Joe Rogan on Javelinas

Nobody likes you. No one likes you, but you I haven't you do survive pretty well. You'd be better off being a javelina What's a javelina? It's a peccary. What's a peccary? It's like a cousin to a pig. What's a pig? You ever see that have a Leah do we know Doug lives, you know Doug lives in Bisbee, Arizona, Stanhope Um, oh by the way, I think it's so it's sold out But he's taping his his next special in Vegas next month. Oh nice. Yeah in Vegas That's cool where he lives in Bisbee like he basically that's that's a javelina He lives really close to the border. Like I think he's only like six miles from the border or some crazy shit and These things live in the wild out in the desert, right fucking they're aggressive Yeah, and they fucked up his neighbor's dog. They killed his neighbor's dog. No Yeah, man the dog was out and the javelinas will flank it like to get on both sides of it and they they Hunt like in the pack. Yeah, they hunt in the pack and they will attack a small dog. Ew That thing's disgusting. Yeah, they're gross. That's that's like a giant rat. It looks like a giant rat. Well It does. Oh, it looks like a pig fucked a rat. Oh somebody shot it in the face though Crossbow people hunt them all the time. Looks like a pig fucked a rat. I see that guy shot one Doesn't go get pig fucked around. Yeah, click on the guy who shot one Yeah Bow and arrow a lot of guys hunt them with archery equipment See wouldn't it be better if he was dressed in like a coat with a tie? No, no You don't want that thing to see you look at that. That's a rat face. Oh, that is picture though on a giant body Scroll back to that last one and make it bigger again. Yeah, bro. That guy's hunting rats That's like a slightly different looking rat Oh, you want to know it's really a giant rat that's a hundred pound rat. Yeah without a tail That's so gross. And you know, what's really crazy is those animals They'll they're the best animal to a call Now what a call is is like you'd made a make a sound of a wounded animal. No, you make like Like something that's suffering like people take their hand These fuckers run in they run in really. Yes. They're so aggressive It's crazy. They think something's hurt and I can go eat it They but they have to act quick because there's coyotes out there and mountain lions out there So when something's hurting and they hear like fuck food and they just run towards it So when you're bow hunting you almost have to have one person make the call and you're at full draw And then they start calling and the things come running in and you shoot at them Yeah, cuz you couldn't do it you couldn't get to the bow You wouldn't get the wrong time because they'd see you and they go fuck it's a guy Turn off the other way again Yeah Are these like invasive are these all over his property? No, they're natural They're there but I mean are they not invasive, but I mean, is there a lot of them? Yes, there's like a ton around Exists. Yeah, I mean they exist in the desert. I mean they exist in healthy enough populations You people hunt for them Wow and they eat them. They say they taste you. Yeah, I would need that But you eat eat a pig. Yeah, but they're cuter wild boar. Yeah crazy tusks looking Yeah, those are gross too pretty gross. No my pigs My kids agree this the ones I have bow ties climbing around this guy's garage and little tap shoes Look at this shit. Look at this shit. They're staring down bro. They're staring him down there in his garage There's a whole bunch of them fuck is that all right on your kids toy Look at this. It's all its hairs up. Yeah, I mean way look at that It's just gonna take a dump in your driveway. You do not want that in your life. I don't want to live there This is all there's fucking 20 of them in this guy's driveway. See that one there in the back How many roll that back again? How many were there there was like 12? What is the name of that video for people? I want to watch it wild have Alina's make a visit to Arizona home Yeah, no, no, no, I know you can't show it though those fucking things are everywhere There's a lot of them with the wild have a lean how many of them there are At least at least eight and then there's the one that was on top of the there's nine and then there's one that was on top Of the truck and there's one you can see through the fence. Yeah, and there's probably more out there, too It's going in the car. It's going into the kids little car. Jesus Christ. It's in the passenger seat of the car Oh Gross fucking I feel like wild have Alina is like a Dean Martin song They're weird-looking too they look like they're demons I don't like them at all little beady eyes like they're up to no good but If you're a little kid you're thinking like I would I wouldn't live there because that's there But if you live in New York you've had night who knows what's climbing all around your building Could be Eagles and shit, right? So you're talking about no Google how do I get into my house in? Google have Alina eats, baby. Let's see if that's ever happened Yeah, human, baby Let's see if that happened. What do you think if I have Alina ate a human? Yeah, like you see those fucking things Yeah, 20 in that guy's dry. They definitely eaten babies. I'm exaggerating wasn't 20 someone's eating a baby right now It's probably 13. It was probably 12 bakers doesn't a baker's dozen of have Alina's Yeah, they would eat a baby a toddler. Yeah knock it down. Yeah, I mean if they eat a dog Yeah, you think they're scared of people there were obviously weren't scared of that dude now That's a full-blown person and a baby doesn't have fur doesn't have anything. I know I put it hair up Spikes up to let you know. It's threatened Did I ever tell you the story when I pulled a rat out of my pool vacuum? Yeah I Was it alive? No Did it stank it did it stunk? I'm like why isn't the vacuum working? Did you think about it? I dove in and I pulled it up And there was a half a rat its ass sticking out the vacuum And as soon as I got it above the water flies just Pull it out without it. There's a question. Where the fuck are the flies before the shit? Good question Where the fuck are they all over? They're not that many like if you if you're around Like a person's backyard. Yeah, how often you see flies every now and then there's one It's kind of annoying But if you just pull your pants down and shat on the ground There would be flies on that within a batter of moments. Oh, you mean right after I swam Yeah, right. Yeah, I'm just shot right on there long. I mean you're after swim shit. Yeah. Yeah, and then all of a sudden They show up. Yeah, that's disgusting. It happened so fast so gross All of a sudden they're all over it. Yeah, where'd you guys come from? We should just stay inside Did you find a baby death from a javelina a couple months ago? So a couple people in Arizona were attacked and they had like a woman was bit while she was walking her dogs Another guy was bit while he was feeding them and he didn't feed it fast enough and it bit him That's about as much like fine. Well the lady who got bit that's the scary one because the guy who fed him was an asshole Yeah Right the scary one. There was a lady got bit by a coyote recently in Dallas. Oh, yeah. No, no Yeah, I was around the Dallas area. I think they think that there's this one coyote that's been biting people. It's a rogue unusual coyote Snapping at people. Oh, really? Yeah, they had bite marks on their legs. Oh my god That's gross man, cuz they will kill you. Yeah, they would kill you. They're just small They're just not sure if it's worth the the effort and you're around people and they're worried that you know One-on-one could you fight off a coyote? I don't know if you could then I mean I think you probably could if you had to but they'll fuck you up man. Just keep biting. There's a few of them That's where the real problem comes. They bite you in the right spot. Yeah, man, the rip your tendons apart You won't be able to run away. They know what they're doing, too You know, they know what they're doing. They try to take your legs out and they know what they're doing They're not gonna try to jump up and bite you in the neck They're gonna try to take your your hamstrings out, right? Yeah, they're trying to rip your legs apart. So you can't run Why are they so mean? That's how they're alive You're not leaving any food out for him. Are you? No, you got to do what they got to do. It's called domestication That's how we have dogs. You ever take your family camping. I have not. Yeah, I haven't either I would though. I Wanted to take my kids to Yosemite because I love Yosemite to bring a peace sidearm. Nothing. Nothing. Just went solo We weren't camping. We're staying in and in we're staying in it in what about emergency food? No more satellite phone. Nothing Just a phone first aid kit nothing a Bag of Funyuns and an iPhone. Mmm, so I need and I want to show them Yosemite because it's such a great part of my life I love it. I've been in lives in the backcountry for like a week at a time I just love the whole thing and I'm telling them about it. I'm building it up They're like, you know grudgingly going they're all vegetarians. They just love nature. They just love whatever So I'm like you're gonna love Yosemite as soon as we drove into the park. Welcome to Yosemite I ran over a squirrel The horror inside the car dad you didn't even slow down what's wrong you're a monster I'm like I can't it's two lanes. There's a guy behind me a kind front. I just would steamroll the squirrel they were They were in the whole weekend. Anytime I'd be like look at this. Look at this beautiful view you killed a squirrel You didn't even care that's the weird part dad you didn't even care. Is that what they're saying? Yeah What are you supposed to cry? I was just laughing like a bitch Exactly. That's funny. Did you killed a deer you'd be sadder, right? Yeah She was so nice with her little eyes and a little tail but squirrel a peccary Yeah, if you're killing them havelinas like that fucking rat thing I find its mom that have Alina would ruin your car to bite your teeth. He'd probably use its teeth to tear your tires apart Then you'd be stuck in the side of the road trying to change the tire you turn around. There's a whole pack of them closing in on you Would you not take your family because of all of this? Do you not want them in the woods with you? What am I a danger in the woods or become a werewolf? What the fuck? I I'll be right back. Not that you're the threat run that you'd have to protect them from all the threats Well, I mean Yosemite doesn't have that many threats other than people bears. They have black bears then Yeah, most of them own lion mountain lions are an issue There's always something out there. Yeah Grizzly bear or you just you just don't feel like that's a cuz you like going out in the nature you go I do that stuff. I do like going to nature. I also like being indoors Like sleeping in a place where it's awesome to sleep People wiser than me have figured out that that maneuver is called a bed With a roof and a locked door and a refrigerator you fucking caveperson. Oh, I'm gonna rough it. I'm gonna sleep on the ground You don't have to you know that