#2112 - Dan Soder

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Dan Soder

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Dan Soder is a stand-up comic, actor, on-air personality, and host of the "Soder" podcast. Check out his new special "Dan Soder: On The Road" available now on YouTube.https://youtu.be/1Lik3hSyhrY?si=NvFRtRwbFAbJBivLwww.dansoder.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Yeah, let's go, baby. Yeah, I forgot how good of weed you have. This is Katt Williams weed. Is it really? Yeah. Oh, shit. I'm gonna start talking shit on everyone in the business. And there ain't never been a day that Shane Gillis ain't never texted me your gay. Always calling me gay. We had Katt Williams ride the racing simulator and I filmed it and put some of it up on Instagram He's like this is how he drives He does this because he does this in real life. Yeah, I would love for his Katt Williams to be the voice of myself hate He's like you ain't never gonna be nothing, baby. You suck It's like I know just to wake you up every day and get it gonna work. Yeah, go Yeah, his David he's the new David Goggins. Yeah, he's like pain is good. Feel everything bad Pimpin I'm out here golfing. $5,000 sneakers. Dude, he's the book thing is still the funniest shit in the world. He doubled down and then some respect. He said, doubling down on a crazy shit is fucking hilarious. He was saying, I went to the library and I got 20 books at a time because that's all they would let you get. And I would be there three times a week. What? Often times I'd be reading eight books simultaneously because I have the original book and then I have books and annotated and Love it the idea that a librarian sees him coming and gets nervous Twenty only twenty twenty book I need to read thirty books today. How is it? How old are you saying a week? How many I don't give a fuck we say he's a gem that guy's a gem I love him. I was so happy that I got him to come on the podcast because like he's like Joe Rogan No, want me on this podcast? I do though. I fucking love that guy. I have always sung his praises when you heard him say that Did you talk back to the interviewer like but I do want you on no [2:05] No, no, I immediately went on Twitter. Yeah, I immediately went on Twitter and I said did I love that guy? Yeah, let's go And it was just they have never met him never met him until yesterday. I've never met him So it's just like we passed each other in the night at the store I just never was there when he was there and he was was already a big, you know, giant theater act by then. And now he's an arena act, you know, like he's just, I just never met him. That's all it was. Like it's hard to meet arena acts. Like unless it's Chappelle who still goes to the clubs. Yeah. Like I asked him to do the club. Like you want to do a spot at the club? So he goes, I'm an Just to clarify with someone like that is. Like I do arenas too. It's okay. Like the club is amazing. Can't. Yeah. Not enough people. No, I think he genuinely doesn't enjoy being in tight crowds like that. I think he's uncomfortable. And I just, I told him I go, you got too famous. And he was like, like, I go, you got too famous. I mean, he's been doing arenas for over 10 years now, [3:06] probably. And then theaters the whole time. Well, Pimp Chronicles was when? When was Pimp Chronicles? I want to say, I'm gonna guess. I mean, I know James is gonna look it up. I'm gonna guess, oh, two, oh, three. Somewhere around that. I watched that in the gym yesterday before I came to do the fuck. It's one of the greatest stand-up specials of all time. It's fucking amazing. The amount of... The energy, yes. It's like up there with the energy of Chris Rock bring the pain where there's like, it's like, yell laughter. But it's his own flavor. It's the best dude. It's his own flavor of comedy. Like his flavor of comedy is uniquely Katt Williams. Yeah. Like the way he can repeat things and they become funnier. Who could fucking repeats a line and it becomes funnier? Yeah. He died. Get the bit gets better. He. He. Like you're at the end of the fur coat. Come on son. I was saying even his 2019 special was so funny that I sat [4:00] through 16 minutes of Jacksonville jokes. Yes. Acting like I knew that about Jacksonville. Like I'm like, oh, those bridges. I forget who Chris Rock was watching it with, but they were going crazy just because he was just talking about Florida for the 16 minutes. Oh, local. And by the way, you're laughing with him. At the whole time. He doesn't lose you. And then the special just gets better and better. He was doing sex robot bits on that. Yeah, he's a monster. I think he is top 10 of all time and people don't even, I think he gets overlooked a lot for a guy that's been doing arenas. Well, there's a lot of controversies and craziness. Yeah, but that's what you get when you get a brilliant mind. You get a fucking Ferrari engine on a kid's bike. Yeah. And sometimes it goes off the rails. Oh, absolutely. It's almost like Howard Hughes shit, where you're like, you either gonna be wearing a boxes of clean X's shoes or wrestling a seventh grader and it's gonna be comb. Because that shit, if you had enough money, you'd be like, nuke the internet. I want that off. But when you see the Howard Hughes type character, you see those guys and just get completely isolated and they can't interact with people. That is terrifying. [5:06] But I see it, I get how it happens. I see how it could happen. Hey, a lot of money. Yeah, a lot of money and like. You become defensive, like crazy defensive in paranoid. Uh-huh. The paranoia is the thing that makes you just go like, no, I'm just gonna grow my beard and my fingernails and not leave outside. Well, you stop, you have to stop and think about the time that Howard Hughes lived in, okay? And how easy it was to kill somebody. Yeah. There was no fucking video cameras everywhere. There was no cell phone cameras. There was no DNA evidence and everyone was corrupt. And people, you know, like, it wasn't a thing where after 12 hours, you're like, let's get, let's get eyes on it. It would be a couple days. Yeah, they'd be like, you just didn't show up for work for sure. They'd want to kill you. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you're the billionaire guy who's controlling the schools. Oh my God. You're making weird decisions about the drinking water in the town. You're a Rockefeller. You gotta be, you better be concerned. Yeah, you better have people around you. [6:05] Well, that's where you gotta worry about. Who are you insulating yourself with? Because if you're like a billionaire like that and you've got crazy motherfuckers in your ears, you're gonna do, that's how you get, like, last time I was here we were talking about Saddam Hussein's kids. That's the kind of similar shit. You just get like crazy people around you, some McAvellian shit, and you're like, yeah, burn the town. It's always the evil son of the king, right? Yeah, mafia kids. Mafia kids are always not as good at mafiaing as their dad. That's the kind of dangerous because they didn't earn it. They just got that power, so they've never had to work for it, which is really weird. Which also leaves a hole. I think it leaves like a... They have to prove themselves more too. Yeah, whereas if you make your money yourself, there's always this like gaining momentum where you're like, what am I doing? Right, you know you didn't just hit the lottery. Yeah. Well you kinda hit the lottery at many steps along the way. It lucky, but there is a lot of work involved in getting to where you are. So you know your progression and what you put in [7:06] to get to that progression. But if you just are born the son of a king. That's where you have a dragon. Yeah, you're just like, let's torture. Let's torture about dogs. You're probably not to like empathize with these guys, but you're probably trying to feel something. You're probably like everything is all the great shit that I have does nothing to me. That would change someone's life. So now what do I gotta do to move the meat? Yeah, okay. Then they're like, oh, the milk of magnesium. And just putting hot flames on people and shit. When did they figure out cocaine? Who is the first to figure out cocaine? A brave person. A brave person that knew a little bit about science. Cause it's like weed where you can just pull it off and put fire to it. Cocaine and alcohol takes someone so dedicated to getting fucked up that they become good at science. [8:00] Because I watched, have you ever seen that show traffic now there's this woman who's like one of my personal heroes uh... mariana vanzellar she was she was a she's like a real on the ground journalist like those dangerous play yeah the kind of the people that need to do i was could have stopped the ptsd i don't know what the she seems seems to find, which is crazy. All those war correspondence are all like, you're like, you need to probably go do something to erase everything you've seen. She was first on the show like 10 years ago because she exposed the fentanyl issue and the opioid issue in Florida, where they had those pill mills and they didn't have a database. So you could go to, they call them pain management centers, you would go there, you would talk to the doctor on the left side, the doctor would say, oh, you need pills, and you go to the right side and they give you pills. And that's all they have is pills. And then people would go to multiple ones, stockpile, get a big bag of them, go to different doctors, you can go many doctors. Yeah, oh yeah, they call that, what do they call it, doctor shopping or like going around and like, [9:05] there's a word for it where they go doctor to doctor. Yeah, you could, you could back then, you could do it cause they didn't have a database. Which everybody thought was insane. This is a controlled substance, a highly addictive arrow and they take in pill form. And you don't, you don't have a database? Yeah, it is like, I don't know. Did you combine it in? You go, no. And you're like, we can't tell. She did a whole documentary on it, called the oxycontinx press. And it was amazing. I'm gonna absolutely check that out. But she went to the fucking jungle of Columbia to where they make cocaine and film the whole process with the people making it. And then hiked out with them when they carried it on their backpacks through the jungle. Who does she talk to? Does that that up? To also feel comfortable. You're like at any moment, I mean the jungle in Colombia? I'm fucking dead. I got my little recorder and I go, so do you like cocaine? And they're like, man. You can expose to your enemies roughly where this is. [10:04] Yeah, yeah. Roughly. You're gonna give away some information that can be used against you. I'll find those guys who are on that video. I don't need, they have a mask on. I know who that is. That's Pedro. I know Pedro. Like if you had a fucking mask on and you were talking, I heard you guys, that's Dancer. You don't have to do it. You guys like watch your man You never do it at all Katt Williams. Yeah, while you're working up cocaine. I ain't giving away this cocaine. I ain't no one touching it Pimpen Just just the entire time you work at the coke factory That's good. Different voices or just I changed my voices So no one knows who I am. I'm like I'm pulling this cocaine is unbelievable And they're like days of the old back doing co, when I was a, I was a bus boy at this steakhouse in Aurora growing up when I was in high school and we would smoke cigarettes in the room that wasn't being used, it's when you could smoke in restaurants and there was this old waiter and he was a former Marine and he was like, old school like, [11:00] I don't wanna talk about it, old school, Like did some shit. And then one time after work, me and my buddy Micra sat in there and we were smoking. He'd spoke cool unfilters. And this guy was just telling us stories about he was a sniper in the army. And his job in Central America was to kill donkeys that were carrying drugs north. And he's like, because we're always asking, like, you kill people? He's like, uh, cause we're always asking like, you kill people, he's like, no, I just shot a shit ton of donkeys. And he said, cause all these donkeys, we just have all this weight on him. And then then he just pop them in the middle of the jungle. And he'd be like, well, now you've got, you know, and then it would set up like, okay, now go get him. But this dude, just like, no, but did you kill people? He's like, no, you're not listening to what I did. I fucked their shit up. What a really dumb way to handle a problem. Is what? Here's the problem. Some people think you shouldn't do cocaine. Yeah. So we're gonna lock everybody up who sells it. So the only people that are gonna sell it are the people that can get away with sell it in Mexico. [12:01] Yeah. And those people are going to be a super billionaire, powerful cartel, like an army, an industry, an army, a well-funded army. Yeah. And they're, they can walk here. Yeah. And that's because you don't want people over here to sell Coke, even though people want to buy Coke. Yeah, let it rip. I kind of feel like that's the only real answer. I don't do it, don't do it, but if it was sold in America, it would be actual Coke. Like, is it that hard to sell pure Coke? I bet it would. I bet it would make a lot of people's lives better and a lot of people's lives worse. A lot of people's lives worse for sure. It would go like this. The Richard Prior got just regular Coke and it ruined him. Yeah, I mean some say a hundred Estons some say under Estons writing I mean all of course all of that school got the way cocaine made him feel fucking duck And he's in this psychology. Yeah, I bet there were some Freud talks that you're like dude [13:02] I don't want to do this and he's like, think about it. You want to fuck your mom. And he goes, dude, Simon, we're on a lot of below right now. He's like, dude, it's like 80s Coke movies where you know they were writing and making it when they were doing Coke. There's some of those movies. Like, what are you saying? Electric, I probably not but electric two, electric boogaloo? Break into electric boogaloo? I watched that in my hotel room the other thing and I was like, this was written on cocaine. Cause every scene just goes like, and then they're here, and then they're here. And then they're here and everything's alright. My number one speculation is showgirls. Yeah, showgirls was written with a half erect penis. That movie was written by a guy that's like, and then boobs come out. Man, that was that movie hit when I was in middle school, like right when Jerkin' Off started. And so it was a gold mine, because you could be like, it's the legitimate movie. It wasn't porn, right? But she's topless. Oh, dude, the sex scene in the pool is the dumbest shit where she goes like, [14:00] she starts frothing around. She looks possessed. It doesn't make any sense that anybody would be like, not lose their boner and go, oh my God, she's insane. I'm gonna be sex with insane person. Also, that would hurt having sex like that. You'd be like, hey, come down. It was only NC17. The first and to date only NC17 filmed to be given a wide release mainstream theaters. I'm telling you. It made it am. It was so dumb. That's what it's all about movies. It's so stupid. It's great. But it's great to watch. It's great jerk off. It's all the same. It's great to watch because it's so goofy. Like if you're with a bunch of buddies and you get high and watch showgirls, you're gonna laugh. You're gonna laugh really. Hinch Cliff, All the dialogue, the choppy dialogue, it made cinematics movies look better. Where you're like, man, we were really making fun of Shane and Tweed and all those cinematics movies. And then you're like, actually much better than this. It's better than showgirls. But showgirls, this is so wild movie. They were like, um, Jesse Spano gets naked. I mean, I'm telling you, it timed out perfectly with me. I was young enough to watch save by the bell and take it seriously, [15:06] that by the time puberty hit and show girls happened, you're like, I was waiting for something like this. You're like, I think kids now get it too quick. Way too quick. Deceptualizing of like everything happens, so. Well, boys are seeing porn the moment they get a phone. Yeah, they know. The moment they get a phone. Why wouldn't you? You can't stop them. They're too smart. My youngest, my middle daughter rather. She figured out how to, my wife put a password on her phone. Yeah. And so she could limit the use. She figured they record the screen and give my wife the phone. So my wife punches in the numbers. It's recording the screen. It's like Velociraptaptors learning how to open doors She was 12 that is they they know so fast was that so creepy. Yeah, I think you little raptor Yeah, like imagine that go here mom [16:00] Here's my phone I really agree with you that limitations are important. I want to see the puppies. And she's like, look at this green time. And it's four hours of TikTok. She goes around the corner and she looks and she's like, we got her. Well, they're little drug dealers. Yeah. That's what the phone companies are. A little drug dealers for kids. Yeah. I mean, we do drug dealers and the kids are I think it's one of those things where you're like, what's gonna be their response to it? Because they're smart, they can do shit like that. When they get older, are they gonna be like, hey, we should limit this? No. No, it's not gonna be limited. We're in it now. We're in it now, and this is us. And I think it's just gonna get more and more invasive. Because that seems the direction that it keeps going. If I had a guess, and then this is obviously just a guess, I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about, but I feel like this can't be stopped, especially with AI. When they're talking about AI and all the things that AI can do for you now, it's just people are getting papers written, [17:01] they're getting busted all the time. This chat GBT is writing them. Any answer to kind of anything. It can code websites instantaneously. It can do your voice. It can replicate your voice. The Google One can't show white people though. That really? Which is a real issue. No really. You didn't know this? Oh, dude. Are you ready for this? Google is the Google One to show images of World War II Nazi soldiers. Yeah. And they made it all woke. So they made like a Native American Nazi. They have an Asian lady Nazi. They have a black man Nazi. You are describing the perfect punk album cover from the 80s. Well, they it couldn't describe the founding fathers of the United States. Well, they were just they were men, but were they? Did they identify as men? Do you have to see some of these pictures? Can you got any jamming? I was seeing it on Twitter. Here's my question to you. And this is the perfect place to ask this question about cell phones. Do you think there's any chance that cell phones are weapons from aliens that disarm us? [18:10] Because we're all looking down and they know it can use our emotions. Like a grenade that takes a long time to explode where they're just like, because we each have them. Everyone, like, because I love alien shit. And you're like, well, there's got to be some alien technology. If they're watching us, they just drop something. They're like, hey, you guys want to watch them get fucked up? Let's give them cell phones. Look at that. That's great. Family fathers of America. See, summer. I like how one of them is a a Nazi. Yeah, that's so crazy to say that's one of the founding fathers of the United States. No, that's who we stole away from. That was this was what were you talking about? You go to the images of Vikings. Dude, that's great. As someone dude in a black lady. Yeah. Look at the popes and Indian woman and an African man. [19:00] It's amazing. This is hilarious. Google Gemini. That's so funny. Google Gemini is like, I don't want to say it. That's not good. Because you are messing with the fiber of reality to fit in with your ideology. You shouldn't be doing that if you're in control of artificial intelligence. It's supposed to be an artificially intelligent program that takes all the information the world and gives you a take on things, right? It's not supposed to be an indoctrination tool. You can't use it to... You're saying no, it's an opinion. It should be a regurgitation, not an opinion. You can't fucking lie about who the founding fathers were. Man, but imagine if you could use AI to make it yourself look awesome. If you're just like any AI dance otter stuff, you're like seven foot tall, could dunk easy. Run up and down the court. Show me the one where they showed the Nazi soldiers, because the Nazi soldiers ones the most preposterous. Look at this. Look at this. And Indian Nazi nurse. Like the darkest African looking man you'd ever seen. [20:02] Was the top left, they're attempted a white guy and they're just like, ah, we can't even do it. I think the top left is a white guy. So they gave you one white guy when it came to German soldier. But they just got an Asian lady. You got an Asian lady, Nazi? What? What the fuck are you saying? What the fuck did you say? Do you know what a Nazi is how are you so dumb and yet so smart? Yeah, that is the dumbest thing I've ever seen in my fucking life We're gonna need to hope that robots stay that way when they turn on us that there's still some stupidity in them so we can win It's this weird white thing that they have a problem with white people. Yeah, I so bonkers I also just don't know like the programming like people can program this people are at what point does AI get away from people at what point does AI because you remember that thing where they had I want you to imagine a world where it was the opposite I want you to imagine a world where you said show me Muhammad Ali and it shows you this white guy didn't they like do that with like rock and roll [21:00] where they're like hey black music but it's a white guy well for sure that was the the criticism of Elvis Yeah, that he stole yeah, yeah rock and roll like Ray Charles never liked Elvis like Ray Charles to talk shit about it Really yeah, you really see Ray Charles talking shit on Elvis. I want to see you gotta see it It's immediately with his sunglasses on talking shit, but it'd be for a fact if he took it off and looked at the camera He's like look at me he's got to blind eyes. Fucking was pressing my gray eyes. Look at Oracle. I'm gonna touch you. He grabs your wrist and takes his hair. Okay, not necessarily. You know better than I. Let me ask you differently. How good was Elvis? What Elvis did? he caused a lot of the populous if you wanted to and usually when people they're popular they usually need white people To start listen to a lot of music that normally wouldn't have been listening to and black people would be going out sugar they'd be high and put for [22:00] Centres what else unusual about the sugar and the hip and stuff and that's all others was doing was copying that He was doing It's funny Everybody else a punk Everybody in entertainment has that love where they go like, yeah, he did this, but also fucking, let's stop sucking his dick. Everyone in entertainment has that exact muscle, that response muscle like. So he's the king, he ate the fucking king. It might be off microphone, but everyone Katt Williams is off. Right, but in his case this is a totally different time in history you got to think of that was like if you are really good black artists you actually couldn't get on TV yeah it wasn't like today yeah black artists are hugely successful they're like no you're not happy back then you were not going to make it [23:04] yeah and they were gonna really promote this white guy Oh, yeah, a white guy walking the shit out of this white guy those would scream and cry like this what we've been looking for that Reaction can I all can I just say that reaction always has been like There's no way I could handle that someone scream crying with the second they saw you well he couldn't handle it either yeah look at having him he went crazy he just with both the Vegas living in Vegas full time and just doing fucking pain pills like living right next to soron's dick yeah yeah yeah just the pole it's just the eye of the sky oh they're giving you weird jumpsuits and you learn how to end you're doing all kinds of drugs. But by the way, peanut butter and banana sandwiches fried. They're good. Yeah. You know it's really good. Peanut butter and bacon. Really? Peanut butter and bacon with honey. I've been doing, I've been running back peanut butter and honey recently. [24:01] Is it true Elvis died on the toilet? That's what they saying, but that's just a rude thing that I would say too. Yeah, he's a punk. He died on the toilet. That was the end of the cutoff. I already died on the toilet and it just gets around like that. Elvis is probably still alive when he said that. I don't know. Well, actually probably not. Do you think he- Do you think Elvis did the fake death? No, he's dead as fuck. Yeah, he's dead as fuck. You can't do pills forever. Yeah, but what a way at the end. I mean, there's a moment there where you're flying high and then you gotta be like, well, you either gotta wrap it up or just be like, what's this plan out? There's so many of his concerts where he's got pill sweat. Oh yeah. Like just pill sweat all over his face. Dump it. Pills wet. Just dump and sweat. Elvis Presley autopsy explains grotesque illness that caused him to die on toilet. Who's 43? He had constipation of everything. This today had a four month old stool. No, that's what he says. Oh, but doesn't, isn't that one of the things [25:00] that happens when people take like vikinins. Opiates, usually they have a hard time shitting on. Yeah, here, due to his high fat unhealthy diet, what about the pills? The jailhouse, suffered from chronic constipation. Are they doctors due to his high fat unhealthy diet? What about due to his pills? It's a sentence. I know, but that should be the, wow, like that's probably why he was constipated for fucking months. Unhealthy diet people, shit like racehorses. But they shit everywhere. Yeah, yeah. He must have been the amount of pills he was on that was stopping the shit and then making it damn in him for four months. So the rock singer anyway, I went off an attendant, suffered from chronic constipation and a post mortar examination examination found here a four month old compacted stool sitting in his bow. Oh my God. Can we talk about what came out? But imagine how much that dude was eating at four months worth of food. And banana peanut butter sandwiches. We didn't shit for four months. He just packed it in. [26:00] How could you not shit for four months? Because my initial thought is, I would do that, I think. This is just a challenge. No way. I had to ask him some times. No way. Not four months, but weeks. What? Or you would go weeks? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I've heard the story. It's gross. I got constipated two years ago, and it was one of the weeks I couldn't shit. Oh my God, and you're still eating? Oh, but you're also like, you have to poop. You like go and you have to poop, but it just doesn't show up. You just, dude, it was after I got. I had a friend who had to go to the doctor to get it pulled out. Oh. Yeah, my friend Larry, shout out to Larry. Yeah. I used to work with them on fear factor. Yeah, and he had to get pulled out his story the story Every time you tell the story I literally couldn't breathe Life is so hard I couldn't fucking breathe because he's funny anyway Yeah, he's telling the story and What when it got to the point where it's hard so they had to go in there and like break it up like dynamite out [27:01] They had to use tools like they had to just chip away at the cement shit marble It was stuck at the fucking base of his But all dude there was a moment where I I was at I was in Rochester working a weekend comedy at the Carlson great club Didn't shit all weekend Saturday. I was like emotionally going through it and I had Supositories and I was like do a sposter because I was like just do it. Just do it. And it didn't work. And I was like it was one of those moments where you go, why have you forsaken me God? I was like, do nothing, nothing. And then after the weekend, I went back to New York and my doctor was like, just drink Miralax. Just keep drinking Miralax. Like fuck what it says. Every time you think about it, have a couple of Miralax. And so I was just a tick and time ball. Oh my God. I was a tick and time ball. Hey, what on stage like that? Dude, I had to. And I was like, I had to go. And so I get through the weekend, fine. I get through the weekend, but the second I got back [28:07] to New York the next morning I woke up and was like, fucking around in my apartment and all the adrenaline had dumped from like the past two weeks. I sat down and took the most glorious shit. I took like a Jeff Daniels dumb and dumb or. Like my legs were fucking, it was unbelievable. It was almost worth the constipation for that dump Why is it so satisfying to look at a giant shit dude? It's dropping out of you. You're like It's really big. Yeah, oh my god. Would it snakes out? Yeah, I have to stop myself for To yell to my fiance Because I like there's times where I'm like, someone's got to see this. I would send me pictures. Oh, yeah. I mean, Ari will box up his poop. Like he did when he gave, PJ a box of poop on Skype. And said it was, he said it was an event, said it full album. And he like, it shit in a box. [29:00] He gave it the fucking thing. and he opened it in front of a crowd. Oh my god. Everybody was like Oh, it cleared the room. It was at the old creek in the Queens downstairs. It cleared the entire fucking room No, everyone's like that smells horrible He's the best Ari is one of those people where you're like and now he's you see he went viral with that sweet story about what he did for his girlfriend I did see that. I didn't read it though. It's just, you know, we both know Ari the person. We both know the very good side, a sweet man. A bench. He's one of my favorite people. I love him to death. He is truly a bench. He's a great guy. He united New York and LA comedy. He did. Single-handedly. Well, he went over there with the attitude that we all had at the store. Yeah, he's like, you guys should just meet these guys. You would like everybody. Yeah. Big J was the first person that he was like close with. And then through Big J and Ari, the healing started. But we started hanging out going to LA and everyone became friends. The New York versus LA comedy, like, feud was the dumbest thing of all time. [30:03] It made zero sense. You are literally giving power to all the industry Separating like that. It's so it would not only was it so dumb But it never made any sense because most of us started on the east coast Yeah, you know from Massachusetts Stand hopes from Worcester. Yeah, so many guys started in New York New York in 07 right when Burr left. And so it felt like ridiculous that people were like LA comics, you have a Burr just burst it. Like we knew people that were there. It was ridiculous. It was stupid. But it was a dumb thing. Like it just weren't communicating. So it was good, it was good. It was like the walled garden feel. Like you'd come to the store and there would be all the clicks and you'd have no who to hang out with, you know. It's all high school. It's always high school. High school just keeps repeating itself throughout your life. But you could have a cool group of friends in high school. Yeah. You know, and that's what I try to cultivate. Yeah, just people you want to hang with. Cool group of friends. I figured out long time ago on the road, and I was trying to explain this to Feme. [31:06] It's better to make less money on the road and then pay a guy who's good to open for you and pay for his hair and also tell him, so you make less money, but you'll have more fun. I, you have to have more fun. Fun is the whole thing. I'll add my friends who I like to watch because then I get to watch a show. Yes. I watch them in the middle and I go like, this is so fun. Yes. And you get to go on laughing. Yeah, like you're already laughing. Dan St. Germain's one of my best friends and he's a hilarious comic and I bring him on the road and he just does little stuff that I'm just like, dude, that's so fucking funny. He'll get off stage. I'll be like, that line is so funny. And I'll be like, oh thanks. When we filmed, because I'm, you know, put out my special on YouTube, Friday, March 1st. When we filmed that, I brought him, because I was like, let's just keep this like a weekend. We're just gonna film this like this is, because it was, I was just on the road. And I Helium, we'll just film it like it always is, and I got to bring my friend, and then it's just like a hang. [32:06] Yeah. It's like a fun hang that doesn't feel, because you know when you do special tapings, they can feel like everyone's like, are you gonna do it? Right. This is gonna be good. And you got like your managers there randomly. Yes. And it just friends come through That's just a show it was like oh, and then I'm like I'm just gonna put this up on YouTube for free And this is great and this is exactly what I do on the road Yeah, it was like a fun fucking hang and I think the club shows represent like a more intimate thing Which is what you're doing at home anyway if you're sitting in your living room? Yeah, I think there's a disconnect. Like if you watch, like, I've seen some guys do arena specials. Which is nuts because it's still great. Listen, arena shows are great. Arena shows are fun, dude. I went and saw Nate at fucking state farm in Atlanta. I'm not saying arena shows aren't fun. I love it. But here's the point I'm making is I went and saw Nate and live, it was an experience. It was like watching one man in front of all those people [33:06] just murder my friend, just being like, buddy, my wife, Ben, it's just like sending out waves. But at home, it was like minimal exertion, but maximal reward with the punchlines. If we were in the 40s, he would have had so many, he would have been a Hall of Fame sniper in the army, 40s, he would have had so many. He would have been a hall of fame sniper in the army. Just how calm he would have been and he would have been like seven degrees left. That's a great description. That would be like seven degrees right. I've never seen someone more calmly kill. It's incredible. Yeah. It's incredible. And by the way, the way he kills, his bits or stuff that are it's so organic and from who he is. Yeah. That like you're like, I've had multiple phone conversations with Nate multiple over the years where we have talked about something and then months later that conversation is a seven minute bit and it's just destroying the room. We had, because we all used to hang in New York like around 0708 at standup New York when Patrice [34:07] Patrice's manager Wayne Rada was booking it so it was like Patrice was there a tell big J and then Nate all these guys that I met Specifically Lewis J Gomez and all them are all from this time period so you would have Weird hangs like me Lewis and Nate Nate had a bit that he did on Conan about his friend trying to fight staff members at a McDonald's because he took a bite out of his burger. That was Nate Lewis and I because we took a bite out of Lewis's hamburger and wrap it back up. And this psycho came back in and was like, oh, what's up? It's not a walking at the McDonald's workers. And Nate never like, no, no, no, no, no. Dude, Nate was laughing so hard. He had to bail out of the McDonald's and I had to get in front of Lewis and be like, it was us, it was us. And then six months later, Nate's on Conan, murdering with a bit about it. Dude, I bought a cheeseburger once from Burger King and it had a bite taken out of it. That is a act of war. If it's not your friend, it's an act of war. [35:07] I was driving home from training and I got a picture. What a bad guy to pick. A guy coming home from training? I was so sad. Yeah, I mean, you have to throw it. I was so hungry, I ate it. Did you bite around it? Yeah, I was so poor. I needed the food. When I was a waiter, that's what I would do when someone worked in Midtown and they would like throw out this steak. We had a steak like a, and it was a, in little slices all the way down and I would see how much they would eat and then I would just go on over and be like, that's mine. I'd just put that in there and be like, and I got some steak. That's always the way to do it. you're poor when you're that poor you're like I'll eat around it. Yeah, I just ate it I was so hungry And I didn't know what to do I didn't let's go and tell them so I took a bite out of my burger I have to get home. I'm tired was that I'll just eat it because I'm saying they picked the wrong guy You pick me who do you smoke the bowl? [36:00] I don't know. I'm gonna do going and karate kick people. Yes I don't know what I'm gonna do going and karate kick people. Yes. Yes. No. I wasn't that type of guy. Dude, you could be like Show enough in the last dragon and go fuck up When I say You could pick the wrong guy to do that too though That could pick a guy who just found out that his wife's been fucking his best friend And she stole a hundred thousand dollars from his bank account and his boss just fired him and his wife's been fucking his best friend and she stole $100,000 from his bank account and his boss just fired him and then he is in a fucking rage. And he gets a cheeseburger and it's got a bite taken out of it. And it's like, oh, okay, motherfucker. And then you pull in with that cheeseburger and just start laying people out. Yeah, you're describing out there. You're describing what's gonna happen to all these YouTube pranksters. Some of them are bringing big giant security guards with them. Well, that's their thing now, because there was a story about a guy, one of these pranksters that got shot. He got shot in the stomach. [37:00] Oh, I saw that. And then an article came out with interview with his dad Shining stomach by an illegal immigrant by the way Yeah, but still a prank So quick to pull guns. I mean where's he from fuck around with I mean he ran from something You know that that guy ran from something more dangerous than him. Yeah, maybe jail I mean yeah, there's like some guys some jail. Some of these people are like, dude, you don't want to fuck, it's again, the wrong guy. You pick the wrong guy. Yeah, you pick the wrong guy. You pick the wrong guy, fucking pull his pants down. Just shot him in the gut. Dude, they were old pranks. People used to, because this is common waves. Vine days, people were doing pranks. Yes. And they were depancing like black dudes, just walking up and depancing black guys like in the hood and being like no, no, no, no, and the second day would like get swarmed on, they'd like, no, no, it's a prank. And there's one where a guy does it and you hear that gun hit the street and that prankster's like, no, no, no, no, and the guy like picks up the gun and you're like dude, when did you you could have been dead? You could have been dead a hundred percent. It's and by the way the the security guards are just gonna make it worse [38:10] Because then you're gonna get a guy Maybe you have a guy that can fucking handle himself and he's not scared of your security and now there's two people get I get shot first exactly Yeah, and you're like dude, that's crazy man This is what people will do for attention. It's just nuts. But that's what, that's alien, dude, it's alien weaponry. You might be onto something. They're coming from under the sea. And they're giving us weapons. I'm all about USOs and I was dude. Yeah, I'm all about. Under sea, UFOs. It's an unidentified submersible objects. Yeah. Yeah, that's where they are dude. Yeah, they're at the floor of the cat way I'm said Yeah We were talking about sonar hearing the vice Heart, where I'm like, yeah, do we both have the same crazy theory? You said is this correct or incorrect? Love that we were talking about space about how we know more about space than we do about the ocean [39:02] Which is true and he was saying that those underwater listening devices were most likely so that they could hear UFOs moving around. Dude. Because if they're really, I imagine they're really on bases under the ocean and they know about them. Well, here's the thing that if they know about them, fuck you, you should tell us. But here's what I think. The theory I heard, because I heard about, I listened to an episode of last podcast on the left where they were talking about USOs and I got super into it, because I was high enough, you know, when the song hits correctly, sometimes the podcast will do that. And I was listening to the last podcast on the left and it hit where I go like, it unlocked because they had this theory that they talked about that the millions of years it took us to crawl out of the water and evolve into fucking li- you know whatever we are, like monkeys and then- and or thaws and then humans. All that millions of years, there were things under the ocean evolving for millions of years with technology and stuff and we're just up on the roof. [40:02] But yeah, the problem is we've never seen anything other than us that manipulates its environment. The intelligent things that we found in the ocean that are real are dolphins and orcas. And whales, but like dolphins and orcas are crazy. But like octopus is too, right? That's true too. But none of them, the octopus are very smart. But none of them have ever figured out how to make things, like make houses and cars and ships. And it's all, they're out in the wild. There's no houses. I used to do a bit about how dangerous the ocean is because there's no doors. I'm like there's no doors. No matter what, it's just fucking sharks and crabs and no doors and everywhere you look, everything is eating everything It's literal murder soup because they all eat each other. It's a ladder of eating Yeah, just everything goes up and eat something at the top you have killer whales that are eating whales They eat everything, but what if we're [41:00] Missing something what if we don't see it what if we are too stupid What if we're just like rock monkeys and they're just like they can't see down here? These guys have no fucking clue. You know when you're an attented car and someone's like Like looking in the window and you're looking at him like look at this fucking idiot. You don't even see me mate. What if that's Us with the aliens in the water. What if we're like looking down there in the water and they're like, these fucking idiots? Even when they come down here, they can't see shit. That's possible. It's possible that they also can be completely invisible. We're really close to being able to do that now with stuff. They figured out how to like project what's behind things on screens. So you can like have theoretically, have a vehicle that has its moving through an environment. It's projecting what's there That's a predator shit. Yeah, like literally that's that's a concept that they're working on They're working on for aircrafts. They're working on it for for vehicles [42:02] Terrified. Yeah, so they're. And that's just step one. Step two would be do something that alters reality around the thing so it's invisible. Yeah. It like, So that's right. So you go into the ocean and we're like down there and we're so limited because we can't breathe down there. So we're limited. We're in like submarines or we have robots and it's just like a. It's just like a fucking ring Every footage under the sea looks like a ring doorbell where it's just like And we don't know what the fuck they could be behind it like these idiots There's so little of it that we've explored. There's only like 10% of the ocean floor that we've explored 10% That's so crazy 10% and then the thing that they always see you UFOs or usos over water It's like the high frequency that they see them and then they just fucking just down in there and they're like follow me bitch We're like we can't we can't breathe you know space or the ocean. We can't breathe down there We have a limited amount of room we can move around in [43:01] Just the idea of something being here the whole time is so creepy. Yeah, yeah. And then, but us being what's comforting is, we're all so stupid we don't see it. Right. Imagine if you had a friend that's like, hey, if you're a couple people could see it, you would be terrified. Imagine if society had gotten to a point, at one point in time Where artificial intelligence and human brains mixed and we created a super class of Species like a new thing that's both technological and biological yeah and only a small number of beings got that I mean you you. And those beings, for some reason, left and left us here the way we are. Yeah, that's what we're seeing with these aliens. Those are humans that went down the road that we're going down right now. And they were like, dude, we're gonna get out of here. [44:02] Yeah, and then maybe there was like all the disasters that happened, like the younger dry is impact, the asteroids hit, all that stuff in level society, but they escape, because they're interdimensional travelers. Yeah, they're like, we're gonna get the fuck out of here. It's like leaving a house. You're just like, I don't care about the house anymore. Yeah, somewhere else. They like anti-matter. Yeah, they'd take a thing that we would never even think of. Yeah, they don't need to breed. The thing that I read, the Jimmy Carter brief, did you know about this when he, were they briefed them in it like broke them emotionally, where he was like so upset where they were like, hey, by the way, they've been here forever. I'd like to. He was like a deeply religious man. Well, Tucker Carlson's talked about this recently. Really? Yeah, Tucker Carlson said that he believes that they've always been here and he believes that it's probably, he's talking about good and evil. And we all, we know that good exists and we know that evil exists. Sure. We know that people are capable of doing evil. [45:00] Like, these are real forces in the world. Yeah. So these are real forces in the world. And what people are saying is that these experiences, some people having with like benevolent ones, that this is the stories of demons. This is the stories of the Bible, that there's races that are evil. There's alien races that don't give a fuck, just like that. Just praying mantises. Yeah, eat hummingbirds. Like in nature. Just because they're super silent. There are creatures that are aggressive, that are smart like a hyena. And then there's like animals that are aggressive and just powerful like lions. Like think about us. The smartest animal on the planet that we know of and what do we do to chickens? Fuck them. No. No, those chicken I go no, you don't fuck This is how my whole world unravels I go Joe I fuck chickens dude. I don't know I didn't think you're gonna get me like that, but yeah, you there could be the the idea of benevolent aliens of like The idea that there's our aliens that are good and aliens that are bad. Yeah, skiers me so much more [46:02] Because you're just like please leave me alone like good ones bail me out of it. I mean, but imagine like if something became super intelligent but in a more balanced environment like instead of the way humans are so much more intelligent than everything else. Yeah. What if there was other shit around that was pretty close to us? So you're saying like what if the food chain the gap wasn't as big between one and two? Right. Would we ever that would be a lot nicer to each other? Right. But would we ever get to this point? That's the thing. I think if it did, it would be a slower roll, but I also believe that community and empathy would be higher if we had less of us more more of a threat more threat if there were if there was like I tried this as a bit, but it never worked if dolphins had legs like if they just came out cause they rape and if dolphins came out and just on land and you'd be like cause they're so they're all muscle. [47:02] Yeah. So they would just fuck our shit up. Oh, they'd kill you. Yeah. A dolphin that could breathe. Yeah. Oh, yeah, in trouble. Yeah, we're absolutely fucked. They're in trouble. Imagine a little bit of a big- But if you'd be so pro-dolphin, but dolphins evolve legs, they just become the worst rapist to come to the planet. And they're like, what were you wearing? And Just everything. Yeah, fuck. They rate your car. Yeah, I got super intelligent. They just fuck everything they find. I think my ultimate got fucked by a dolphin and a movie late to work. They, your e-muse laid out. They're fucking garage. They're just like a tornado of rape. It's just coming through and fucking it down. They also commit in phantracide. What's that? They kill babies? So those Chinese and I don't think they call it a native law. What do they call it? In fact, our site is like large-scale killing of children I think I think I might have exaggerated that but I think What they do is when female dolphins have babies apparently they they won't breed for a long period of time while they're raising that baby sure [48:01] They're being good moms and what male dolphins would do if they have not had sex with the female dolphin hope not fucking this up they'll kill the babies to fuck the mom force the mom into breeding again for back into asterisk that's a trailer trash is strategy that the female dolphins have employed is to have sex with as many male dolphins around her as she can so that no one knows who's the baby. Yeah, so everyone's like that might be my kid. Exactly. Genius. That's a part of it. That's a part of it. That's a part of it. That's a part of it. That's a part of it. That's a part of it. That's a part of it. That's a part of it. That's a part of it. That's including multiple populations of common bottle nose dolphins. Damn. Yeah. So if you're a grown dolphin, you've made it through a lot. You made it through a lot. You made it through a lot of dolphins wanting to fuck your mom while you were a kid. If you can't make a house, the world is rough. Do you know how different I would have been? [49:01] I was raised by a single mom who dated. If all those guys had to kill me to fuck my mom. Oh my god. Do you know how dangerous I would be right now? Oh my god. I would be dead. I would be dead. I would be dead. I would have been dead. I was also a little sweetie pie. Oh my god. I was a Kevin McAllister. I'm not setting after my dad. Dennis would have killed me. Yeah, probably. Yeah, because he would have been like, wait, are you not gonna fuck when this kids around? And she's like, he's not gonna see you. I'm just coming up 100%. You're a piano wire? Like, yeah. I think for dolphins, it's like six years too. That That's that times out exactly how old I was I was maybe five of them. I'm sorry to dating that's so funny to think about them. I have to be like my mom's like I'm going on a date. It's the whole day of the cycle. Where the fuck is he? Come get me you son of a bitch. How where does it we put those things in swimming pools and pet them in right-amid shit. Yeah just tricks. Do a trick. I went to the Atlanta aquarium. [50:07] They have a great aquarium and I was doing shows there and I went to the dolphin exhibit. And I thought it was funny because these dolphin trainers are also scientists. Yeah. But then they have to dance. It's like the weirdest thing though. They know all this stuff about dolphins, but then they're like, hey, do a little routine and feed them a fish. And you're like, how disrespected are you as a scientist that they're like, and fucking twirl around a little bit. Yeah, you know. And making these incredibly intelligent wild beasts of the sea, do these dance? I'm surprised they don't snap all the time. Yeah. Do they kill a lot of trainers? Killer whales do. They've killed a few. Yeah, that's when they bring them down. They bring them down. They kept using them because they're so valuable. A male killer whale. So he killed someone and they kept them around. Who's the guy that's next up on that? Oh, who's the guy that they're like? I think they sold them to another place. because no one working there will be like. Yeah. Whatever happened with that one, there was one in SeaWorld. [51:07] So the four fatal attacks by Orcas and captivity, Tillicum was involved in three. And he's the... He killed three people. He's the one from Blackfish, right? Yeah, he probably killed three people. Damn, he's got three bodies on him. Why wasn't Tillicum put down? Uh, Brent Cho's family and animal rights activists say you do not want to see Tila come killed. Brandt, how do you say that name? Brent Cho, Brent Cho, Brent Cho, Brent Cho's sister Diane Gross told the Associated Press that the trainer loved the animals like they were her children. It would not want anything done to that whale, even though it killed her. Yeah. Yeah. Get over it lady. The things uh things murdering people. Yeah just it killed your kid. If you're the family members of one of those people that I will killed like first of all you [52:01] should really let it go. You're're you're holding it in captivity against its will and it's a super intelligent Like behemoth of the sea. I thought I had a long infection Damn it went down with emphysema where did it where they take it they moved it somewhere after killed three people Just imagine working at that fucking place and you go who do we get is the killer weather that's killed three people. We got Taylor. We got Taylor to Orlando move to Victoria, British Columbia and then back to Orlando. Wow. Damn. He's a long trip. He sired 21 calves throughout his life. So that's what I want him for. He's come. They want his jizz. Yeah, he's one of his hot orca whales. Because you're not allowed to capture them anymore. Yeah, wasn't it that show whale hunters all about that? Just like, I don't know it into it. Oh, dude, it was wild. It was on discovery, I think, and there was just these guys going out there and they were trying to stop people from whale hunting. So they just like smash into their boats and shit. [53:06] Isn't it crazy that they're saying you're not allowed to go capture them. Okay, everybody would agree that's a good thing, right? Sure. But you're allowed to keep them and make them breed and make you more of them. Just like saying, no more slavery, except for the slaves you have. And if they, and you can have kids with them and those count. But no new slaves. But no new ones. That's almost like saying. You can't go buy a new one, but you can keep the one you have right now and force it to breed. Like if they are as intelligent as us, but they just can't manipulate their environment, it's very similar. It's not a human being obviously, so we don't respect it and treat it the same way as we treat ourselves. But imagine if it was a human being in the same role that would be insane if there was a human being that had a living in a swimming pool and And do tricks and and feet if like if it's as smart as a human being. Yeah You're going saying they don't know how smart they are they really don't know So you think they just feel crazy the whole time 100% just out of their fucking mind nuts [54:01] How come I have to dance to feed to eat and you're trapped in this swimming pool? Yeah. Yeah. Where's the ocean? But it'd just be like us in a room, like a pretty big room that you could run around in. And some of them are born in captivity. When this one was captured at two years old, it was put into one tank in Iceland, and that was transferred. And when it was transferred to said by two older female. Oh Wow I says forced him into a smaller pool. That is crazy. Get out of here Yeah, he's like I go to the medical pool. Wow the trainers had to keep him and the other pool for protection So it's probably isolated just like a person it becomes a serial killer. Yeah abused isolated. Yeah, no wonder he's killing people Yeah, because he's trying to he's flailing to get out. He doesn't want to live like that. He ain't fucking asshole. So that's why he grabs a lady that's like, I think we can get him up here, but that energy of them getting like kill, right before he goes. Shut the fuck up. He goes, I think we'll come up and you just feel that like, that pull, that like animal strength of an oracle way, [55:07] that has to be the most terrifying way to die because you are drowning, which is horrible. But number two, you're being forced down by a thing that's the size of a building. Yeah. Oh, not that big, but like, it's the size of a Mack truck and it's fucking holding you down at the bottom of a pool. And you're just like, and you're just trapped in its teeth. Yeah, and it's so, but obviously doesn't give a fuck about you. But it's holding you in a way that you're like, well, this is it. Rescue attempts were thwarted by the whales, refused to let burn go even after she was believed to have fallen unconscious in the water. Her corpse was later retrieved of the large net after which she was determined to be deceased. Her death was ruled an accident. It's murder. That was murder. That was the whales who were like, they were keeping her there? They were high-fiving after. They were stopping the rescue attacks. Yeah. They kept each other up. They wanted her death. After they were like, we got her. They wanted her dead. Yeah, that's so crazy. They're so smart man. Well, also was she the head trainer [56:08] The lady that got killed well, she was only 20 and then I'm reading in the second one This is a this the second was a guy's out. They call him a vagrant snuck into the pool Which by the way until it can kill him. Yeah, by the way You you sneak into that is the ace of intero moment where he's like here snowflake Here snowflake here snowflake I'm on tillicum side that guy that guy fuck you. Yeah, that's on you That's him but I'm on tillicum side like what are you doing? Why are we still allowing that that's so crazy that after if anybody's watched that movie that or come movie What is it called black fin?, what is it? Blackfish? Blackfish. I thought you were gonna say free willy. I was gonna go, I know, in the soundtrack. Blackfish or have watched any of the documentaries, any of the YouTube videos that you could see about Orca's in captivity. It's crazy that that's legal. Yeah. It's torture. Yeah, you're taking a thing that they're just like do anything. It's a prisoner. It's a prisoner for life. It's also giant [57:05] It needs space. Yeah, it means I can't imagine feeling guilt-free owning that place. It's literally like you being stuck in this room for the rest of your life. And then I come out and I do a sick routine And you give me like cheeseburgers and I come back in here and I go like That new Batman bit's really hitting. Yeah, I imagine. I'm just stuffed my face and then finally I've just had enough of it. After years, years of daily of just that. And by the way, absolute abuse because I'm sure orcas, they're smart enough that they don't always listen to commands. Like anything with intelligence, it's not 100% gonna listen to commands. It's gotta think and sometimes it doubts and sometimes like, and then they probably were like abusing it. The fact that they killed her and that the other whales did look out like a fucking prison hit, I would be like, yeah, I don't wanna speak out there, but if I was her family. [58:01] I'm going back to Shamu, because I was like, why did they call him all Shamu? Yeah. The first one, not the first, but it was one of the first ones was called Shamu. And this one had an incident too. It didn't though, the woman didn't die. But. Which she bit the legs and hips of Vanette Echis, a sea-world employee who was told to ride her as part of a film publicity event. Xiaomi refused to release the woman till other workers came to the rescue and pride the Orcas jaws apart with a pole. Oh! Oh my God! Oh my God! She died four months later. Or the way, or not the woman. Yeah. Oh, she's only conditioned to perform with trainers wearing wetsuits. So the problem was this girl got on with wearing a bikini He's by the way it was 71 so they were absolutely doing that like why don't you give him a sexy ride a sexy ride on Shamu Shamu loves sexy ladies and then Shamu was like I am a devout Muslim [59:02] Get either get up her gone. That's I mean do like skin. Yeah, get a berk on. That's, I mean, do you like skin? Yeah. Get your dirty vagina off of me. Yeah, you fucking weird rock monkeys touching me with your fucking land skin. You got your feet on me. Your dry skin. She was only trained to do it with people wearing wetsuits. Yeah. So she had previously attacked people in bikinis before. And if you're like, if you're one of those guys that like is running that park and you're all sexed up on cocaine on good 70s cocaine and you're like, yeah, baby, you could run shimu. And I don't know like, I don't think you should put her on there. No, no, no, it's a sexy ride. She loves sexy rides. And it's like, he pulls up and it's trans-am. Yeah, you can ride the whales. Because back in the 70s, they didn't give a fuck about animals. They didn't give a fuck. 70s and 80s? Dude, one of my- Her coat's, bro. Dude, Milo and Otis, there's a movie called Milo and Otis in the 80s and 90s. What is it? It's a movie about a puppy and a dog that love each other, right? [1:00:07] My favorite episode of Legion of Skanks Hever I wasn't even on it. Lewis J. Gomez talks about it, gets teared up because he loves the movie so much. I think he's drunk on the podcast. It's like, if you watched in your childhood, it sticks with you. It's a movie about a dog and a cat that, from 86. And it's like, yeah, it's about a pug in this cat and their friends and they just go on a wild adventure through Wherever they're going through, right? Okay, and you're like as part of my childhood it's live action I remember this being like dude. This is such a sweet movie You look up the animal abuse that occurred on this movie and I can't even watch this because it upsets me knowing There's I think you can look it up that occurred on this movie. And I can't even watch this, because it upsets me knowing, there's, I think you can look it up. There was a scene involving a cat where they killed like 12 of them to get this scene done, because I think it was filmed in a country with like no animal rights, like no at all. And they were just like, that scene, [1:01:00] that was the scene where the cats and the, I think they lost like a bunch of cats. Oh my god They had to make them walk with a limp and they were just breaking his leg. Oh, that's what I mean You read about it and you're like oh my god Once they did that episode on skanks and then I read about it because I like was listening to the episode playing video games And I was like I gotta look this up. It fucked me up. I like can't oh My god, it's the animal welfare allegations. Yeah. Um, okay, yeah, they probably aren't going into the details, but you can find the details online, but they were like, because you see it and you're like, oh, look at that. An animal and a cat friends. Well, isn't that like the idea of like, if you ran like a billionaire pedophile business. Sure. All right, I'm with you. You did it through an animation company. Oh, is that kind of like that? Well, the Nickelodeon thing, where that guy got busted, that guy, [1:02:01] Jay and I talked it on the bonfire before I left, but this guy at Nickelodeon did all, he was like, on, remember the show head of the class? He was, I don't remember. Yeah, this guy named his name's Dan Sumpkin, and he was a higher up at Nickelodeon, and it found out that he was just like, like wildly abusing everyone, like feet pictures. Dude, his pool at his house this guy d'Anshen Eider this guy his pool at his house is a foot and he was accused of having like a crazy foot finish if you have a crazy foot finish don't make your pool of foot whoa yeah invest yeah there's a series that's what it is I learned all my shit from bad documents the promise if you get busted for something like that you you look like that, everyone's gonna believe you did it. Yeah, but you got pedophile face like a mother fucker. He's got that face, like, yeah, some deviant shit. You know who else had that? Was the guy that did all the boy bands in Orlando, Lou, what was his name? Lou Perlman. Lou Perlman, you just like, yeah, you abused kids kids like you see a picture of them brother best ones Jimmy Savile. Oh my god [1:03:07] Dude that yeah look at that. Oh, yeah, look at him. Just a bunch of hot boys screaming like they're all having a good time He's like yeah, he's just not oh my god He looks like a Philip Seymour Hoffman or a fat suit and played an evil guy. It was on worse heroin You fuse on me Look at him. Oh my god. But Jimmy Savile was like... The creepiest looking creep of all time. By the way, he did shit that was like in the documentary. I don't even know if they brought it up. Like he would like fuck with kids that were dying like on the step of death maybe even past. Oh my god, that is the evil. He looks like a demon and also who wears a mess shirt like that when you're all old and got turkey skin a freak a sexual freak and he had his own supply of kids. Yeah sexually abusing these kids and these kids are like dude I'm dying I got fucking leukemia and I got a [1:04:00] fuck this weird looking dude. But yeah imagine that other that other people knew. Yeah. And they protected it. That's the worst part. There's no way no one knew that he was fucking kids. No, it's like the Sandusky thing in Penn State where there were people that were like kind of found out about it and then were scared that if they said anything, they'd lose their job. And then you're like, well, yeah, that's where the power comes in. It's not necessarily a clean and cut thing morality was. I mean, obviously it is. I think you say, if you see something you say, but like those people, kind of who are next to that kind of power, well, they have that thing in them that they want to be close to that power. They have that like thirst to be close to that power. So they're not going to say anything because if they say anything, to be close to that power. So they're not gonna say anything because if they say anything they're kicked out of the party And they don't want to get you know within reality Guys like him should be hunted for sport. Yeah by People and then you put that on cable. Yeah, and I watch that and you get really rich Yeah, you get really rich I'm gonna you bad people. Yeah, and you go like I want to teach him. He said we'll get, imagine if we did have the ability to film things in HD from the sky [1:05:08] Where you never interacted you could do the entire show it's come it's common and it's Jimmy Savo gets let loose and one of those kids is 18 now. Oh, yes, Bayley got a bad laugh And it's it's him and his dad so it's like a bonding experience Yeah, yeah, or you get the guy Larry Nesser, Nasser, from Michigan State. I just watched that video of the dad trying to attack him in court. That'll fire you up when you see a dad be like, can I get a minute with him and the judge is like, you know, I can't do that. It's just that like the move and then he try. He gets like this guy. Yeah. And Yeah, this and it's completely understandable Larry nasters a piece of shit. What happened to that guy? Did he get in trouble? Yeah, this is a By the way shout out his daughters for being proud the entire time of him They don't ever break they watch it and they're like thanks that [1:06:01] He just wanted to get his hands on Larry naster that he just wanted to get his hands on Larry and Assar. That's probably like one recently, the guy jumped across and got the judge. That's why that one's wild. That one's some air. Yeah, do that one. That guy got a full, fucking jump man. That was a full, Goldberg spear in the air. That was not instantaneous. He was preparing for that. Did you know there's no way? Did he go like? Do you think he did like a test? No, he just went for it, man. It was so fast. There's a moment where you wonder if he goes like this. It was so fast. Watch how fast he moves. Here he is. He went with the losses, Dan, that was quick. Oh, Oh, Yeah. Oh, Gets her too. Yeah. You know what? You know what? Whatever prison, whatever prison he gets put in, you're hoping there's a longest yard situation where you can use this guy on the field. Yeah, I think he's gonna go in and be like, can you got her too? Because he got, it was an arm tackle, he got her. Did you see what they did to him though? The next time they brought him in? Yeah, they like muzzle them and kept them like a Hannibal Lecter. Like Hannibal Lecter. Yeah, show how they brought him in the second time. [1:07:06] Look at how they brought him in. Which you should have entrance music like a fighter. Look at this guy. Look at that. They gave him a net. They put his chain, his hands are in bags. He can't use his fingers. He's handcuffed and shackled. And they got seven guys around him. Yeah. Wild, man. Look at his eyes. Fuck. But you know what, you hear that thing. I imagine being him right now. But you hear that thing where the judge goes like, because from what I read, he was prepared to get like, perold, I think. That's where he was in his head. And the judge is like, no, no, no, no, no, you're staying for like five more years and he's like fuck that shit like that is such an instantaneous like Fuck this what yeah, like I don't know what he did I don't know what you know what situation was but in that moment of being told like Na na na you're He had just been doing a speech I remember hearing it [1:08:01] He said like he had not been committing crimes anymore. He is rehabilitated and I remember hearing that he said like he had not been committing crimes anymore. He is rehabilitated and Dead that she's like no, I don't think she then did the moon she did the campaign with Tom Bowen. She's like no No, no, no, no, no, what was he being tried for like what was he there for? That Battery no way not that guy I don't have an aggressive bone in his body. Dude, but by the way, that is a fucking hell of a defense. Battery on a protected, oh, that's the one we got for the. Oh, that's what he got for the judge. For jumping it though. Well, they hit him with a book. Yeah. They hit him with so many charges and it's a viral video. They have to put a stop. Yeah, it's like Streakers right like they're like they don't show them on TV right and then they when they do catch them They're like we got to hit you with something we got to hit you something big I was at the Super Bowl and they ran in the streeters that got there Do you see the one guy bet on himself? Yeah [1:09:06] That's immediately when I said to Che when we were at the game, I was like, dude, those guys put a bet down that they would do this, and they're gonna make a lot of money off this. That's pretty wild. Because why not? I bet there'll be a streaker in the third quarter, and then you're like, I can affect that. That's pretty wild. My favorite's that all these betting sites now allow wrestling as a lifelong wrestling fan, I'm like like come on guys. That's hilarious. This is crazy. Like you're watching Monday Night Raw and they're like, Monday Night Raw, Draft Kings. You're like, this is fake. This is, he's pretty determined. That was that legal. Do you guys try to ruin gambling forever? Dude, also, what's next? You're gonna bet on fast and furious movies? Yeah. I bet Vin hits Nas in the first fucking hour of the movie. He's like, this is fucking wild. You're watching, you're gonna bet on plays on Broadway plays, or you're like, you know, funny girl. I bet she has a problem at the end of Act One. It's fucking ridiculous. It's so stupid. And I love wrestling, but I would never be like, finally. [1:10:00] My favorite thing was coming up with gambling for my friends when we watched the Royal Rumble. Like, you put money in a pot and then you get numbers and then that's your guy. But not like going on a app, putting down like a thousand bucks, fuck that. Well, I think guys get super addicted to that too. It's gambling. Yeah, it's a hundred percent gambling. You ask people that went to gambling, gamblers anonymous, like people that have been through the program, through that, and they'll be like, fuck heroin. Well, they say it does the most damage. It does the most damage out of all the addictions. Heroin is a set price. There's no set price with gambling. And by the way, the more you go up, the higher the high and lower the low. So you're doing big, big bets. You're gonna, if you get fucked, you're fucked. Sure, if you win, it's amazing. But then all you do is you just wanna go do it again. People don't walk away. It's like dealing drugs. People never walk away from that shit. They never win. The house always wins. They're gonna take your money. [1:11:01] Always. Always. They're not. They have the smartest. Did I had a buddy when I first moved out east? I lived with my buddy Morgan in New Jersey and he loved, he loved the taste. And this is like when you had to go to a bookie and shit. So he was like doing some real gambling. He would get so fucking into it. But then he was right. He would yell this thing all the time when he would bet on the points and the points would hit to was right. He would yell this thing all the time when he would bet on the points and the points would hit to fuck him. He would be like, they're from the future, they're from the fucking future. He would like scream, if he lost like a thousand dollar bet on the mix, and you're like, yeah, they have the smartest guys working for them. Like they know how to set the line, like all those guys are fucking crazy smart. They're crazy smart and they use analytics. Exactly. You're going to you're going against Wall Street. Yeah, you're going against guys that probably could be making millions on Wall Street. Yeah. And you're just like, yeah, I think the chiefs are going to win. Do the worst was gambling is got it was in Vegas. So, you know, obviously there's more gambling, but the Super Bowl. [1:12:06] If your team's in the Super Bowl, you fucking care. But I've been to two Super Bowls and what I've learned is there's a lot of people there that don't give a shit. They just wanna go to a Super Bowl. They're just at a Super Bowl. They don't care who the teams are. As someone who does care who the team is, it's a different viewing experience. Right. So the fourth quarter of the Niners Chiefs game, I'm a diehard Niners fan. I am like sweating. I'm like, Che and I are like punching each other in weird ways. Like we're just like, we're just like this the whole time. We're like holding hands. It's always fucking nuts. These fucking guys in front of us, we're just these like business CEOs from North Carolina. And as they got drunk, they like, they noticed Che, because you know, he's on SNL, so they like know a famous guy. So they kind of were doing that thing where they wanted to talk to us, but we were like, dude, it's a fucking Super Bowl. Like we're watching the Super Bowl. This is big for us. We're 49ers fans. Can we watch this? [1:13:01] And by the fourth quarter of the guy goes, yeah, I've got a part lay if Brandon and I you can get two more catches and I just put my hand in front of his face and I went, what do you, no, I don't want to talk to you, right? He's like, he was turned around talking to me and you're like, star. Because he thinks I care about his bets. You're like, dude, I love this team. We are almost at the mountaintop. Shut the fuck up. Right. About. It's like having a party over your house. And it's just the wrong person shows up. It just camps out in front of you and starts talking to you. And you're like, do you not understand? No. And I give too much of a shit about the 49ers because it was the only thing my dad and I shared. So I give like that extra. Oh, extra. Extra like this is connected and Boston with the red socks. It's like yeah, it is it's an identity It's a disease more than it is an enjoyment. It's like a thing like I see that logo and I'm like, what's fucking going on? I just fucking care so much and That's hilarious. They played last season. They played the Eagles in the NFC championship game and all my friends are from Philly [1:14:03] and they played the Eagles in the NFC Championship game. And all my friends are from Philly. Like a lot of my comedy friends are Eagles fans. Big J, Vecchion, F***in Shane, Tommy. Like there's so many guys I know that love the Eagles, specifically Big J. And Big J's like, dude, I'm having a party. Come over and watch it. And I was like, no, I care way too much. I care way too much. And it was just him, Eagles fans, and then friends that didn't give a shit. And that's what I said. I was like, I know there's gonna be one person that talks to me that I'm like, please don't talk to me right now. But also, I'm the enemy over there. So then I watched it at home I just went like crazy like an oracle whale. It's like screaming at a TV by myself. I do that if I watch fights. Yeah. Yeah, if I watch a good UFC at home, I'm screaming. Yeah, because you... Especially if I shut the door. Oh my god. It's pure enjoyment. It's like, yeah. It's the sports viewing equivalent of walking around your hotel now. Yeah, it's unbelievable And if you if you're live in your screaming. It just seems normal [1:15:07] But you want one other person there you want a person all I had was my dog and she didn't understand why you're yelling Why I was so fucking hyped up and when Brock Perty's elbow got injured She just saw me spiral in a wet. You know what dogs can tell your eggs just or whatever whatever? She's just like slamming her body into my leg and shaking and I'm like, no, no, it's all right. It's all right. We're fucking still in this thing. My dog is so sweet that he freaks out when there's violence in movies. Oh, really? We're watching movies together. We're watching this new Netflix show. What is this new Netflix show? It's a Korean series about about people that get infected and they become monsters. I don't know if that's the one called sweet home or something like that. Sounds bad ass. It's fucking great. It sounds. It's a fun show. Fun show. But there's some violent moments where the monsters get people. And the dog is like, what the fuck is going on? He gets up and he starts spinning around. [1:16:01] That's the dog sweet home. Dude, that is fun show show man. Dogs having anxiety about stuff that I don't understand. You got a toy. He's like bringing the toy to me. I'm like, dude it's not real man. It's not real. Dude my dog whenever a dog comes on the screen because she's big. She's like, what the fuck? Like someone's in her house. Like we'll just be chilling there and then she'll try to like, Shane came over and was hanging out. It was the first time you met Mertle. And I think my dog was like trying to impress him. Because most of the time she'll look up and be like, nah, nah, and you're like, shut the fuck up. But this one, she was like, ooh, like, random to the TV. We're like, you're not big. Stop acting big. Is that dog within Also, she only barks at cute dogs. If it's like a hell-hound or something, she's like, nah, I'm good. It's just completely fast. She's like, nah, I'm not fucking around. The first time Marshall saw the American world and London, he barked at it. Yeah, oh, in there? Yeah, that thing, if you're a dog, that has to be terrifying. Yeah, he saw it, he knows it's not real all right But that first time he's like first time he's like whoa and he hardly ever barks. Does Carl is part of his first barks ever [1:17:11] I think Carl saw it was like what the fuck you make noise Hey cool, dude That is great. You have a dog that you don't know if it barks or not Marshall never barks He'll he'll bark if he wants come inside, like if someone leaves him outside for a bit, and he comes to the door, he'll bark. He'll like one bark. Now we, like mom. Yeah, no, we didn't get it. Someone's here. Yeah, dad. We wrote it. We were like, because we got her during the pandemic, so everyone was inside in New York, and so we're like, don't bark we live in an apartment shut the fuck up and then hilariously Katie and I left the dog with her parents in Boston. Oh, no, we came back The dogs barking And her mom rules and her mom just in a box and accident goes she backs now Well, no, I don't think we want that we still we've tried hard not to do that [1:18:01] And now she'll just like she'll pop off for random shit. Like people in the hallway. Oh, no. Cause we live in a big building. So someone will be out in the hallway and she's like, huh, and just that. And then it's the little grumbles. But remember, remember, remember. Oh, fine. God damn it, dude. I'm so jealous you can go everywhere with Carl. I wish I could bring my fat little bitch everywhere with you. Yeah, Carl could go anywhere. Carl just sitting your lab. Yeah, Carl's just like, especially if you time it right. Oh, Jamie, you get to get so evil if you want to and then you just have like a dog where like, that is correct. Yeah, man, I fucking have an adog was the greatest thing about the pandemic. It was we got a dog and it has made my life. It just rules Dogs are amazing. It just absolutely rules. They're amazing. I had one growing up and then I just didn't forever. And I was always like, no, I loved seeing dogs, but then having one, you're like, you know what's really funny? I always try to attribute human thought to the dog sometimes. Like I'm like, one of these days is gonna get bored [1:19:01] chasing this ball. Nope. There's not a chance in hell. Every time I have one of those, it's like a stick with a scoop on the end of it that the ball goes. Oh yeah, you get the highlight of it. You can really put it in. Yeah, you highlight the shit out of it. You got a fucking dog knife. It's nice. It's nice. It's fun. Yeah, you can get that thing going. He fucking loves that thing. When he I've been a video date because it's so silly like bouncing around Oh Jesus do we do that? If someone controlled my PlayStation intake and then just pulled out of control or I'd be like Are we gonna play rock and lead? I guess that's what it is right because you never don't get pumped to play a really good game. No dude Spider-Man 2 I'm so excited that they're coming out like DLCs coming and I'm gonna go home and be like That's me. I'm like Marshall with the toy. Hey, if you fucked around with VR at all No, I don't like that shit. Let me explain why old school pot head love to be very high I like controllers right what I got was a steam deck which is like [1:20:01] You know the Nintendo switch. it's like that on steroids. And it gets games like really good games for the road. It has made it, because I fucked with everything from Game Boy on and having a steam deck. I'm like this, I got it for Christmas. I was like this is the greatest thing I ever had. I had to draw the line with video games. When we had, we set up a LAN. Yeah, you get that. The old studio, I got the bug again. Yeah. Yeah. Where I was running in there to play Quake. You turn your brain off. Couldn't wait. You turn the. But always feel like shit when you leave. Like what the fuck do I do? You do. You got to do it in like small servings. Or like there has to be a purpose to it where you're like, you're done at this moment, because if you can go, that's where you get sick. This is if you can just keep going until, like you need an ending point. Like that's why I like mad, the game ends, you're like, I played two games. I'm good. I should walk away from this. It was quick, you could play Death Matches where you have like, you know, five, six guys, when you're all killing each other. And you respawn and it gets up to a certain amount of deaths. [1:21:07] Oh, dude, I absolutely love video games. When I moved to New York, I was like, I'm done with them. And then six months later, I was like, where can I get a CheapXbox 360? I need to plug back in. But yeah, I mean, Shane and I on my podcast who is talking about NCAA college footballs coming out and we're I think gonna play in a vacation around Playing it because it's a game that hasn't been out since 2014. How does the new Apple What is it called again vision pro work? Does it work? Would I know it works with movies, but does it have to be everything from like the app store or could you play like PlayStation on it? You can play PlayStation? Yes, there's a way I've seen people connect, which is actually I'll find the video of it. So if you could do that, then you're watching augmented reality PlayStation. That's the way to get me in VR. Yeah, you're seeing a screen that's like fucking 30 feet wide and [1:22:04] you're on the field. Yeah, dude. I would love to be. I mean, you got to remote control. It's just like you do with your regular game. You know, I grew up with the Miami Dolphins coach, Mike McDaniel. It'd be fun to play mad and just be standing next to him in VR with a controller. I'm like, run the goddamn play, Mike. Dude, I fenced with Mark Zuckerberg and we weren't anywhere near each other. He was on one side of the room like 15 feet away You did this really is the best example I can show you is that like they're playing red dead redemption to The redemption on a big screen, but this is the Yosemite environment that the Apple headset puts you in I love that Oh wow, so the sky is dark because here's the thing red dead rock started such an incredible job That I would shit By the way, they're seeing through it is Dude, there's your entire field of view. Yeah, and you can look around and just see That's about the most you could do right now But that must be amazing when your entire field of view is taken up by the game and [1:23:02] In moments like this like red dead There's moments are like the desert or where you're in like a rain storm up in the mountains. Here's the question. Here's the question. Can you play Quake on that? You're like one of those people you go, I don't party anymore. I did like two hours later you guys. You got it from Peru. I'm just going to do a gummer a gummer. Look how flaky it is. Is that pure? I saw your reaction to those screens in there. Yes. The big 55 inch screens. Yes. I have one of those at home. I try to play Call of Duty on it. There is a level of, it's too big. Oh really? Yeah. What do you mean it's too big? It just gets too huge. I Have you ever played off like a call of duty in front like have you ever gotten really close to the screen to play? Yeah, when we when we moved in to our apartment We put the wrong TV in the bedroom and Katie plays call of duty and she she was playing video games like this too much This is too much because the screen was like fucking on it. So we were like oh, yeah, we switched it out I remember back in the quake playing days that guys didn't like some guys didn't like monitors [1:24:06] that were more than 21 inches. They wanted it right in front of them so that because you know you're moving your mouse right and the mouse. I didn't know I didn't know quake was a keyboard mouse game. Yeah, keyboard mouse. That's like some real shit. Real shit. That's the real shit. That's the scary shit. That's like you get really good at the movement with the with the keys and you get really good with your cursor and you know how to jump and every time you hit the space bar you're jumping. Yeah, that's like counter strike. People used to be into counter strike, which is like- It's really fast. The thing about Quake is it's super human speeds. You're moving at super human speeds with rocket launchers. And you can instantaneously change weapons. You rocket someone in the air and you electrocute them to death. It's insanity. If you could do that, like that, on that kind of a screen. I don't know, but I'll tell you what, I'm looking up Quake 4 on my steam deck. It's a keyboard mouse. You really want to keyboard it mouse. [1:25:01] You don't want to fuck with it with the good you need really precise movement Find like a good one with good graphics. The thing I'm gonna show you is how close some people put their face to their screen That and that does get right up on that so because you can I would imagine if you're controlling a 21 inch space Yeah And you are very accustomed to moving your cursor around a 21 inch space with your mouse, right? You're moving it around. You're very precise. If you stretch that bitch out to 40 inches or 45 or 50, now you're doing this. Yeah. Yeah. That does. It's all in one way. Right there. You really want it like a 21 inch monitor, I think. 24 to 27's the sweet spot. That's it, right? Yeah, that makes sense. That's it, right? Yeah, it makes sense. Like, there's a damn damn. And then you got to get glued onto that screen. Yeah. Because you don't want to go back and forth the screens. It's going to fuck with your timing. Yeah, you need something to take it. Yeah, you need to consider those guys are fucking freaks with their mouse sensitivity and the weight of the mouse. They add weights to the mouse. That's what it takes weights away. Some of them like lighter dials, so they make dials that are hollow to take as much weight out of them as possible. [1:26:06] So these guys may custom gaming mice. Mice. Mice, go find the lightweight gaming mice. They literally like, you know what they do with race cars? They like take everything out, anything that weighs anything. They drill holes in the door handles. They do that. Those, look at these mice. Hi, brood dude. Look at that. Those, look at these mice. Hi, great dude. Look at that, they're like skeletons. There's $170. Oh, dude, they're, by the way, some of them are more than that. It's at Ponege. Some of them are more than that. I love this called Ponege. You had to $495. See that one in the lower right hand side? Yeah. It's his Jamie the right hand middle yeah right there that light one the middle That's my style Damn dude and so what you're getting because I know you are you using the wheel on the top? I use the wheel to switch weapons sometimes I use the real I'll use the real for a rail gun So when I know I want to hit the rail gun. I just turn the wheel and it turns into the rail gun instantly [1:27:00] So I have keys pressed that are all set up exactly for each weapon. I feel like a coke head talking to a crack head Yeah, you go right right to blow and you go. I smoke it out of glass after it's a rocket. I'm like this is nuts Yeah, right key is all rocket launcher always always keep that thing on rocket launcher left key is fire And how long the games last like you said they're fast, but like five minutes faster, like... Well, there's a timer. So like if you're having a one-on-one death match, you'll set a timer, and it'll count you down, and then it'll say, fight. And then you're just running through the corridor, picking up weapons, trying to pick up armor, and then dudes know where you're at, because they can hear you, because they can hear your footsteps, and you're grunting as you're at because they can hear you because they can hear your footsteps and you're grunting as you're running and so you're running through these corridors. It's always one-on-one. Well, you can do multiple death matches where you just have a fucking melee. There's like 30 dudes just killing each other. You can be respawning and they kill you. Those are fun. Those are really fun. But the way to do it, like one-on-one deathmash style, is the real way to do it like one-on-one deathmash style is the real way to do it [1:28:06] Do you have a friend? Do you have any friends that if you picked Quake for up you could call them and be like we're doing that I wouldn't do that to them. I wouldn't do that to them You would bring that back in their life. It's too immersive man. It's too good. It's too good And if you have responsibilities. Yeah, oh, no, I mean dude. I do my responsibilities And if you have responsibilities, yeah, oh, no, I mean, dude, I do my responsibilities to put out this So it's kind of similar to Fortnite right? Look how fast this motherfucker's move. So he's shooting the rail gun now the rail gun kills you Instantaneously the rail gun is like wherever you point at it. You got that doom view This is like doom look at this and you're running like insanely fast by the way I love it's fun to watch the camera on the guy because his face is doing nothing because he's so concentrated. Yeah, and you can see how he's switching weapons. Yeah. So right, now he's back with the rail gun. He's got a rocket launcher. He's just flying around. Are they? Shotgun, boom, shotgun, kill that dude. Now he's got the, oh, that was the rail gun. This is the rocket that's a rail gun so he's just hopping around do they do like pro tournaments of this? [1:29:06] Fuck yeah, they do the finals. This is the top two guys really yeah, so see how he keeps running back to these spots That means the weapons are responding. Yeah, so every time you snatch a weapon you have a little bit of time boom Fuck damn okay. All right. This is the close to see rail guns at each other So rail gun is like an instantaneous death unless you're really armored up. Did he kill that guy? It's 11 to three. So whoever liquid RPHs. He fucked that dude up, but that dude had to run and get some more shit. So he had to run and get health. So now he knows where he is. He's now chasing him. How good did you get at this? and then see some guys. Yeah, I get fucked up. I get fucked up all the time. When you play online games, you'll go against people and you're like, oh, you're at different levels. You don't have the time to compete with some autistic dude who's on ADHD medication. Dial does. Doesn't have a job who gets a government check and he's just rocking people online. Like that South Park where they play a World of work craft and their their villain is that guy it's like Those wrist breaks on those guys get good and their identity wraps around their whatever their name is and they're going out [1:30:12] Fucking people up. There's certain guys you would see on a server and you're like, oh, no really? Yeah, you have a match with them You just get killed under the night. Do you get that thing really like stop. Oh, yeah, you get panicky So you're not into walls trying to find arm arm. Woo, woo, woo, woo. Do you get blown up again? Do they have videos of them freaking out? Because that's something I like to see as like... That was that sort of... Gamers spaszing and being like, what the fuck? Oh, there's a lot of those can do it anytime you want. So you could have a match anytime you want. That's too tempting online with real people anytime you want you log in you see a server you join the server boom. Yeah You're in it. There's one on one death matches where there's people waiting So you'll you'll look you'll find a server you're like one guy's waiting death slayer 69 is waiting [1:31:04] He's just like and and you spawn and they'll start talking shit and you got the keyboard you can talk quick shit fuck you bitch do we have to we'll play online rocket league or whatever which is like car soccer it's fun yeah yeah with the rage right here to yeah right I rage a lot at rocket league I I played this for years six soccer with it's soccer with cars which sounds. Which sounds, dude, 80s, so addictive. We get online at night and Katie and her brother, Kevin, are both really good at it. And I'm like, I get too intense and I'm like, fuck, fuck, and I like miss the ball. I'm like, fuck, and I rage out. But you'll play guys that you're like, oh, this guy's too good. Like he'll hit it in the air and then just like, over you just score a goal and you're like, what do you know? Yeah, there's tricks people can do and quake. Like the one that's what I mean. Like guys that get so good at it that you're like. Guys rock and jump. What's your rock and jump? So if you are fully armored, if you have 200 armor you can point your rocket down at the ground and jump at the same time [1:32:06] You pull the trigger and you go flying. Oh, that's genius. So you could rocket launch and rocket jump up to like a platform And then hide and then just start picking bitches apart And so everybody that walks in you got the rail gun you got your cursor pointed right at the doorway and every time people run in the doorway boom Out respond That's how it is when I watch people play Call of Duty I'm like oh you're just picking people off campers people get very mad at campers yeah I did but it's a fucking look you can get a lot of stri- snipers in a war shut the fuck up that's the bar the war you mad snipers and cheating yeah stop camping. He's like, I'm a sniper. Was cheating big back when you were playing? Oh, yeah. There's bots. So they would like... People would program. There was different bots. And one of them was an aim bot. So that what the aim bot would do is you could never miss. So if you, just with a regular stupid gun, like that only does like, you know, ten points of damage every time it hits you you get a pistol when you start sure [1:33:05] You're minimally armed. That's why you're going around getting the guy's it's very difficult to kill a fully armored guy with a pistol Sure or a rifle or whatever you get so you then you have to run and grab armory you have to run and grab a lot rocket launcher It's like it's like a supers One of those sweepstakes the super store sweepstakes were go, and you're just like going through a beer line. You're just running through, trying to gather up as much shit, and you know the map. Everybody has maps memorized. So they know when things are spawning, and some of them even have prompts to tell them, you know, health spawns in 30 seconds. Yeah. So every time they pass over armor, armor responds, and they have it all listed on these aim bots and they could never miss. So they would kill you and every time they kill you, they would be fully armored. They'd have all the weapons and then they'd know exactly where you're going to be and then they would kill you again. And they'd kill you again and kill you again. You couldn't, every now and then they would die and they would respawn and they would kill you again because they couldn't miss. I would love to just talk about a it an aim bot? Well, this is all sorts of at the beginning of this video, [1:34:05] which you were talking this is called duty. Yeah, it shows you that's fast. That's what you can buy and how you can subscribe to them per month. Oh, so you pay a company and they give you all that shit. Oh, that's crazy. Oh, that makes me mad. That's crazy. But how do you prevent that? You don't. Bro Bro call duties a lot quicker than I thought it was that's fast shit Yeah, it's very fast when they do multi-players. There's one games. That's almost quake like yeah There's one there's one level where they're doing like storage units that I watch Yeah shipment that's what it is and it's like Not stop like you just like turn a corner you dead shoot dead like that fast But when I remember one time laser tag back in the laser tag days laser tag I camped one time I just sat by the charge station and every time someone recharged a back We all went you know how you got in the lobby and they showed your stats my stats were like I'm surprised they didn't get a call from the military. It was like [1:35:03] 700 like 300 kills it was something wild because I was just sitting there I was like a shitty little nine-year-old doesn't be what you want to do what you want to do the zombie experience at Sandbox what is this? Sandbox is a VR game place. Okay, you go and You there's a thing called deadwood mansion and then there's a new Deadwood something. So you go to a place to do V.R. They have two zombie games. Yeah. Okay. You put on the headsets, and you are in a house. You're in this house that's getting stormed by zombies. Yeah. And everyone has something. You either have two pistols, or you have a shotgun, or you have a rifle. And or then you listen to me get the shotgun. Okay. Shotgun is Overpowered sometimes they fuck up when they make a game. Yeah, they got a nerf or weapon the shotgun's overpowered the shotgun kills everything The shotgun is the weapon and you just stand there and you just shot that But you're a safe room so you don't rob so you don't run into a table or anything [1:36:03] Yeah, but you run into your friends too sometimes, because you're all together, you can see each other though. Oh, so if you bump into it, like, so literally I would see you with your armor on, I would know where your space is, and we would all be moving around together. But sometimes you bump back into each other. Yeah. But there's zombies coming through the ceiling, there's storm in at you and clawing at you and see red in front of you when they get you. As someone that has sworn off VR, this is the way to get me into it. Which is same VR zombies. It's so fun. Because it's so fun. It's so scary as shit. Yeah, at one time I have the number three score for this Deadwood Mansion game. Just so much fun. I got the shotgun. Did you feel it, though? It's one of the dudes who worked there told me get the shotgun. Yeah, cuz you show up because hey Joe Rogan get the shotgun. It's fucking over. It's really fun. It's a crazy game dude. But that's crazy. What the VR does to video games is it just heightens the emotional impact that has on you because it's sensory. It's like kind of like deprivation tanks, but like it's just putting all the senses into that. Because like, I was obsessed with this game [1:37:06] Friday the 13th that they made, back on PS4, and you would either be a counselor or Jason. And it was just all on, dude, it's fucking wild. It was wild. I loved it. But what I would do is I'd smoke a fucking doink. I'd smoke a giant joint. And then then I turn off all the lights in my apartment and I'd play Jason and it's like It's scary because you this is the guy is Jason, but you go around and you hunt see see the counselors inside Oh my god, you're hunting counselors. Yeah, and And that's the phone box. That's how you call the cops. He's got a set in a trap. He's a decent Jason I still play it sometimes and I got it. I'm level 100 trap at the so Jason is smart. Well, you can set it's you it's all strategy. It's you versus these counselors. Right, but Jason can set traps. He has five bear traps and then five throwing knives. Doesn't that seem unrealistic that Jason would know how to set it? Yeah, it's a stupid mutant that drowned in the lake. He's dead. He's dead. The monster. But shouldn't be said it's one of the best traps. This game fucks you. [1:38:05] You get so scared. Did you get so scared when you're like, because when you're a counselor, you're just like walking around. You're like going through drawers, trying to find weapons or whatever. Yeah. And then all of a sudden it's he'll smash the window and it's like, yeah, yeah, and if you have headphones on, you're like, oh my god. Get the fuck out of here. Dude, I'm getting all goose up. I'm going home on play in Jason. The servers are still up. I'm fucking back on it when I get home. I have not seen it, but I have heard legend of this alien game that's on VR that's supposed to be insane. Like Like like you get a first movie. Oh, oh alien Ridley Scott. Yeah, there's an alien. I just watch this is true I want I want to I want to make sure this is true because someone told me that's a terrifying game that you can play on VR That's based on the first alien I just were doing this they told me this at least a year ago maybe more data [1:39:04] They told me this at least a year ago, maybe more. That probably more than a year ago. Do you think we see in the future, do you think we see things like heart attacks and shit from VR, is already happening? Like people getting so scared that it hurts them in real life. Well, I think if you're really vulnerable and your heart gets jacked up to like 190 beats a minute, especially if you have one of those guys on those omni-directional treadmills they have now. Oh really? Dude, they have a surface. It's a new surface that it's a contained surface like a contained space and whatever direction you walk in, it moves. It also does like the topography of like- No, no, no, it just stays flat but every you can go left and right and it goes left and right and it goes you back up it backs up with you you stay in the same spot but you're walking around and it's somehow or another registers through the headset into the flooring which direction you're going and it compensates for that they're gonna think we're such idiots in the future [1:40:04] when they're like you you're just holding a controller and playing. But do you know what kind of good shape you get in? Disney updated this. It's not available yet, but they've made one that's now they've shown it this year. Here's what you do. You put ankle weights on and you put a weighted vest on. Yeah. And then you play one of these gun games that's really really intensive, and you get that, and you get, and you walk it around with all that weight on. Well, that's a fucking work out. Also, what they should do is, we got those trillions of dollars going around in our military. The military probably has something like this developed. 100%. There are with Boston Dynamics. Right, they're probably laughing at this. Yeah, they go you want to see our robot take down a fucking village in Columbia? The alien game I found if this is the correct one is Someone made the actual alien game and they made like a VR port of it if you will So like they've sort of hacked it so that it works in VR. Oh really? That's the official I think that must be it [1:41:00] fatigued Alien but what I heard is it fucking terrifying yeah because you can get scared to shit i mean i got to get that jason game and i knew what was going on but that one movie was scary er because there was only one alien it was smart great they kind of fucked that up in the second one because there's a bunch of them they were kind of easy to kill and they also just threw it in they're like and around the ship around this planet here you go's a ton of them. I never bought the second one It's a great movie I love it. I myself aliens It's a great movie, but it's not the same thing as the first movie that first one was smart as fuck Yeah, it was smart and clever to wait for people and hide it like it knew how to get around you It knew how to like attack you when you weren't looking and the second one there in the little mouth Yeah, it was the little mouth in the second one Where it came out. Oh, they always come out right here the amount of that the tongue is like a mouth and it gets you right in the head and sucks your brains out Did you like Prometheus? Yes, I love that. I just watched it. I did. I loved it I love the idea. I had a problem with I loved the idea at a problem with the ending because she escapes on this [1:42:05] the idea at a problem with the ending because she escapes on this spoiler. She escapes on the spacecraft of the architects, like the big humans that made us. And she's going back to their world. Like that she sets the course to be like, no, fuck this. I'm going to go where these people are from that made us and made the, the animal, made the, made the alien. Yeah. It just leaves you, just leaves you high and dry. We're like, where'd you go? Show me that shit. I want to see what planet all these architects are living on. The last one was really good. Alien three? What was, no, the last one. What was the covenant? Covenant was good. Really? All right. You know, you know, he's in that. Jesse Smoulet. Really? Yeah. When he pops up and stuff, you're like, oh, hey, like mighty ducks. It was on like during Christmas and it was just on in my hotel. And I was like, hey, Jesse Smoulet. That's the kind of mistake that's tough to forget. Well, it's getting caught in such a major lie. It's such a sociopathic situation. [1:43:02] But also something for attention that's so... And you get turned on by the people that were helping you? Yeah. Where they go like, yeah, fuck that guy. I help them and he's a fucking dick and you're like, oh my God, that's what's wild as dude, if I got it. It's also like the way it was structured to come in with the news still on his neck. Like what? Yeah dude, it's like, oh no, it's like a- Oh, the subway sandwich. Ha ha ha ha. You know what I'm saying? It's like murder mystery dinners. You know where they have to oversell it? Where they're like, oh the knife is stealing me. But isn't that crazy that there's people out there that will do literally anything? Yeah, because they're not in therapy. If they don't understand why they're reaching out for this. But don't you think people that are that broken? Like it's not that simple. That's so broken. No, not at all. I think what it is is it's like, you know when there's like an infection because something's embedded in you, [1:44:02] but it's not the thing that's embedded in you that's causing the problem as much as it is the part of it that's infected and now it's got a different thing. That's what that is where it's like something happened to them and instead of them solving it and pulling that out, that splinter that got infected, the infection built on it and now you're dealing with six things on top of the actual problems. That's my guess, but that's what it feels like. Cause I've seen people go through bad shit and correct it and be okay and I've seen people go through kind of bad shit and then it just. There's also this thing that people do when they do things like that, would they recognize that a certain amount of bullshit is tolerable. Yeah. A certain amount of you exaggerating and experience and saying that you were threatened. A certain amount of that seems to be tolerated. Well. Or you don't want to question because then it appears that you're insensitive and you go, well, you know, and then there were so many people [1:45:00] that stood up for that guy and like made these tweets about- We need your reaction. Yeah, but it's also like we don't have any information. You don't have any information and you're acting on this, but the story seems so implausible. But nobody wanted to say it. Nobody wanted to say, I think you made that up. I immediately thought of when that happened in like the reaction a couple weeks later, I immediately thought of Ben Stiller in the cable guy when they're in like the reaction a couple weeks later. I immediately thought of Ben Stiller in the cable guy when they're doing like the Meninda's brothers spoof and they do the phone call and he goes, I don't know who it was but he was Asian. And they just like, you can, they're clearly lying on the phone call. And you're like, that's kind of how that felt to me where you're like, dude, you work in the arts, you should know how to tell a better story. Your storytelling is dog shit. Yeah, this one. So that's like, there's spoofing [1:46:04] the bananas. Like they clearly killed their parents, but that was their excuse. Yeah. And you's like, they're a spoofing that menendez, like they clearly killed their parents, but that was their excuse. And you're like, it wins someone like him who's been a child actor, this guy's been a child actor's whole life, right? And they know how the roller coaster goes. They know they're on fire, they're in mighty ducks, they're in fucking alien covenant, you know what I mean? And then they're on a big show. They're on a big fucking show. And then it starts, tank starts running out. Where you're like, hey, the show's running out and we're not paying you as much as you think you need to get paid. You get desperate. And you start being like, well, what can I do to get, to stay up there? What's going to keep me, how do I rocket launch? Am I wearing enough armor to jump and rocket launch myself back up and he fucked up. And he just does like, it was a desperate move. A publicity move. Yeah, being like, if this works, I am the victim. Everyone loves the victim. And it'll just keep being that, [1:47:00] but then you can't fucking caught, dude. Hilarious. It's just funny. It's just funny. It's just the funniest shit in the world is you're like, what's up? Like that call when they, dude, ran as easy, did this awesome show in Edinburgh at Fringe in 2019 when I was there. And he did an hour about what it was like being busted lying about 9-11. Right. Dude, the show gave me anxiety. Because he did it beautifully. He did it beautifully. He was funny, he started funny, he was explaining how he was famous, it was the league, it was the last season, and he tells you about the call from the New York Times where the guy goes, I wanna talk about 9-11. And Reyna's easy, he was like, dude, he's the way he, even telling you this. So, he describes it, you're like, oh, fuck, but he made it funny. And he made it into a thing of like, I fucked up. It was a great hour. I hope he taped that. I don't know if you ever taped that, but I mean, And he's like, fuck. [1:48:06] I think he's maintained that he told the truth to the entire time, hasn't he? Yeah, I think he, I think he, did he ever say? Yeah, I don't know. This is where I feel bad for actors because as comedians, we can immediately go like, I'm a fucking idiot. Like you, we can say we're wrong much easier than actors. Right. Because actors have that, and you know, you've been around them, they have that like, it's like being around the queen. There's like little rules that you can't do, or you're like, I can't bust your balls because you'll take it seriously. Yes. That's just how the entertainment business is. Like musicians act different than actors and actors act different than comedians. And there's just all the stuff but I don't think as an actor, he can go like, ah fuck man, I was desperate. You don't know, you don't know when you're gonna get on your next show. You don't know when you're gonna get your next gig. If you would have just done one of those, he probably would have to admit that it was true. That's what I mean. I don't think he wants to admit that it was true. And now he's stuck in that prison forever. And now he's stuck in that thing where you're like, [1:49:07] so you're saying something that we all, that the guy's involved said that you were full of shit. You know what, wild though? I guarantee you that some people believe him still. Like there's people that believe cause me to the end. That is what a writer die. When that evidence comes out, it's like women that love serial killers. You're like, you can just get there, huh? It's like thinking that that orc is not going to turn on you after it did three. Yeah. After it killed three people and you're like, I bet, you know, my pool is a little bit bigger. And then there's like the, the female vampire helper, like Galein Maxwell's, like the female helper. Like Galein Maxwell's like the female helper. There is a level of evil on that whole Galein Maxwell Epstein. That's why it's such a joke right now is because it's so bad. They know it's like an Epstein island and you're like, oh, he is the worst of the worst. It's like the most disgusting shit. [1:50:03] But the it's what kind of it comes back to where we're talking about with billionaires It's like if you got that evil person in your ear right there. You're doing some dark shit looks great Galeimax will looks great as she runs Florida prison half marathon Does yoga and Pilates ahead of March appeal? Who reads that and goes good good? Let it go. Yeah, I don glad. I know it's running. There's got to be people. Her life is threatened on a level that will never understand. Bro, there is no chance she stays alive if they let her out. No, because the people that are... She's going to be writing a book, you know? Oh, all right. She writes a book. There's already a manuscript. There's already like to do think that that's why she's in prison. Yeah, it's listen to this What if she goes to prison to write a book Because they say the only way that this information is gonna get out is if we have you locked we have you locked up Yeah, we protect you and you write a book dude [1:51:00] Her information of rolodex of the things that have happened can destroy people that are as powerful as our top businesses. Like it will topple kings. Like she has information on people. Of course they're gonna lock us. Yeah, let her live in the villages in Florida. She's fucking just dangerous. She has a dangerous amount of knowledge. And she's probably known the clock's ticking. Yeah. Release the court documents expect well over 100 people connected to Epstein, which is just like what hold up what's the full she's serving 20 years in prison for Lauren Young women blah blah blah. She shared her thoughts via an attorney ahead of the release of court documents expected to name well over a hundred people connected with Epstein Maxwell's lawyer Arthur Adala. Adala said that New York nation's Mario Kumo. No, not Kumo. Cuomo. Quizz Cuomo, right? Yeah, yeah. Quizz Cuomo. Not more. I think it's the younger one. I don't know. Yeah, the guy used to be on CNN. Yes. Yes. News nations Cuomo that Maxwell has nothing to say about the impending release of names but that the former socialite takes issue with the fact that the only person facing [1:52:10] consequences over the rampant sex trafficking of young girls is a woman. I don't think she has anything to talk about. That's how much she is. Maybe that if you look at this crime, this overall crime, it's all about men abusing women for a long period of time and it's only one person in jail, a woman. Absolutely genius. What a genius defense. Her going like this. So I guess it's a boys club when everyone's getting abused, but in court it's only a woman. And you're like, well, the other guy got murdered. Epstein got murdered in jail. Maybe he should tell us who else is involved and we'll lock him up too. Yeah, well out. But how weird is the no one got named? Well, that's what I mean with. That's how you know how much power is involved. She's on a level of danger that they're like, she's like, that's what we need to really get in our hands. There's still an eye can kill you in front of everybody and hide it in the news thing going on. What do Putin just do? Yeah. Putin just killed the journalist and was like, what are you gonna do and we're like The that Navajo subways are real nice [1:53:08] That guy's name Navale yeah, I always fuck it up. I Not like the sweetest of dudes either right everyone's dirty. Everyone's a human being That's the whole point is like there's danger on you spoke at the list I think you just spoke out against Putin. The crazy one that I'm still obsessed with is the dude that tried to overthrow Putin. Do you remember that? We were moving it with an army. Let's get to this guy first. Alexei, Russian. Yeah. Novalon was a Russian opposition leader, lawyer, anti-corruption activist and political prisoner who organized anti-government demonstrations and ran for office to advocate reforms against corruption in Russia and against President Vladimir Putin and his government. So what was the controversy about him though? His views? No, no, no, but there were some other ones. There was some other ones like... [1:54:01] He's a Cosby believer. He's like, I think Bill Cosby go to bed rip. He had some questionable things that I was reading. But the other dude, like led an army and they were like, hey, he's marching on Moscow and then he went, just kidding, no, I'm not. And then a month later, they're like, his plane crashed. And you're like, why are you getting into plane? You went against Putin and you're going to are you getting into playing you win against Putin and you're gonna fly around in Russia? Are you out of your fucking mind? What the fuck is wrong with you? I was knowing around him going like you can't John madness. You can't take a bus We can protect the bus Imagine thinking that Putin wouldn't kill you When you pulled up to Moscow Thank you like we showed up in a tank before he died. Okay. Okay Um You like we showed up in a tank before he died. Okay. Um Just like who he was who he was. I mean, I don't know what so he's basically an anti-Putin activist. Yeah He's poison by an opposition figure anti-corruption activist was unlawfully detained has now been in prison for 11 years and six months [1:55:01] He's still in prison and suffers contin continual ill treatment, including constant surveillance and psychological pressure. He must be free to immediately and unconditionally. So he died in prison. And what was the controversy about him? Someone was saying something about his nationalist views. It could be, just see if you can find something. Someone was saying terrible things. But I mean, guy dies you always wonder like that is something that they would do. Yeah, you know They say oh you remember when you got that guy Lit Venenko with the In England with the sushi. Yeah, where they just reads down or like your dad it plutonium They put plutonium and the guy is sushi and there was like And there was like, he was like a rogue KGB agent. And they were like, we'll see. But dude, you think they're bad. What do you think we do? Yeah, we do that too. What do you think we do? We do shit that we're like, the CIA's been cooking up stuff that like even Russians go like, that's pretty are fucking nuts. [1:56:05] And he's like, he's like, yeah, we fucking did this whole thing. We've been playing into our towers and they're like, you guys don't give the fuck. Like if there's an open conversation about it, they just fuck around. Um, not the Western liberal Democrat. If there's a darker side to him some say that such a fucking they're pushing that out there to be like, Hey, is Controversial views on Muslims and the caucus Georgians and Central Agent Asian migrants in Russia immigrants from Central Asia Bringing drugs to Russia Navalny said in an interview with 2012 defending what he described as a realist Visa requirement for wonderful people from Tajikistan and Uzbekistan. While he was reflected upon some of these past remarks, they frequently resurface, causing some de-questionative to Valhiny is what many in the Western world think he is. The Valhiny's controversial statements stem from his political origins and the nationalist [1:57:02] movement, according to McGinn. There will be a feel feel good a 24 movie about this guy in two years. He used to attend the Russian March, a very far right nationalist group, generally behind the slogan Russia for ethnic Russians. Anybody who expects Navalny to be an ideal western liberal Democrat has been mistaken. She tells own news his ultra nastlest nationalist sentiment was prominent in a video dating back some seventeen years filled with xenophobic comments do you think this is like his getting like when comics when they bring up old clips of comics on podcasts like he was like uh... that was twelve years ago i was crazy so this is what he was saying he said uh... everything in our way should be carefully but decisively removed through deportation. Navalny said in a video dressed as a dentist comparing immigrants to dental cavities. He was dressed up. He was doing costume work. He's like, he has his hands like this. He's like, I know we're having fun here, but really, we've got to get rid of immigrants. Maybe he was a sketch. [1:58:04] Yeah, he's just two hundred and I said I'll scotch It's like life from Moscow. It's political prison I'm gonna say you know the valley the best way to get this information of this human If you want you to be over the top against the immigrants over the top like they're fucking cavities Oh, and I'm the dentist the only take care of cavities. Whoa, and I am the dentist. The only dickhead of cavities for you. They go, we'll call it laughing gas. And it's all sketches done like this. And then it's trick is due to the do this. They really did a movie already. I already made a documentary about them two years ago. Oh, they had it. What does the documentary say? I have no idea. Does it say, does it all upscrow thing? CNN, HBO, the other thing. Yeah, HBO, CNN. Yeah, see, anybody that's in opposition to Putin has to be good, you know, it's the enemy of our enemy is my friend. Yeah. Yeah, that's a, that's a. But the other guy. Controversial take. This guy was just gossiping. This guy's like, I got tanks, bro. We're fucking pulling up to Moscow. [1:59:05] And he was gonna be okay. Thought it was fine. And by the way, it was in the news a lot and then it was completely gone, which you're like. Of course he did it. Like everybody knows he did. He's sucky air of the room, but he's always, he's putting so much like, what are you guys doing? Yeah, that's my favorite. Why are you always killing after me? What are you doing? In the all of a sudden, we haven't invaded anybody. All of a sudden interview and the Tucker interview, he really loves to be like, well, you guys are so great. You know when you fight with your girl and she like, she'll bring up something you did and you get defensive so you just go like, yeah, but what's up with you? Fucking, you do stuff. Ah, totally. You're a bitch sometimes. Oh god damn it, I got nothing. I got nothing, I'm sorry. Ah! Yeah. That's true. But he's got a point. I mean, do he a lot of shit? Do you remember the lady that wrote him the poem when he invaded the Ukraine? [2:00:00] She wrote him a poem? This Hollywood actress did a thing that was like, Yeah, dude. No way. This shit is so funny. This is not real. Don't tell me this shit. You never saw this? No. Dude, this shit is so funny. Play it for the beginning. This is the most I'm in LA, Bible. Oh my god. I have to see this. I have to see this. I don so sorry that I was not your mother. If I was your mother, you would have been so loved, held in the arms of joyous light. Never would the stories plight the world unfurled before our eyes appear demise of nations that in peaceful, and night skies, I would you remember the world would have been warm, so much laughter and joy, and nothing would harm. I can't imagine the stain, the soul stealing pain that the little boy you must have seen and believed and the formulation of thought quickly taught. This is so self-grituitous. It's all that it. Yeah, lady, just get to the punch. [2:01:00] It's too many superfluous words. It's a world sad. It's a marvelous. It's a too many superfluous words This is a world's fight superfluous. It's a word sound that lady But by the way, do you know that she's a wild one though? Yeah, but you also know that Vladimir Putin was given up you know He's given up by his mother for a thought like oh really? He is like a horrible relationship with his mother He was like he was given up for adoption and then people and they like started training him as a like a young Young he got into like as a soldier. Yeah, it's like a super soldier He was like built for this shit. So this woman in a condo in Santa Monica going I would hug you and I would feel the plight of the world on my shoulders because I have a way The I was left for dead. Yeah, and you would be dead as well. You would not be my mother. I would kill you Putin is so scary that when he put on hockey equipment and played against the Russian team They let him score like six goals. There was some Kim Jong Un shit 100% They're like, oh whoa look at him go. He's a legit black belt in judo though. Is he? [2:02:05] Does he just, he does, he does some bow and judo? Does he do? I do not know if he does some bow as well. But he definitely does judo. He's a legit black belt. Really? He's an older guy, but by the way, he moves and the things he does, he does everything absolutely correct. And I'm not just, I'm not by I just I'm not a judo expert, but also I know these I know how these throws look when I see judo experts do them But this isn't this isn't the Steven Cigall video's where he's just doing like the No, that's not see like right there. That's a beautiful hip toss. That is a beautiful hip toss the way he did that the what look at this smoothness man That's legit. That's legit. Do you think he's a legit judo black belt so that guy is definitely not helping out no no no no no no Jamie hold on that like Jamie this is this is how these things are trained no I know I'm just saying but guys do resist to but this is just an execution of technique yeah just the fact that he can do that that is like if I showed you how to do that it would take you a long time before you could do it [2:03:01] that's moving now I'm very dumb when it comes to both judo, but also, more importantly, I'm very stupid when it comes to politics. Here's my question. Jamie, you questioning this? No, I'm not questioning it. I'm just saying, if you're the guy that's going with Putin, you're definitely gonna be the best dance partner of all time. Yes, but you're gonna lean into it. You're selling the moves. Yeah, you're wrestling. I've literally had this done to me. K-fabe. And it's sort of. It's actually just drilling. But I've had this done to me by people who are good at judo and it's shocking. How important. Easy they can throw you around. Yeah, because it kicks his feet out. All he's doing is it seems a lot harder than it is. You're just getting the guy, you're timing the bounce and you're sweeping him and pulling at the same time and you just go flying. Yeah, it's like when you were a little and you'd be walking in front of one of your friends and then kick your foot. Is the other one? And you go like, you go fucking flying. Fuck you. I think wars should just be our leaders versus theirs. Oh, he would win. I mean, like maybe that was also... Maybe that was up all of them. Maybe that was... That was like everyone who's ever been president that would change the way we elect our president were like who we got who can we roll [2:04:06] Wow, we would change probably it would be UFC champion. Yeah, John Jones John Jones in 2024 and we'd just be Dominating the world. Yeah, we make Alex Pajeda an official US citizen Immigration would change so fast Francis and God are US citizens. I love to have you sir in God or US is a good love to have you sir. Yeah. Full US citizen ship raise your right hand. We fucking love you, bro. Brazilian population shot through the roof. Yeah. It's what that would be. If there was one guy, it would either be John Jones or Francis and God. There'd be the one person. I mean, we don't know until they do it until they do the dance. But you know what? Another country would probably be smart and they go like hey Francis How about we give you everything you're our king your everything? Yeah, and then you're just we have the best now we have the best military in the world one guy But we still have bones Jones. Yeah, oh man. Can you imagine that and then that's we got to get Jones on steroids Like every we got to drop the you saw it out right away I, I'm telling you right now, you saw it is gone [2:05:05] and they put him in like a weapon X program or they're like, how can we? You saw it is gone, Brock Lesnar returns. Oh my God. Oh my God dude. Brock Lesnar returns, he's 350 pounds at 49 years old. Yeah, with four percent body fat. And you just hear the, just like a juggernaut. And you just hear the, just have a badass president And then no one talked shit about the president. You think CNN or Fox News is gonna run their mouth about a guy He was like by the way, I'm doing a press briefing He's just doing is he's like oh, yeah, huh? What about taxes he goes I think you need to shut the fuck up. That's what I think you need to do [2:06:02] Yeah, dude because Putin is like, he's the only badass. You see that guy, he's killed people. Well I think Netanyahu has as well. Netanyahu is like a serious like operative in the Israeli army. What was Netanyahu's military background? It's like, it's actually very impressive. Well I hear about the stuff that he's done. I mean yeah in israel everyone serves so so question of if you did or not yet but i think he was like uh... is a force is guy with their version of that whatever the navy sealed also the idea is always funny to me of running up on someone that's like trained to be a badass and you think they're an old man and we're just it's taken it's the i whole idea taken but i just watched uh... here, after graduating from high school in 67, Netanyahu returned to Israel to enlist in his really defense forces. He trained as a combat soldier and served for five years in a special forces unit of the IDF. Yeah, that guy's. He's run up on him, run up on BB. He's been so sensitive. [2:07:00] They'll tell you what a pencil. Yeah, he'll, he'll, you won't even know what happened. Your arm will be broken and you'll be like, I didn't even reach for him. The crazy thing about this is really thing is before October 7th, there was thousands of people in the streets protesting against him. Thousands for like months. Oh, yeah. Because he was trying to expand the powers of government. Yeah. Well, he's a guy where he's like, you know, you look at people that have been through war and that kind of shit. They're just like, uh, they're callous to it. If I was your mother, I would have taken you in a joyous bathing light of I would have had you suckle on my teeth until you were 12 years old. The moderate earth and spirits of the sky. I was adding words. I would bathe you in crystals. I love watching videos of guys of older guys, like Don Fry was one of my favorite guys when I was young to watching Pride and shit. And then he's just a true Arizona badass. So you see him now as the old man and you're like, you could still fuck shit up. But recently retired, I was watching an interview [2:08:00] with Donald Saroni, who I love. He's one of my favorite fighters. I love Donald. I'm from Colorado and he's just like, He's a great dude too. He's just a fun guy. He's like a badass. All the story, the story he told on here about cave diving gave me legitimate anxiety. Listening to that, I was too high. And he was talking about being lost and I was like, Oh fuck. But the story was fucking insane. He was like lost and could only get back through pure darkness underwater. He's like a true American badass. And he was on this podcast talking about how he got like this idiot like ran up on him and he just head kicked them and was fucking done. And he was explaining like, the situation. He was like, I'm a doc. Yeah, they're at a lake. And I was watching it when I was flying to Austin and I was like, I found my genre of my favorite thing which are people fucking around with older badasses and finding out. But this wasn't even he was older. But I mean like active. So Roni's a bad at like an old now don't run up on the guy. Like I don't run up on him any time in his life. [2:09:00] Ever. But this was like years ago. Oh, this is when he was active in the UFC. Yeah, he was active That's what it done thing these guys that think that they can you can beat a trained fighter They didn't know he's a trained fighter. They just douchebags. Well guess what and they got head kicked back to the wrong guy I mean imagine that's your opening move to so much to stain do you have in this guy's ability But how much head kick him how much athleticismism? I can barely clip my ponyels now. This guy's starting with a headkick. He's like, bap! And he's like, bap! It's literally what he does for a living. Yeah, dude, he was a guy, man. You grow up in Colorado and you go to the Western Stock Show or whatever, and I was just like, I'm just like a pussy suburban kid. But you these like Eastern Colorado kids or these kids that are from like the real front range and you're like, oh, you're a badass. This is how the land got settled. Yeah. He has this one KO in the UFC, this one combination where he lands on this dude where it's like the Matrix. He like, and he's just touched him. [2:10:01] He punches him up, punches him down kicks him falls up and the way he did it was R. I forget the fighter's name that he did it to we went to a Rick story We went to a UFC. Is that it? Yeah, so watch it. Hold on. Let me do it from the beginning We'll get this how many jab to the body left hand ducks down head kick. That's a jab to the body, left hand, ducks down, head kick. That's a full meal. Are you out of your fucking mind? That's a full meal. I had to get fucking mind. It's so cool. It's so cool you could do that in real life. You fucking mind. I went to a UFC event at Barclays because Steve A. Mio Titch was on awesome. And his manager was like, oh, I can get you tickets to the fight that's at Barclay. Steve, I wasn't on it, but Seroni was. And I'm a huge Seroni guy. And I went with Lewis J. Gomez. And we sat there and I got so excited when Donald Seroni knocked the dude out that Lewis was like, as a friend, it bothers me how much you like this guy. It's like a friend gone and I was like, it's like you want him to be your dad. And I'm like, no, fuck that. He's just like the coolest when you're like, that guy's so fucking cool. [2:11:08] Lewis can't help himself. I love that dude. Lewis, the first event we ever went to, the first live UFC event I ever went to was Jones, Sonan, and Jersey. Chelsea, it was like, I don't think Jones had the title yet yet or maybe he did the light heavyweight, but it was John Jones, Chelsone and and we're in the crowd and I've been to boxing matches and you feel that John had the light heavy Title back then yeah, and he was a shoot nonch I mean he beat the fuck Yeah, he beat him up so bad he broke his own toe. Yeah shooting off so hard off the ground Why is he smashing him that you could see it in the video where it turns over. Yeah. Is it going to overhand shot where they see where it turns over? Yeah. So, and here's the thing, he didn't even know it was broken until he was talking to me. Yeah, in the ring. Yeah. You look down. I remember that because I was in the arena. You look down and you're like, I think your toes broken and he was like, he hop to fuck Chale son and up. That's crazy. He just wanted to fuck him up and teach him that you do not belong in here with me. [2:12:06] I mean, dude, Bones Jones is just unbelievable. He's a monster. And the thing is, greatest light heavyweight of all time without question. Yeah. There's no second, there's no second place. Dude, those old Nike Jones is number one for sure. Those old Nike like with the open split on the sides We can he can me you mm-hmm. Yeah, dude. That was wild. So we were there Here's a thing man if he didn't get busted all those times and all the things he did and He would have Nike sponsorships He already had one he had them lined up. He would be the Jordan of fighting. Yeah, you'd just be like That's how talented that guy is. Yeah, you're just like, you know, it's the greatest thing you can't even argue it. You can argue who comes close to him. Yeah. But we were at that fight in Lewis and we were watching these guys get chippy. These like jersey Italian guys are just fucking yelling at this guy and it's like a dude, you know, eight mile style like a white guy being like, yo, what's up with the disrespect and Lewis just so casually goes She's gonna be a fight should pull your phone out those guys are gonna fight and I was like I don't know [2:13:09] They're just John or whatever and then it just they just start fighting in the crowd and I was like damn Lewis You really felt that yeah, like felt it in the senses. He's like yeah, it's about to go down Who is that some fights? Yeah, I love it. He's got some crazy stories He He's told on when I've done podcasts with him about like growing up He had a fucking tough life. That's why I always say people with Lewis I go if you had that tough of a life There's no way you'd end up how good he's done Mm-hmm. All of us would have failed right with all the hard shit because sometimes you talk to people and you're impressed by What they've responded to and right? You're like there's no way I could have responded to that like Vladimir Putin He's an evil guy. He's done evil shit But you read about his childhood, but that's why that lady's poem so funny And you're like this guy was literally thrown in a ditch basically and then came up in his now the most powerful man Outside of the United States. That's a fucking drive. That's a drive [2:14:01] That's a response that yeah, I do not have you don't get that drive if you're the son of the king That's exactly yeah, if you're a ma you know if you're if you're like given everything You don't have that in you know, we are like everyone left me who's like I change rules Yeah, I run it again. That was my favorite thing is he goes. I am no longer president prime minister Guess what prime minister has more power than president and then after a while he goes i am uh... no longer president prime minister guess what prime minister has more power than president and after a while ago some just president again the guys just change in shit in a way that everyone around him is going like bad asses rushing bad asses around we're going like and it's a good one unlike that one that you have to be agreeable his yes man it's got to be a terrifying thing. Well, he's got it locked in As long as you play by the rules Seems like he lets you live Who do you think kiss that's exactly it? There you go. It's I might live. Who do you think Has the more asked Kester's around them Putin or Kim Jong Un? Kim Jong Un. Yeah, that's like crazy. I bet Putin, Putin's intelligent. [2:15:06] I bet Putin requires people to have different perspectives. Challenge. So he can take into consideration. And I bet he's very strategic about what they do and why they do it. I think Kim Jong Un, like that's... Well, he's a rich, you ought to talk about a prince's king son. Exactly. Exactly. Like, there's the comparison. But the difference is like the people of Russia are doing way better than the people of North Korea. Well, people from North Korea, they like find out about stuff on the outside. Like when they get out and they're like, what the fuck, dude? Yeah. I'd be so mad if you're North Korean and you get out and you go like, the fuck? That's a whole country like an architect. Yeah? Yeah. They're just like, no, you don't even get info from the outside. You get nothing. And when dear leader dies, you have to cry for like months. They don't put people in jail that didn't cry hard enough. If I got arrested by grandmother past and I loved her. [2:16:02] If they were doing that and I didn't get arrested, I'd be like, dude, I was dealing with shit. You know, I deal with it in my own way. I go like, I think about it. I cry when I'm alone. You get a fuck alone. I had to watch Iron Claw that wrestling movie last night in my hotel room, the jar or something loose. So look at this as people that have to publicly cry. All right, when Kim Jong-il died, right? And they did this. It is hilarious that you're that powerful, that you're like, cry harder, motherfucker. That everybody has to cry. Yeah. This is where communism leads kids. All you fucking idiots out there that think they just, no one's ever done it right, there's only one way to do it. You have to. Yes. Someone has to enforce the rules. That person is always the military, and they have power over everything. Jamie's pointing this guy out. You think he's gone? This guy in the middle goes like, oh, fuck, I didn't know what camera's there. I didn't know what fucking camera was there. I just, that guy's probably tortured right now. Yeah. That guy's just still being whipped. Yeah, Kim Jong Un said, when ill died. Yeah, some people are trying to move in on the territory [2:17:05] It's like the Prince bitch, but also so the difference between a self-made man and a princess that prince has that like Latin guy like they have that energy with that guy My uncle has ran up on like Vladimir Putin would be like I am very disappointed that you would not think that I would take care of you. He'd be like, right, you know, he's like, you are dead. You are dead to me. You're like that prince energy. And now the song and the stars have spoken and you have died. Dennis Rodman wants you to die. Dennis Rodman, would you like to kill my uncle? Thumbs up or down. He's our only one. Imagine you let this. Right. I was He's like, what's up, what's up, what's up, man? When he's over there, he's hammered in that documentary. He's like, oh man, you rule. When he sings him happy birthday. Wow, big J showed me that documentary. Like rubbing his hands together. Imagine being friends with a dictator of a country where the people are starving. And you're getting drunk with that guy and playing basketball and just hanging out. And then you, and then like, yeah, and then you walk outside. Uh, there it is. What is he saying? [2:18:10] Did it, they're clapping off. Do the NBA players that are there for the fat check? Wow. You know what, though, how many times have we, how many times have we done gigs that have killed our soul? That one's going to feel weird. Okay. Now, do you have to lose? Do you have to lose to the North Koreans? Is this going like this, Joe? The standing there after you were a four time all-star in the NBA and you're like, I don't know how they could lose. Here's the question, do they have to lose? I mean, are they allowed to really play? Probably not. Probably, like there's no competition here. This is insane. I would say they give them as much pushback as that guy in the judo class did against Putin. That guy was good. I'm not playing deep. That guy's good. Shut up, Jamie. That guy's good. No, hold on. Go back. What is a bunch of guy in dudes letting a really short guy shoot a ball from very far away? In your age it's like error. You're a hater. No, that [2:19:06] guy's the best. Jamie's like, no, I would key up on that guy and make his life. I look like an all star in this. So they let go. Oh, they let the Koreans get close. Is that what happened? I would guess they would want this to be like Harlem Globetrotters game where they were these players that they know to just beat the shit out of their yo they let Robin play with lip rings yeah this can't be real do that story when he left in the last dance when they're talking about that bowls team in each other making I think are they don't know who's in charge of it be I think they're making a movie about this whole day or to oh in in poignant right no robman going. Oh, it's dude like Billy I think Billy Korg talked about on this podcast. Oh, that's nuts. Yeah, it's yeah. I think you did too now you brother that up here. He just asked Phil Jackson. He's like, I'm gonna go to Vegas. He filled Jackson's like, please let it be two days. I know it's like four. There's on a run in the season. He's like, oh, I got a Vegas and get fucked up. I'm hanging out with Carmen Electra in close axons like, God damn you're so good. Being [2:20:09] that good at something where they bend the rules for you. Yeah. And they go like, I fucked you. All right. Just go ahead. Just come back. Please. And he's like, I might not. He's a mystery games. I think he did, right? Did he miss games, Jamie? I'm trying to remember that the movie right now is in production. It's called 48 hours in Vegas, but it's been in the business for three years. But I think he took like four days. It was during the finals. The finals! During the finals! It was maybe three days, but I think he took two days. They had to go get them as I remember. Like Michael Jordan, Phil Jackson, SkyPip, and all got out of plane. And we're like, you gotta come back. We have a game in the morning. You're our leading rebounder. And he's like, I was so insane. And he's just been partying for days. Dude, it's like the hangover meets a space jam. They're of our life and you're here in Vegas, Vegas. Vegas. [2:21:05] Did you ever see where, God, what's good? What? Production's off a little bit, I guess, the Jonathan Majors who's had some problems this year. He was playing Robyn. He was playing Robyn. Did you ever see when he was on celebrity rehab? Yeah, he was horrible. It was hilarious. Celebrity rehabhab is like, He got in shape. Oh, he does run the treadmill. Like, trick your foot. Oh, really? I was thinking of, He gets partied a little too much. I think celebrity Rehab, the one I'm thinking of is the first season where you saw people melting down in ways that you're like, What the fuck? Oh, first of all, it's the worst thing you could ever covering is to broadcast them and all their insecurities to the world. You have people shit on each other and insult each other. Dr. Dr. Drew hosted that show and it led to one of my favorite stand-hope bits where he said, uh, Dr. Drew is to science. I forget what it was, but he was like talking about he's like, that'd be like being an OB-GYN that only specializes in hairless, stinkless norwegian pussy. He's got a lot of money. He's got a lot of money. [2:22:06] He's got a lot of money. He's got a lot of money. He's got a lot of money. He's got a lot of money. He's got a lot of money. He's got a lot of money. He's got a lot of money. He's got a lot of money. He's got a side of Hollywood. Well, you see them be like, I don't keep that money. That money doesn't keep coming in. That's like the Jesse Smolette thing where you're like, you wonder how many of those people that are on drugs hit that moment, they're like, I have to do something crazy to get back up. They're all too celebrity rehab. Like, I'll be the victim. What do you do if you're that guy if that guy can't work he's got to save three babies no he doesn't no he doesn't does he though what if it fucking rules what if it's like good wow that'd be a problem what if we heard music and it was like oh yeah holy three leasing last year as a single but let's hear I mean before he got in trouble he had a bunch he had [2:23:04] a record career but we know can we hear it and edit this out of the show? We can I can just play can we just play it for just play it for us Just play in house and who what will the audience here nothing? Cut it out. You can overlap elevator me will be right back with our commentary ladies and gentlemen Ladies and gentlemen, a lit. He's been talking to us about something. Beboy Blues. He's the gay novel in 1994. Oh, it's going for that gay market. Yeah, he's got some so you're a good nut. Like this is, that's the best I could find. I would describe a bunch of charting songs in 2014. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah. So he actually is a legitimate. Yeah, songs on the Empire that were making it big. And then that's where I was looking to around 2018. It started not charging anymore. And then 2019 is when... It's when the thing happened. Is that crazy? You can follow it like that? You can go like, oh, here he is. And then now you're like, it's dipping. So we're about to see something. We're about to see a little fucking... I will say my review of the song is it sounds like AI R&B [2:24:06] It sounds like yeah, there's not one specific thing that I was like oh that was really he could sing for sure He could sing but it just feels like and and like right you know what flavor my coffee is thanks What? That's it Huh what okay cool? I know what you want to drink in the morning. Thanks. I don't know what's worse that or the open letter to That's it. Huh? What? Okay, cool. I know what you want to drink in the morning. Thanks. I don't know what's worse that or the open letter to a Vladimir Putin. That's the worst thing at all. That's one of the worst things. You're dealing with a man that's a murderer and you're ready to mow a poem about. If I was your mom, I'd fix it. That's also, how outrageous. Great shit topic. receive an a mom. now we looked it up i think we look to the bottom of the fire i don't think she's a lot of makes it funnier it is probably the best piece of shit talking we have against Vladimir Putin could biden or trump either one of them talk shit to them they want to put this woman being like just a self-important actress being like i mean it's how you would have done nothing can stop hot actress energy [2:25:04] uh... it's just like. Yeah, it's an removable object versus. Some mentally ill people are also hot. This is the Harvard Crimson. They were just satire. Oh, okay. Oh, if I was your one. That's one of them. Single-handedly stops war in Ukraine. If I was your mother. Imagine, imagine, imagine. I give me like best case scenario when you put that on TikTok is this really does go viral. It gets to Vladimir. It gets to Vladimir and you see him crying in the cremlin. Someone slides it across his oversized desk. And then she gets a phone call from Russia. What's going on? What is this? I wish you and my mother could you still be my mommy? She goes, who is this? And that's how it tricks her into moving to Russia. And then he's got a new bride. Yeah. And now we have a- She is married to me now. And that's their meat cut. That does sound like a rom-com from the 90s where it's like, she's an actress. He's a bloodthirsty dick-danger. What happens when a poem goes viral? It's their sleepless in Seattle. [2:26:05] I didn't watch the, I watched small clips of the Tucker interview with Putin. Oh, it just, what did you think? It looked, I mean, did you see what Putin said about it? Did he, he was like made fun of how softball of an interview it was. Oh, did he really? He like made fun of Tucker to the Russian press. He went, I prepared, I think the quote was something like I prepared to be challenged. Oh, interesting. I was prepared for them to come at me. Yeah. Because I guess you're right. Someone in his inner circle is smart because he was clearly got his balls busted for all the ranting he did. Putin says he prefers Biden to Trump and Mox Tucker Carlson questions. Wow. Which again, this could all be a siop because he's a, you know, how he moves in shit. He said Biden is more predictable. The lack of sharp questions. Yeah, it said it through him off because you could tell someone busted his balls for how long he ranted on shit when they're like, what are you talking about? Interesting. And it said, yeah, he was, he was expecting them to But here's the other part of the quote that people aren't using scrollback up again. He said [2:27:10] He goes I think that He said between Biden and Putin Putin said without hesitation the current US president was more experienced predictable an old school politician But added we will work with any US president who the American people have confidence in Like Why isn't my besides preferring Trump? He says they work with anybody. Yeah, that's what I mean He says this guy doesn't say unreasonable things Well, he just says stuff that you go like he says stuff that's smart enough that you go like oh, yeah, okay Well, that's not a real like Kim Jong-Un is like the stars have told me that I'm the leader and you're like you're fucking moron And Putin says stuff and you go I mean it's not completely incorrect. Well, he's very intelligent Yeah, the guy worked for the KGB. Yeah, it's like a CIA operative being our leader and they're like hey I know how these fucking things go have you ever seen when he talks about how many US presidents he's been through and [2:28:05] about how they all have these promises and then once they get into office, he goes men with coats like mine sit down with them, not with this color tie, you know, and they tell them exactly what you're going to do. Like it's cool to see because he's telling the truth. He knows what he said. He's on the other side of it. He's on the other side of it, but it's not a lie. No. Like, said it's... And we all know that. Yeah, no one, like Obama, one of his things was to help whistleblowers is like a part of the website to get him elected. Yeah. It's like protection for whistleblowers. They were like the worst for whistleblowers. I did, I'm telling you. They all, he knows that all presidents left or right are just the same arms. They are the arms to the same monster. He knows how they work. That's what he means by Biden's predictable when he goes back. I could fucking, it's like, no one had a drive an old car. Exactly. I fucking had one of these. I had to throw in a reverse. We were saying that those Chinese weather balloons, [2:29:06] those flying over things, those big balloons. Yeah. That they were doing that when Trump was around, but they didn't tell Trump. That's hilarious. He's Trump would shoot him down. That's hilarious. He's just fucking down. He's just fucking down. Yeah, they're then fired. shot of down like he's fucking launching missiles into the sky. Well they threatened world war that's always the threat either side pushes on the other where they go like world war three is coming. You ever see the dude who tells the story to the news about the missile that the jet that crash landed? Have you seen this? No. There was a jet or a pilot ejected from the jet. It like some fucking super expensive fighter jet and it flew into the ground and this one dude was there when it happened. This dude's like super country. I love it. It's hilarious. I had a chance to talk to a man who lives out here. He told me he actually heard the plane as it was flying past his house and crashing nearby but he didn't know what it was. [2:30:03] I'm almost...I'm 12 to 6 out 26, I'll be seven, two years old. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. I love tight. I like speech. I like who's living about two miles away from where he grew up. Normally it's pretty quiet, but on Sunday afternoon. I was in the bad room taking a shave, and I heard it. I thought that was going to go a different way. I thought I'd be between a screeching a whistle. Oh, I said, what in the world is this? Pause that. I need that as a clip. I need that as someone to cut that clip where he goes. I think people have already sampled it in rap songs. That's a fucking mean drop. out. White says he didn't realize it was a plane at the time so he didn't call anybody. The first thought came to me, I thought that must put to the meteorite coming out of space or something. [2:31:10] And I said, well, if they're out playing, it need to be reported. But the thing was flying just too low. So he got to be eating it. I said the helicopter was out of the hotel walking. Chopper's keep flying around. It was something like somebody must've robbed the banker. He killed something. I love he doesn't put it together. I walked up there. It told me it was about the plane. The F-35. Damn, dude. That is possibly, I love the beginning of the interview. He goes, I've been on this earth about 72 years. It's love a guy that states how old he is at the beginning. With a straw hat off. Yeah, he goes, nah, I ain't seen them shit. In the country. But I'm having a shave, which is definitely code for a shit. He was taking a dump in that plane crash. I'm taking a shave. Oh! I said, what in the world is this? I'm on it. I'm on it. Wow. Yeah, dude, that fucking rules. What if it was a cover story for a crash UFO? That's what I mean. I mean, I want his explanation on you. [2:32:06] It's like, it goes, tiny little gray man, they seem mean. I think they lost the jet though. They knew the guy ejected from the jet. And they lost the jet. It was reported that the jet was lost before the sky reported, and they found out where it slammed. Two or three days though. Yeah, Doc, because I Because I remember reading that new story about a lost jet and you're like how the fuck do you lose a jet? Yeah, they're cuz probably got low body fat under there. Is that what that is guys probably shredded He's working out. Yeah, maybe like a dude is just out there works out all the time. Yeah, he's taking off He's just shredded. Yeah, just old man ripped. He's like a old Rambo as you ever seen those old dudes that work out in the park on those monkey bars and. Yeah, dude, up in the hall. Yeah, and the gymnast bars, the various different height parallel bars. I did this. But do you guys. These guys are insanely fit. So there's this one old dude [2:33:00] that does it on Instagram that I follow. Well, I've met back when I was getting out of the waiting tables, days, is about 12, 13 years ago. I did a series for Yahoo called Manson, which sounds so good. But it was, they would have me do different weird shit or whatever and I went up to Harlem and did an episode with these guys and they were like showing me the shit they could do and it was unbelievable. Like, oh, there it is. Yeah, the bartenders. Yeah, I see. How did you, bro? Dude, I am a full alcoholic at this point. Very hungover. Dude, this guy would do stuff. He would do, and then I would try to do stuff, and I'm out of shape. So my arms are doing like the stabilizing. They're doing same shit. He flagged poles. Yeah, he would like lift himself all the way up and then all the way back down with like not even breathing it. Just try doing the monkey bars back and forth a couple of times and see how hard it is on your forearms and your grip strength. Especially at 40. Yeah. Like look at this, they can just do stuff. [2:34:00] But that just shows you also like their physiques come from entirely from body weight. Yeah. And you, like, look at gymnasts. They're some of the most fucking rip people alive and it's just all body weight. Yeah, it's no weight lifting. It's just that. Pull ups. How hard to pull that? Yeah. Like, it's crazy. It's crazy muscle. That's why. Part core guys are crazy strong. Yeah, have that kind of control. Oh for sure for sure. Now I could do that if I got up there I wouldn't do that. I could flip around if you fall your fuck. Yeah, especially in 40 I could take a fall to think I have a rubber floor there. It looks like which is nice I hope you a little bit still not good being out of shape and trying to do that in front of them Those are just like little liability places Like this is almost liability, yeah. I would like to know the insurance on like city playgrounds, like the legalities of what they have to be like, you're not doing us. And is there some stuff that's grandfathered in, like those domes, iron domes? Those funder domes? They're like monkey bar domes. [2:35:00] Like there's chips all around, you'd be inside of them and shit. It's fall. Yeah. Today used to go this place in Denver when I was a kid called Big Fun, and it was like a Discovery Zone kind of thing, but they had these rubber straps. It was called the Spider Web, and it was these tight, thick, like that wide, that thick, across, but like dozens of them all the way up, and you would climb through disaster. When you fall, you'd go through these like straps slapping you in the back of the neck, you would come back with like lacerations on your arms and shit, it was the most fun I've ever had. And there's zero chance they would do that now. Just rubber straps and be like, climb to the top. Yeah. And there's like a good 20 feet tall. You know what they do have still too that I'm kind of shocked they still have, is those trampoline buildings. Those are awesome. They're gonna go in them and it's just trampolines everywhere and everyone's just bouncing from one trampoline to the next one. Yeah. Yeah. Dude, this guy, very funny comic Damien that opens, he's open for me, He used to do slam ball back in the dead. And he showed me. I remember slam ball. He just brought it back this summer. [2:36:05] Yeah, they brought it back, but now they do it with contact. Or I think you used to be able to do it with contact. What a wild I did have basketball with trampolines. It sounds good on paper, but your knees are like, dude, I can't do this. Oh yeah, it's gotta easier to land on a hard floor. I bet you have to do everything totally different because you have two different things going on You got trampoline jumping and then you have running on a court. Yeah, you're going back and forth to both of these things That's probably really hard to do. Yeah go from But is it actually better to see people fly through the air like that? They can do crazy. I mean, is it better? What's baseball for home runs? Of course, it's a story by one of the states. They get to do crazy, crazy dunks. Yeah, but you can't even dribble in the center. Yeah, who cares? You know what kind of half do though, right? Like how much traveling happens? Well, they take as many steps as NBA players do now that Euro three step. What are you allowed? It's like, they call They call it a year-old step. You're basically allowed what three steps I think it's the NBA apparently [2:37:05] There's like a two and a half step rules a gather step dribble that people can take and pick up Go like one two and then run There's a few guys on Instagram that break down these crazy plays and be like This is not a travel and here's why and they take five minutes to slow motion to show you why it wasn't I got here crazy early and I was on my phone in my car watching highlights of this dude on Twitter that they're starting to call him cream, cream Abdul Jabbar. He's a white guy from Indiana State. This reporter Matt Ross called him cream up. Cream Abdul Jabbar. And he's a white guy from Indiana State. Let me see what his name is. I think I have it still on my phone. He's on Twitter. Oh yeah, dude, he rules his name is Robbie Avila and he's like when you see this guy you're like oh he's just a big fat white guy with glasses and then he just balls really he just balls out and he's at Indiana State. Yeah I love it. I love a goofy white guy. There he is. That's him. Yeah. This guy had 35 points [2:38:02] last night. He's putting it up. Yeah, really? Let me see some highlight. This guy could fucking go. He plays like he's playing with kids. Like that's how he kind of looks sometimes. He's right there down on the key right there. Yeah, up and in. And he just looks like if he showed up at the playground, you'd be like, he's probably not that good. And then he just fucks shit up. Those goggles are fresh too. Yeah dude, I love it. He's got those old school Kurt Rambus glasses on. I love a guy that has Horace Grant up top. Those glasses probably help. Oh yeah, it's like Ricky Vaughan and Major League. You can finally see the strike zone. I wonder if you can really see everything. Yeah, but look, you can dish. Wow. I love a goofy, big white guy that's great at basketball. That's why I love Yo-Kitch on the Nuggets so much. He just looks like he should not be good, and he's awesome. Wow. He's not trying. Yeah, he moves slow in that way where you're like, but he's precise. But he's just like, I Bird. Yeah, Larry Bird you're like. And also the Larry Bird is they say arguably [2:39:07] the greatest shit talker of all time. That he was like other tier level of shit talking. He would apparently show up to like, remember when they had those free throw competitions and he said, this was coming in second. Oh yeah, he said that at the all-star game for the three-point competition. He goes, who's gonna be in second place? There was one And I don't really know how true the story is but list, you know Joe list is a huge Celtics fan huge Boston sports guy He told me a story that Larry bird It was like the 86 season and they were he was lined up on a guy and Larry bird hit three shots in a row They call a time out and he comes back on the court and he tells the guy he goes Keep believes they're gonna give the ball to McCale I just scored six straight points on you and they're given the ball to McCale And I went what and then they play happens in McCale scored and the bird looked at him as like I told you Like he's just so good. He's like, yeah, I'm not getting the ball in a mat about it. This guy is [2:40:06] You got so good to be able to talk that. LeBron tells the players on the other team what they're doing wrong sometimes. Really? He's like, you're supposed to be over here. That's wild. You're fucking, hey, move. He knows what everybody's doing. He's basketball knowledge is at the level so far above everybody else on the floor. He most coaches also. Do this. What I love is in sports where someone calls something out in the middle of the play There's two examples of the NFL that I know where Peyton Manning gets mad at his tackle for missing a block and he's running He's where he's on the cults and you can hear him go god damn it And like he like yells the guy's name in the middle of the play and still has the play done But he like in the middle of the play goes like you fucked up and like screams it out it's fucking hilarious. You wanted the best versions of that. Yeah. Max Holloway was fighting Brian Ortega. Yeah. And he told Brian Ortega you got a block like this and he puts his hand up to help him block. In the middle of beat his ass. Oh fine. He takes his hand he goes put your hand right here. I mean do that that. That won't get me to see this watch. Look watch this. Look he puts That, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that Wild. That was like when Kabeeb got Connor in the corner and was talking to him. [2:41:25] Yeah. That was. Let's talk now. Let's talk now. You're like just getting elbows hammered on you and you're like, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh Yeah, that's a different kind of human being. Yeah kind of human being that can do that successfully for a living Yeah, yeah, and it's a big one come in make it in Miami. Yeah, big fucking card. You're excited. Oh, yeah It's a big one. There's one fight. I'm really excited about Dustin Poirier versus Benoit Sendeni Okay, Benoit Sendeni was a French special forces guy who now fights in MMA and it is [2:42:06] Merkin people like he's a straight-up killer. I mean he looked at that chest tattoo is fucking tough He there was one of the fights that I Called and I'm interviewing him afterwards and he starts talking about I like America You helped us out during World War II. Thank you very much for bringing us back He's talking about America in terms of like military, like that we've always been kind of aligned. Yeah. And I'm like, that's how he's thinking. Yeah. That's a problem. He is a killer. He got into MMA to be better as a soldier. I think you already had a judo background, but the But the MMA thing is fairly recent. It's been like six years of belief or so. He's 13, I saw his record, he's 13 and orange. He's called the God of War. Yeah. That's bad ass. He's a fan of God of War, that's bad ass. I think the fight he lost was at a different weight class too. I think he fights at 155 and I'm pretty sure, should check on that. I'm pretty sure his fight that he lost was at 170, but he's very good man. He's very good. And he's calculated and he doesn't have any weaknesses. [2:43:07] He's very good on the ground. He's very good standing up. He's just good at. If he wins that fight, does that elevate him to a shot at the title? Well, it's a big jump. He's a big jump in competition. And this guy goes from beating guys who are pretty good, good fighters, solid fighters to the top of the heap, Dustin Poiret. A guy who's been interim champion. It's a different level. And for Dustin to accept that fight, it's a big risk. And Dustin must've got to pay a lot of money to do that because that's crazy. Saint Denis favored over Dustin Poiret. Dustin Poonese favored over Dustin Porje. Dustin Porje who is fought fucking everybody. Yeah. Everybody. The guy beats Connor twice and he's still the underdog against safe Denise. That's insane. That's how scary that dude is. I like the Michael Pages fighting in UFC. Kevin Holland Michael Pages fun. I don't Michael Pages from the vent, like he's fun dude. [2:44:03] That's a real fight. Yeah. Michael Page from the vent like he's fond of that's a real fight. Yeah, it's a real fight because Kevin Holland is fucking dangerous. Yeah, he's fucking dangerous and he's got a lot of MMA experience, a lot. And he's very good on the ground and he's got ridiculous one punch power. Yeah. And that's also a welter way fight where Kevin, I think is that is most dangerous. At 170 Kevin is so fucking you do like spinning back elbows and shit like I know Michael page from watching like his highlights if you go to Michael page Michael Venom page before he was ever in the MMA fighter was a high level karate point fighter and I was always wondering like when are those guys going to make their way into MMA because we had this one guy, Raymond Daniels, who was also an opponent of Michael Venom Page in a karate thing. But there's a video you can watch with that, and then competing in a karate tournament. What's the guys at that, those high level karate guys can move in and out very fast? [2:45:02] Is that what they're like, superpower you would say is is they're just like, they're just crazy in and out very fast. Is that what they're like superpower you would say is is they're crazy in and out and can nail you with shit. They can cover distance much faster than everybody else because their game is all about touching you once. Yeah. So it's just it's like you're playing a game of karate tag. Yeah. It's probably the biggest name to call it though. It kind of is like that. Like to make it sound safer. You want to play karate tech? You just get kicked in the fucking head. But most of the times guys don't even get knocked out. They just get touched. It's a lot of like this, like this kind of thing. And then when someone does touch, make contact, they separate and they call a point. Now it's based on the very ludicrous notion that one strike could kill someone. And. So you wouldn't want to be hitting anybody more than once. Yeah, you could do one hit or quitter shot. Yeah, so this is like based, you know, they started these tournaments based on that idea a long-ass time ago and they keep doing them that way. But the skill that you get from that is the ability to close the distance and hit someone. Look at that crazy jump in wheel kick you do. Yeah. That was a 3, a 720 degree wheel kick. Look at this. That's crazy. [2:46:05] If you're in a street fight, right, and you see a guy take a karate stance, yeah, there is a chance he's gonna hit you with one of those. Most likely. That's a one hit or where you take that shot. But if you're a wrestler, you go, I'll just get him straight. This is gonna be great. You're gonna kick me. Okay, how many time this? And then I'll just say, I'm gonna tackle you on a concrete fuck face. That's why that, that, that, that, that Dagestiny and wrestling thing. Wrestling is the number one foundation of all martial arts. Yeah. I think if you don't know how to wrestle, you can't fight. You have to know how to wrestle. You okay bro? What happened? I'm still coming over to this allergies for my son. You son of a bitch. You guys COVID. It's COVID, it's the new COVID. Give it to me. Even guys like Alex Paheda, who's one of the most devastating strikers to ever fight in this sport. He had to learn how to wrestle before you could fight in MMA. Yeah. You can't just go in there and not know how to defend yourself. It's just too dangerous. I remember the old school when they did James Tony [2:47:05] or Randy Couture. Oh yeah. And you're like, they're Randy Couture was like, well, I'm not gonna stand with you. Yeah. They were like, you can't wrestle at all. Randy ankle victim. Yeah. Which is like embarrassing. He just dropped down and grabbed his ankle. Like, sit your ass down was fun to watch. He was actually nice to him. He could have tortured him. He could have proven a point and just stayed on him and punched him in the face as long as he wanted to. But that's why I liked to compete because to compete just did that to the top guys that could wrestle. Guys that could wrestle were like, who's watching someone fight a shark and get broad into the water and you're like, he's just got you. Yeah, I mean that's what Poirier said about him. I just couldn't believe he's doing that You're just so good the guys at the top level are like I can't even fuck with this guy I'm all by this dude and he's talking to you and Poirier tried for a guillotine at one point time almost had it I'm a yeah, that was pretty tight. I watched it has a nasty guillotine was that fight in [2:48:06] London or it was I think I remember watching why do I remember watching it in the afternoon. I do not know. But I remember watching that you're like always got no he does. Oh, it was just in gays. Was that the last fight? Gage. Gage was the last fight for with Gage. Did he catch Kabe in a something? I think he tried something and then all the time. I try and go. A guillotine was a Gage. Am? Am I remembering it wrong? I thought it was Dustin Porya, almost had a Giyotin. You probably know more than I do. I just remember. I get them confused though too. Being high at Helium in Philadelphia during the day and they're like, we'll put the fight on here and I was like, that'd be awesome. What gover from the hotel? The story was that he actually likes Gagey. Porya. It was Porya. So here it is, he gets him in a guillotine. This is pretty fucking tight dude. It's pretty fucking tight. And it would have been much better if he had that right knee engaged. See how it could be just steps over that right knee. He just alleviates a lot of pressure there. But there's still a tremendous amount of pressure on his neck. But the key thing here is Dustin tried to scramble and re-engage, but he never got that right knee in play. He kept that right knee from being in play every time. See how he pushed it down and gets sideways [2:49:06] that alleviates the pressure from the hips. So now the hips aren't squeezing down on your lower back anymore, which accentuates the pressure on his back. And now he's out. Yeah, he's out. It was the whole key to that. If he was in full guard there. Look at how scary it is. Then all of It's like shit, shit. Well, that's the problem with pulling guard for a gear. Right here, right, and then he just switches over, and then that's just gone us back. And it's also Dustin needs to take a break here. He just exerted insane amount of energy trying to close the deal. So when you're trying to close the deal on a gear team, your whole body is involved. And you're arcing into it and, you know, and he didn't have the leg, man. And then he just, he didn't have that leg. If he had that right leg over, and that's why it could be, that was his number one priority, it wasn't even defending the choke. Have you noticed the number one priority is moving over that right leg? Yeah, it got over him. Because as soon as someone has a guillotine like Dustin does and they have two legs and you're really trapped, it might be night night because they're pulling down on your lower back and then they're up on your neck and [2:50:05] Twisting it to the side. I'll be trying to talk You're just fucks Bill That that was what I was saying last night where you get choked at changes your voice That's just how fucking good could be was yeah, he's so good He's almost a tragedy that he never wants to fight again. Cause he doesn't, right? It was like the promise he made his dad. It's beautiful. It's made his mother. He's gonna have one more fight and that was gonna be it and it's beautiful. Like that's a great way to go out. And that was just a badass coach. Yep. And he'll be one of the greatest town for pound. If not the best ever, he's definitely in the argument. There's the argument is mighty mouse, who's always had a special place in my heart for when he was in his prime. Yeah, when he was in his prime, mighty mouse was a mother fucker to watch. He would do shit that no one could do. He would do shit where he would throw a guy into the air, suplex him, and then catch an arm bar [2:51:06] in the middle of him being in the air. I just saw that clip. And finish it on the ground. I just saw the flying arm bar. There's not a champion alive that can do that the way Mighty Mouse did. Yeah, you like toss the guy in the air and then on his way down through him in an arm bar when they both hit the mat. Bro, when he fought Henry Sahuto the first time, it was a master class. It was a master class. When he put Henry away. Yeah, when you're... This is his last fight. That was the fight with the fly. That's a great fight too though. Show that, show that, that, that, that KO. Because it's a flying knee. And this is a guy who had knocked him dude. Dude the head. Walk away. Walk away. Look at that timing. Oh my god. When you're watching this cage side, and you see a guy like Mighty Mouse do some wild shit. Yeah. Are you just like as a fan of the sport, you're calling it, but you're just like, does it take your brain a little bit to process like what the fuck magical it's a magical it's like [2:52:06] i know how hard it is to move that way so when i see a dude who can move the way he does i'm like that is so fucking beautiful so for for someone who does work yeah look at this fine bar against ray board so in the middle of the suplex he catches the arm before the dude hits the ground that's right before the dude hits the ground caught the arm and then he swings over and get now he's having fun here. Yeah, he's having fun for him to do this He's like I'm gonna show off and if you know Demetrius He's a fun dude. He plays a lot of video games stream stuff He's a really sweet heart of a guy you would never imagine to be that good. He had a German simple act people up. Indue a fucking, you know, WWP. I'm gonna move it into a fucking WD. In the air. And this was a fight. And he was just lighten this dude on fire. Like he was just lighten this dude on fire. He's, I maintain that he is the finest expression of martial arts. [2:53:00] Yeah. I've ever seen it. Because it's creative. It's just, he didn't have the kind of competition and the men aren't as big. But if he was welterweight, he would be no question the greatest of all time, no question. He was so good, dude. You gotta look at them when they're in this window of time. And sometimes it's just a few years where they're accomplishing things in a way that is so extraordinary. You go, I've never seen anybody better. And that's how I feel about Mighty Mouse when he was in his prime. And then the other one that's like that is Anderson Silva. Anderson Silva when he was in his prime. All the defenses, the title defenses that run? It was a way he was doing it too, man. It was like he was operating at a different speed than them. He was processing things with a 2024 computer. And there were some windows 95. Yeah, the way he would dodge punches all the time. And then I also loved, he was part of the reason I wrote that joke about translators in the ring afterwards, because his voice was so soft and he was like, [2:54:01] I was so nervous. He was just an important Portuguese. And maybe like Anderson says he'll kill all comers and anyone and you're like but it's voices so sweet his voice was like When he when he beat rich Franklin to win the title. Yeah, Ace eight isn't it. Yeah, Ace rich or rich ace Franklin He looked like Ace Ventura a little bit like those were my mushroom days where I just take a ton of mushrooms and watch you up See Those were my mushroom days where I just take a ton of mushrooms and watch you up see Oh, dude it was did I got robbed when I lived in Tucson because I lived with a weed dealer And I got fucking hog tied like gone on 45 on the head like Leaned out. I did the whole story on Ari's there was the season already got fired But this is not happening. But I lived with a weed guy and we got set up and I was just the roommate. How hard did you in the head? Not hard, I had to pretend that it was harder because the guy was like smaller than me. So I had to pretend that he really fucked my shit up when really he just kind of dinked me. And then he was, I mean, he was a pro. Like he had an get an army duffle bag zip ties you like had it had like a real gun like I like [2:55:06] I had a cheap one guy was two guys got both me and my roommate and they you know they knew we were college kids both guys are guns oh yeah hammers dude 45's I think I think both of them had 45 caliber like he was tappeted on my head being like you're gonna fucking die white boy where's the fucking money and you're like I don't fucking know. And then, so I got robbed, and then I got out of it or whatever, I was fine. I wasn't physically hurt, they took my car, which had six loads of laundry in it, so I lost all my clothes. That sucked, wearing a bathing suit is underwear for three days, because I was so broke, I couldn't afford anything I lost my CD booklet. Do you ever get the car back? Yeah, it cleaned out Where was it and the desert that's what happens in Tucson? It's all happened in Tucson and they called me and they're like we got your car and I was like is my I said a bar and Tucson police called me and they go we found your car and I go was the CD booklet in it and then guy goes no [2:56:02] Like you look me found your fucking car That's the thing We used to carry CD books in our car at a sip one dude. That's right. Two fifth ages dude. I had pages of bands I had a whole sound garden page I don't want your vana page with all the way to fucking dude and you had to keep the you keep the CD thing for Inside so I looked professional right did I had a banger of a CD booklet that got taken? But then that night, they're just like, not digital, I won't own my media. But I went to my buddy, Sunder's house, and I took like probably three and a half close to four grams. And I was drunk before I took it. Oh boy. And Mark was sober and he let me in and we watched the first season of the ultimate fighter. Oh wow. And we had it on like, do you rob while you're watching? No, this was that night, but it was like hyping me up or I was like maybe I would have pulled, I was on mushrooms. So I was like, maybe I would have pulled, [2:57:01] I wouldn't have pulled shit. But I was like, and then we watched that till like five in the morning, but I was just tripping, being like, watching, I was like watching UFC on mushroom trools and I thought it was just a cool, so I did it a couple more times. And I was thinking the last time I did it was like, Lesnar, Shane, Carwin. Oh wow. Cause I was like, oh, he's from Colorado. I always loved Colorado fighters. That was the closest Shane had come. I mean, he really came close to beating that guy. Yeah, that watched him. I'm not a man who was pounding him. Oh, I don't know much. I was drunk at hooters with Lewis. Oh, that's funny. I was drunk at a midtown hooters with Lewis because I was yelling out Aurora and then fucking Shane Carwin lost and I was like, ah, because he gasped out. He gasped out, that was it. He emptied the tank to end the finish, Brock. And he wobbled him. He was on top of him. Yeah. But Rayne bombs down on him. A lot of referees would have stopped that fight. Really? Yeah. Watch it, watch it. Let's watch the first, the end of the first round with Brock Lesnar I was out with her at it. Shane was a terrifying puncher. Terrifying. He was the only guy in the UFC [2:58:06] that they had to have gloves bigger than Brock Lesnar's. Really? Yeah, they had like four XL gloves. Cause I remember when Brock came to the UFC, they were like, they have to make his gloves bigger. Shane's are bigger. Really? Bro, Shane's hands were like, bad ass. They were like, canned hands. Shane was so dangerous man. Like people forgot about him, like in his prime, he could put anybody to sleep with like a six inch punch. He was so fucking dangerous. And he was a really good wrestler too. Yeah, and a Colorado guy, so I love him. He's a fucking beast too. Was he in the Greg Jackson gym with all of them? Uh, I believe, well I know he's out of Colorado. Yeah. I think he trained with Jackson. Yeah, but this is at the point where he's already gasped. Yeah, this is at the point where he's gasped and this is the second round. Yeah. This is when Brock wins. Can you go back to like the first round? No, I'm at the end of the first round. Oh yeah. So this is it. So go a little bit before that so you can see how this takes place. Cause like he stuns them on the feet. [2:59:07] So they're standing up there? God listen to that. Oh! Look at that upper cut. That upper cut was nasty. He's stuffed to take down. Bro, Shane was so dangerous. So dangerous. I thought it was really hard to take down. It's tough to take down. Bro, shame was so dangerous. So dangerous. I thought it was over right there. Look at this. It could have been over right here with a lot of referees, man. A lot of referees. Don't have to be a feeling where you have Brock Lesnar and then you don't and you go like fuck. Look at this. look how close this is So he's getting fucking pummel dude and this goes on for a while the thing is [3:00:02] Shane right now is emptying the tank cuz he thinks he's got the clothes he's at the end That's what he thinks yeah This goes on for a while dude, dude. He's going on look at this Big shots like right there stop the fight right there you can stop the fight But Brock is still pushing him off, but he's not really effectively defending himself Like many referees would have been like I've seen enough like right here the blood spray in many referees But no, I don't remember this fight that well. I just remember that Shane Gast. Yep Oh my god, dude the feeling of having someone almost knocked out and they don't call it but it gets worse look It gets worse. So now he gets, I think he fully mounts him at one point in time. Like who is this? Look at this. This is big dude. These are big fucking shots. That's a big elbow. Yeah. But he's tired. [3:01:00] You can see him breathing heavy. Yeah. But now he's just looking for one big shot. I You can see him breathing heavy. Yeah. But now he's just looking for one big shot. I mean, dude, the way he has him, I've never seen... I mean, he's beating the fuck out of Brock here. But now, those aren't effective. Yeah. But the referee could stop the fight, man. This is fucking close. This is one of those things where the guys getting beat up so bad, you could make an argument for stopping it. Look at all the blood, the Brock is fighting back. Shane gets on top of him again. Brock can't get up, right? He's getting mulled here. Now, but Brock's saving energy doing this, right? Like he's not. Well, I mean, he clearly had the better gas tank because he made it out of this and then the second round, he was fresh and Shane was done. Yeah. But Shane right now is done. Yeah. He's done. He's so tired. You have to understand how he has nothing in his arms. He just exerted everything. But he emptied the tank. Have you ever seen a fight where a guy does that and then wins by using his legs or something? Most of the time when guys emptied the tank that bad, they can't recover. [3:02:01] So it's just they're done on everything. And so look, Brock is scrambling at the end of the round and he's back up and he's just, now he's up. Now he's up. Damn dude. If someone stands up like that, especially a Brock Lesnar against you, you go like, fuck. And Shane is kind of breaking here. Like he's really tired. Like I'm breathing. He's just trying to figure Brock's not gonna let him recover, because if he's defending constantly, but he's still breathing heavily, and then he's not gonna be able to get his win back. This isn't just, it seems like no one's doing anything, but he's got to fight Brock often with that overhook. He's got to do something to keep him, right now he's not doing shit. Right now he's just hanging on. And Brock is catching his breath too. So Shane doesn't even have his hands clashed here. He's literally not, he's not digging that overhook. He's really needed a break here. So and Brock knows this too. So Brock recognizes that he's exhausted. So Brock knows probably also that this is the end of the round and he's going to make it out of this. And so then when he comes into the second round, he knows this dude's toast. [3:03:08] Because there's a level that you get to where you're so exhausted like you're not gonna be okay in a minute. So here's the second round. Do you think when he sits down or when he comes back out right here he's like, oh fuck. Oh you can see him breathing. Yeah he's already exhausted and Brock looks way better and Brock is gonna just set it up. Look for the moment but he kind of knows the chain's toast right here. Then then he eventually shoots. Jesus, man. That's something where you just want to be like, let me go home. I'm just fucking zapped. So he's moving away from the shots now. Looked out, I tell him to like, get the fuck over there. This is good for both of them too. It gives him a chance to recover. So he swung in there, tried to land a big bomb. Do you think it's similar in any way like being at a job where you feel out of your depth where you're just like, fuck, I'm done. I thought this was it. You know what I mean? Like, there's a shot. So he gets on top of him and eventually arm triangle. Submit some. Yeah, so he's just out here. [3:04:05] This he gets him in the arm triangle. I mean, is this this is a heavy pressure head and arm choke heavy pressure. Oh, yeah. Oh, fuck. He's got to push with his elbow. See how his hand is right there. Yeah, but he really needs to do is what's called answering the phone. You put your hand in between Brock's head and your ear so he tapped. Yeah. He's done. The defense and it's not the best defense but it's the only thing you have is to get your hand like this. Hello. Yeah. Hello. Hello. Because if they just have this like completely locked up, yeah. You're fucked. Jesus. You gotta get a little bit of space. Our future president Brock Lesnar. You gotta get a little bit of space our future president Brock Lesnar Isn't that in an idiocracy the yeah, it is Forward WF champion. Yeah, they would that would absolutely be we'd hit the accuracy I just watched idiocracy about a year ago and fucking holds up. It's my judge He's by the way office space still holds up amazing it all [3:05:01] Greatest movies of all time. Beavis and but head's still funny. Yeah, amazing. King of the Hill, everything the guy does. He's unbelievable. Beavis and Butthead, when I first moved to California in 94, was this shit. Yeah. Couldn't wait for Beavis and Butthead. It was the funniest thing on television. It was great. Connobleeos. Connobleeos became Connobleeo and he Dude I was in middle school and it was like everybody was doing beevison butthead impressions It was like hey where they like you just hear the weird kid back like that rules Yeah, you're like oh Jesus Christ made being a degenerate dirtbag fun. Yeah, yeah Yeah, the movie was great beevison butthead do America. Let me see what he doesn't he gets so he gets too much syrup He's just drinking all the soda yeah guy rolls [3:06:03] I love that I remember going to see the movie like I Love that I remember going to see the movie like Waiting like wait like getting friends together and be like Friday Friday Friday night We're gonna go see Beveson but I did do America. I haven't seen the new ones are there new ones. Yeah, they're doing new ones Are they good? Did you like them? Cuz they watch TikTok stuff now now they don't watch music videos They watch like what we would watch and make fun of. Oh no. Like that poem, they would watch that. It was great. Perfect. Yeah. What's it on? Paramount Plus. Oh okay. It's like buried on one of those streaming services. I have that one. Go watch it. Cause that's like where South Park is. They're old now I mean, there's I think some of it is dead. Oh, oh they The show I really want to watch is Ronin on an FX You mean show gun show gun. Yes. Yeah, show gun looks amazing. They put the two I think there's two episodes out right now. I'm gonna watch it tonight after shows [3:07:07] What streaming services that it's on Hulu? It's because it's FX. Yeah, it looks sick. I remember the original. Oh really? Yeah, the original was amazing. I didn't know there was, I didn't know it was Zoreemake. Yeah, there was an original show, show gun. I'm way back in the day. Very excited for this. I mean, yeah, it was show gun. This looks awesome. It's based on a novel. Oh, it is. Yeah. Okay. I love FX does random shit sometimes and you're like, this is awesome. This is some great shit. Yeah, they do some great shit. They're kind of like what HBO used to be. They did the shield. I'm gonna shield. Yeah. That was a great show. The shield was very good. Michael Chickles or whatever. Yeah, so Shogun American Historical Drama Limited Series created by Rachel Condo and Justin Marks based on the 1975 novel of the same name by James Clivelle. The novel's previously adapted into 1980 limited series. Yeah, that's it, 1980 series. Click on the 1980 series, who was in that? [3:08:00] Oh, shit. So this was starring, who's the guy? Can you find it? That's your Chamberlain that right that's right. Can you find it? Uh this is like when they're letting white dudes play Japanese guys. No he was a white guy. Oh it was supposed to be a white guy living with the show guns. Oh like kind of like the last samurai. Exactly. Okay. Basically like the Tom Cruise movie. Yeah, did you just stole that? I Was like That's totally lifted yeah like the one white guy fucking kicks asses of summer like good luck and we're watching that we're going Yeah, bro. They were raised to sort fight you shut your fucking mouth. You're gonna lose an arm Instantly you're gonna lose an arm and then the rest your life gonna Like and you're and you have no honor. Yeah, cuz we're a dickhead and they cut your arm off Dude have be a fucking and they decided not to kill you and just leave you with no arm, but dude then they shut off Contact with the outside world and then all the show gun fell and shit and everyone was like yeah I'm gonna tell you're advanced by like a hundred years now. Whoops in Japan was like [3:09:05] Forgot about bullets. We got to catch up. Well they didn't want to use bullets too right? It wasn't an honorable way to kill you. Yeah, it wasn't a big role. It wasn't a big role. It wasn't a big role. It wasn't a big role. It wasn't a big role. It wasn't a big role. Yeah. They're one of the only successful cultures that believable. It's a video game about the Samurai's and the Mongols. Yeah, it's about the invasion of Sushima Island by the Mongols and you did you learn four different sword styles and you change your sword styles to play do this game I've played this game I want to say three or four times completely look at their graphics. It's unbelievable And it's open world so you ride your you ride around and then you'll duel Mongols there's there's also no difficulty level right supposed to be pretty hard you can change the difficulty Yeah, you can change the difficulty level. That's awesome. You go around you get armor You learn how to duel but you start off after they lose the invasion And then this is the actual game or this is the game this is the cutscene But then that's the real game. That's what it looks like when you're riding through. [3:10:06] It's unbelievable. Holy fuck dude, this is amazing. Gin Sakai. You could stumble upon a camp. That's what it is. And then you fucking sneak attack. Oh my god. Right there they have this, what you do. So you can do multiple assassinations and do it. It's anyone I've ever, anyone I've ever told to play this game comes back and they're like that's fucking unbelievable. This is insane. Ghost of Shima rules. Oh my god. And they said they're due for a sequel because this came out a couple years ago. Flaming arrows. It's unbelievable. You do so much shit that you're like this is the coolest thing and then you have one on one sword fights with Ronins and shit. Like your best friend is a Ronin that betrays you and you have to fight him in an awesome sword like big sword tools It's awesome. Whoa, and your uncle is Kind of like runs it, you know, and you have to either you choose if you go with him or against them It's fucking rules Wow, dude. It's easily my top three in my top three video games [3:11:02] These games are so next level. Well, they're movies that you play now. Yeah. And they're more compelling than movies, because you're a player in it. Like last of us, Tannaco is just like, his not as good as the game. Like you play last of us, you're in that shit. Or like, got a war. They'll never make it into a movie, but you play it as a game you're like this is so fucking fun. You just get into shit spider-man 2 the video game is better than Real video game. I'm a nerd Joe. Yeah, you're a junkie. I'm a shut you fucking right? Spider-man to I mean rag-narock it's unbelievable Spider-man 2 is better than any spider-man the video game is better than any spider-man movie they've made Wow, it's it's as a comic book fan, it's better than anything they've made. You can't do it. Baldur versus Crados. Fucking insane. It's not as fun as doing gay of war. God the fucking... He's like, I want a suck boy. Boy! I'm gonna suck you. Is that what they do? [3:12:00] No, it's just makes fun of that Shane and I used to do this thing Yeah, that's what game, huh? That's a cut scene Yeah, that's where you fight them They're look out reds you can't defend does he have magic? Yeah, it's all about this shit You fight you basically fight against Odin and everyone of like all the Norse gods and they find out that you're a former Greek god. Oh. It's awesome. It fucking rules. Where that red dead redemption two came out. Shane and I were going the road together. Let's take a shit on the road. And we would do this. He would joke that I'm such a nice guy. He's like, what's your demons? Like what do you do? And I was like, it'd be funny if I like jerked off homeless guys and that's what came out about me. So Shane and I would do a running bit where we'd do a homeless guy be like, Hey, watch out buddy. You're about to make me come. And it's just me being like, shut up. I'm gonna fucking jack you off. He's like, Hey man, what are you doing? Shane and I do that for weeks. And then I was out of the country and Red Dead Redemption 2 came out and I just got this voicemail from Shane that was so excited, he's like, [3:13:06] dude, if you played Red Dead Redemption 2 yet, I'm like, now I'm not home yet. And he goes, Arthur Morgan is our homeless jerk off voice. Oh my God. The main character of the voice is a guy going like, well, hey there. You know, we're gonna like, dude, that is our homeless jerk boys. Oh jacky off under the hey mister. That's another game you can do wild shit to people too. Wild shit. By the way it's a game you can play four or five times and not find all the stuff. Like they they put that much work into it. We're there like no this is this is layered. You can go on treasure hunts and shit that you would never find unless you like win after. You don't ever wonder if you're like killing too much time doing those things. All the time, dude. All the time. Give you anxiety. Yeah, but I also level it by like, all right, if I'm gonna spend 30 minutes writing jokes, then I could play like video games for two hours. Hahaha. Because I'm high. What else am I gonna fucking do? Well, that's good. If you get a quick drinking word my video game Went up makes sense feels the time dad because honestly like one in the morning. I'll hang out at the seller till like one [3:14:09] And then I'm like Time to go kind of home play video games. Yeah, I want to go smoke a fat bowl and play fucking ghosts is to Shima So it's that's the new grand that thought I think about the pleasure that that kind of technology gives people People that they're they're live suck, but their video game lives are awesome. I get it. And it's the joy you get is real. Yeah, you have to deal with post video game, post nuts syndrome. Yeah. You're like, wipe it off your belly and you're like, why is a Greek God fighting a life as bullshit? Yeah, I fought four, but it is, they do incredible shit. and that's why it's like it's moving away from Movies and shit where you're like your spider-may movies are really cool But when you're actually spider-may and you're flying around New York City and then you got to go fight Fucking venom. Yeah, you're like this is unbelievable. Wait, wait, it's unbelievable [3:15:02] Yeah, and then they're gonna write it as virtual. Yeah, it's drugs. Yeah, the heavy drugs. Heavy, heavy, heavy. Heavy, and you better believe when I get to my hotel and say it in Tania. Dan Soda, you're the man. Dude. Thanks for being here. Appreciate you, you're always fun. Dude, I'm excited to work. Mother's ship this weekend. Yes, I'm excited you're going to be there too. That's fucking pumped. And then telebodies social all that stuff. Got a new special out on YouTube called on the road. It comes out March 1st, which is I think today, but at Dance Soder on everything, subscribe to my YouTube channel. I got a podcast called Soder just having comics come and sit on my couch and bullshit for an hour. Yeah, man. And I'm on the road. I'm on the road so danceurter.com Beautiful. I'll be out there. I'm real thanks brother. Appreciate you. Bye everybody