yeah. What did they do? How did it work? Well, it was just wild driving around Texas and seeing nothing but snow. And it looked like Vermont, it looked like you were in the Northeast, but it didn't, it was like wild to be in Texas driving around and nothing was open. Yeah. So like gas stations weren't open, fast food wasn't open, nothing was open. No. You know? Tell you what was open, the Houston airport. And my boy Ted Cruz is like, Yeah, he was out. And by the way, isn't it sad that like he couldn't get away with it? It's like, here's the thing about the Bush family. Say what you want about them, maybe Wack to Kennedy, bygones. But I mean, now our leaders can't even get caught taking a commercial flight to Cancun. Like that's pretty sad. But here's the thing, like, what can he do? What is the reason for him staying? Well, I think it's just the optics of how it looks. Yeah, but of course, no, he doesn't have any of... Can he make it warm out? No, I don't think he has any power to do anything good. Maybe he should be there with blankets. Yeah. Well, it's funny. It's like the people that hate him the most are the ones that are like, he should be there. And it's like doing what? Well, here's the thing, though. He was one of the vocal critics of Mayor Adler, who's a Democrat who went to Cancun as well. Right. What is it? Everybody goes to Cancun? I think he was in Cancun. Was he in Cancun or was he in one of those? He made the thing out of the house or something. Yes. But it was in Cancun or was it Puerto Vallarta? It was one of those nice places in Mexico. Yeah, and he wanted... And he's the mayor of Austin? Yes. He went down there and he was saying, now is not the time to relax. Yeah. Cabo. Cabo. So he went down there. Wow. I mean, that's the place to relax. I mean, fucking Sammy Hagar has got a song about it. I mean, it's crazy to watch. It's also crazy that he got caught and then he came back. Well, he said, I was always coming back. I was being a good father. Yeah. So you had to put a spin on it. Yeah, I was dropping my face. I feel because Ted Cruz is the face of the guy that always is caught. Like he looks like the kid at school who gets in on the prank too late. And then the teacher catches him. Like he just looks like he gets caught. He's not one of those guys who gets away with it. No matter what happens. He doesn't get away with it. No, he's... Did you ever see those videos that they made where it was... I don't know who released the full video. The videos that they made where he was running for president and he sat down with his mom. And he was talking about, you know, I go to church every day and she's like, every day. Right. His mom threw him under the bus. She's like, whoa. Yeah. Every day. Yeah. Yeah. His mom was like, bitch, you don't go to fucking church every day. And it was like they had a retake scenes and it was... Oh, the whole thing's a nightmare. But they showed it. How about somebody from the wife's group text leaked because they were inviting neighbors going, come to fucking Cabo or wherever the hell, come to Cancun. And somebody leaked it to the New York Times going, here's the group text proving they were inviting us all. I wonder how many moms were in that group text. Too many. Yeah, there's these are the video. This is great. But these things are always gross, man. Those like sit down with your mom. Let's pretend the camera's not here. Right. Tell everyone how good I am. I'm a good person. Right, mom? I'm a God-fearing Christian. Tell everyone what a good person your son is. Yeah, he was very good though. I have to give him props because there was this one situation where what was it? It was a tech thing where he was fuck. I don't remember. God damn it. We talked about it on the podcast, Jamie. Do you remember what it was where he was calling them out for God, it's escaping me, but I was actually kind of platforming people or privacy. Yes, it was like here is a video of him from the summer. He's like, who the hell are you? Who was he? Who is he critiquing though? Who's he criticizing? Google. Yes, and it says Ted Cruz on Google and big tech censorship. Yeah, there was a who the hell are you to decide who can speak? There was he was catching them in some hypocrisies and allies and it was like it was very good the way he was doing it and well-phrased. You got to give a little if you're gonna shit on the guy. Catch new episodes of the Joe Rogan experience for free only on Spotify. 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