A Lot of Dongs: Tom Papa's Trip to a Russian Sauna | Joe Rogan

Yeah, come on. Hendrix, please. I wanted one of those fringe jackets when I was in high school. So I played football until I was a senior and then once football season's over, I have a half a year left of school and that's when I smoked weed for the first time and started playing guitar and I won one of fringe jackets. I didn't have them, but I did get a pair of moccasins for a little while. I wore moccasins. Did they have beads? They did not have beads, but they had a little fringe too. Little tassels? They were like, it was just a little fringe. Yeah, no soul. Yeah. What's the purpose of fringe? Like that's like when you think of a trapper jacket, right? One of them, David Boone, Davey Crockett type dudes. Style. You can't give them wearing that. Just style. Is that what I was? Really? Yeah. Why would they have any style back then? Everybody's got style. Back then it seems like they were just trying to stay alive. Yeah, the weak ones. But the cool ones are still trying to get laid. You think Daniel Boone wasn't trying to work it a little bit? Look at this. Buckskins are often trimmed with a fringe. Originally a functional detail to allow the garment to shed rain and to dry faster when wet because the fringe asks a series of wicks to disperse the water or quills. Interesting. Oh, wait a bit. Wow. Buckskins derived from deer skin clothing worn by Native Americans. Oh, wow. How about that? That's genius. Smarter than you know. So it hangs down and the water goes through all the tissue in the deer and gets to the bottom. So those little things get wet, but the thing that you're wearing, the touch of your skin is dry. You would think by now that deer would have had fringe on their outfits. I think they don't give a fuck. Deer are really hot. Their body temperature is much higher than ours. Oh, really? Yeah, it's one of the weirder things about when you put your hands on one. Oh, yeah. Inside of them, they're really hot. Like if your hands were cold. So for like 98 degrees, what are they? I don't know. I would, if I had a guess, I'd say it's more than a hundred degrees. I would say that yeah, I bet they're probably like 105 degrees. Something like that. What is it? Which is what's the body temperature? It brought up the cooking temperature when I gave it to them. Oh, Jesus Christ. They're 350 degrees. They're cooking before we even catch them. That is hilarious. That's why people love deer. You don't have to cook them. They're pre-cooked. They're preheated. Same as most undulates, which is 30 degrees. At least we don't have it in 0.5 to 38.5 degrees Celsius, which we don't understand. Well, just type in the preheated deer meat. 38.5 degrees Celsius? What do you think that is? If you had a guess, I don't have a clue. What was the number? 38 degrees Celsius. Oh, that's 105. Is it? No. That's like 90. 99.5 to 100. Yeah. That's it. They're like us. One or two higher. They're like someone with a little bit of fever. Oh, I did something that you would enjoy. You might have even done this. Speaking of body heat. I was in San Francisco last weekend. Really? Performing and I was working with my friend Kira Soltanovich, very funny comedian. She kicks ass. She's Russian, she grew up up there and she brought me to a Russian like bathhouse. Oh, they beat you up with sticks? Yeah. Did you ever do that? No, they call it banya. Banya. Yeah. Man, oh man, you go into a sauna, a two level sauna, so it's even hotter like up at the top like an attic in a sauna. Super hot. And you lay down on this bench and they take these bushes, these sticks and they wet them and then they start beating you with them. Not a lot of pressure. It's so hot. You're in a sauna, you're already like really, really, and then that thing just... That thing is hot too. And that thing's hot and with the steam coming off of the branches as they're beating your back it creates a little pocket that gets even hotter. So it just brings your body to this super high temperature. They're making weather. They're making weather. They really are. Really? And yeah, for about 15 minutes and you come out of there and just feel... To jump in the cold afterwards? Yeah, into a cold plunge. Yeah. All the way under this really cold water. Amazing. Yeah, the Russians really liked that. Ador Emelianenko was one of the greatest heavyweights, if not the greatest heavyweight of all time. One of the things that you would see about his training was that it was very old school Russian. They did a lot of stuff on the park or in a playground. They did a lot of stuff in a playground and he incorporated the banja. That was a part of it. You see him lying there and they're beating him with sticks. There you go. I see it on Showtime. See there. Yeah, that's what... Yeah. They figured something out. All the people that invented sauna, they figured something out. There's something about that extreme temperature that just... It's very good for your ability to recuperate. You feel better. It reduces inflammation. That felt great. I went in there... I've been traveling so hard over the last couple of months. I've just been knotted up. I've just been like... I was like, maybe I'll do this and then get a massage after because that'll really... Like a gentleman. Like a gentleman. Yeah. I didn't have time. She had to go... She was driving me. She had to go do something. So we only had time for that part. When I came out of the banja or banja, I didn't need a massage. Everything was relaxed. Everything had changed in just like 15 minutes. Yeah. It was great. Man, I wish it was... I don't know if they have them in LA or not, but I'd like to seek them out. I know they have them in New York. There's one in West Hollywood. There is? Yeah. Photo spa or something like that. Yeah. There you go, bro. I'm gonna keep your pants on. A lot of dongs. Clothing was optional. Clothing optional. And I'm with Kira. We're like... Yeah. We're coworkers. And she's wearing nothing. She's totally naked. And then there's dongs everywhere? There's dongs everywhere. She sees the dongs? She sees the dongs. I see the dongs. But we were the only ones covered up. We were the... We were the only ones who can go and dongs stare in America. What's that? In America? Can you do this? Yeah. San Francisco. Are you sure? Yeah. Girls who's walking in a room with dongs? I think we need to say... Kira and I were the only ones with clothes on because we worked with each other. Send in immigration. I... send ice into that place. Send in the truth. A dong alert. Yeah, there's something going on there, bro. There's just dicks everywhere. Open that door. You cool with dicks in front of you? I'm not. What are they doing here? I was looking away. Cops just come in with fucking masks on. I'm a dong alert. Yeah, they throw one of those... What are those gas canisters that flashbangs? Just grabbing guys by their dongs and pulling them out. Everybody would run out. To the paddy wagon. It would all run out, grab them. That's the first thing you're gonna grab. If someone throws a tear gas canister that explodes in a room, they're gonna cover you on dick first. I'm wearing pants. So I was the only one with pants on and you kind of feel like everyone was looking at you like, you're making us feel like shamed because you're wearing pants. I might have just taken them off.