Joe Talks About Bigfoot and UFO's


3 years ago



Nate Bargatze

2 appearances

Nate Bargatze is a standup comedian and host of the "Nateland" podcast. His latest comedy special, "The Greatest Average American," is streaming on Netflix.


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You know, Les Stroud Yeah So he did that show about Survivor Man Bigfoot, yeah But it just went away Bro, that show, I love Les Stroud I love him I love Survivor Man, but that show was so fucking dumb Yeah He had a guy on the show that is known in the Bigfoot world as being full of shit Yeah Which is bad Like, the Bigfoot world is pretty open-minded Hahahahaha I mean, this is one of the things that I wanted to bring up about that 411 The Hunted thing There's audio recording that was supposedly taken from the 1970s From Northern California Um... I wanna say... Knocking Sonoma? I don't remember where it was It was somewhere in Northern California, but it's called, they call them the, uh... Samurai Sounds The Samurai, and it's the weirdest shit ever, man It's like, these guys had this spot that they would go into the mountains And they would hunt every year And they built this structure out there And then they brought recording equipment And they claimed to have recorded sounds of these animals These Bigfoot And that these Bigfoot were around them all the time while they were up there Now what's crazy about it is The sounds are so weird It sounds like someone pretending to be Japanese That doesn't actually speak Japanese Have you ever heard it? No We'll play it for you It's because it's the weirdest shit It sounds so strange and so fake But, you know, like, they have these quote-unquote experts that say the human voice is not capable of making sounds remotely similar to this The range is, which doesn't make any sense if you know who Michael Winslow is Yeah, yeah, yeah That guy who, that guy went on He does a woman peeing when she goes to the bathroom He does everything He did Led Zeppelin He played a whole lot of love with his mouth And it sounds incredible But, um, this Samurai sound, like, there's these loud whoops And these guys are like, in the foreground, you know, like, the guys who were recording They're trying to communicate with these things They sound so calm I mean, if there really was giant fucking eight-foot apes out there wandering around, like, you know, two, three hundred yards away from you screaming and whooping and talking Would you really, and you're in the woods, would you really be so calm? Wouldn't you be freaking the fuck out? Oh, yeah But these guys, do you have it? Yeah, I'm trying to make sure I find the right thing because I'm stumbling across some traps Oh Like people are making fucking around on the internet I wish I could remember the gentleman's name Well, I think I have it, is all I'm saying So, Ronald J. Morehead and Alan Berry, maybe? Is that right? Yes, Ron Morehead, yeah Yeah, that's it, the Sierra Mountains, that's what it is And so, um, it's the weirdest shit ever Listen, just listen to this, you're gonna I read what it could be, but we'll listen first It could be bullshit, that's what it could be I'm gonna get you this I'm gonna get you this Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa Oh, hold on That sounds like it's an all aboard Oh, hold on Hold on Hold on Hold on Listen to the guy This is, hold on, stop, stop, stop This is a terrible version of it There's a better version of it where you can hear the guys really clearly The people talking, I don't know why that's so scratchy But they're like They're over by the lake Like, they're talking like that This very strange sound And they're being calm about it You know, supposed vocal experts are analyzing it The human body is incapable of making such sounds What about that guy that might do you up What about that guy that might do you up You know, in that area of You got it? I don't know, it says HD Okay, we'll hear it Thanks for tonight They're knocking That's another thing that Sasquatch do They knock I'm not gonna cry They're knocking That one's weird Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Alright Scoot ahead a little bit You hear the samurai sounds Still sounds terrible Anyway These people believe that shit Les Stroud was balls deep in this Balls deep Apparently he had an experience And I talked to him about his experience It was pretty interesting He was in, not with that guy But he was in Alaska And apparently he heard some crazy noises Like some monkey sounds outside of his In the middle of nowhere No one was in there And he said he heard something run away Some bipedal sound of something running away But again, even though he's an experienced woodsman And he's a guy who's, you know, camped out Countless nights in the middle of nowhere And survives in the middle of nowhere And documents it Like, he's the reason why those survivor shows exist Yeah Because that guy literally would starve to death And try to eat like bark and whatever the fuck he could for a second You could see his face like sinking in He was losing weight I mean, he really did do that He did all sorts of different things to try to survive And then documented how he was doing it And what he would do But he got obsessed with Bigfoot And then developed that Bigfoot show And unfortunately a lot of people lost a lot of faith in him because of that They're like, no, you're the legit survivor guy And now you're doing this show And this is why it's ridiculous There was one episode of the show where they had this guy Who he was with who had video of a Sasquatch Like high definition video And it looks so fake Yeah It's like the Sasquatch is looking at him through the woods And he's like, there he is, there he is And it's a guy with a mascot That's how he is He yells out, I'm a Sasquatch Like, okay, he just yelled that out Oh, you're not Yeah, he makes the Sami noise But this, you know, the guy who had the video is known to be like full of shit And here he's got this guy on a show And then he, you know, is this real? You be the judge Like, yeah, I'm gonna say it's not real It's a guy with a fucking mask on I think I did read that, that guy was very not respected Yes By the Bigfoot community You know, the Bigfoot community Again, very open-minded Yeah, he ferishes into everything This other thing, like, they would see trees that would fall over Like in certain patterns And they were convinced that Sasquatch was leaning these trees against each other I thought it was like, yeah, to let you know where not to go Yeah, they had this idea I mean, it's all theory, right? Yeah, I think I was following the wrong guy, dude I believe all the stuff that you like is fake I'm like, yeah, I only watched that Lester, I went because of that other guy Well, I want it to be real That's the thing I do, too If someone had a convincing Bigfoot encounter where they caught it on video Where I was like, holy shit, what is that? Or there was something But there's nothing Like, you know, I've talked to a lot of those people And I did this show called Joe Rogan Questions Everything for Sci-Fi And me and Duncan Trussell actually went camping in the Pacific Northwest We didn't really camp We pretended to go camping and then we went to a hotel Yeah And then we came back the next morning Like, well, rough night of camping But we were out there for days Trying to look for Sasquatch and talking to people that hunt for Sasquatch And the one conclusion that we came to is it's a bunch of unfuckable white dudes Yeah, it's just out there Just out there camping It's just, but the desire for it to be real is so strong It would change I watched, you know, like that Finding Bigfoot show I used to always think, because people would be like, why is it on? I'm like, I don't know, man, because it's fun to watch And if they find him, the world is different now Like, if they come back with Bigfoot, everything's different Everything's different It's the alien thing Yeah The fact that they're saying that that's true You're like, that's a lot, dude That's a lot to take If we get, you know, I know that they have the videos and stuff of the aliens But like, if you, if you get up straight up and start talking to one I mean, I don't know what's going to happen Well, here's something that came out today, Jamie I'm going to send you this Because Sagar and Jetty from Rising on the Hill and I have been going back and forth with this And I found this today and sent it to him It's, I'll send it to you right now, Jamie It says, paradigm shifting UFO tech that alters space time is operable U.S. Navy Chief Tech Officer So it's some story that I didn't bother looking into Because I saw it when I was on my way out the door And I was like, what in the fuck is this? Because there's been all these sightings of these things that move In some weird way Paradigm shifting UFO tech So there's these things that move in this weird way that don't show any propulsion system And, oh, due to censorship, please join us on Telegram Look at this, documents obtained by the drive show the revolutionary technology that is capable to alter space time May actually be operable According to the Naval Aviation Enterprise Chief Technology Officer, Dr. James How do you say that name? Sheehee? Why is it operable in quotes? What is that? I don't know, good question Reflect on why is technology that has the potential to change the entire human experience for the better Always used for the defense purposes and military applications What are the betterments, what about the betterment of humanity? Yeah I don't know But it's Christopher Mellon who's that guy who keeps coming up with all this UFO tech stuff Can you scroll back up please? Someone's just like writing, I was reading through Twitter, it's like a story, it's not really like an article Right Twitter feed of Christopher Mellon, the former Deputy Assistant Defense Secretary for Intelligence from 1997 to 2002 Doing so, I came across an interesting post from the drive Regarding documents they received via the Freedom of Information Act regarding a space time modification weapon Developed by the US Navy, which apparently has already gone through experimental testing This in turn led me to evidence suggesting that other revolutionary type of technology that could no doubt be used to change the world for the better Blah blah blah was already operable Yeah, I don't know But this is what, if you pay attention to the UFO world, you pay attention to that shit at all? Not like actively There's a guy named Bob Lazar and it's one I do know that from, cause you talk to him Yeah It was one of the weirdest conversations I've ever had Cause you're like, I mean, are you crazy, are you full of shit or is this real? Yeah Cause if it is real It's wild This thing is a special effect, created a guy who is a special effect artist Do you remember his name, Jamie, who made this thing for us? This gentleman He's got a Design Designs by Perry Designs by Perry at Instagram And he created this thing And this is like a scale model of what Bob Lazar supposedly worked on He was hired by the United States military to work at area S4 Which is part of the area 51, like area 51 site S4, site 4 Was this place where he allegedly worked to back engineer these spaceships And the way these things moved around was exactly how this Christopher Mellon guy Or this article rather, that quoted him as describing That they used some sort of gravity, space-time bending technology So they didn't use a propulsion system like a rocket, shoot flame out the back They bent time in front of them and just would shoot instantaneously To wherever the fuck they wanted to go So you'd be like instantly be able to go Instantly What's fucked is that there was an instance off of the coast of San Diego in 2004 Where a Navy pilot by the name of commander David Fraver Who I've also had on the show experienced this thing that they called the Tic Tac UFO They tracked it with radar They tracked it with their camera systems on their plane And they even have video footage of this thing It went from 80,000 feet above sea level to one in a second Wow That's the amount of time that it takes radar to do the blip blip So in that time it traveled 80,000 feet They have no idea how the fuck it did that It shows no propulsion, heat signature They took video footage of this thing And it went from there, it took off Where they couldn't even follow it with their eye It just disappeared to the predetermined destination Where they were supposed to coordinate later So it's like it's reading their tracking systems Or reading where they were going And the people that worked on the aircraft carrier were telling the fighter pilot Like we've been seeing these things over, you know We see them like every couple weeks We have no idea what the fuck's going on Yeah And they just say, well there it is What are we going to do about that? Yeah I like to picture like an alien in that Tic Tac He's like, well slow it down You're kind of crazy right now He's having a bad day Because he's got to be having just a day Whoever's in there, some kind of day Maybe having a day That's a, it's a lot to Yeah, I don't know You think it's like a lot to just tell people Like if they had to be like, to tell like just earth All of us humans on earth to like wrap our head around what would happen I think what do you say if that's all you know Like if you are the military And all you know is that something can do these things Something can move at this speed You know the New York Times had a front page article about it a couple years ago And basically they're saying, hey, you know there are videos of things moving in a way that we don't understand That aren't exhibiting a heat signature that indicates a propulsion system We don't know what it is And this is, and then the, there's the COVID-19 bill that just got passed And one of the provisions in the COVID-19 bill is that they have 60, no 180 days to release all the information they have about UFOs That's a lot, you know But I don't know if they're gonna do anything with it I think they're gonna do nothing with it That's funny that it's in this COVID-19 bill Yeah, well, a lot of weird shit was in the COVID-19 bill Like foreign aid, there's a lot of foreign aid to Pakistan, aid to all these countries It's like people just, to get it passed, they're like, okay, we'll say yes But I want you to do a little favor for me and put this in the bill And it just shows you how greasy politicians are Yeah, yeah, it's kind of crazy Yeah, but that's allegedly what all that UFO technology is Wow