Joey Diaz's Backyard Surprise Moment - JRE Toon

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6 years ago

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Joey Diaz

64 appearances

Joey Diaz is a stand-up comic, writer, and author. He's the host of the podcast "Uncle Joey's Joint with Joey Diaz," co-host of "The Check-In" with Lee Syatt, and author of "Tremendous: The Life of a Comedy Savage." www.joeydiaz.net

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Transcript

I can't tell a story about taking a shit without 90 people hitting me up the next day telling me that was the most brilliant story in the world. We're going to send it to Thompson's Court. Anytime I tell a shit story, the best was to take a shit in Faberman's backyard after a five hour drive from Colton or some weird town. Did he not talk to you after that for a while? I took the shit and then he ran over it with his car and the whole backyard smelling sewage waste. I go over to the next day. He goes, it smells back here. Let's talk in the house. He goes, I don't know what happened. And you can see the brown shit. He smooshed it with this tire and a bunch of flies. He didn't talk to me for a month after that. Who takes the shit in somebody's backyard? I didn't find out it was you. Because I told the truth. I felt bad. I lied to the guy. That's hard to clean up too. Wow. Yeah, shit. You can clean up dog shit. It doesn't even make you gag. But human shit? Bomb shit? Yeah. It smells so much stronger, man. We're gross. It's so much more gross. No, no, no. When you take a shit, it's okay. It's till you cut it in half. Right. When you cut a shit in half. No. When that fucking... I like it when it's off. When that Reese's Peanut but a Fume leaks out. Oh my gosh. He's like, I've done studies. He's like, I've done studies.