Joe Rogan on Vampire Deer & Crazy Animals

Things. Yeah. I mean, we've kind of sorta mapped out the terrestrial stuff. More or less. Yeah. There's like a few weird things you find in the jungle, weird bugs. Like where's that? Vietnam has some surprises for us. Deer with fangs. You ever see those? Oh, the Sulawesi boars or the deer. Really deer? Vampire deer. I don't know. I don't know about vampires. It's the craziest looking thing ever. It's deer with fangs, like crocodile looking fangs that come hanging down like this. This is some Jackalope thing. No, it's not. It's a weird little animal. It's not a big deer either. Well, do you know? Look at that thing. Vampire deer. That's a real animal. Look at that. How fucking strange. What was it? What was in this coffee, Jamie? Look at that thing. Look at the fucking teeth on that thing. It's probably something akin to their antlers. They use it to defend themselves. Okay. That's not real. That one's not real. That's a mule deer. See that one that you just picked? That's some Photoshop bullshit. What's interesting is apparently elk have these things called the, the, the, people call them ivories now, but they, what they are is at one point in time, they had tusks, like a boar, like giant tusks that probably aided them in their fights and they eventually shrank. And now they're just this weird sort of nubby thing. I actually have some here. I'll show it to you. Yeah. Yeah. They're in the, after the podcast I'll show them to you, but they, there are this weird thing that's like not quite a tooth. It's ivory that grows inside their head. And at one point in time, it was some kind of a weapon just like their head is. I mean, the antlers are, you know, that's the largest, how did we describe this? What was the, the, the, the quickest growing thing in the animal world is the, the antlers of an elk. Okay. Cause look how fucking huge they are. They fall off every year and they grow back every year. And it's all just for fighting. And they used to grow back tusks too, or these to have the answer to the tusks were permanent, but they used to just, that's just for duking it out. Yeah. It's crazy weaponry. Sexual selection. Well, you want to know a really weird thing. The dung beetle. Um, there's a conserved system whereby in some dung beetles, the amount of weaponry you have as your antler is inversely proportional to the amount of copulatory apparatus you have. Where it counts. Whoa. And so if you have really impressive, uh, weaponry, you're not able to do quite as much and that may be the engine of speciations because the vagina and penis in that system is a lock and key. And so if something shrinks too much, then you can't necessarily get, get the job. So if a greedy dung beetle with giant horns just fucks everybody up, his genes can't pass on, maybe there's a certain round of cooperation that's needed in the dung beetle world. Yeah. Can't have an oppressor. Can't have a Genghis Khan of the dung beetle world. The patriarchy in the, in the dung beetle world. Look at the size of the antler on that guy. Yeah. But girls make fun of him probably in the dung beetle world. Well, he's like, he's like the guy with the Lamborghini. Exactly. Like what's he doing over there with these giant, it looks like elk antlers. Probably has a tiny little dick. You want, you want a guy who's just got little wool like that, like that guy. Probably, probably hung like a roach. Right.