#2108 - Tom Green

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Tom Green

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Tom Green is a comedian, actor, musician, filmmaker, and podcaster. Catch him on "The Tom Green Podcast" or live on tour in 2024. www.tomgreen.com

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And we're up. What the fuck is happening Tom Green? Yeah. Yeah great to be here man. Man made it back made it back Last time I saw you. I don't know my eyes might have been a little crossed That well last time I saw you last night Right, that's That's true. That's true. We'd start with that then. But the last time we saw each other on a podcast. Yeah. Things went a little westward. We got a little intoxicated. So, absolutely. So, you know, the whiskey kept pouring, the whiskey kept pouring. And that was when I was, I had that van. So I was, I'd still have the van, but at the time I was kind of living in the van, traveling in the van. So I drove here. Heavy COVID, this is like the beginning of COVID where it was like weird to be around each other. Like, are we okay? We got tested, okay? Right, we did, got the COVID test, and then I had the van out in the parking lot, and we started drinking the whiskey, but midway through the show. And then the next thing I know, I'm opening my eyes in my van and it's the next day. And I'm just like, oh shit, what happened on the show? So I think maybe the last half hour of the show was such a blur. I don't really quite remember getting the van, But I had a nice sleep in the parking lot. It was amazing. And then I kind of was a little nervous about like, geez, what? That's a weird feeling when you... Don't know what you said. Don't know what you said. Yeah. And I called my mom. And everybody seemed, you know, like it was, people thought it was funny, but I mean, I think she was a little concerned about the drinking, the amount of drinking, but no, that was a great time. But I'm not- It was fun! Yeah, it was a great time. It was fun, so we got a little off the rails. You didn't have to go anywhere. No. Your van was parked. [2:00] It was awesome. It was awesome. It was awesome. What is it like sleeping in parking lots? That's gotta be an odd thing. Well, I rarely did that in the van. It was mostly out in these remote desert parks, like out in Bureau of Land Management Land, Beale Landland in the desert. And I was going around filming. And so I wasn't, but there was a couple of times I'd sleep in a truck stop because I was wanting to make a lot of distance. So I'd drive until I kind of couldn't keep my eyes open. Then I'd pull over at a truck stop and sleep between. Sketchy proposition, right? You don't know who's around. Yeah. Well, in the desert, it's a little more nerve-wracking because you're all alone out there. And people can see the van and the distance. and it's a pretty nice van. And the aliens come too. Uh-huh, yeah. We're all alone. I was hoping for that, but... Nothing? No aliens. I had a nice flyover from a US fighter jet in the Trona Pinnacles, in this amazing part of desert in California. Oh yeah. And I was the only person there, [3:00] and I could tell this fighter jet saw me, and just kind of came in right over the van. Oh wow, just to say hi? Yeah and I didn't get my camera out in time. I flew in one of those ones. Yeah, yeah. With the blue angels. Oh yeah. Yeah. God, it's insane. When you realize what those jets can do and I think what they were flying was like an F-A-18. See if that's true. Nice. Yeah, I think that's it. Mm-hmm. That's what we did and Believe they are actually I think they have even more capable jets now because this is when I Want to say this is like 2003 to something like that way back of the day. I have a plaque, you know It says you flew with the blue angels pull major G forces. I've never been in a fighter. Yeah, I did I think I did six and a half G's Something like that and I stayed conscious But then I blacked out when I forgot to do the hooking on a lesser run Like it was lesser it was like for G's or something like that forgot to do the what's no I'm sorry you when you're [4:02] When you're going through high G's you do a thing called hooking I think that's how they say it when you hold on to the the joystick Or you can hold on to your straps on your legs if you're the pasture like I was like this And you're literally forcing blood into your head to stay conscious. Yeah while we're doing this I'm feel that's what you're doing. See how she's doing that? Nice. See how she's doing it? Yeah. So this is how you stay conscious. That's how you stay conscious. You have to force the blood into your fucking brain. It seems like it's kind of slightly on the edge of not being a perfect system, right? Like, well, you gotta be a bad motherfucker to fly those things those guys were all lifting like all those blue angels piles they're all jacked like super diesel yeah because these guys are just fucking they're wrestling with that thing yeah like it's not as simple as like your tool to do your like the physical force of going to six G's is so extraordinary [5:06] You haven't felt anything like it in your life when you're and these guys can go to like 13 G's some of them Yeah, I don't think I fucking insane. I don't think I would want to do that actually I would probably just I sometimes Don't want to do those kinds of things. Do you know? Yeah? Yeah? Yeah, it looks it looks amazing. I just feel like I'm glad I did it. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah, just just as a wake-up call, like you think you understand you see a jet and I think of it almost like well obviously like driving a race car is very difficult, right? But driving a car fast is not that difficult. You know, like if you have a good car, if you buy a new car today that handles really well. You can, if there's no one around, you can go pretty fucking fast and it's really in control. But those things are different, man. It's like, there's a physical experience. It's so fast, there's so much power and force behind those things. You got a plane yet? You're getting a plane, Joe? Oh, fuck that. No. [6:01] No, Bill Burr pilots. Bill Burr flies around in a goddamn helicopter. He took me up around downtown LA. You can fly wherever you want in a helicopter. Yeah. Helicopters are even more of a no-no for me. Because they seem to go down a little too much. I've been in a few. I flew in a blackhawk through Baghdad and did one of those USO tours. Went to stand up over there back in 2003. How was that? That was a pretty, pretty wild experience. It was right before, like it was probably fortunately for my nervous system, right after the mission accomplished banner and right before shit hit the fan with the IEDs. So I was kind of thinking, oh, it's okay, no big deal. And we were over there in the green zone and we were flying around in the Blackhawk helicopter. One night they said, you wanna go out on a night patrol in like a tank and I was all set to go. And then they had to cancel it because of some sort of attack. And then we started hearing there's some stuff happening. We were there for a few days only, but they started avoiding stuff on the road [7:06] and the Humvees. And then the second I got back to stateside, that's when it started to get real bad over there. But I did a few of those. I did Afghanistan as well and was on Chinook helicopters. Oh, wow. Because my dad was military. So that's why I'm rocking the Canadian Army jacket. Canadian Army. We've got an army. I heard recently. Recently heard about it. They didn't fight too hard against tyranny. Here we go. No, it's, well, we did. You know, actually we fought pretty hard against the Germans. I mean the internal. Yeah, oh yeah, I know, I know, I know. Internal government tyranny. Yeah, it's fun. I watch your show all the time, Joe. So it's like, I know I'm a very proud Canadian. Tom, you're the granddaddy of the show. The granddaddy? Well, yeah. I don't know about that, but I mean, you are. First of all, you've always been very nice to, you know, give me a shout out about those early days of broadcasting in the living room, huh? Well, dude, you're an awesome guy [8:06] I've always loved you. You're always cool to be around and you also Your show in 2007 when I went on your show that was 100% a major inspiration For me to do this because I remember thinking oh my god He figured it out like I remember I very clearly, like sitting next to you on that chair going, dude, this is it. Like this is it. All you have to do is figure out how to make money with this. Yeah, you said that on the show. Yeah. Which was hilarious, and then you figured that out, yeah. Yeah. You really figured that out. That's cool, that was the's amazing, though. I remember when we were doing it, I had, you know, I always wanted to do a talk show when I was growing up. I love Letterman, right? And I'd done my show on... You were great at it. Yeah, I really did enjoy. The first show was more, you know, me out in the street doing crazy stuff, [9:00] and then we did a talk show, which was a little bit more of a sort of a nightly show, a little bit more time to talk. And I did love doing that when the show stopped. It was right at the time of technology changing on the web. And that was kind of always kind of how I was kind of looking at technology usually, because when I was a kid, I was in a rap group and it was from technology Right, I remember drum machines came out and we were listening to public enemy and one of these sounds You know how do you do that right and then I would go work a summer job? I'd buy a Sampler and a Kai s 900 sampler and a tari computer and it you know I'm making beats in my parents basement in Ottawa,. No one's making beats in Ottawa, Canada. We started this group called Organized Rhyme. What year is this? This was, well, we started in mid-80s. So this is all pre-internet? Yeah, pre-internet, yeah. Yeah, this was high school. So how are you finding out about all this stuff back then? Well, that was friends at school. We're listening to rap music, so friends at school were like, hey, you got to check out Public Enemy, you got to check out Boogie Down Productions. [10:08] I'm like, Boogie Down Productions, then you get someone to give you a cassette of like the criminal-minded Boogie Down Productions bridges over album, and you're listening to it, and they're rapping about Scott LaRocque, they're DJ, who'd been, you know, unfortunately, you know, passed away in bad circumstances He was shot and killed and then you're listening to this sort of that was the internet to me You know, it was rap music and skateboarding thrash or make magazine was skateboarding You'd read stories about skateboarders in California in a magazine You'd listen to rap music and hear stories about you know people who are not in Ottawa You know doing doing cool shit. And I was kind of wanting to get up on stage and perform. I was trying to dabbling with stand-up at Yuck Yucks and the Comedy Club in Ottawa. And so... When you say dabbling? Well, I was doing stand-up. I was doing stand-up. [11:01] But I never really got to really a level where I was kind of, I was doing it every week. I was going down every week for a couple of years. And actually the reason I stopped was because the rap group got kind of sort of a record deal basically, and I kind of went and focused on that for a while and stopped doing stand-up. But yeah, the club in Ottawa, Yuck Yucks in Ottawa, still there. It's moved, but it's owned by Howard Wagman, who's, Yuck Yucks is kind of like the improv of Canada. You know, it's a chain all across the country. Mark Breslin, I'm sure you know Mark, he started it, and it's kind of like, it was wild because like, I don't know, it was something about the 80s, the 90s, before the internet, right? You'd go down to a comedy club and you'd find out about stuff just through word of mouth, like the rap music and like comedy. So I would go down to the comedy club and I remember Norm MacDonald come through and [12:04] he was probably 25 years old, right? And I'm 16 in the audience and then I got to become this huge fan of Norm and he was Norm, but back then there wasn't a lot of people doing stand-up like Norm. Like there wasn't this sort of angle of sort of this absurdity to it, this sort of, this sort of, there was a more of a structured down the middle way of doing stand-up back then. And so Norm was this sort of \u2013 It was a curveball. Yeah, it was just sort of curveball and we just couldn't get enough of it. So every time we was in town, we'd be down there. But Howard Wagman told me this story about Norm and the first time he came down to do stand up at Yuck Yuck's in Ottawa and he got off stage and he was Disappointed and how it went Norm was he said never doing this again He walked down the street Howard Wagman chased him down Spark Street and Ottawa said no that was great You're coming back and he made him come back and the rest is history Norm was a legitimate genius [13:02] Yeah, like a genius of life like like a rare specimen like Genius in not not just that his comedy was brilliant, but just just like look at this I've never seen this before. Mm-hmm. Like a totally different kind of human. Yeah, you know and Genuinely always funny like every conversation was funny every conversation was funny. He was just funny. I was on plane with him accidentally twice. Nice. Twice. Must have been amazing. Twice on two separate occasions. Just totally random. We sat next to each other and play him like, whoa, this is crazy. Yeah. And the last one, it was so funny because he was telling me about how he quit smoking. Yeah, I quit smoking It's a fucking turns out it's real bad for you This whole thing about quitting smoking and he's were talking about it like how hard was it to quit this whole thing? The moment we land he walks into the gift shop buys a pack of cigarettes and he's lighting them before he gets out [14:04] Yeah, I go I thought you quit he goes like dead and all that talking about it made me want to smoke Yeah, it's probably all an elaborate setup right he probably was planning it the whole way Who knows he probably doesn't even smoke he was just doing as a gag. No, he was he was he was well He was into gambling too, right? So like people that have those kind of like impulse control issues like gambling is a big impulsive thing All of it that's that kind of wild crazy sports gambling too. That's not a good addiction to have especially when you have money, right? That's a scary addiction man. I watched Dana White gamble I watched Dana White play blackjack and he was down $600,000. Yeah, am I fucking hands or sweating? I just I was going what are you guys doing? Real money. Yeah. Yeah. This is so crazy. Yeah, he does it every night. Yeah, he does it constantly There's people that love it. They love it. They love the action. It's thrilling for me. It's [15:00] Fortunately, I've never liked numbers like Like math was never something I enjoyed. So when it comes to blackjack, you're going, you're doing math in my head and I get very uncomfortable. So I just, I'm not gonna be good at this. That's a great reason to not gamble. You hate math class. Yeah, I just figured I'm not gonna be good at this because I can't even really add up what I'm supposed to be doing here quickly. So I'm just sitting on the side. Plus, I'm cheap. I don't want to lose money. Not a math person either. It's a concentration thing. It's like if you concentrate on math, really got good at the basics of it, and then really started getting into more complex mathematics. It'd probably be very fun. It'd probably be very exciting. But the problem is I never concentrated in high school at all. I didn't pay attention to it. So I'm so Removed like if people start talking about math like complex shit. Yeah, I checked out at long divisions long division I checked out like our calculators available. They're pretty much every right right and aren't there's like an unlimited supply of batteries [16:02] I'm like right now. This is what I'm wondering, you know, now with our phones and our Google and everything, like we don't have to learn any of that anymore. I don't know anyone's phone number. We don't really have to learn anything anymore. I know like Eddie Bravo's phone number. I know my wife's phone number. I might know two other numbers. Yeah. When I was a kid, I had a hundred numbers in my head. Yeah. Mm-hmm. You can call your grandmother. I still remember my phone number from when I was a kid Yeah, you could call your friends. I could say it now, but that person probably wouldn't like that very much I got my phone number memorized from when I was in high school. It was our first phone number I couldn't believe we had a phone number. I'm like wow. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, but that's we had phone numbers before but there was the first one that I've remembered and then we that was the first answer machines too Right that was why remember you would you if you want if you're out and you're trying to meet somebody and they're gonna meet You and then they don't show up and you want to figure out where they are You'd go to a payphone put a quarter in it Yeah, all your phone and then put your code in and check your answering machine or your voice mail from like a from the And you thought you were living in the future. And then they would leave a message [17:05] on your answering machine to tell you, oh, sir, I'm gonna be a little late. And then you hang up and then cost you a quarter. But yeah, that's how crazy everything's changed. And such a small amount of time. You were gone. No one knew where the fuck you were. Absolutely. There was no Snap map. Kids today, they look at each other on snapchat maps where they all know where they are at any moment in time. There's no shenanigans. Yeah. No, I was thinking about like how when I was a kid, you know, we would be able to very easily manipulate, you know, the situation with my parents and say, okay, I'm going over to my friend's house. Right. I'm going to Bobby's house. Go drinking and skateboarding all night. Yeah. No, that was better like that. These kids today, they're tracked. Everyone's tracked. It's not your parents, it's the government. And we're not going to be able to really get rid of it now, too. That's the thing. There's no way this is going to turn bad. No one's ever gonna decide this has gone too far, it's just gonna keep escalating and getting worse. [18:06] And my eyes are getting bad because I'm sticking, I find myself addicted to the phone as much as I know that it's happening. I'll get on that TikTok and I just start scrolling through stuff and then, oh shit, like two hours just went by. You know, and my eyes are getting blurry and it's really kind of starting to... It's useless. Piss me off to be honest with you. Yeah, for me it's Instagram. I don't have TikTok, but I use the Instagram reels. Oh, God damn it. It's so nuts, like one after the other. It's so interesting watching this mad scramble of people trying to figure out a new way to get your attention, whether it's through like shooting a bow and arrow with your feet over your head at balloons. Have you ever seen those gals that do that? They stand on their hands and they have a bow and their feet and they have their legs all the way over the top of their head and they draw the bow back with their feet. I saw other things kind of like that but there was no bow and arrow involved. [19:01] But yeah, yeah, yeah. This is a thing. Yeah, yeah, that sounds good. That sounds good. Are they wearing clothing as well? No, why would they be wearing clothing? Oh, okay, cool. Yeah, no, I have no idea. They're bikinis, they're hot. Most gals with that kind of mobility with your body, they're probably pretty hot. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. How did you not have a hot body if you could do that. If you could get your butt over the top of your head and have your legs pull a bow back and then aim it and shoot it, what? I certainly can't do that. Who the fuck can do that? I mean, what percentage of the population can do that? See, and this is kind of, I think, where we started with us was, you know, how did I find out about rap music? How'd I find out about norm? You know, we had to use a certain sense of creativity and we had to go out of our way to find out about stuff Right, you know and and and so it it Sounding like some couple of old guys here. We are a couple old guys complaining about that's what we are now [20:02] How the world was better before but I don't think the world was better before. Yeah. There's... There's some aspects of it like that I think forced us to be just a little bit more creative and think out of the box because we were, or at least in a different way, because you'd go find some drum machine or you'd go down to the little comedy club in Ottawa and, you know, stand-up comedy wasn't a mainstream thing then. It was pretty big, but not in Ottawa. It was sort of almost like you felt like you were going somewhere that you weren't supposed to go. You go down in the basement. It was 16 years old. I'm in a bar. There's some guy on stage and they're not talking about Norm MacDonald on television yet. He hadn't gone to SNL yet. He had. I remember I'd see him and my friends would see him and then we'd go to school and we'd tell our friends, you've got to go see this guy, Norm MacDonald. He'd come every three times a year and every time he'd come we'd be there and it was just like this sort of myth, it was a mythology to it. Then all of a sudden we heard he moved to Los Angeles because he was writing for Roseanne and we all heard about this and it was this sort of, you know, all the, you know, the amateur comics, the [21:06] you know, up in the kids up there and doing it. Well, I guess I was the kid doing that. Everyone else was kind of in their 20s, but in 30s, but everybody was just kind of like, there's hope. We can, we can get out of Ottawa, man. You know, so, you know, and, and, and then SNL and everything. It was just amazing to watch him do that. But I was having a good chat with Adam at the club about Norm because he was, of course, famously his sidekick on the show. So it was such a shame to see Norm disappear like that. He was talking about coming out here too. Yeah. Yeah. So much has happened since I was here last. I got a lot of stuff I wanted to, first of all, before I start talking about me though, I just wanted to say thanks for having me at the club this weekend. My pleasure. I'm so stoked. The club is amazing. And it's been hanging out there for the last two nights and I came in a little early and wanted to hang out and just settle in and man it's just such a vibe there it's just such a perfect perfect [22:10] comedy club you did such a good job you're the only guy that brings his dog everywhere that's not annoying maybe ever yeah yeah well maybe ever yeah yeah and everybody loves Charlie yeah everybody loves Charlie could be a Charlie Charlie's in here with us now. Yeah. Yeah. Charlie's a sweetie. Charlie is, I got Charlie right before I came here the last time. She's named after the John Steinbeck novel, Travels with Charlie, because I was out in the van and that book's about Steinbeck in the 60s, made a camper van out of a pickup truck and he drove across America and he wrote a book about America and its differences. It's called Travels with Charlie in Search of America. And I got Charlie at a rescue called Thrive, is the name of the rescue, which is actually run by Jimmy Durante's daughter in San Diego, the entertainer Jimmy Durante, who it's like [23:04] a ranch in San Diego and they bring these dogs in from from the Bahamas and Mexico called potcake dogs and Charlie anyways we we went out in the desert and everybody loves Charlie like you said there's Charlie Charlie looks like she was just taking a nap yeah what the fuck you wake me up but I was just taking a nap the funniest thing is Charlie actually goes on stage with you we should tell people yeah she just chills out up there I just kind of take her gotta be so weird when you're killing yeah that noise she's she's she's kind of used? Yeah. Yeah to be in the Bahamas. Yeah, and then all of a sudden She's on stage with Tom Green. That's right. She left she left this chair and she's just sitting there like what the fuck is this? Yeah, yeah, I'd look at her sometimes and wonder she left at five weeks old the Bahamas So that's that was she got out of there five weeks old and then was in San Diego She. She got adopted by somebody else for like three months basically. [24:08] And then they couldn't keep her. I got her at three months. And it's funny, she grows up in the Bahamas. Then she goes to California. And then I moved back to Canada since I was last here. And I left Los Angeles following in your footsteps. The exodus continues. It wasn't just me, man. I keep getting labeled as a Pied Piper or this, but come on, everybody was leaving. Yeah. I gotta say though, there was a lot of factors to change my entire life. I sold my house around the time right after I was here. And that was the house that we did the Tom Green show for. That I owned for 18 years, that I did the WebOvision show in, WebOvision we called it. Why don't you do a show now? So I'm actually, I'm building a podcast studio in my barn. It's in an unheeded century barn. [25:05] And you're can heat it? Nope, not gonna heat it. No, you're gonna have conversations where you're freezing it down? Yeah, we're gonna wear really warm jackets. That's one thing that's cool about Canada, like people talk about the cold and how fucking cold it is up there. But the cool thing about the cold when you kind of get acclimated to it is you can kind of regulate your temperature like you wear a really warm Arctic jacket in the barn while you're doing the podcast. We probably move it in at some point. Also, you can die outside. You can die. Yeah. It's a different thing. Yeah. Yeah. It's a different thing. And it makes more resilient people. Yeah. I think it makes better people. I really do I was I was thinking about how you do there's the barn Yeah, you're freezing your dick off First of all, why don't I dad that's my dad there. Yeah, so yeah if you know what you should get sponsored by like one of those Like heater body suit companies yeah for deer hunters when they sit in those blinds. Yeah, that's if deer hunters when they sit in those blinds. Yeah, that's cool. If deer hunters, when they sit in tree stands, you know how fucking cold you get? [26:06] Yeah, yeah. See, if it's cold out, that's one thing, but if it's cold out and you're not moving, that's another thing. Yeah. That's another thing. You could be, it could be fucking zero degrees, but if you're hiking, you're fine clothing company, Baffin' and they make the warmest jackets, right? So it's like, you can really regulate your temperature, right? And that's the thing, like, if you know how to do that, because I, I got, I, it's been a lifestyle change. I bought, I got this farm. I'm on a farm now that I live on and basically, I'm gonna live there now for the rest of my life. I know it. I'm never gonna leave this place. I love it so much. That's awesome. It's a wilderness area with... I enjoy your videos from there. Looks like you're really enjoying it. I am really loving it, you know. It's just it's just such a piece of mind to get up in the morning [27:02] and I've got this mule and I got my strap there on the side. Yeah, I got my mule. And this is a whole new thing, Joe. I mean, I don't know. First of all, I didn't know anything about horses and mules, but I got a mule and a donkey and some chickens. So a mule is a cross between a donkey and a horse, correct? Yes. Isn donkey and a horse, correct? Yes. And I did not know that a year or a half ago. They're supposed to like the most resilient animals for like riding trails and stuff. So mules are, so yeah, it's sort of all, it all started with I found this property and this farm and I wanted to be outside and then there was these two old barns there and I would look at these barns and I'd say, they were kind of calling for something to be put in them. They were 100 years old, their stuff stored in them. And so some friends of mine and I, we kind of cleaned up the barns and we, I got this mule and this donkey. And so initially the idea was, I thought a mule would be kind of funny, right? [28:06] Because they got bigger ears and they're kind of, I was thinking three amigos. I was thinking a donkey. I was thinking a mule was a donkey. I didn't even really know that much about it. But, and I started looking for a mule that you could ride and there's not that many mules in Canada. They're much more of a Southwestern, you know, American thing, you know George Washington bought brought mules to America. It was a big part of you know, then settling America What they would use him for farming brought them in yeah, he was instrumental in being a big part of getting mules here They would use them for you know, harvest and you're pulling, you know Harvesting crops and doing all the work around the farms and stuff. They have also been used in war a lot. They've been used in military. So- A lot of the pioneers preferred them to horses. Yeah. They're extremely strong and they're very, very smart. They can go longer without water. Longer with- yeah. They use less water, less food. [29:01] My friend Clay Newcomb is actually a mule expert. Okay. He's been on the podcast before He talked about fancy mules and like how you pick a mule and train in a mule. Oh, I want it Oh, I follow him actually I follow clay clay's interest on on a podcast called the bear grease podcast Uh-huh, you know, it's a lot of it is about bear hunting in Arkansas. Oh, nice. Nice. It's just interesting like outdoor stories. Like he's a very, very interesting guy, but he just knows a ton about mules. Well, the thing that's so crazy about them is they're extremely smart to a point that it's, you know, people say stubborn as a mule. It's not really stubbornness. What is it? What is it? Self-preservation? So they figure out Basically, I'm riding this animal now. She's a very big mule as you can see. She's a very big mule She's called 16 three hands is the way you measure horses and mules and she's as tall as they get her mother was [30:01] Horse so a horse, so a Persheron paint mix. So it's a Persheron's work horse, almost like a Clydesdale. So she gets her size from that and her father's a mammoth donkey. And she's 10 years old. A mammoth donkey? Yeah, a mammoth. What a great name. Yeah, yeah. It's definitely created a very large, strong, serious animal. I want to see a picture of a mammoth donkey. Yeah. How big are they? There we go, yeah. Yeah, so you can sort of see. Whoa, look at the size of that fucking thing. That's a donkey? Yeah. Holy shit, dude. And you can ride those too, so. Ha ha ha ha ha ha. And that's. But our donkeys hearted between 912 pounds. Are donkeys harder to train than mules? I'm not sure of the answer to that. But I know that mules are easier to train than horses, so I would assume because they learned the couple. And mules are sterile. They're sterile, yeah. So a... It's a hybrid animal and it can't breed, which is is isn't that fascinating that like a male of one species can breed with the male [31:08] Another species they make an offspring. It's alive. It has testicles that has sex drive it has everything can't breed So weird so the horse has let me get this right I've been I've been trying to learn as much about it as possible because I'm riding this thing And I don't want to die because you can fall off it and it's not fun falling off. I've fallen off a couple of times. Have you really? Yeah, I wasn't too bad. By yourself? Up there in the middle of nowhere? Yeah, it was my own fault. I was streaming on Instagram and not paying attention. That's so good for beginners. Don't let go of the reins and play with your phone while you're riding on a 1400 pound mule, Fanny's 1400 pounds. That's fucking huge, man. But yeah, I guess though it's a horse has 64 chromosomes and a donkey has 62. And so when they breed, they take one of... It ends up that the donkey... [32:01] The mule has 63 chromosomes, which is not an even number and therefore makes it sterile. So this is what I'm trying to... Oh, so that's what it is, an even number. Something kind of complicated like that. Isn't it fascinating though that nature figured out a way to stop everything from fucking everything and just getting it pregnant? Isn't it like nature's like, we gotta have a system in here because that's just that's untenable that's gonna lead to chaos yeah like if humans imagine can you imagine humans could get things other things pregnant is so everything would be a hybrid of a human that everything yeah like we are a lobster human hybrid somebody would do that you know island fill with turtle people walking around with exoskeletons going hey this ain't so bad you're gonna be on the island. I can't believe someone fucked a turtle. Yeah, and there's gonna be this guy like with a turtle shell on Fuck you. Yeah, he's gonna be mad at you like I'm just saying cuz people are insane Insane, I mean somebody has probably fucked a turtle 100% someone's fucked a turtle, right? [33:01] If you had a bet everything you own be sure 100% turtle. Right? If you had to bet everything you own, 100% a guy somewhere has been hopped up on some fucking Vietnamese street meth and fucked a turtle. Of course, yeah. Probably American guy from the Southwest over there hiding from the law or something and he's met up and he fucked a turtle. Yeah, people fucked everything. But no result because of the nature has made these protections, thankfully. The wildest hybrid, of course, is the Liger. Yeah. Because they, they miss the gene that regulates size. Yeah. They, they don't have the same gene that like a tiger and a lion does. I've seen those. I forget which one, how does it work? Is it a male lion and a female tiger or a male tiger and a female lion? I forget which one it is, but in that combination when they make a liger, they just keep growing. They're so big. Yeah, I've looked at these on the internet. You know, the thing is, I guess a tiger and a lion and a donkey and a horse are close enough together in evolution to be able to [34:03] do this. And there's, I guess, no animal that is close enough to us to be able to come close enough. Because you know, they've done experiments with other primates. Or maybe we just haven't, maybe just nobody's fucked the right thing yet to figure it out. I bet someone pulled it off in China or Russia or something like that. They probably got some champ human hybrid somewhere. I've heard sort of internet conspiracy theories that there was a Russian experiment that went awry or something like this. There was this one very strange case of a chimpanzee that they call humanzi. And this chimpanzee had very human-like features and it lived with a family. I forget if it was a family of researchers, I forget the story, but they always tragically because those things ultimately as they get older. They want to be the boss It's a big male, right? They're gonna just fuck you up. They're gonna bite your fingers off or bite your friends It's always something like that. They always do something horribly horribly violent eventually But this one that they have they had them for a long time and he looked like a human. Yeah, look [35:06] It looked weird like yeah, and he stood for a long time and he looked like a human. Yeah. Look, he looked weird. Yeah. And he stood up right a lot and he wore clothes. He's got a big old donkey dick. Look at that donkey dick. Gosh. The humanzi of Orange Park. First of all, humanzi is such a great name. I mean, I almost wish it had worked just for that reason alone. Right. Humanzi. I mean, there'd be humanzies going around. But yeah, I often kind of have little. You can find the, there's some weird shocking pictures of it. Like that one in the upper right hand corner, the one, yeah, right there. And they're so strong. Click on that one. Look at its face. Yeah. It's got an odd face. Mm-hmm. And there's some pictures. I think they're probably doctor that made it a little more human looking they confuse people but The thing like as it got older see if you can find the older pictures of it. It looked real weird man Yeah, but it was just a chimp it was just a chimp that you know had been taught to behave that way [36:03] Yeah, look at how he's walking. He's walking like a chimp. He's not walking like a human. Look at the shoulders and the arms. That's a chimp. I sometimes think about the close calls I've had with a couple of times with animals where I wasn't really giving them the, not like just understanding the power they had. Like I had a chimpanzee on a show I did once on my TV show back in the day. And it was a trained chimpanzee, but massive. And I remember after the show I just said, hey, can I hang out with the chimpanzee? So it came out and I was just sitting out within the parking lot for about half an hour. Just me and this chimpanzee right in front of me, looking right in my eyes. It was playing with the buttons on my shirt. And the trainer was 20 feet away. And I just thought it was so the cutest thing. And then a few years later, I read about the chimpanzee ripping that, killing people and how violent they are. And you go, man, that is, I had a macaw at one point, which [37:02] I actually had to get rid of. Big red parrot, you know, a macaw. And I got it when it was 13 months old. And this was my biggest disappointment, I'd say, with a pet because I had gotten this macaw. It's named Rex. He was on the web show for a period of time. I was after he were on that time. And I really love this thing. And I love animals. And I was so fascinated by it because I was realizing, oh, this is a pet that I'm going to have for the rest of my life. And I was all dedicated to this. And I was really kind of somewhat moved by the fact that I was going to be having this beautiful macaw for the rest of my life. And it would pick my teeth and it would stick its beak in my mouth and literally like just kind of put its plate and chew on my ear and all of this kind of stuff. And then all of a sudden when it got to be about 13 years old, it just became a real asshole like it really, really changed. [38:02] It had been going from this little baby to I couldn't put my hand in the cage without it really biting hard and almost took my finger off. I had to go in the cage to clean the cage and I couldn't pick it up anymore and I actually had to find it a new home. Do you think it just didn't like being in a cage? I'm sure it didn't. I wouldn't like it myself, you know? Yeah. And that feels bad too. He just didn't like being in a cage. I'm sure it didn't. I wouldn't like it myself, you know? And that feels bad too. That's a thing I don't really like about having a big buck. You're a prison warden. Yeah, exactly. I started to feel really bad. So I took it back to the bird place where I'd gotten it and they said to me, oh yeah, we don't, it's been 13 years later, you know? I've been spending 75 bucks a month on walnuts for 13 years. Okay. You know, these eat a lot of walnuts. And then they say, oh yeah, we don't sell them the cause anymore because when they get to be 13, they change and they become really, really mean. I'm like, oh, you could have told me that 13 years ago. So it was like there's an internal clock? Yeah. [39:01] So it's like a puberty thing. They hit like a puberty thing, yeah. And so I feel bad, but I got her a better home. That's why it's scary to be in front of a chimp. Yeah. Because the chimp, they could just decide. I just want to fuck this guy out. I have these moments where I think about the time when that Macaulay would have its beak in my mouth. You know, just months before it could have ripped my face But the Fanny, this mule, and I have the donkey as well who was her companion for her named Kia. She was a two-year-old donkey and they, the donkey will live to be 50 potentially. And the Fanny is a big animal so she could live to be 30, 35 years old. And so she's 10 now. So it's a big responsibility. And I really kind of consider them now after having them just for a short time, kind of family, you know, it's an amazing thing. But the thing that's, I think the thing that's most interesting about Emile, let me just kind of, we won't talk about Emile's for the whole show, but you know, they are so smart [40:01] that they figure you out. So I'm new to this. So when I first got her, I was given one day of training on how to ride a horse, you know? So I learned how to saddle her up. I learned how to get up on this thing. You know, you pull the ring, you look where you want to go, you push with your foot opposite of the side you want to turn. There's a sort of little rhythm to that. And it went great for about a month, but then she started sort of figuring out that I was sort of uncertain in what I was doing. She started to understand that I didn't know what I was doing. And so she starts testing me, right? And I don't necessarily realize that's what's going on. So when I'd be saddling her up, she would move. So I'd go to saddle her, take the saddle, it's a big saddle, you gotta put it up on her back, you put a saddle pad on, and you gotta put the saddle on, and then she would move into me and kinda push me, you know? And I didn't really know how to prevent that cause she's 1400 pounds. lead her around, try to get her back in position. It became this weird sort of dance of me running around trying to get the saddle on. I'd eventually get it on. But what happens is [41:10] she ends up losing all respect for me because I'm, she's, because I'm letting her sort of be the, the leader, right? And, and so Mule really wants to right? And so Mule really wants to, wants me to be the leader. And it's hard for me to be the leader at first because I'm uncertain. So they sense uncertainty. So when I'm riding her, there's wolves at my place in the woods. Oh, fun. Yeah, I got a story about that too. And there's wolves there. I was showing Jamie before the show. There's a video of them on my trail cams. But she sees them coming out of the woods at night. She doesn't necessarily want to go into the woods. She thinks it's unsafe. It's not because obviously they're not going to attack her and me. [42:02] She's a giant mule, but she thinks that. So over time, she started to not want to go in that direction, she stopped wanting to turn left. And so what would happen is I would, I started to realize she didn't want to go there. So every time I wanted to go there, I would get nervous. I would feel uncertain, oh, she's not going to want to go there. She would sense that I was nervous and it would double down and then she wouldn't go in there. So I had to kind of get into this real sort of Sort of a psychological re-training kind of a mule intervention from the people that raised her I have so many questions Yeah, yeah, it's it's really wild it There's I've got that's really interesting the intricacy of how you how you figure this out Now did you have any training before you got a mule? I saw, she was owned by a single owner in Northern Canada in a place called Thunder Bay, which is about 18 hours drive north of me. [43:02] Wakeholder up there, she's like in Club Med now in Southern Canada. She's probably loving it. And her owners were Kaya and Lisa who have a \u2013 they breed mules. They're called Twister mules. Did you get any training? They drove her down and we spent about three days. Okay. And they showed me how to saddle her up and they talked to me about it. And I learned as much as one can learn in three days. There's the basics, right? Right. There's the basics. Did you do a lot of it when they were there by yourself? They just told you how to do it and you walked over and did it? They spent time with me for about three days. But this is kind of \u2013 they're telling me I'm doing quite well because I actually am able to handle this animal now but it's been an interesting journey the last, you know, since June I got her in June because, you know, at first it's the very first sort of on the surface way that you ride a mule is you look [44:01] where you want to go, lightly pull the rain on, if you want to go left, you pull the left lane, rain lightly. If that doesn't work, you might not even have to pull the rain, you could just look where you want to go and they feel your body shifting, they sense your intent and you have to look in that direction. Like avatar when you link up with the dragon. It's like telepathy for sure. It really is and you feel it and it's such a really cool feeling when you really get into the pocket with it. So then you pull lightly, then you do a little push with your foot. And so that's all sort of very, you know, physical stuff. And it worked fine for a while. But then, you know, I didn't quite understand the overall psychological sort of hierarchy that gets created and a trust level that's created between the mule and myself. The more I screwed up, Jesus, even in the barnyard, the more I let her get in my space. [45:03] You never want to let a mule get in your space, like gets in your space, you know, a very sort of a, you know, easy way to control that is you can just put your hands up to her eyes like that. You know, you don't even have to touch her. Right, and then they don't like, and then they back off. I didn't know that, right? So I was kind of like, I'm pushing it. No, it was like, you know, trying to stop. And then it realizes how small you are in comparison. It realizes how small I am and it realizes I don't know what I'm doing and it loses all respect. And so you start to kind of, so once you start to learn a little bit deeper about how to handle those just on the ground with her, then once you get up on her, she has a little bit more respect and is more apt to listen to you. But it was really interesting because they came back. They're really great. They're trying to bring more meals into Canada because they love meals. [46:01] There is something very different and special about meals because they're intelligence, and so it's really interesting. They came back and spent some more time with me and we went out on the trail and there's Fannie doesn't like ATVs, okay? So I've got this Polaris side by side that I drive around the property on. It's a noisy, you know, ATV, four-wheel vehicle thing. And they were driving ahead of me and to kind of instruct me, and I'm following along, and we're coming up the trail, and they stopped, and as we approach the ATV, it's parked on the trail. There's a space on the side. I'm going to ride around the trail, but in my head, I'm thinking, oh, Fanny's not going to want to go around this ATV. And we get up there and I try to turn her around the ATV by looking, pulling the rain, pushing my leg. She just stops. And when she stops and when she decides she doesn't want to go, this isn't like a little trail riding carnival horse. She gets going and will turn and really kind of get quite [47:03] aggressive in a way, which is kind of of exciting though, I gotta tell you. And I was a skateboarder, I got pretty good balance, so it was kind of interesting. But the thing that was wild about it, so then I go, well, she's not gonna want to go around the ATV, I say to Kaia and Lisa, and they say, no, no, well, it's not that she doesn't want to go around the ATV, it's she knows that you think she doesn't want to go around the ATV. You have to think in your head that she wants to go around the ATV. What? Yeah. Because when you're subconsciously, whether we know it or not as human beings, you know, we didn't always have language, right? We didn't mean someone invented language at some point. Before that, we were just kind of this nonverbal communication and energy, right? So, you get up to the ATV and if I'm thinking, oh, she's not going around the ATV. Oh, look, look, I just, my whole body just went like that. You know, I sighed, I felt like a sense of defeat, right? She feels that just through her saddle. It's not total like voodoo. [48:07] She feels like... Yeah, but there might be a little bit of voodoo. Possibly as well. It seems like there's a magic to it. It can't attribute all that to body. She feels it. She feels it. And she's so smart. So a horse doesn't necessarily sense that as easily as a mule, like quite a bit less easily. So that's why people say mules are stubborn, because they're sensing all of these little nonverbal cues that a horse might just be apt to say, oh, he pulled on the reins, so I'm going to go that way. He pushed his foot, so I'm going to go that way. And that's why also mules are also extremely, they're used in war, and they're used in Grand Canyon trail riding and things like this because you know if a horse is walking along the edge of a cliff and a snake jumps out the horse might be apt to just jump the other way off the cliff killing itself and whereas a mule will instantly identify cliff that way snake [49:03] that way danger both ways mule will kill the snake. It'll stomp out the snake. So or at least won't jump off the cliff. So it's... That's way better. Yeah, better. I think we should just all have mules. All have mules. You should get a mule. You should get a mule. I definitely would not have the time to be training a mule. It seems like that's... Here's my question though. This is the other question I've got to remember. Why would you think that the wolves would not attack the mule? Well, it's not... First of all... Because like if she's scared of the wolves... You know, donkeys... She should... I think she should be scared of the wolves. You know, donkeys and mules, but especially donkeys and mules have donkey. So they're actually used a lot as a livestock protection animals. So because they'll stomp out a coyote or a wolf. So a lot of farmers get them, put them in with their sheep and they'll actually protect the herd. So it's not impossible, but it is pretty uncommon that coyotes and in my area the wolves are not gray wolves, they're timber [50:08] wolves so they're not, you know, as big, as big, but they're big enough though. They're about the size of huskies. So they mostly kill like deer and what are they called? Deer and smaller stuff. They don't try for elk or anything like that because the big gray wolves will take out elks. Yeah, I'm sure they, you know, I think. They take out moose. Yeah, absolutely. Moose are so big, man. For a wolf to take out a moose, that's crazy. Yeah, yeah. These are the wolves, these are my trail cams at my place. Oh wow, look, drop a deuce right there on your trail cam, staring you in the alpha. Yeah knows he knows you got that trail camera. He's a Tom green check this out bitch So it's it's you know, it's the only way to know 100% for certain that their wolves and not hybrid Yeah, I know you know all about this Joe, but like the coin Hoy wolves is to do a DNA test and yeah, but uh, well if it's kind of a misnomer, you know because [51:06] Coyote is a wolf. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The reason why the coyote spread so far across the country is because they have like a built-in mechanism to protect them from gray wolves because gray wolves would kill the coyotes. Yeah. Whereas the red wolves in the east coast would breed with the coyotes and that's where you get the coy wolf. I think they're viable. I think when they breed, they can breed. I don't think they're like a donkey or like a mule rather. You mean a coyote and a wolf? I think when the like the coy wolves, whatever they call them, coy wolves, I think they're viable. I think they have babies. Yeah, absolutely. No, they are for sure. Yeah. It's not really, it's not different. Kind of like two different kind of dogs or something. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah, because I've been getting some information about this from a wolf researcher up who lives near me and he has sort of put out some trail cams and we've actually laid out some fur traps [52:09] that can get a little bit of their fur and we're gonna send it for a DNA sample to find out exactly the percentage of DNA that Wolf took coyote that we have here. Cause yeah, it's kind of, I don't know, you live out in the wilderness, you know, you find these kinds of things are, I find it quite interesting to just kind of really kind of dive into it deep. Oh, it's fascinating. You're out of there in the real wild. You're in the wild where there's packs of predators in your neighborhood. And I wish I had bear footage right now, but it's not online, but this year I put out my trail cams and I got like, I'd say a little more than a half dozen distinct different bears on that exact trail which is you know on my property right by my house. Brown bear or black bear? Black bear yeah yeah we don't have Grizzlies out east so it's just in Canada even it's all there are. Not yet. [53:01] The Liberals will try to reintroduce them. You need more things to be scared of. Well, you know. Talking about bringing Grizzlies back to California. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I want you to come to Canada, Joe. I know you haven't come to Canada lately, but you've got to come to Canada. Because here's the thing. Here's the thing like Everybody loves you in Canada, you know, so it's you got I'm coming down here. Everybody's so stoked that I'm here and Love Canadians. I just hate their government. Hmm. And sometimes here. How do you say his last name polliver? Yeah, well, it's French. So it's well, I don't think he's French but the name's French Pierre Paul Pierre Polly-Ev. Polly-Ev. That's sort of a weird R, silent R. Yeah, it's a strange, as you see it written down, it's very difficult to remember how to say it. Polly-Ev, Polly-Ev. Yeah. That guy, that guy makes so much more sense. He's so common sense in just calling out all the nonsense that's been done under this administration. It's so sad to watch. So this is the thing that I kind of, I guess, just wanted to throw out there, which is it's [54:11] not unlike here in the U.S., right? You've got Biden as the president now, right? And then you've got essentially a Democrat, we actually call our Democrats the liberals, right? And that's how unabashed we are liberal up there. We actually call the party the liberal party. It's not a bad word up there, right? They actually call them the liberals. And the other ones are conservatives. Conservatives, liberals and conservatives. But it's the same thing, you know, like half the country hates the party in power right now, just like as much as anybody, you know, and it's just a constant thing and they want to get them out. And so, you know, I just wanted to, you know, as a proud Canadian, I wanted to throw out the distinction that, you know, Canada's, you know, it's like here, it's the same bullshit that's here. Everybody's arguing about issues, important issues, it's being reinforced, you know, through [55:03] these algorithms, people get mad about it, and then they start arguing. But so, you know, like I sometimes kind of go, I wouldn't be interesting if Pierre Pauly have won the next election, right? Because in all of a sudden, we'd have a conservative government up there. And let's say Biden won down here. He got a conservative government up there. And then Tucker Carlson might be going up to Canada talking about how great we are all of a sudden, you know? They just can switch on a dime, you know? It could go back. And it has before. I've had, you know, there's been my lifetime. Joe Clark was the first conservative prime minister. Then there was Brian Mulroney and Stephen Harper was pretty recent. But anyways, I don't like talking politics, but I do. I did bring something about Canada that I loved, I wanted us. Okay. It's a good thing. I'm trying not to talk politics too much because it's like. It's gross. Just every kid's all mad, you know? Yep. I just, I don't fuck. I kind of think like, wouldn't it be cool [56:01] if the new thing became, people start to realize that the division is almost worse than what we're arguing about? Well, the division is absolutely worse than what we're arguing about. Most people want good things. This is for you and your family. A huge, and I brought one for us too, just to try. This is the freshest, best Canadian maple syrup made by my friends, the con boys, Ryan and Jason shout out to Ryan and Jason, George and Darlene, and they make this on their property. They have, you know, thousands of maple trees tapped. And this is, you know, a family run business. They've been doing this for hundreds of years. That is a lot of work. Yeah. It's a whole maple syrup, like making me, I've watched people make maple syrup on YouTube. It's a lot of work Yeah, it's crazy how much work is involved and it's it's really kind of incredible to go see how they do it because They've built these like I can't describe it properly But reverse osmosis machines where they have tubes coming, you know with the sap from all the in the spring the sap [57:07] They have tubes coming with the sap from all the \u2013 in the spring, the sap starts flowing, comes through these tubes from all through the woods on their property. It runs out to their barn where they have these machines that do something called reverse osmosis. I don't know what it does doing exactly, but they have to do it. And then it goes into this giant vat with fires, with wood burn fires, and they boil the sap down until it becomes thicker and there's more sugar content and then you have this delicious syrup but I brought a couple of it's literally the blood of trees that you pour on pancakes it is and you know what we're gonna Drink it like in shot. I just thought as opposed to drinking whiskey till we're on the floor this time I never made it to the floor sir Maintain I don't remember what happened with the... ...level of motion and the ability to conversate. Oh my gosh, okay. Dude, that's diabetes in a shot glass. We'll just do a shot, but I want you to see... This is real maple syrup. Canadian maple syrup. [58:00] It's convoying maple syrup. They're my friends the best best friends that you know that you'd ever want and It's not your manufacturers. It's processed shit, you know cheers. You have to do it like a shot. No, yeah, you can yeah, absolutely Oh my god, I can't drink this whole thing. Yeah, it's really good though pour it on some pancakes Yeah, he just makes you think like how sugar are you getting from pancakes with a pile of maple syrup? Are you getting a fuck ton of sugar? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Like, how much sugar is in, what is a shot glass? How many ounces is that? I should know this. One ounce? Let's just see how much sugar is in one ounce of maple syrup. Yeah. Yeah. God, how could you drink that? Yeah, no, you don't really drink maple syrup, right? We're just doing it for a guy. I have for fun. Pour it on your pancakes. It's amazing how good it tastes on your pancakes. No, it's good in coffee. Put in your coffee in the morning. So I keep a big jug of it. 17 grams. 17 grams in a shot glass. Yeah. And I guarantee you, if I'm having pancakes. I am drowning those pitches absolutely so I got you [59:06] I'll get you more as whenever you need some it's it's the best it's different than waffles with that on Oh, yeah, son. Mm-hmm. Lots of butter. Oh, yeah up to 20 up to 20. Okay 20 So if I'm having pancakes, I'm having 120 at least Yeah, I'm I'm poor on a bunch of maple syrup on that shit. Six ounces? Yeah, easy. Easy six ounces, like a glass of it. I'm getting in between the stack, pouring a little in there. It's just a nice little boost, a little energy boost, you know? It's for like five minutes. And then you're in a coma for the rest of the day. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. But I guess if you're out there on your farm fucking throwing hay around all day exhausted, right? I did this summer in August. We have some fields with hay. We cut the fields and some local farmers had helped me cut the fields to square bales. [1:00:06] So you're really farming? Yeah. Farming for real, for real. Farming hay for my animals. Yeah. I had 580 bales of hay off the property this year. And we had to lift it all, carry it all onto a hay wagon. See because I'm going to try to figure out a way to do it a little differently next year, but normally the farmers that have done my property for years, they've been doing it with these big circle round bales, you know? But I wanted to get square bales this year because it's easier to handle for the horses or the mules in the donkey every day. So every day I go to the barn, I pick up a bale, feed the, they eat about a bale and a half of hay a day. It's cool because like from May, June till about the end of September, you don't even have to feed them. They're just out in the pasture eating grass, which I often think about, you know, when [1:01:01] you think about vegetarians and you go, how do you put on, you know, muscle with just, and you can look at this giant animal, all it's doing is eating grass all day and they're massive. But yeah, so that, I gotta figure out a better way to get it in the barn this year because some of my friends- They have to eat it all day long. That's the difference in eating meat and eating grass. You watch predators predators eating and they sleep all day But you bought a donkey. Yeah, those motherfuckers are just eating all day long. Yeah, you have to eat all day long Yeah, oh ways eating. Yeah, there's not a lot of protein in that food It's got a breakdown and they're weird digestive tract. Yeah. Yeah, undulate digestive tract so Fanny and Kiev come from a pastor that had, you know, 20 other animals in it to this, my place where they're just there by themselves with the whole field to themselves. So Fanny was putting on some weight last summer. I have to now kind of monitor how much he's out in the pastor. I should correct myself. [1:02:00] Undulates are cows and shit. I'm thinking of like, thinking of deer. Right. The weird stomachs and stuff. I'm not exactly sure how the stomachs work on these. I don't know how those, yeah, on equines. But I know that, like, to think that you could get that jacked-eaten vegetables is ridiculous. Right. That's what I was kind of thinking. Because I always kind of... But vegans always like to make that comparison. Yeah. Like a gorilla state, nothing but vegetables. They have a totally different body. They're all different. They are also not humans. Yeah, they're not human beings. Yeah. It doesn't mean if you ate what a fucking horse eats, you'd look like a horse, you dumb ass. You're not a horse. And also, do you know how annoying that would be to have to eat grass all day? It doesn't sound like a blast. Not a lot of variety there. Yeah, I think about that. I have cookies for them. I have little, I have a vitamin, sort of a vitamin mix of, you know, that I give them every day. Is variation to their diet good though? Like for some animals when you... You got it, for instance, apples. Okay, I have apple trees at the property property and she that's one of the places she loves to walk towards the apple tree [1:03:08] There's apples on the ground so and I she always you know you can feel her pulling towards the apple tree So but you know you don't want her to eat You know a bunch of apples because that can create acid in their stomach and they can get yeah I was wondering that like what happens to them in the wild though if they find a bunch of apples? Yeah, it's interesting. Yeah, I'm not sure. You're fucked up? I'm not sure if they, I don't know the answer to that, you know, but maybe they kind of somehow self-regulate when they're left to their own. But you know, you can feed them carrots and one because I'm actually thinking what kind of variety can I give the ladies? You know so they really like a frozen watermelon to be tossed into there. I'm not kidding so and they'll just bears like that too Oh, yeah. Yeah, we went to a grizzly bear. I guess it's just like a Conservation Center where they they have these enormous plate. It's in Montana, but it's they have it's they're like captive [1:04:04] but it's really an enormous in like construction thing and the bears have like swimming pools and shit and they would roll them out these frozen Watermelons and watch them bite through a frozen watermelon will scare the living fuck out right because they go through it like it's nothing It's grizzly does that I've seen hippopotamusamus do it on YouTube but a Grizzly does that too. I think most of the time the hippos are doing it. It's not with a frozen one. Yeah, yeah, but they were saying that this bear's favorite treat is frozen watermelon. So you give them a frozen watermelon. You just go through it like it's a great. See Grizzlies are terrifying. I admit that I am also actually, probably it's probably not really a warranted or fear, but I am nervous about these black bears, you know, on the problem. You should be nervous. What are you talking about? Why would you say it's- They do attack people occasionally. They will attack you. And if black bears attack you, they're attacking you to eat you. [1:05:02] Yeah. It's a little bit different. Statistically, the odds are in my favor. I think it's not as like Grizzlies, they've attacked a lot of people. I think black bears maybe only attack like one person a year or something like that. They attack people. Yeah. I mean, there's a guy who got killed over by Rutgers in New Jersey. He was killed by a black bear. Yeah. And there's a friend of a buddy of mine's went hunting for his very first trip. He was in his tent at night and a 500 pound predatory black bear. Yeah, tried to remove him from the tent and his friend shot the bear and Accidentally shot his friend in the wrist. Yeah, so he got shot in the wrist with a rifle Mm-hmm the bear gets shot the bear runs off after it gets shot and then they don't, I think they recovered it, I think it's dead. But imagine your first night ever camping in a tent and a black bear tries to pull you out and eat you. Yeah. So I think sometimes people bring food in their tent, that's one common mistake. [1:06:01] So... Yeah, your food, bitch. Your food. Your food. your food your food in the tent Your pigs in a blanket if you're bringing like you know You should really that is one thing that is why they go in the tents a lot They smell you know someone brought their sandwich in the tent or whatever true, but but yeah, no I mean look I'm I'm right there with you. It's there's something about it though that Well, you you know when you're out there in nature and you're sort of natural instincts kicking where you feel it. Your senses. Yeah. And the fact that there is something unpredictable or that you don't understand out there is kind of exciting. Like the fact that there is, I'm not really truly expecting to get attacked by a bear, but you know, your senses are alert, you're listening into the woods. You know they're there. You know they know you're there and they've probably left. But maybe this is the one time where they're walking along with their cub [1:07:01] and you get in the wrong position at the wrong time. And so, often when I go for a walk, I have a bear spray on me. I sometimes, you know, have a rifle on me. I don't carry it with me every time I leave the house, but I've got a few rifles and that I, you know, I might, I've not really been a hunter, you know, in my life, but I kind of, so many people around me, you know, the country, everybody hunts and I think I'm gonna maybe How much land do you have? 150 acres, so it's kind of certainly hunt on that. Yeah, and there's deer and it's it's quite quite it's quite Something that I never really expected to kind of live like that, but it's really kind of interesting. And then it backs onto lots of, you know, thousands and thousands of acres of protected wilderness. So they, you know, it's, are you allowed to hunt back there? Yeah. Yeah. And on my property too. So what is the tag allocation like? Do you get landowner tags? [1:08:00] Do you get tags because you're a resident of the area? You still have to get a hunting license. So in Canada, you know, it's, if you want to get a rifle, first of all, it's completely different than in Texas, right? You can't just go buy one. You have to go take, it's like getting your driver's license essentially. You have to go take, you have to write a test and you have to pass it and you have to do a course, a safety course. And then you have to send that into the RCMP, the Canadian, you know, the Mounties, right? They review it. And then, you know, a couple months later, you get your, you get your non restricted firearms license, which allows you to go by rifle. I've been collecting lever action rifles, you know, so I've got just, you know, I'm relatively new to this, but I, you know, I, when I was out in the desert, I had a shotgun with me. I had a hunting license when I was in New Mexico, was trying to hunt some quail. Never saw a bird though, so it was, you know, I was hunting, but I never saw anything, so I didn't really do, it's, it's hard it's, it's, there's, that's why, [1:09:05] trying to think of what I want to tell you here Joe, that's why I think I really would love you to come up to Canada sometime and visit maybe and come up and do some shows up there. People would love to see you. And there's just such a huge outdoors, hunting, fishing culture. That's what being Canadian is. Once you get out of the city, right? People are just, people love to hunt, people love to fish. I go ice fishing with my friends. We go set up a... Didn't they put new restrictions on firearms up there? They just banned handguns. Absolutely, yeah. But not rifles, yeah. Which is pretty extreme from an American standpoint, certainly. I mean to think that So if you own handguns, do you have to get rid of them? No, you're not allowed to sell them to anybody and you just you're stuck with them. So it's that and that's the probably the biggest biggest change that's happened in you know, there is also no [1:10:03] automatic weapons up there. So you can't get a AR-15, for example. So AR-15s aren't automatic. Or yeah, that caliber or whatever, yeah, you can't get those weapons. But you can get a rifle, a shotgun, you know, I have a .308, I have a .243, I have a .22, I have a shotgun, you know, I have 20 gauge, 12 gauge, all the normal hunting rifles are fine. What was the thought process behind banning firearms or banning pistols? Well, I don't, I wasn't really kind of, I think it was just an attempt to curve. Is there anything people voted on? Well, they voted for the government, and the government did it. So, you know, so, you know, obviously, some people aren't too happy about it. One thing about Canada is like, the gun culture is different up there. It's more people are, I think, [1:11:02] I'm gonna get in trouble with the people that are handgun enthusiasts in Canada, but it's just not as common up there. It's more about hunting and hunting rifles. But there are probably a lot of people that are pretty upset about it for sure. But, you know, it's, you know, they're not actually taking away people's rifles or anything like that. One of the exemptions is individuals train, compete, or coach in a handgun shooting discipline that is on the program of International Olympic Committee or the International Paralympic Committee. Looks like someone's going to have to become a shooter. Yeah, I compete. I'm personally not... Compete in shooting. That's why I have to become a shooter. Yeah. Yeah, I compete. I'm personally not... Compete in shooting. That's why I have to have this gun. I'm not really like... I don't really... You know, I like my lever action rifle. I like my shotgun. I think I might hunt turkeys this year. I'd like to do that with a lot of turkeys on the property. I'm not [1:12:03] really... I don't necessarily feel like I need a handgun. It's a different kind of... I don't necessarily feel that anybody should tell me that I can't have a handgun, especially not the government. Especially not the government that's already done some really shady shit. Like what they did with the truck drivers. Right, well I'm from Ottawa too. So the trucker rally was interesting. Dude, they fucking took away their bank accounts. They seized people's, they closed people's and froze people's bank accounts that just donated money. Yeah. Is that coffee? Yes. You know what? First of all, the trucker rally was interesting because I'm from Ottawa, so I grew up, you know, the Parliament Hill, I'm sure you saw it on the news, like the Parliament buildings are basically our Congress and our Senate combined, essentially, the House of Commons and the Senate. You know, downtown Ottawa is like Washington, D.C., right? That's our Washington, D.C. I grew up there. I grew up skateboarding [1:13:02] on the Parliament buildings front steps, you know I did a radio show. This is something about the freedoms of Canada that I think is interesting. Okay when I was a kid I did a college radio show and It was midnight till two in the morning and I would say during the show. Okay after the show everybody Show up on Parliament Hill bring a soccer ball. Let's go play soccer And then we show up there with pizzas and we play soccer on the front lawn of the Canadian government till four in the morning. Every half hour the bell would go, bring, bring, the RCMP cops would come, they'd shine their lights out on the field. It was super positive, right? I love Ottawa. It's an amazing city. And I understand that everybody has the right to express their descent, right? And I think Trudeau probably did overstep with some of his reaction to that with some of the things he said specifically. But there was also this element of [1:14:08] not only was the city shut down, there's people that live downtown, so there are, you know, those horns were these air horns, there was really kind of, there's babies sleeping, it's like really like a neighborhood, right? So it's kind of funny in a way, the difference between Canadians and Americans sometimes. I'm both, right? I'm a dual citizen. I love, I love, I love... Pete Sautner Fencerider. Pete Sautner No, I just, I just love both countries, you know? I've lived here for 20 years. I, you know, I, I, but what, what, you know, what is sort of a comparable thing, I think, was, you know, in the United States, on January, was it January 6th? They did more than freeze those people's bank accounts, right? They threw them all in jail, right? So... They threw a lot of them in jail. Yeah. So, it's sort of, I'd say it's like a comparison, comparable thing. [1:15:01] It's like, I guess that's the thing I just kind of... No, that's the thing I just kind of feel as it's like, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. First of all, it's different because they entered into the Capitol building. Right, right. You're not supposed to do that. They, a lot of people broke glass, they smashed windows, they did a lot of shit. It was also, it's not comparable because it seems like they were instigated in some way, at least partially, by people in the audience that wanted them to go in there. Now, whether those people were federal agents, whether those people are Antifa, whether those people were Democratic operatives that want to turn this into chaos because it's a great way to attack Donald Trump, whatever it was, they definitely was people that were instigating people to get into the building, there's video recordings of it There's also weird instances of cops opening gates getting people in the fact that it was Severely underpoliced when they had the George Floyd protest the Black Lives Matter protests They had way more cops there for that then they did for this crazy thing where the dude is denying the election and his [1:16:05] did for this crazy thing where the dude is denying the election and his rabid fans are gonna show up and you're not prepared for this that seems the whole thing seems like if I was gonna make a playbook if I was gonna instigate a bunch of dumbasses to go do something really stupid because it will make their leader look like a fascist and Hitler that That's how I would do it. So you have that too. It's not as simple as the trucker protest was a legitimate protest where a bunch of people were like, why are you telling me that I have to take this experimental medication or I can't work? Like where is the fucking information? Where is, and now over time we've seen now that the, the studies that they did do, they don't have to release them for like 75 years. You know about all that? All the paperwork involving the vaccines? What is exact ruling of like what information they're withholding for 75 years? Let's be real clear on that. But then it's also how many people we know that got injured by it. [1:17:05] You're smart to be reluctant to do something that's new, given the history and track record of pharmaceutical drugs in this country. Especially when you have a novel new thing. The idea that this is going to be the one that's absolutely innocuous. It's not going to harm anyone. You should at the very least be able to consider not doing it, talk about not doing it. But listen man, there's no drugs like that. There's no drugs that have a gigantic effect on anything that don't have some people that have horrible adverse reactions to them. Even normal shit. Some people, people die from Tylenol all the time man. They overdose on it. People die from all kinds of medication it turns out they have an allergy to it's like Weird shit happens with people when you start if and people are right to be reluctant Yeah, but you might be right and you might be wrong But you're right to express that you don't think the government should be able to tell you what you can and can't do [1:18:03] specific specifically about putting something into your body or you can't work. That's crazy So that's that protest. It's a different protest. Yeah, for sure. The whole vibe behind is different. Absolutely It is a different subject for sure. It's in response to tyranny Foy request the FDA had previously said that it takes approximately eight minutes per page to process records for the FOIA request and that it could only review and release 500 pages a month, which is 6,000 pages a year. At that rate, it would take 75 years to release all the data. That's crazy! Yeah. That's so crazy. I guess the point I'm trying to make, is outside of the weeds of it is when I'm hanging out in Canada, half the people I talk to are so excited for me to come down here and they're all like, you know, they were supportive of the truckers, right? Like this was not like this was not some fringe thing in Canada. [1:19:03] Maybe the people that actually got in their truck and drove there and camped out there. Maybe that was a little bit more of a dedicated protester than the average citizen. But it's just like here. You have people, fuck Joe Biden. Fuck Trudeau, they got chanting there at the UFC. You know what you would probably be amazed to see? I don't know if this is so common in Canada that we just don't even really, I don't even think to mention it. Driving around everywhere in the country, in the city, everywhere, people pick up trucks, fuck Trudeau flags. It says fuck Trudeau, black flag, white letters, Canada flag on it, people are mad. And so it's not just like everybody in Canada is just down with it. Now, enough people are down with it that he got elected, but he may not get elected the next [1:20:01] time and then that'll be just like it is down here. I hope he doesn't. Might just be like it is down here. If he gets elected again, you guys are glutton for punishment. Yeah, it could be. It could be the same as here. Biden could get elected again. Trump could get elected. It's sort of like, this is, I was thinking the other day, I'm almost kind of wondering, this is obviously a stupid idea, but be better if we just got rid of the elections and just let the conservatives run it for four years and then just automatically the liberals run it four years. I can pick a million holes in why that wouldn't work, but and just let it go back and forth and then people can just be like, okay, let's just all get along, let them have four years at running the country, do what they do, let the other side run for four years. It's kind of a pendulum that goes back and forth anyways. And then we can kind of get back to, you know, just all getting along and... Well, even if that did happen, the same problem would take place. And it's that the people that are embedded, that are running the government, the real people behind the curtain, they're always there. They don't get elected. [1:21:00] They're always there. And those are the people that are actually running the government Which so it would be the same horseshit that we're dealing with now Every four years some new spokesperson comes in play and they do a bunch of shit that pisses off half the country and At the same thing behind the scenes the same people are running things Yeah, it's so frustrating and I got to the point where I started to kind of Just try to disconnect from the conversation, which sounds, sometimes I feel bad about it because you wanna have, you wanna have a social contribution to, awareness, you wanna be discussing. But then you go, man, I just don't feel like talking about the same thing over and over and over and over and over and over again. It's like, yeah. What I was gonna say though is that you know like The whole system is set up so that one person can't be in control for too long That's the whole idea about term limits. You got four years and then you get elected again [1:22:01] You get another four years and then you're fucking done. Mm-hmm. I Don't And then you get elected again, you get another four years, and then you're fucking done. I don't... I'm just saying this. This is not something that I fully support, but there's something to be said for someone staying in there for a long time and getting it right if they're good at it. Right? I mean, if I was... The backfire is over. In any other job, we would backfire with power and and control the problem is we are terrified of having someone like Putin Yeah, who's in control Russia for decades, right? Sure But if you had someone who was good at the job you would want them to stay on the job I give you had the best CEO of your company you're making record money and everything's doing great and the products are incredible Yeah, you want to keep that guy's the CEO. He's obviously killing it. When Steve Jobs was running Apple, he's killing it. You don't want to remove him as the CEO. Because you know how long it takes to build anything, right? Right. And how long it takes to get good at your job. Right. And to figure out who are the right people, who's backstabby, who's fucking, who's, you know, what are the issues, who's trying to climb the political ladder and they're just Thinking about themselves only their sociopaths figure it out. It takes a long time to fucking work your cabinet now [1:23:09] We're gonna if you had a president that was a young president that gets in at like 38 40 years old I and 20 years of running the country correctly. That's what most of these dictatorships have yeah, that's a benefit Yeah, it's horrible for the people But at the benefit of having one guy run things Just keep it locked up and this is the right way to do it been doing it this way forever. This is correct Yeah, it's interesting that yeah, you got a couple the most important job ever in a new guy gets it or a new woman Right ever yet, but someday every four years. Yeah. That's crazy. And often trying to undo everything that was done the four years before. Yeah, well, so that's what term limits brought in. But then on the flip side, you know, we don't have term limits in Canada and Trudeau's going to be there for, you know, if you're not a fan of Trudeau, you go, oh, I wish we had term You know cuz cuz he's been there over to over eight years now, right? So and right but that's cuz he's getting elected out. He might be getting voted out [1:24:08] It seems like the Canadians are leaning towards getting rid of him. Is that correct? You know, it's one of those things where it's it's it's it's kind of feels like it's almost like 5050 ultimately, but who knows I think it definitely feels like it could happen Who doesn't want to get rid of them? Who are those people? A lot of it's regional. I guess it's, you know what, I kind of, if we, I knew if we were going to talk about this, I wanted to kind of sort of make this point, because I, again, I want Americans to understand what Canada is. It's exactly like here. It's the same people that, the same type of people that like Biden or the people that like Trudeau. Like the people in Canada that vote for Trudeau are the exact same people that they like Biden too. There's nobody in Canada that likes Trudeau, that also likes Trump. There's also nobody in Canada that likes Pierre Polyev, that likes Biden. It's exactly the same. [1:25:01] It's the same division. It's even on social media, it's the same. Like you go on social media, you go on TikTok, you got angry conservatives in Canada saying fuck Trudeau and, you know, we're turning into a communist country and all of this stuff, like completely, completely the exact same thing as here. So it's just, it's just, if I was, I'm not here here to try to be a spokesperson for Canada or anything, but they would not want that. Well, I think that's what scares us the most about Canada is that Canada is so similar to the United States, but we're seeing your rights erode. There's also weird bills that keep getting passed, the C-16 bill, the mandatory pronouns, mandatory use of someone's pronouns. And then there was the fact that you guys don't really have freedom of speech. You have hate laws. You have hate speech laws. And then you also have some weird shit going on with Canada trying to regulate the internet. [1:26:01] And with the government trying to regulate podcasts and make podcasts subject to their... They did try. I did a little research on this in case it came up. They tried and they haven't put into effect that regulation of the Internet of as far as regulating disinformation. That has not been put in effect. And Trudeau actually said he would not put that into effect. It was a, you know, sort of a subset of, you know, it's sort of like, you know, you've got your extreme left wing here, and then you have cooler heads, and they did not actually put that into effect. Is it still on the table? Trudeau has said that he would never put that into effect. Is it still on the table? Trudeau has said that he would never put that into effect. Well, I think he's saying that now because he knows it's fucked. And so the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms, OK, that's kind of like our Constitution, I guess. They say we have freedom expression, freedom of the press, freedom of assembly. So we do have. [1:27:01] But just the fact that you have elements of your government that would even consider that. Yeah, but it's like it's like it's like here. It is. And that's the same exact same thing. Like if you don't agree with it, then it's the same thing as, you know, fuck Joe Biden. You know, it's the same thing. Fuck Trudeau. So and so, you know, because it's interesting, like I just really want, you know, Americans who are, been to Canada to understand that. Are you working for the Canadian Ministry of... I would consider it. Tourism and travel. You know what I was thinking about? In Canada, you don't have to be born in Canada to run for prime minister. You could run for prime minister of Canada and come up and solve all this stuff. I mean, you have to live up there, but it's a nice place. You could come on up to Canada. You would win, too. That's the thing that would be amazing. You would win and you could just... Imagine if I became prime minister of Canada. Can you imagine? I was just thinking... [1:28:01] You think it's crazy if Donald Trump being president of the United States That would be next craziest thing that would be the next craziest thing more crazy I'm almost more crazy because at least he was like hinting about running for president forever. Yeah, have I just on a whim? Just decided to go run for the Prime Minister of Canada and win because you would you would win because you have so many Fans up there. You really do and that's that's why I want that that's so scary That is so unqualified to run a country. Well, I mean, you've got a lot of You know valid concerns and you feel strongly about things. I think you should run I would support you I Think that would be amazing Want to roll up to the world economic forum high on mushrooms Amazing. I want to roll up to the World Economic Forum high on mushrooms. See in Canada by the way, mushrooms are basically legal in Canada now. Here's a sum, the Trudeau, again, he did legalized weed, that is one thing that he did do. So congratulations, you did one good thing. It's just he's a weasel, that's the problem. [1:29:01] He's what I don't like in leaders, this fake bullshit fucking nonsensical gaslighting. I just, that shit drives me nuts. It's so creepy. And then using all the inclusive terms to make it seem like everybody else is a piece of shit. And you're an amazing human being and you're on the right side of progressive movement. And like, it's all just a bullshit act to stay in power. Yeah. And when you see politicians do it, you know, they just fucking wet their finger and try to figure out which way the wind's blowing and say those things and then act in the interest of whatever money got them into that position in the first place. Yeah. Whatever machine is behind them, whatever support they get. That's, that's all they're doing. And those types of politicians, that's not the only kind you can have, you know? It's kind of like, yeah, it's... You can have real leaders. They do exist. It's such a huge sort of thing to wrap your head around. It's capitalism, it's money, [1:30:01] it controls everything. I mean, I kind of feel just leaving Hollywood, right? Kind of has sort of reset a little bit of my \u2013 you know, like, you know, this more than anybody else, of course, but because we even talked about this whatever it was, 20 years ago on my podcast about how you can democratize media with podcasting and get rid of all this money controlling everything, controlling. And so it's sort of a, you know, a micro, micro sort of, or it's a similar thing to just politics in general, you know, money comes in controls, everything can be so frustrating, especially now when you can see that, you know, you don't necessarily have to play that game anymore. So yeah. Well, it's also the hive mind of Hollywood you're leaving. There's a thing that happens in that town, in that area, where the people that think outside of the norm say it in like whispered hush tones. [1:31:04] There's a certain ideology that's attached to that city and it's not logical. It's a kooky, wacky, completely insulated left-wing view of the world and they enforce it with an iron fist. And if you're not on that team, you don't get booked for things. You don't get picked for things. If you're someone who has conservative leanings or you talk about, because there's projects you're never going to get. You're never going to be involved with. The people will, they'll malign you and without knowing you at all, be openly prejudiced about you. And so no one does it. So everyone who goes over there who's just like desperately trying to make it They're desperately trying to get in movies. They're desperately trying to get a recording deal Whatever it is. They're desperately trying to do the last thing they want to do is Do something and talk about something that's gonna politically get them at odds with the people that run the studios [1:32:04] politically get them at odds with the people that run the studios. So no one does. Everybody just follows the same sort of wacky ideology these people take from the universities. They go straight into working as a PA and straight into working for executives and producers and all of those people are indoctrinated. They're all in this wild ass cult of weirdness and then you have people that move there to try to make it and these people are just always going on auditions. They're always like, please choose me, please choose me. And no, they didn't choose me. And so you're trying to be friends with the people who choose people. You're trying to get them into parties, trying to introduce them to other people. You're trying to be around other famous people. Getting anxiety just talking about. So this person's been chosen. I gotta be around the chosen person. We go to the chosen person's party Maybe we can get chosen and they so that you get this like Overwhelming anxiety that fills the fucking city Yeah, and then now you have tick-tockers and influencers and all these people that are just trying to do anything to get famous Yeah, and that the reality stars and all that started it all off and the fucking real house wise and all that wacky shit [1:33:10] You get away from that. You're like, oh, there's real people out there. There's real people. That's a storm of anxiety Just a hurricane of confusion Zoloft and fucking And everyone's losing their mind and everyone's in therapy and everyone's fucking nuts and everyone's trans it's out of Touch. Yeah, it's just a crazed cult. Yeah, it's like, you start out as a standup comedian and you are trying to poke holes in the absurdity of the world and you're saying things that are not being said on stage. And then as you all of a sudden get brought into, and I'm sort of saying the, the, every stand-up comedian, every outlier, every person that's a doing something different, a punk rocker, a skateboarder, you know, my goofy show was [1:34:00] so out, out there when I was making it, and I was making it, I was rebelling against, you know, in Canada, in my little, little public access show. I was kind of trying to rebel against what obviously seems like a formulaic, mainstream way of thinking to create art, right? And then you move to Los Angeles, because, well, the show got on MTV, I ended up moving to Los Angeles. Now you're, I'm talking about myself now. You're in the trance. All of a sudden being asked to go on, you know, the show, the Tonight Show, Saturday in the Life, and you're on these shows. And you know, I was sort of a bit of a naive, you know, moron basically, you know, like purposefully so. I would go on these shows and try to go nuts, right, and try to do something crazy and just try to sort of almost disrupt the whole format of it, right, in those first couple of years as a naive person who didn't understand how Hollywood worked. And I was just, you know, I went on, I had a similar thing to our last appearance here [1:35:00] on Jay Leno. I went on Jay Leno when I had a film coming out. I went Jay Leno and I came up with this bit. Let me roll the bar. Remember they had the bar cart, the J bar. I'll roll it out on stage during the show and then I'll do a shot of Jagger with Jay. You know, Jay doesn't \u2013 this is a crazy story. I probably told you this before, but I do a shot of Jagger with Jay and Jay doesn't drink. So he said, okay, well, throw it over my shoulder, right? So we go there and I'm with my buddy who's, you know, he has a buddy who like pushes you further into the darkness, right? Like, you know, like, you know, you got a bad idea and he pushes you further and makes it even worse. You lose the force. Yeah, so we're in the green room getting ready, I'm in the green room with my buddy getting ready to go on the show and he goes, do a shot now before you go on. I'm like, okay, so I do a shot now before I go on. Get ready to go on. The bit's all approved with the Tonight Show. It's a gag. They know I'm doing real jagger, right? But it wasn't planned that I would do a shot before I go on. Two shots. Two shots. Do another one. So now I walk out, I'm three shots in before even, show even starts. Oh boy, you're hammered. Well, then, yeah, and then I got [1:36:10] out there and I did a shot and the audience goes, crazy and cheers, right? And so then I do another shot and so I end up doing way too many shots and it kind of ended up very similarly to our last conversation here. And it was actually pretty hilarious. It was one of those things where it did get out of control. The next day, the New York Post had my picture and it said, dead drunk. It was just like one of those things. And Jay called me at home the next day, you okay, man? You really kind of went up. But then, you know, that was sort of the beginning of me realizing, oh, you know, you can't. Why Tom Green went on Leno and deliberately got drunk. Yeah. And, you know, in hindsight, I go, well, that was, you know, kind of the outrageous kind of young version of me [1:37:02] that I was doing on the show that made perfect sense to do that for a gag. But then, you know, the naive kid in me didn't understand, well, you know, a lot of people in Hollywood did not understand that and then got mad. And the movie studio- You got mad at you? Well, like the movie studio, I was on promoting a movie and they were like, oh, we don't want you to go any more talk shows for the movie. I'm like, what? I was a joke. I was obviously, it was a joke. And they're not interpreting it as a joke. They're interpreting it as me being kind of out of control. Which, yeah, exactly. But it was a manufactured out of control. I was out of control, but it was planned. It was planned confusion, right? So, but that kind of subtlety didn't really, didn't really kind of pass the smell test. So, so then you start to go, oh geez, I better tone it down a little bit. You know, better be better tone it down a little bit because this and you sort of end up falling into that feeling where all of a sudden you're, like you said, going to an audition or driving out to a meeting and trying to sell some of it. [1:38:05] Or just being a person that you're not. Yeah, exactly. Like if you're hosting a late night talk show and all of a sudden you're this sort of wearing a tie, this odd button down. Trying to make something that they like and fit into their mold and, you know, try to get your own little creative shots off within that mold, but no longer are you actually being purely yourself, right? Right. And you can't. It's not even possible. And so, you know, you end up living there for 20 years, end up living there for 20 years, and it becomes normal pretty quickly, right? And then you sort of slowly forget, oh, you know, oh, this is just the way it works, I guess now. And then eventually, you know, one day you go, I'm getting out of here. And I got to say, you know, when you moved here, it was a bit of a light bulb, I think, [1:39:00] for me too. It was inspiring for me because I sort of realized, oh, look at that. Joe's leaving. You know, because you were always at the comedy store, all the clubs, it was a scene in LA and you're thinking, wow, like Joe's just going to go do it on his own and just turn his back on this whole infrastructure here. And I was like, yeah, you can do that. You don't have to be here. And it was really inspiring. And it inspired a lot of people. And I can tell you, again, it's now living in the woods, not far from where I grew up. We had a cottage when I was a kid, pretty close to where I grew up. They've got these birds there called whipper-wills. Wh? Whipper-will, whipper-will. They make this sound. They're a really unique sounding bird, right? Hank Williams sings about them. And I grew up as a kid hearing those in the woods at night, you know? Just at dusk, you hear them. And now, like, when I I'm going to bed I hear those and I'm like, oh, I feel like the sounds of my childhood [1:40:07] are enriched. And the smells of my childhood and even the things with the mosquitoes, the horse flies. And you're like, even the large mouth bass in the lake and the red wing blackbirds and all those sounds and smells and everything. And you feel like yourself again. And it's like, and there was, you know, for 20 years, I'd be like driving up Laurel Canyon looking at palm trees and for 20 years, even after 20 years living in the same house, I never felt like I was actually at home. I felt like I was off on some business trip trying to, and I remember saying, even just even after living there 15, 20 years, like, what the hell am I doing at Los Angeles? This is crazy. What, what, this is a weird place. You know, it's like a weird place. And you know, you feel almost like you have to be there. Now everything's changed, the internet. I think, and I think COVID did that for a lot of people too, [1:41:06] because all of a sudden everybody's locked in their house and you're dealing with people and these Zoom calls and the internet's changed. You don't have to be anywhere anymore. We realize we can be wherever we want. You know, you took your entire organization away and it's bigger than ever and light bulbs start going off and you're like, wow, you know what, that's really cool. I'm going to go home. Well, when we were living in LA, you're always thinking of yourself as someone who wants to work with the system. You're always thinking of that always. I mean I was on Television shows and did all that stuff did a couple of movies. You're always working with the system Yep, so no matter what you do you're working even when you put out specials You're putting out specials you're meeting with these people you meet you're working with the system And you start to think that that's what you do. That's the business that you're but it's not what you do is what you do [1:42:05] That's what you do what you do is what you do and you could do what you do Wherever you want to do it Yeah, especially once you get good enough out of they have an audience and like you're supposed to take a chance You're not supposed to like keep living your life by these like bizarre tyrants and their rules and regulations about the way and the way they behave and the way they fucking the about the way and the way they behave and the way they fucking the It's so ridiculous. It's such a bizarre place to be and When you realize that you don't need that anymore and comedians today realize they don't need that anymore all they need is a tiktok account or a YouTube account an Instagram account a Twitter account and some good content and If you get on podcast, people will check you out. They'll try you out. And there's a gigantic organic network of comedians. We're all friends with each other and we all get on each other's podcast and we all trust each other. Like, if I tell you this guy's really funny, go see him. Like, I'm telling you the truth. I'm not, [1:43:00] I would not ever lie. And I wouldn't have them on if I didn't think they're funny if I didn't like them They didn't weren't nice people. I'm not interested. Yeah, so there's this beautiful organic thing and That's the real network now. That's the real network. It's an organic network. It's there's no contract So every comic that I know that has contracts with other comics. They start doing things together. It always goes south I mean, maybe it can not go south once or twice. I mean, maybe there's some great people that have figured out, I mean, Tom Sigourz seems like he's figured out how to do it with your mom's house, but that's like almost it. Everybody else that I know that gets involved with deals and so like just fucking, just help each other. Just help each other organically. That was what I really loved about hanging at the mothership the last two nights is the energy there is different. Like for the comedy club just in the green room. Like I mean you felt it. You can tell that you've created an energy there that is supportive, right? [1:44:01] All the comics are just hanging out in the green room smoking cigarettes and everyone's talking and just, you know, it's super chill. And I, you know, I did, you know, sometimes find that, you know, it wasn't always like that, you know, when you're in a comedy club, you know, and other comedians are sometimes a little more feel a little more competitive with each other. And there's a little bit of that. So stupid. It's so stupid. The, any competition that you have with other comedians is inspiration. That's all you should look at it. If someone's doing really well and you're like, wow, I wish I was doing that well. Great. That's inspiration to work harder. That's inspiration to go write more, do more sets, reevaluate your material, go over it better, do something, write more, have some life experiences that you could translate and then interact. Like, work harder. It's like you should just be inspired. And if that person is a good person, you should be happy for them. And that's what we can all do. This idea that we're all in competition with each other is just stupid. It's not good for anybody. I was stoked to get to see your work in progress, your new hour that you're working on, that [1:45:05] was incredible. Thank you. Yeah, that was really fun. You got such a great place to watch the show there. I mean, first of all, Fat Man Room, Fat Man, Little Boy, awesome. I mean, I just love the way you've set up for the comics where you can go and sit on that balcony up there and just watch the show. The balcony is very nice. It was just really amazing to watch you working out your new shit. Thank you. It's fucking awesome. And I enjoyed our conversation because I've watched a lot of your interviews with comedians here. I saw your interview with Louis and you were talking about writing and saw your interview with Bill Burr. You're talking about writing and there's this thing where a lot of comics don't write and we were talking about this a little bit the other day but I love the process of hearing how the process works for you because I kind of do a mixture of things too. I like to go set a computer and type stuff up. But I've always found it hard to like, this is a question I kind of have for you because when you go right, [1:46:06] you work it out on stage and you know, you got your idea, you got your premise, you got your punch lines, you got your bit and you're working it out on stage. And then I found it really inspiring actually because first of all, I love the way it works with Stand Up. Like when you showed up at the green room, you're about to go on stage and you're like focused, you know? You're like focused and you're going through your notes and you're focused and I'm like, you know, I can tell you're focused, right? Then you go out, you kill it, you come back in and you see the, you know, that adrenaline rush. And then we're just just you know, and then where everyone's just you're just relaxed And it's just that that release right yeah, and then we were just talking about writing. You said you're gonna go home and actually Yeah, I don't know if you want people to know this is too far into the behind the curtain or whatever No, it's okay. I'm gonna go home and right after I just think that's so cool You know well, it's fresh you go home and actually type type up some stuff and write it back. That's when I've been doing some of my best writing. It's like a two hour window that I have [1:47:05] where I'm still jazzed from being on stage. Right, right, right. And you're still kind of thinking in that mindset. You gotta just kind of, and don't let yourself relax too much. Like kind of stay in that mindset. Right. And then, you know, as long as I'm not up too late where I get tired, then I'm forcing it. So, but if I can get home at a reasonable time and I've got a lot of energy, I get my best writing in. I get some of my best ideas. Because I'm already thinking like comedy. Yeah. You just had it. You said it. You have the exact words, rhythm in your head. And that, I thought, was a bit of a light bulb for me. That's inspiring, because I often find it's like, you know, when you write something down or when you do the set and you maybe write it down after and then you don't go get to writing it and then you never remember what the rhythm was later. What the hell was it I said again? I know it was way funnier than what I'm writing right now. [1:48:01] Right. So that's... That's why recordings are so important. Just put your phone on the little voice recording thing, just to get a reference. Yeah. I was talking to Louis C.K. had a conversation with him about this and it was pretty interesting because I've kind of... I like to drink, but I kind of quit. I really have cut back drinking in the last... I quit drinking like three days ago. No, but stand up, you know. I wasn't doing stand up when I was doing my TV show. I'd done it when I was a kid. I stopped, I did my TV show, started again like, 13, 14 years ago. Was drinking a lot like I like to drink, like everybody likes to drink. And I go on the road and I started realizing, man, like even if I go drink in Friday night after the show, my Saturday night shows aren't as good as they could have been because I'm [1:49:00] kind of like carrying a little bit of this alcohol around in me from the night before. I quickly realized, you know, the beginning was I go have a beer on stage, right? Then I go, oh, I better not have a beer on stage. I'll wait till after the show to have a drink. So then after the show Friday night, you know, on the road it's fun, you know, you're in Cleveland, let's go, let's party. And of course I was, you know, younger too, right? I was, you know, my thirties. So you can handle it a little more too than when you're 52. So but then every year that went by I was like, oh, those Saturday night shows are getting a little harder to get through, you know? And it's just one too many Saturdays just lying in my hotel room just waiting for the show to start hungover going, oh my god, and then gun and then dreading and being on stage. So then I decided I was going to quit drinking when I'm doing stand-up. So I'm not drinking this weekend until maybe Sunday night. I mean, I'll have a drink Sunday night. Maybe even Saturday night I could do a hungover show Sunday. [1:50:00] But I've got to have a little fun. Listen, I've got a solution for you. IV drips. Yeah. Oh, it's a game changer. So I can keep drinking? You bring that right on stage with you? No. I'm just kidding, you don't bring the IV on stage. The next day, silly goose. The next day, get a high dose vitamin IV. Well, the thing that I've been enjoying about kind of scheduling it where it's like I don't drink for a couple of days before, you know, a week, a weekend like this from doing five shows is like I find and this is what I was talking about with Louie about where I had a You know, we're not close friends, but I had an opportunity to have a conversation with him about this once and it was pretty cool because the way his mind thinks is so, you know analytical about this type of specific, everything comedy, right? And I was telling him, I was saying, you know, I stopped drinking before I go on stage because, you know, I feel like there was this period where I didn't have a drink for a couple weeks and when I was doing crowd work, I was just coming up with stuff that I would never, you know, when you have a great set of crowd work and you get up and see how it came up with this intricate story that I told. And it was clear my mind was operating in a different level than it would have been [1:51:09] had I just had a few beers the night before even, right? And then he said something that had never really even occurred to me before, which is, you know, when you're working on a set, you know, if you have like a little bit of booze in your system even from the night before and you're up there working on a set, you don't remember the stuff that happened on stage as well either. So then when you go home, you don't believe and recall, you know, and that's the biggest, you know, the big part of repetition, getting them to do these sets over and over again and you remember everything and build on it and build on it. If you're not retaining that information, right, so I'm really laying off the sauce. And I was actually kind of, I was excited to hear that we were going to do this show on the day of my, I'm doing two shows tonight at the Mothership, My Fat Man. And I was kind of excited because I knew I wasn't going to drink on this show. So, you knew you weren't going to repeat? Yeah, I knew I was not, I was going, I'm not going to do what I did last time and so I kind of came not trying to encourage you to drink [1:52:05] Yeah, I'm trying to encourage you that if you do wind up drinking too much Do you feel hungover you don't have to just tolerate that I like that too. Yeah get get an IV drip IV drip Yeah, if you're in town, I'll connect you to the lady that does that just seems like such an extreme It's like you know, you're drinking too much when you're in a hospital bed with an IV drip. You know you're being smart about your partying. Yeah. Yeah. Or you're not in a hospital bed. Yeah. You're just sitting down. It takes 20 minutes. The reason I told you about the reason why I wanted to come down here sooner and just kind of come check out and hang at the club, you know. I was super stoked I'm actually getting to headline the club this weekend. That was even more than I was expecting. I just wanted to come down to see you and congratulate you on the club. And the reason it's taken me so long is I had a fucked up thing that happened after I moved to the farm. Basically immediately after I moved to the farm and everything was going great. I had a major injury that I told you about. [1:53:07] I didn't get into too much detail about it, but I had a major injury in Costa Rica. I went down there for a vacation and there was this, you know, a big bonfire on the beach and everyone was having fun. I went to bed in the hotel. I wake up, I decide to go back to the bonfire a few hours later. It's like two in the morning at this point. The fire has gotten a lot smaller. I pick a piece of driftwood off this beach in this remote beach. I go up to throw the driftwood on the fire. And the reason the fire had gotten smaller is the people that had been at the fire put out the fire by burying it in sand and they buried this huge bonfire that was about the size of this room in sand and so now there was just a little fire with sand covering hot coals about four feet leading up to it and I'm walking up to the thing you know barefoot right in in in you [1:54:00] know in in a you know in bathing suit and the t-shirt with a piece of driftwood and my foot goes into the sand, into these hot coals, immediate realization. I fall back, if I'd fallen forward, I mean my face would be burnt, I ended up immediately realizing what had happened. Third degree burns on both feet, the top and bottom of my right foot and strangely the top of my left foot, not the bottom, thankfully. And the nerves were completely burned off my feet, so after the initial shock of it, I wasn't in pain, which was the weirdest thing, And I looked down and there's a couple people came to my sort of assistance and we're putting water on it, not feeling anything. You know, I'll get graphic because it's crazy, but the skin is just falling off my feet. Oh my God. I get help back to my room. I'm not wanting this to be, you know, it's the first day I got there. I'm [1:55:07] like, this really ruined my vacation, you know. I'm not feeling pain because the burns, the nerves are gone, so I'm literally like trying to clean it up with like some nail clippers, chopping a little bit of burnt flesh off. Do you have photos? I do, yeah. Of this? Yeah. Like when it looked like that? Not online. So. No, on your phone phone I have not even I need to say I need to say I haven't even talked about it online I didn't this first I've talked about it online yeah I never knew that you were I didn't I didn't want to talk about it I just didn't I it was crazy I ended up spending two weeks in the hospital in Costa Rica and then was medivacked on an air ambulance with Charlie. Whoa. Charlie, you were there for the whole ride? Yeah, with Charlie, yeah. The nurses take Charlie to go potty? So I had some friends who came down who were coming down anyways and they took Charlie. [1:56:05] Oh, Charlie. They looked after Charlie for two weeks while I, so I got driven to the San Jose Hospital. Hi, Charlie. What's up? Yeah, and she was, she was worried. She's adorable, man. Yeah. She's such a sweet dog. Yeah. I know the people that are seeing her out now, like, oh, she's kind of freaked out, but normally she's not freaked out at all. She's super sweet. She runs up to everybody and wagging her tail. Yeah. Super friendly. It's last. Yeah. So as I got to this hospital, there's a surgeon from Columbia who worked there. It's a great hospital, thankfully. Came out, he said, looked at my foot, said, we're taking you in immediately into surgery. And they did skin grafts off my leg and they took skin grafts like the size of a football off my right leg and stapled 60 staples to staple the skin into my foot. And then I come up out of surgery and the [1:57:04] doctor says to me, which I think he was trying to make me feel better But he said Well the good news is you'll probably be able to live a normal life She says to me is the first thing he says to me and I'm you know, I can't move I had morphine going into my back Couldn't feel anything below my waist. I thought it was paralyzed They told me I would be you wouldn't be able to feel anything not below my waist while this thought it was paralyzed. They told me I wouldn't be able to feel anything below my waist while I came out of it. And then I'd spend two weeks in a hospital bed and I was not able to get out of the hospital bed for two weeks. This is debatably too much information, but it's interesting. You get very constipated from all the medicine that's going into you and you end up not being able to you know go to the bathroom for about a week but then you ultimately have to go and you can't get out of bed because your foot has to remain elevated. Oh boy. So this is where you've got to drop a log in a bucket. You've got to drop a log in a diaper. Oh Jesus. [1:58:01] Someone's got to clean your butts. And then these Costa Rican nurses come in and clean your butt. Oh, Lord. And it was just a really interesting moment of clarity for me where you realize you're humbled as a human being and you realize, oh, this is, I've lost all ability to look after myself and you just kind of end up having to just kind of go with it. And it was, you know, to my honest with, I still think about that sometimes. It wasn't the worst thing in the world, not just kidding. But, you know, the, the, the, they were very nice. The nurses were very nice. Very sweet of them to take care of you like that. So you can't put any weight on your foot because the bottom of your foot is that skin graft as well or just the top? For the, so then for the next, exactly. And it was very delicate, the skin graft for the first. No, was the bottom skin grafted as well? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Really? It's all around very, very. The bottom of your foot, like the sole of your foot was skin grafted. That's crazy, because I would think like, how do they skin graft that? Right? Does your footprint footprint come back in the same way as the ridges, the dermal ridges and everything? Yeah, but it's not perfect though. It's interesting the \u2013 it was a World War II doctor who [1:59:10] invented the way of taking these skin grafts, actually. They did it for burn victims in the war and they invented some really \u2013 I don't know the word for it, but some tool that actually takes a micro thin layer of skin. So micro \u2013 I don't really have a scar on my leg anymore. It's amazing. So it's almost like less than paper thin layers of skin. They take them off of strips like this and then they staple it into your foot to hold it on there. And then that's left on there for about, I think it was just about two weeks, actually. And then at the end of the two weeks in Costa Rica, I had to go under three general anesthetic surgeries in Costa Rica, in a Central American hospital. By myself, by the way. My mom wanted to fly down. My dad wanted to fly down. I was like, [2:00:01] you know what? I'm just sitting here, like, you know, half out of it, you know, so I just spent two weeks in there and there was a second surgery where they go in and they checked it, they had to go in and check it and so I had to go under general just to like take the bandages off, because it's painful. And then the third general one was to go in and take the staples out. And then medev one was to go in and take the staples out. And then medevac back to Toronto to Sunnybrook burn center, Sunnybrook hospital burn center where I spent another 10 days. And then for the next essentially six months, Joe, I would have to go to doctor three times a week to have my bandages changed because it's like, you know, losing. For six months? Yeah. Yeah. It was about three times a week for the first two months and then it was like twice a week and then it was once a week and they're also monitoring it for infection, right? Because if you get an infection, then they have to amputate your foot. So it was basically six months of me just worried about losing my foot. You know, you said, am I going to have like one testicle and one foot? [2:01:05] Is this what's going on with me? So they didn't have to amputate my foot, fortunately, but it was pretty scary shit. Holy shit, dude. And anyways, and then it was kind of like limping for the next year and then now I'm kind of still a little wobbly, but it's pretty good. I'm just gonna, I actually found some photos of this and pulled them up because I thought you might ask when I told you about this. Of course. Now the thing about this is what's crazy is this is like, this is actually, this is like actually when it had healed. So I mean, that's after it healed. This is months, months, this is maybe two months after I was back in Canada at this point. I have some better ones there. You know, here's, That's horrible. [2:02:03] This is sort of healing up, healing up this. That's my mom, my mom had at the healing up at the hospital, but Yeah, it's a damn son. You got fucked up. Yeah. Yeah, but It's you know, could have been worse could have been worse. So yeah You're alive you're here. It's been worse and you get this you get the sense of almost get this, you get this sense of almost like a sense of gratitude you get afterwards because you're like, I'm alive, I'm here, I still got my foot. And it's so strange how that happens because it's happened to me twice now in my life because I had testicular cancer when I was on MTV and that's why I stopped the show and I'd go to the hospital, they took my right testicle, I still got the left one, everything's fine. But \u2013 and you go from \u2013 there's this moment where you're like \u2013 in both occasions, this moment where you're sort of traumatized by what's happening and angry about it. [2:03:00] And then it sort of almost instantly flips. It must be some sort of human self-preservation kind of thing that's built into where minds work. Where you're now grateful that it's not worse, you know, like, you know, oh, it's healing. I still have my foot. This is a learning experience, you know. I'm not going to do that again. You think that's wired into people? I think the opposite. I think that's a learning experience. You know, I'm not, I'm not going to do that again. You think that's wired into people? I think the opposite. I think that's a learned skill. I think that's something that you recognize as an intelligent person. Like, you know what? I should be thankful for what I have all the time. And we all should. It's really hard to be. You get so accustomed to the way your life is that you can't imagine if you were severely impaired or something horrible happened. It's like after I had cancer, it sometimes it comes into my mind like a little bit of a light bulb or a wave. Like I'll think to myself, you know, if I'm having a slightly [2:04:00] bad day, you know what I mean? And I'll be like, I don't, for whatever reason, have it's just sometimes when I'm out doing normal errands and I'm having a slightly bad day, you know what I mean? And I'll be like, I don't know for whatever reason, happens to sometimes when I'm out doing normal errands and I'm having a slightly bad day. I go to the gas station, pump and gas or something. And then I think to myself, oh man, at least I'm not in the hospital right now dealing with some crazy existential life and death thing. And so yeah, maybe it is a learned thing because of what I've been through with that because the same thing happened after I burned my foot. You know, as soon as it's sort of, as soon as you're quickly started, you go from, I can't believe this has happened, I'm angry, I just ruined my vacation, I might lose my foot, this is horrible too. Okay, how are we going to get better? How are we going to make sure that I do everything to change the bandages on time? And your whole life changes, right? You know, I'm not thinking about all the things that I'm normally stressed about, whether it's work or relationships or whatever, things that are just normal, standard things that you're pissed off about. And all of a sudden you're just \u2013 oh, not even thinking about that anymore. I'm just thinking about making sure I don't get an infection on my foot and you're sort of treating it like a military operation, trying [2:05:07] to save your foot or trying to, you know, make sure that you, you know, make the right choices in your cancer treatment. And then when you come out of it, it's true, it's possibly a learned thing. You come out of it and you realize, oh, all that shit that I'm normally worried about doesn't matter compared to what I just went through. And then you can kind of maybe learn from that. And then at time passes, you slip back into the same routine. You start stressing out about the same things again, but then every once in a while it pops into your head and go, at least I'm not dealing with the foot's healed and I'm outside right now and everything's good. I'm walking, I'm talking, I'm not dealing with the foot's healed and I'm outside right now and everything's good. I'm walking, I'm talking, I'm alive. So gratitude. Gratitude. It's also people need to experience a certain amount of discomfort in order to appreciate not having that. It's just the way we're wired for whatever reason. [2:06:00] I choose voluntary discomfort. I do shit like cold plunges and so on as and hard workouts. And I think it's a viable strategy I think it really works. I think if you can force yourself to do difficult things like a difficult workout a difficult yoga class Cold plunges saunas that kind of shit Your regular life will be less stressful. Yeah, you'll be you'll be able to deal with these We're seemingly high stress situations, they will seem less stressful because you're doing voluntary stress all the time. And you prepare yourself for difficult things. When you don't prepare yourself for difficult things, you can get caught up in like just traffic being something that blows your mind, you can't handle anymore. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. I see you doing those cold plunges, and I haven't done that yet, but people do that in lakes and stuff Yeah, awesome. I want to do that get a sauna put it right by your leg Yeah, I want to do that. I want to get a little cold as fucking the winter Yeah, I was playing hockey on it a few weeks ago Yeah, just out there shooting some pucks in the net and and you know so I can play can skate again I did the first year I didn't skate. Get yourself one of them little wood powered saunas. Yeah. You can use it with firewood. [2:07:07] Yeah. You don't have to have anything electricity rigged up out there. Yeah. Yeah. They make a bunch of those. Yeah. You can get some wood in there. Get that bitch hot as fuck. Get a chainsaw. Cut a hole in the ice. Yeah. I've been sure you \u2013 I mean, I haven't done a cold plunge. I can tell you that I do like the cold. Like we sort of touched on that earlier. Like when you just go outside into \u2013 like sometimes it's \u2013 Canadians complain about the cold who live in the city, but when you live in the country it's different. The city, winter sucks because like they put salt on the roads and you're basically running from your house to your car. But in the country, when there's \u2013 you go outside and nature and you walk into the woods, there's no bugs, there's no mud, everything's frozen. You can go places you can't go in the summer, in the winter. You can walk across lakes. You can walk across huge lakes to islands that are over there with warm, you know, bath [2:08:01] in Canada goose jacket on. This is something about walking across lakes that I don't like. Oh, yeah. I don't like it. I don't like it. It's sort of like \u2013 I kind of was thinking to myself, I was going to say, you know, it's sort of like a cold plunge, except it's just \u2013 you just go outside as a cold plunge sometimes. Yeah. You know, it's like you do get a can like, I've actually noticed that in warmer climate, sometimes I'm a bit more lethargic, you know, but when the winter comes, it's like, okay, go outside. It's like, you know, you feel that, you know, it's just. Well, Letterman, you always have a studio really cold. Yeah. You want people to be warm and sleepy. Yeah. Yeah. A little cold, a little. Ha! Keeps the calmity fresh. Yeah, yeah. But there's something about walking across a lake that is just like, yeah, at any moment now, let's get this break. Oh no, no, well, because you know. I know you can't. And I'm like, I went ice fishing last year. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I get it. Now people make mistakes all the ice. But if you're properly advised by people that know what they're doing, like the people [2:09:12] that some of my friends out there do a lot of ice fishing, they tell you, okay. The other thing you can do is, like when I was playing hockey on the lake this year, you just stay close to the shore. So you go, okay, well, if I fall through, it's only two feet deep or three feet deep here. So, you know, you won't actually be sucked away under the ice, but walking across in the middle, yeah, you have a little bit more danger is out in the middle there. But I'm sure you've seen the video of the Russian woman who jumps into the river. Oh, yeah, yeah. So horrible. Oh my gosh They cut a hole in the ice and she doesn't realize it's a raging river underneath it and she gets sucked under. And I heard that just happened recently in the States too. A woman's dog or something went in. Oh, God. God damn it. Yeah, the... That's fucking terrifying. The idea being trapped under the ice. There's another one of a guy who's trying to, they cut two holes and they try to swim from one to the other and the ice is clear and you see him under there. [2:10:06] You couldn't figure where the hole was. You see him get disoriented and then you see him trying to find his way back to the other hole and then he does eventually find his way but there's this sort of moment of panic where his friends are up on top and they're banging on the ice and they're trying to say, no, no, this know, you could see him like sort of feeling and when you panic you lose oxygen Yeah, your body your heart rate goes up. It's like not good not easy to keep you there. It is right there I want to see this man Stop it Jamie. I Remember the first time I saw the concept of of falling through the ice and in the winter was that remember that movie never cry wolf You ever seen that movie, Never Cry Wolf? You ever seen that movie? That was a good movie. Look at this. Yeah, and this is real. There's their trying to say, this way, this way. And then he goes back all the way back. [2:11:00] He goes all the way back. Yeah. Oh, the music even makes it. What is he doing? They had a rope, he found the rope. Is he gonna make it? Yeah, he ends up making it, but yeah, there you go. So I think you want a cold plunge in the leg closer to shore. Bro, fuck what that is. Whatever that is, fuck what that is. Jesus Christ. You're so close to the whole scene when you- Yeah, he was like a foot away from the hole. And he couldn't tell. That's nuts, man. You ever see that movie, Never Cry Wolf from the 80s? It was about a guy that goes up in the Arctic to study wolves, and then he ends up, you know, befriending them, and Brian Dennehy's plays the evil trapper and it was a... Oh, one of them movies. Yeah, it was a great movie. It was based on this Canadian novel, Farley Mowat novel called Never Cry Wolf. Yeah, did the wolves really make friends with him in real life? So he goes up to... And the novel. It's a novel. It's a true story. He goes up to... About a scientist who goes up to study these wolves. [2:12:12] And, you know, it's just sort of man versus nature kind of story. We ended up becoming a Disney movie, but he ends up running out of food. His food gets dropped off in the wrong place or something like that. So he ends up sort of seeing the wolves eating mice so then he ends up the big scene, probably inspired some of my work later in life. He starts eating mice off crackers and stuff like that and it was big Oh gross outse needs the mice off the crackers But but then he ends up falling through the ice at one point walking across a lake and there's a scene like that and it's one of those you know Back in the 80s Pre-CGI movies where you're just sort of remember you had to come up with actual scenes where something relatable and shocking happens that you can actually really like grips you, you know. Yeah. And then Brian Denne he shows up and well, you know, he kills the wolves and it's very sad and that's the end of the movie. So you don't have to watch it anymore. Well at one point in time people did have to have become friends with wolves because that's where dogs came from. So when wolves came around the campfires, there must have been some curious wolves and there must have been some generous hunters who threw them a [2:13:08] bone or threw them some meat and that's how dogs got made. The bitch-ass wolves were like, oh I'm happy to be your friend. I don't really want to hunt deer anymore. They were cooking some nice, you know, woolly mammoth steaks here. I think that smells better than the leaves we're eating. Smells incredible. Yeah, yeah. Especially with a wolf nose. That's how good I am. Oh my God. So we made friends with them. And that's where Charlie comes from. Charlie comes from a wolf. Yeah. I was, yeah, I've watched some of your episodes where you talk about wolves because I'm really finding myself interested in it because this is I Hear them at night like at night like not every night, but I You hear them howling and she goes crazy so in the house at night you hear them [2:14:01] And so so we'll she'll hear them before you know from in the house at night I Don't hear them, but all this and, you know, three times a week. She starts running around the house, barking, barking, barking. And then we go out in the porch and you hear them howling in the distance. And so they just, so this summer, and I know this happened to you, I had chickens. I got chickens. I got chickens in June as well. I had six chickens and, you know, eggs. You know, I'm getting eggs from got chickens. I've got chickens in June as well. I've got six chickens and eggs. I'm getting eggs from my chickens and I'm eating a lot of eggs now. Eating a lot of eggs and they free range, right? So I just not fenced in, right? But the woods are sort of \u2013 there's a pond and their woods are on the other side of the pond and it's kind of a pasture on one side. So, you know, debatably the wolves and the coyotes don't come right up to near the barns where the chickens are, right? So I've let them free range. So in the morning I get up and I let the chickens out and then they spend the day walking around on the lawn and the grass and then sort of a more, you know, closer [2:15:00] to the house area. And this was great all summer. It was great. I named them. It was like Loretta, Patsy, Shania, Dolly, June and Anne. They were my girls, you know. Give them all female country singers names. And then they were bonded with them in a way. Like they're kind of sweet, you know. Actually would take, sometimes I'd bring one in the house and like hang out with it and play piano with it and it was like, you know, it was, I mean, it's getting weird, but it was, you could tell it was interested in the music. Like there's an intelligence there that's, no, I mean, no, chickens aren't known for being the most intelligent thing in the world, but you would see their wheels turning, listening to the music. I kind of become attached to these chickens, you know? And then, yeah, so I get a bit more comfortable with having them free-range. They free-range all summer, and they're great because they're eating all the bugs and getting all the, you know, insects and stuff on the property and around the house. And so I drive into town one day, okay? [2:16:02] So I'm gone for two hours, okay? And I come back and I'm coming up the driveway and it's just feathers, feathers, feathers, feathers, and there was one survivor, Loretta survived. She was sort of, funnily enough, there was one chicken that didn't hang out with other chickens all the time and this one Loretta, I named her Loretta, and she was probably just somewhere else but the spy just got killed by the coyotes and I saw them on my security cameras. I came right up to the house. And so the thing is, it's like you realize, and I realize this even more after talking to the wolf expert, they were watching the house from the woods and they saw me leave and they knew that there was nobody there and they chose their moment, the wolves or the coyotes that did the chickens. They like waited. Like they waited for me. They knew my truck. They knew there was nobody there and they said, you know, one good thing to do if you [2:17:03] leave, you know rate play talk radio You know, maybe they'll hear that but so They were watching and they they came and they got five of them all at once and it was chickens were gone There's just feathers everywhere like like even like it almost looked like a bomb. It hit the chicken It was like just a big Circle of feathers and there's five circles of feathers chicken, it was like just a big circle of feathers and there's five circles of feathers. It's weird to come upon, right? And so then I have this one chicken left and this is actually kind of sad too. It's funny like I literally cried. And then my, because I was like so upset and then, and then, and then my neighbors, you know, or farmers, you know, or buddies of mine, you know, came over and they were like, oh, look at the chicken feathers everywhere. And I said, you know, it's like, you know, is this normal for me to be crying about this? And I said, do farmers cry? They go, not over the dead chickens, you know, I'm like, I'm like a city guy here crying over my dead chickens. But, but so then, yes, so then I got two more chickens to keep Loretta company. And this is kind of breaking news as of yesterday. [2:18:08] These two new chickens came and they hung up Loretta for the next sense, I don't know, August. And then, well, this is a downer, but yesterday I got a call and the two chickens killed the killed Loretta, the ones, the one that was from the different flock, you know? They pectored a death last night or two nights ago on the Mildonite. Oh, Jesus Christ. Yeah, that's a downer. But anyway, so now you're like, okay, so that sucks. So I got these two fucking murderer chickens, and I'm planning to get more chickens in the spring, so I'm gonna get rid of the two chickens. Yeah, you have to start from scratch. Start from scratch because I can't keep these new chickens around. They're fucking murderers. Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. And they're like, hi, I'm your friend. Like, no, you're not. You killed my other friends. And they, exactly. And they were friends for the, well, they were all together for the last, you know, you're supposed to do. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm. I know. Yeah. Put them. Hey, would you like these two murderers? Don't you don't want to rehabilitate them either. [2:19:05] Just like. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, apparently you'll let. Put them on the grill. Yeah, I was told you hang them upside down, just hold them upside down for a while and they kind of black out and then you can. Don't you want to get revenge for Loretta? It's a strange, well, you know what, here's an interesting thing about revenge, because I've been thinking about revenge. Well, I was thinking about revenge with the coyotes. So, and so here's the thing that's a very sort of odd thing. You know, I love the coyotes. I love the wolves. Like, I love them. Like, I love hearing them at night. And I love seeing them. And I photograph them. I've had many moments where I've been engaged in a standoff with them. I filmed it. And so I kind of was really mad for a minute and then I thought, well, you know what, I think I like the coyotes more than the chickens, to be honest with you. So I'm just going to kind of figure out a way to kind of, you know, control the situation. But also, watching your show with \u2013 forget who it was, but it was an expert in this area [2:20:09] and talking to people apparently like if you try to \u2013 again, this is all theory, but apparently if you try to completely control the population of coyotes by \u2013 It makes more coyotes. It just makes more coyotes. Yeah, Stan Flores. Yeah. He wrote a book called Coyote America. Darrell Bock That's right. He was when talking about that, where the coyote actually... Darrell Bock The female coyote has more pups. Darrell Bock Yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's... Darrell Bock That was what I was talking about earlier, where they were prosecuted by the \u2013 wolves would kill the coyotes, the coyotes would expand their range. And then they would repopulate new areas where the gray wolves weren't. And the way they would find out how many coyotes are around, they'd call out to each other. It was on the show that I heard that. When someone is not responding, the female starts to panic and have more pups. Yeah, amazing. [2:21:00] It's pretty wild. And that's why they spread all across the whole country. Yeah, you're in every city in the United States of America in the cities now Yeah, they're everywhere every single state as coyotes. Yeah, it's pretty nuts, but I love them too. I think they're awesome I definitely wanted to kill them after they killed my chickens. Yeah, but that's also it's like I'm not in the country either bitch I'm in a fucking suburb. Yeah, this is ridiculous right. Yeah, you don't want a little small wolves in the suburbs. Yeah, you don't want little small wolves in the suburbs. Yeah, you know, but they're Everywhere in LA. Mm-hmm coyotes are downtown. They're everywhere. They're all over the place in Los Angeles. They're just little wolves yeah, I I Remember they used to come up to my place that place in LA that was that we did the web show The coyotes were a lot of coyotes around I saw saw Bobcat on that street once. Those are cool. And those are cool to see, right? Yeah, I was pretty stupid actually when I was there because I first saw the coyotes and I had this idea, oh, I like the coyotes and I would, when I go grocery shop, I buy some chicken desserts and I throw them on the hillside. Oh no. And then they really Yeah, duh. You can't feed coyotes. I'm sure a lot of people in Hollywood do though. I'm sure they feed deer. I'm sure they feed coyotes. [2:22:09] I know people in my neighborhood feed deer. People love having deer around. I know a guy's got, not in my neighborhood, but he's got like 20 pieces of 20 acres of land, and he's got at least two feeders. So like at every day at 5 p.m. you can look out his window and see deer because they're there to get fed. Yep. Yeah, it's beautiful. You been hunting lately? Not lately. No. Planning on going out again or come to Canada, come hunting Canada. I've been there before. I've wanted to... Your government like seriously worries me. Yeah, you know, come up and run for Prime Minister. Let's change that. Come up, run for Prime Minister. You can do it. It would be amazing. How do you say his name again? Pauliev. Pauliev. Pauliev. Peter, Pauliev. Sorry, Peter. [2:23:00] No, the people would love to have you up there. Not everybody, but a lot of people would love to have you up there. You know what it's like. There's some people with blue hair up there that don't want nothing to do with me. Yeah, yeah, no, but I mean, I think I want you to know that you are loved by so many up there. And then it's people that... I love Canadians. They're awesome. I always said Canada has 20% less douchebags than America. Just very similar to what it's like here with the division. It's the same division. That's why you say bullshit Stop it. It's it's not just the same divisions in the same bullshit. That's true, too But that's also a ploy that's being used to separate ourselves why they enact more control and that's what's scary That's what's scary. It's like the underlying mechanism like what's what's what's actually happening behind the scenes Well, they're trying to clamp down and control the population That's that's scary They're trying to clamp down and control the information the population gets that's fucking scary. Yeah Yeah, as of that doesn't ever come back. Yeah, once they get that power. They don't give it back to the people Yeah, never happens. So you had a fight to stop that from happening Yeah, can't let them decide what you can and can't do because they're just people. I mean, there would be outrage in Canada if your show got banned, if got blocked, because [2:24:10] people, everybody watches your show. I mean, it's just like here, everybody watches your show, everybody loves your show. It would be outraged. It would be political suicide. It could happen though. It could happen, especially if there's some new COVID type thing happens. And I have contrary experts on, I have people on that are like Robert Malone, the guy that they maligned and said it was a conspiracy theorist and that he was a, you know, it wasn't a qualified expert to talk about the subject, even though he's vaccine injured himself, even though he owns nine patents on the creation of mRNA vaccine technology. I mean, he's vaccine injured himself, even though he owns nine patents on the creation of mRNA vaccine technology. I mean, he's a legitimate scientist that worked on that technology. I think the Canadian public values freedom of expression and speech. Right. But the Canadian government doesn't. That's the problem. It's, again, they haven't passed that law. [2:25:04] But the thing is, if they do, and there's calls to do it right now in America, it's they haven't passed that law and and but the thing is if they do if they try to and there There's calls to do it right now in America. Yeah There's also calls to do it from the World Health Organization to try to put a kibosh on any Information that doesn't jive with what they're saying in the case of another Situation another pandemic or another I, Google released that thing where they were saying that they had some new regulations that would be put in place in cases of a special event or, you know, anything of extreme social or political, like some thing where they're going to be able to stop air quotes, misinformation. That's fucking terrifying because oftentimes that information turns out to be correct. I love your approach to it and your stand-up, your new stand-up is hilarious. I won't say it obviously, but it's just hilarious because it's very self-reflective too and I just thought it was just amazing because you're kind of, I won't say it, I don't want [2:26:01] to say it because obviously you got your show coming up. Thank you. Appreciate it. But I thought it was even people that may think they disagree with you on some subjects probably are going to really find it quite pointed the way you address the issue in your stand-up set. I thought it was awesome. It was hilarious, yeah. Thank you. Thanks. Amazing. Well, it's obviously something on everybody's mind. It's just, we're in a weird pivotal moment where technology and our awareness of corruption is all meeting in this battleground, in the middle of the fucking field, like Braveheart, like, that's what's scary. What's scary is these two things are colliding, and I don't know which one's gonna win, because we could turn into a dictatorship. We could, we could turn into something that's closer to a dictatorship and then something that's closer still and continue to go down that line, especially if there's some need to clamp down on society because something happened, whether it's a solar flare or whether it's a terrorist attack or whether it's just [2:27:04] flat out war, it's all that we need. All that we need is some reason when they need to completely clamp down on your ability to express yourself, platform's ability to distribute information that's contrary to what they're saying, any of those things, anything that they can do to stop that, to put a clamp down on people, like disrupting the narrative that they're trying to distribute? It's wild that COVID was essentially one of the catalysts that got me to leave the city. And it started with the van. I got the van and I'm out in the remote desert and I'm loving it out there. And I was my in the remote desert and I'm loving it out there. And I was, you know, I was my bug out van. I mean, I had, I had probably, probably could have survived in that van with a solar power battery system and my food. I'd freeze dried, you know, meals ready to eat, you know, camping food, boil water and pour it in the bag and, oh, it's lasagna. [2:28:01] This is amazing. You know, I could have probably spent, you know, months out there without even having to go anywhere, you know. And you start to go, hey, this is kind of cool, you know, like I'm self-sufficient out here. I'm not, you know, I've got 26 gallons. You didn't get lonely? Well, I would drive out to a cool place for three or four days and then I'd go to another location and then- So you'd go and hang with people? No, I wasn't. I was just doing this sort of... Isolation. I was doing this... I was really actually kind of getting into videography again. I got some... I shot this video on Sony A7S3 but I started getting back into cameras. Robert, you weren't around any people? Well, I was... When you went to cool places, did you go hang around people? No, no, I was just alone, yeah. And I was making these, it was just Charlie and I, we made this sort of, you know, film. How long did you go without being around any people? Well, cause then I would go, cause when you came here, the last time was Tom Hanks. You had the fucking volleyball? [2:29:06] Yeah, yeah, yeah. You seemed a little manic. It was somewhat of a creative experiment mixed with real paranoia as well, because I do sort of, I think sometimes like I said, you know, I got testicular cancer. How the fuck did that happen to me? So I'm just like, okay, this is everything bad. If this is happening, it's gonna be bad. So it's gonna be bad to me. So I'm just gonna, and then- So how long did you go without being in contact with any other people? Well, so I still had my house in LA. So I hadn't sold my house yet. So I had this van so I would drive out into the desert for a couple weeks and basically go on a camping trip and then I'd go back home and then Were you around people when you were back home? So it was still that people would come over we'd hang out outside it was that kind of whole thing for the first few weeks or whatever months, however mental was it? Remember there was a couple of months Would you like cover your mouth and then you'd all run outside hold your breath? Yeah of, just hang outside for a couple of months, go to the dog park and see people there [2:30:06] and stuff like that. It was that initial stage where, cause you weren't in LA then, no. So it was wild. I was in LA. Were you in LA at the beginning of COVID? Yeah. Oh yeah, the first time I moved to in COVID. Oh, that's right, because the second time I came on your show was here. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. That was like, you're avoiding the question. Remember how there were military helicopters going over? You're avoiding my question. How long did you go without being around people? Maybe a couple of months or something like that. You know, how many months? Like, well, couples to a few is three or more. Maybe it was three. Yeah. You sure it wasn't more? Well, then I started doing the van thing. So there was nobody where I was going anyway. So I had an excuse, you know, I was on a camping trip. Still being with no people. How long were you with no people then? Yeah, I mean, it was a few months for sure. [2:31:01] I'm not. I mean it wasn't... But I'm told how many months do you think you spent of that year without being around people? Well, first of all, one thing that's interesting about it as I happened to be single at the time. Are you a lawyer? The way you're answering these questions are like a goddamn lawyer. Well, it's a bit embarrassing, I guess, to think that I was isolated. No, it's not. But I also found it kind of fun. Right, but how long? Like it was like, it was about three or four months or something like that. But then the van. The van. You went around people then too. No, but that was... That's isolation too. Yeah, but that was more like I was enjoying going out into nature by myself and... But you were still by yourself with no people for how long were you doing? But I'd go for a couple of weeks and I'd go back to LA and I'd be in LA and then... And you would be around people. I'd recharge a bit and be around people a little bit and then I'd go back out again. And then as things died down as they did, you know, I started being around people like everybody else. I couldn't imagine going months without being around people. Well, the thing that was weird about it was I, you know, I'm not married. [2:32:01] I was single. I didn't have a girlfriend at the time. So like I actually No responsibility true freedom. That's what made it weird was I didn't you know I didn't I could imagine if I had a girlfriend at the time We just okay. We're gonna isolate together now. You're just with your significant other here. I was Okay, I'm gonna isolate and I don't have a significant other at the time So it's like actually the first time where I've ever had this sort of self-imposed Actually the first time where I've ever had this sort of self-imposed or whatever maybe was imposed on us, you know, or I took the, took it, I took it as an opportunity to be by myself and go out and make videos in the desert and go to these really crazy remote places. And I would seek out places where there wasn't going to be other vans and other people. But when you were out in the desert, a lot of times you'd go to somewhere and there'd be other people out in their vans and you'd hang out and have beers with people out in the desert and hang out and then you'd go think of a more remote place. And I started discovering some amazing places like that, you know, the rabbit hole you go down when you, you know, COVID aside, isolation aside, just going out into the American Southwest in a camper van that's self-sufficient is pretty wild, the stuff that's out there. [2:33:07] I mean, I think I probably talked about Chaco Canyon the last time I was here because I think I'd just gone there in New Mexico, which is, you know, Pueblo Native American ruins of \u2013 it's essentially like a stone ruins of a city that was built in the year 875, 875, and it's like Machu Picchu level type city that they didn't even discover until the 1950s because it was buried and now they've, you know, and you're, and it's in this beautiful, it's on the Navajo Nation reserve, you know, on the Navajo land and you feel this sort of, I felt sort of somewhat shocked, I guess, that there's all this stuff out there that you don't really hear talked about constantly. Like I hear about Machu Picchu, somebody brings that up once a week. Nobody's ever brought up. [2:34:01] What are you talking to? Brings up Machu Picchu once a week? I don't know, it just comes up a lot. People talk. It was probably you, I think. You talk of pyramids and stuff. I rarely talk about Machu Picchu. You talk about the pyramids a lot. Yeah, I talk about that a lot. The pyramids. Machu Picchu is pretty crazy. Talking about ancient cultures right here in New Mexico, just up the row from here, like an 11-hour drive from here, just outside of Albuquerque, Navajo Nation, it's a huge canyon, completely empty, no one there. And so it's this realization that there was a civilization there that was, and they've studied this place quite extensively. In fact, Mike Judge from Beavis and Butthead, his father, Mike Judge grew up in New Mexico. I found this out after the fact. So I started looking up information about Chaco Canyon to try to learn a bit more about it. And his father, James Judge, his name was one of the predominant researchers of this particular archaeological site, right? [2:35:02] Oh, wow. And so he wrote this book about it, and they dived, you know, he spent his life diving into details, yeah. That's fucking cool. Yeah, so I spent like, you know, a day there. And there was no one there with you? I was there with Charlie, yeah. And just you and Charlie. It was me and Charlie, and I shot video, this was video on my YouTube channel too. I was doing all this for my YouTube channel. I was really getting to the filmmaking side of it. You know, I had my drone. I was going out and filming stuff in all these crazy... Isn't it crazy? You're just allowed to walk around there? Yeah. It's wild. And see that bottom left? See that sort of structure there? So that was a five-story building at one point. And you can go walking through there and there's wood that they've used as beams that's still like within the, within the petrified wood or whatever, it's within the stone. And you know, it's wood from the year 875 to 1100. It went like the people left there in 1100 because of a drought. [2:36:01] Like they were gone before Columbus, right? See the wood there? That's from 8, you know, between 875 and 1175, whenever that was particularly built. So, and this area, they done all these studies of this area, so they know like, like they found macaw feathers, speaking of my old pal Rex, they found macaw feathers there. Now macaws are from the furthest north is Yucatan Peninsula, Mexico. So they knew that people were coming from Yucatan Peninsula, Mexico, up here to trade with them. And they found evidence of all these different things that sort of indicated that people were coming from as far north as Canada, as far south as South America to come to this area. And that whole Chaco Canyon area, once you get in there, is like this, I don't know, not to get all like voodoo about it, but you know, when you talk, people talk about Sedona and there's the energy there, you feel this sort of, and it may be just because [2:37:04] it's so beautiful and it's so quiet and it's this natural kind of amphitheater where it's silent and the wind is dead and you're just all alone and you're walking through this structure. I share the fascination that you have for the pyramids. I want to go there someday. I think it would be \u2013 if I could snap my fingers right now and just be somewhere, it would be the pyramids. I'd like to go to the pyramids someday. I've never been there. So here's me walking through it with my camera. And so you're walking through this, you know, by yourself and you're just going like, wow, like there was all this stuff going on here. And apparently they've determined this was like a meeting place for people from all over North America that would kind of come here and share information. They actually believed that there was sort of almost like a festival type atmosphere that would happen there where people come and trade and share information and all this stuff. [2:38:01] Is there, are there similar Native American construction sites like this? Yeah. So then you go down this rabbit hole and you realize that they're all over the place. So then there's \u2013 Really? There's \u2013 there's \u2013 I mean, there's \u2013 there's many of them. There's up in \u2013 there's \u2013 these ones called the cliff dwellings, which are \u2013 that one there is actually \u2013 this one here is actually later. That's post-Columbian, this one. This was a Spanish, probably, I think this one's built around 1500. This was a- Similar constructions style. Yeah, exactly. It's amazing, right? When you look at it, they were building stuff in 800 before Europeans had come here using the same kind of building techniques as that. And it's weird when you're there and you're touching it and it's like solid and you're going, wow, that's actually. So they've got these cliff dwellings. There's lots of them where they've built into the cliffs of Colorado. Yeah, those are cliff dwellings. I went to one of those ones. There's one that's called the Gila, or Gila National [2:39:03] Forest. It's right on the, yeah, it's up in the border. It's up in New Mexico, Gila, or Gila National Forest. It's New Mexico. Yeah, it's right on the, yeah, it's up in the border. It's up in New Mexico, I think, yeah. And that's a wild story there, because it's a national park, you know. And, wow, look at that. Caves. So you go walk around there, and that one, there were a couple of people walking around. They drive down. There's a, you know, people walking around. Did they dig these caves or these caves always exist? They're natural caves that they've kind of sort of utilized as, you know, they built the walls up around the bottom of it. Yeah, they've done something to it, right? And so this place is wild. And the stories you pick up when you go to these places, because then you go down the rabbit hole, you start reading about it and you go, wow, I never knew about this. They didn't just, no American had ever been there until the mid 1800s because it was Apache territory. And if you went there, the Apache, you know, would kill you before 18, whatever it was. I forget the date, but it was like in the 1700s, [2:40:02] early 1800s. Look at the writings on the walls. And this place, I haven't been to this place yet, but I want to go here. Oh, shit, man. Yeah. And yeah, I talk about like when you start thinking about UFOs and stuff, you look at some of these petroglyphs and you go, what's that? There's a lot of pet real reason I was out there in the van by myself so long was because I got addicted to it, I mean I was just, and that's actually kind of why I ended up moving. I was like, I love being out here alone by myself with my van and my camera so much. I want to live in the country again. How'd you find the spot in Canada? Well, I got kind of lucky. I just kind of, I just honestly just started looking on the internet, you know, just like looking at real estate listings. And I started looking for a farm near my hometown. And I just kept looking and searching every day. And I was lucky that it just kind of fell on my lap right at the right place, right [2:41:01] time. My house sold in LA immediately and I drove back and that place, I put in an offer and I got it and it just all worked out and it all worked out. And how long you been out there now? Be coming up on three years in July. It looks like you're having fun. The videos of you online are very interesting. I'm like, look at Tom Green. I'm enjoying it. I'm living in the woods by myself. It's like, there's a lot to do that is stuff that falls outside of anything that would fall under the category of what I would consider to be work, right? But it is work, but it's different work. It's like, I gotta feed the chickens or we built a fence this year for the mule in the donkey. So it's this patent rail fence that is made out of cedar that is literally these 100-year-old cedar rail fences that are on the property that have fallen down in the woods and have gone by the not used anymore anymore and we went back with a fence builder, you [2:42:06] know, and everybody out there is, you know, you know, in the country is a guy whose family is traditional fence builders whose grandfather built these fences. We went salvaged all this wood and then built new fences out of them. Oh, that's cool. And so you kind of, you know, it's nice to find something to do that is A, you're outside, you're getting exercise. And you feel like you're actually doing something. You feel like you're doing something. And it's the first time I've, I said this earlier, I'm never going to leave this place. Like it's the first time I've ever lived somewhere where I know I'm never going to sell it and leave. And so every step of my life, like everyone as you're growing up, you've got your first apartment, how long am I gonna be here? Tell me if you're... Right. How long am I gonna be here? So now I'm just kind of like... Now I just do my head, I have like, oh, I'd like to maybe build a log cabin someday on the backwoods, you know, so that's sort of one thing I'm kind of thinking about how I want to build a log cabin like the way the house itself that I'm in was built in 1857 and it's a [2:43:11] log house. So then you can see the- Do you have photos of the house? There's, yeah, on my YouTube channel- Do you have a video tour of the house? I haven't really, there's not a full tour but I think if you can see some of the house? I haven't really... There's not a full tour, but I think if you can see some of the logs on the YouTube channel, I did a couple little sample podcasts where you can see the wood in the background. That's fucking dope. This was last week. You live in a log house from the 1800s of the wood burning stove behind you. That's amazing. Yeah. And it's interesting. So, you start to realize, I'm doomsday prepping in the van, you know, like, oh, I could be self-sufficient in this van. Well, I also, you know, and again, it's fun, but it's also kind of very functional. Like I have unlimited fuel, okay? Because there's wood falling in the forest forever. [2:44:01] And every summer you can go out and I've got a wood splitter, right? Like a \u2013 it's a gas-powered wood splitter and you chain saw up the logs, you drop them in, the wood splitter splits them and it's sort of an efficient way of getting firewood basically. So they'll never run out of wood out there. The house has actually got propane sort of a furnace as well. So it runs on propane and the propane truck comes every, you know, there's no natural gas or anything running into the house to heat it. So you have a propane truck comes every couple of months and fills up this propane tank in the winter. But, you know, if, oh shit, you know, shit hits the fan and the propane truck doesn't show up, you know, I can still heat the house fully with wood. There's two wood stoves. Do you have solar? I have solar. There's a solar system that was there actually that, but it doesn't actually connect it to the house, but it's connected to the grid and it's actually selling energy back to the power company. [2:45:01] But not to you? Not to me. No, it's, it's. It's a... What kind of scam is that? Well, it's paying me. It pays me. Yeah, I get paid. Pays you to not be self-sufficient, to not be connected? Well, if shit hits the fan, I can unhook it and plug it into the lights. Yeah, I could, yeah. Do you... And I actually know I have van has solar panels on the roof and there's this for electronics. It's for electronics Yeah, and you can't really use solar for he I've learned all this from the van So I work with these guys who've been really cool battle-borne batteries. They're called and they are Make these batteries lithium batteries, right? They make them for boats. They make them for now off-grid houses and and And so I have like a couple of bunkies, you know, like the one I built and one that we kind of set up. It's like a prefabricated building that we put back in the woods with a wood stove in it and, you know, this trailer that I have solar panels on that butterfly out that I can [2:46:04] take anywhere on the property which has These battle-borne batteries in it. It's constantly charging. So I do have some solar and the barn as well. So the barn I have and These guys helped me set this up. It's really cool. Like it's uh, I Mean I jokingly say the podcast that I'm gonna do in the barn is going to be I'm sure sure it isn't, but I'm saying it's the first solar powered barn cast. Okay, maybe. It might be? Maybe, I don't know if there's one. But it's like, cause there's no, the barn has no power running to it, it's off grid. But we have, you know, it's, you know, 200 yards from the house, but and then up in there I can run all my cameras lights everything and Don't the batteries degrade on those things on like solar panels. So lithium batteries. I have a really good life to them Um, I'm not sure but they eventually degraded. It might be 10 years or something like that. I'm not sure [2:47:03] but it's it's the that's the the lithium batteries is kind of newer tech. Like it's like, it's, that was the thing that kind of, you know, when I've, when, when COVID happened, I want to get a van and go in the desert. So then I, you know, I figured out who was making these vans. And then I found out about the battery systems. And then I was like, oh, you just have a regular plug in the van. You plug in your camera and charge your camera batteries. You can run your laptop. You can charge your phone indefinitely. Spending so many years of my life running around making goofy videos. When we were doing the Tom Green show and stuff, you'd go on the road and then you have to go back to the hotel at night to charge your camera batteries. The idea that you can go into the middle of the desert and just film and definitely charge your camera batteries because the sun is recharging these batteries constantly. It was dope. [2:48:01] It was dope. I built a recording studio in the van. Nice. I built a recording studio in the van. It was making music and beats out there and just kind of getting into it. But so it's... How long did it take before you felt comfortable around people again? I was ready to get around people again pretty much. I mean, it's funny. After I came on the show last time, and we talked about this. Like, there's a general perception in the world all of a sudden that I was living in my van. Okay, which I wasn't actually living in the van. I might have been responsible for that perception. No, it was hilarious. Like, oh, I heard you're living in a van now, people would say to me. I'm like, no, I'm you're living in a van now. People would say to me, I'm not gonna live in a van, I'm going camping and making videos in the desert. But you were living in a van. Yeah, I was. You just had the ability to live in a very nice house. Exactly, I wasn't actually. It's not like you're a loser. No, it was funny though. But it was, I mean, I hope, I mean, oh, am I a loser? But like people would sort of say it to me. Like they're sad. [2:49:05] Like they were sad. Oh, I heard you're living in a van now. Because you could be like most people don't live in a van on purpose. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So it was kind of like the Chris Farley sketch. I am living in the van down by the river. And, and it was funny how I mean, again, the power of, of social media and the size of your audience, you know, it permeated out there pretty big that like pretty much everybody I meet thinks I'm living in a van down by the river now. So. Well, that's like how we describe Hans Kim. Hans Kim used to be living in a van. Like look at him now. You know, no one goes from, you know, Tom Green to live in a van. Unless things have gone horribly wrong except you. You did it on purpose. And it was really driven by the fact that this power system allows me to go make videos in weird places and stay there. These places, Choco Canyon, it's not easy to get there. It's easy enough. [2:50:01] I mean, two and a half hours out of... No, maybe it was more than that out of Albuquerque. I forget the distance, but it was quite the drive. And you're driving through \u2013 it's not on a direct route to anything. And then once you get to the perimeter of it, really bad dirt road that you got to go down that's not maintained properly. So I suspect that in some ways it almost feels suspicious that like do they want to keep people out of here for some reason. Why is it not talked about more? I mean, I sort of discuss this a little bit on the video. It seems strange that it's not more celebrated by our society, that there's stuff out there like that. It's incredible and amazing and beautiful. It doesn't have a good publicist. That's all it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because there's certain things that have like Machu Picchu. It's a great publicist. Yeah, I think it forces people to confront the idea that, you know, what happened to the Native Americans in this country too and in North American Canada, you know? Well, not that. We weren't that nice to them, were we? So, it makes us have to think about what happened. But you were just saying that that place was abandoned in the 1100s. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So, that has nothing to do with the Europeans. But just in general, just talking pre-European, not now, right? But I think there was probably a period of time when they were settling Europeans, not [2:51:12] just America, Canada too, right? Settling North America where they didn't really want to acknowledge that there was civilization here before. It was more like they were... Trevor Burrus Eminent domain. Yeah. more like they were, you know... Eminent domain. Yeah. Yeah, they were trying to claim it. Yeah, for sure. I think there's definitely that. There's a guilt attached to the way people feel about Native Americans, and also just the understanding of what a reservation is. You push them into this area that sucks and force them to live there, and all of their traditional land is gone. It's all but absorbed by these people that just got here a couple hundred years ago, which is nuts. It's so hard to imagine how different this place we're sitting in right now was just two hundred years ago. I mean, they find these all over the place. [2:52:01] A friend of mine has a ranch out here. Oh, wow. That's a real Comanche arrowhead. That's a big one too. Wow. That's probably something they used to shoot a large animal with. Wow. That's probably elk. They had elk out here. They used to have elk where in like most states, they had always a lot of deer out here, a lot of different animals, but that's a big ass arrow. Yeah. See, and it's like- Cause there's some small ones too that they find, just find real tiny ones. They might be used for like small game birds and things like that, but that's a big fucker. See, I personally, the second I touched this, I felt sort of a sense of kind of shivers. Wild, right? Yeah. I feel like, and maybe it's my mind just thinking about the history of it, but there's, you know, people talk about energy and I was like, is it, is it, when you see here, people say when they go to Sedona, the energy there is amazing. And I'm like, what are you talking about the energy so much But it's like you touch this and you go I think somebody actually like carved this [2:53:07] Mm-hmm somebody made this and then they Survived with this right however many thousand years ago or whatever and they whoa that's incredible Yeah, they napped that thing and made it sharp and they did all these crazy techniques that they had learned How to make these fucking things and then they hunted with it and these people lived here forever until these Europeans just came in like a wave of locusts. Yeah. Yeah. And so that's the battery system allows you, you know, the van and the self-sufficiency of it. Because normally if you drove there, let's say you drive six hours to get somewhere, right? Right. And then the sun's going down and there's no hotels nearby and there's nothing. So you're gonna, you got a camp and a tent or something. So then it's like not comfortable and you don't have, you don't have any van. Yeah. So now you can drive there and stay for a while and then it's like a different... [2:54:00] You just have to make sure you have gas and water. Yeah, it's a different experience because now you're waking up to the sunrise over that and making coffee by yourself. And looking at that. Thank God you didn't run into like the Manson Vanley or something out there. I had a few moments of... Did you? Of wacky people? I had a few moments of, I don't know if they were wacky people, but your mind starts telling you that you got to be careful. Like there was a moment out in the desert where I was all alone out there in a truck, just on the Mexican border actually, and trucks coming from Mexico towards me. And there's signs out in the desert when you get to this. This was actually on the Arizona, Mexico border. It's this place called the Cabiza Prieta Wilderness Area, which is a decommissioned section of the former Barry F. Goldwater Air Force Base test range where they would test bombs in World War II, right? And it's like really beautiful, like the cactuses and the- [2:55:04] You want a cigar? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Absolutely, I bet you that's a good one too. I'm sure you wouldn't be smoking some with your sweets or something like that It's not a it's not a century Sam or Philly's blunt. What are there? It's a company called foundation cigars. They actually made us our own cigar It's got JRE logo on it. Nice. They're really good though. I was skeptical about this company, but it's actually, my man Nick from Foundation, really knows cigars and the whole deal goes down to Niggerod. For some lighter as well? Yes sir, you know how it works. Push down on that black thing. Yeah, there you go. Damn, okay. it works pushed down on that black thing that yeah there you go. I am okay. So what was the most sketchy of encounters while you were out there doing that van life? Well, you got it. [2:56:00] You lit. What was the sketchiest? There was never anything where I actually was in danger, but there was the feeling of being in danger. So, well, actually, it might have been in danger. It was definitely a feeling of being in danger. So the van's coming up to you? Yeah, it was like a truck. You're in the van. Yeah. And there was, like, I could write it off in my head if I'm trying to be, you know, positive. They were hunters, but they, you know, they didn't necessarily look like hunters to me. They were not in hunting gear, but they all had guns. But they were rifles. They weren't like, you know, assault rifles. They were hunting rifles, and so they could have been hunting. There was four guys, and they, you know, they were openly brandishing their rifles. No, they were sitting all four of them. This is what was weird, four of them. They were probably hunters. They were probably going hunting. They were sitting like this and they were sitting like this and their rifles were standing. They were holding their rifles like that. So I kind of assumed that they were going around [2:57:00] looking for a deer or something like that. But it was, when you're all alone out there and you see a truck coming towards you and there's no one around, no one's gonna hear anything. You know, you get nervous. So I did get in the van and I locked the door and I'm in the van and I'm looking out of the van and they pulled up by the van and they're looking at my van and I see the guns in the van and I'm like, okay, this is- Are they speaking Spanish? Well, they were, you know, they were, you know, whatever, 50 feet, 100 feet away, just looking- Do you hear any words at all? No, no, I had, I was locked in the van, you know, hiding. I was hiding in the van, just turned 50 years old. So they never got close to you? No, no, then they drove away. But there's this sort of, you know, five minutes of watching the truck get closer. And so you go to the Cabeza Prieta Wilderness area and it's along the Arizona-Mexico border and you know what the border's like. So you know, there's a lot of human trafficking and drug smuggling going on there and as well as immigration going on there and people coming across the border illegally and all the stuff. [2:58:01] And so there was actually a sign when you drive in there that says, danger, human smuggling, drug smuggling, do not travel alone. Okay? So I still go because I'm with Charlie, right? So I'm cool. But so I, you know, but the sign, I got a picture of the sign. It was kind of interesting, but it's also- Is that sign on your Instagram? Probably is. Y'all for sure. It is, yeah, if you scroll back to, if you scroll back to whatever that was three years ago, yeah. I wanna say that. Yeah, yeah. And so, yeah, danger, humans muggling, drugs muggling, do not travel alone, right? So I of course, stupidly go out there and I'm camping out there for a week. But then you haven't seen anybody for five days, you know, and you're out there making videos and making ambient music, drinking beer. I have a fridge in there, I have a nice fridge in the van too, so I've got beer, I've got some whiskey, I'm just having a good time out there making music by myself. And streaming, not always, but sometimes you'd have internet, so you'd stream. [2:59:00] That was sort of a connection with the world, streaming live from the middle of fucking nowhere, the world's so crazy now, and making beats in the middle of nowhere. But yeah, so that was, you know, this moment where you're going like, well, maybe I shouldn't be here by myself. And that was actually when I, that was actually what, that moment was actually what kind of, actually tell the story when I do stand up. So I'm trying not to make it a bit here because sometimes I don't want to do my bit, but like I do kind of incorporate it into my stand up sometimes because I tell stories about this stuff. But I ended up \u2013 it was what in sort of spawned \u2013 I mean, I went back to LA and I bought a gun the next day. I didn't have known the gun since I was 21 years old. I had a 22 when I was like 20 or 24 years old, I had 22. Had known the gun the whole time I was in LA. I was going out in the desert by myself feeling vulnerable by myself out there. So I went back to LA and I went to [3:00:02] ... Especially see four dudes with rifles. Yeah. And so then I went back to LA. I went to... Especially see four dudes with rifles staring at you. Yeah. And so then I went back. Yeah, there it is. Caution, illegal entry and drug smuggling activities are common within the refuge. Be aware of your surroundings. Do not travel alone or approach suspicious people or activities. Holy shit. Yeah. U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service. This is probably, yeah, Department of the Interior. It's probably Bureau of Land Management land is a lot of the land out there too. That's scary. And you realize how big it is. Like you know it's one thing you know you hear about you know in this close to the cities where there's happening going. But when you go to these remote areas right and you're just yeah that's it that was it. That was the week I was there. That was right when that happened. There's just nothing out there. So I went back to Burbank went down to guns plus and picked up a 357 Magnum and Benelli Montefeltro silver shotgun and got my hunting license and went quail hunting. Why would you get a? 357 Magnum I six shots. I got the seven shot. Oh, yeah, because I thought that would be better to have one more [3:01:02] No, honestly, I just, I honestly didn't really actually think about it. No, I didn't, no, I did think about it. I just, I didn't honestly think that I would ever have to use it, to be honest with you. I just like that gun. I just think it's a beautiful looking gun. Well, it's better to have that gun than no gun. Yeah. Yeah. And I also thought, honestly, though, the other, the other, I actually have another answer to you because I was going to lots of places with bears. And so I figured it would be good protection for bears too because I was going up into like the places in New Mexico where there's bears and I would go hiking by myself and you know, I'd lug a shotgun around with you all the time. So you know, I'd sometimes bring that, you know, in Arizona and stuff. That's smart. But also, I mean, you know, it's honestly just kind of, I don't know, it's just beautiful gun. It is. Yes. It's classic. Yeah, I like that, I love that gun. Something about a revolver too. Yeah. Watch that wheel spin, old timey style. Yeah, absolutely. And there was sort of a sense of being out there [3:02:02] on the range, you know. I like classic looking Guns like I've now I have lever action. I've been collecting Henry rifle. I have a new Henry 22 I've got a couple vintage. I gotta just picked up like I look getting sort of vintage I've just five or six rifles and I've just sort of found myself quite interested in it. I've got an old Savage 99, 1970s, 308. It's like the wood. The old guns, the wood on it. It feels like real and all the newer stuff is more plastic and stuff. A lot of carbon fiber. Yeah. Yeah. So I like them as wood. You got to get your hunting up there. I would love to go at some point with somebody that knows what they're doing. I live with some friends that really wanna take me out next year, so. Oh, go with them. Yeah, local guys. Yeah, local guys, yeah. Yeah, I bet you have a shit ton of deer up there, dude. There's a lot of deer at my place, yeah. You can see them on my trail cam video with with the with the she will one deer you eat it for three months yeah yeah feel the freezer fill the freezer with it one deer yeah you're eating it for months [3:03:08] mm-hmm you know shoot elk six months I see your elk on Instagram and I go and that looks good so much meat yeah so good to so good for you I give it away get away a lot of my friends yeah it looks good such a good thing to have there's not a lot of elk near me. There are elk, but they're rare. Like you don't see them in Ontario that much. Do you hear them? Do you hear them ever? Moose. Moose. Yeah. I've seen a moose once near my place, but deer all the time. They're everywhere. Well listen, Tom Green, I'm super excited that you're at the comedy club, the comedy mothership this weekend. It's an honor to be there, man. It's a honor to be there. It's always good to hang out with you and talk to you. And I can't thank you enough because being on your show in 2007 really was a big part of the inspiration to do this. And I would say you were a pioneer, man. You had figured it out before anybody. You had a full internet talk show running from your house. And when you had me as a guest on it changed the course of my life because it really did because it really was like, I remember like light bulbs [3:04:09] just going off my head like, why don't I do this? I didn't have the money to do this. You know, so I started off with a laptop. It was like the idea came out of you. Well, I just think it's the coolest thing that you, you know, shout that out and say that to me. And, you know, because I appreciate it because it's like, it was when you came to do the show, I was stoked that you were coming to do the show. You know, that was, you know, I'm doing my little web show and you came up and did the show. I was, you know, that. just kind of a one of those that was fun yeah it was fun yeah and we did a bunch of stuff I've always seen you around but there it is yeah bro it's like 2007 yeah we're drinking beer this guy's got it nailed yeah we're on the internet this is incredible I was so happy I was like this is how to do it look how bad the [3:05:05] video was back then. The kid was drinking with us online. You know, what's fun about that is like, so that's Skype. We're taking calls on Skype. And so we kind of, I had some real good guys working for me. I had my Jamie there. It was like really, you didn't, you never had a Jamie bitch. Yeah. Yeah. He was sort of, we were trying to build stuff, you know? So, you know. You guys had a whole server room. I remember walking to your server room going, this is crazy. I feel like I'm at like some big corporation where all these lights are going off and I'm like, Thomas is wild. So there's a microwave antenna on the roof of the house. So that was the way we were able to stream because back then you had to get like bonded T1 lines or something like that Which were expensive right I had a little bit of monetization not much, but you were working with the company out of Denver Yeah, yeah, then they were kind of the first people that I saw streaming So I was like how's that works? I called them and then so we had a little like a very small budget But enough to get them happen to those guys they just kind of I don't not sure actually I don't know I'm not sure but they were they were interesting guys and so I basically started with them and [3:06:08] then I went off on my own and well listen I'm glad you're gonna do another one because you're a very compelling and interesting person and you always have a really good perspective and you've led a fucking wild ass life and I appreciate you thanks for being here brother thanks thank you and I think the shows are all sold out this weekend. Yeah. Tough shit, motherfuckers. But sometimes even if the club does sell out, we have a sign, like a neon sign that's tickets available now. What happens is sometimes people can't make it, babysitter cancels, who knows. But every now and then even on sold out shows, there's tickets available so if you go to the box office maybe get lucky. Okay, thank you everybody. Thank you Tom Green. You're the fucking man. Oh, Instagram. What is it? Is it just Tom Green? Yeah, Tom Green Live. Yeah, go check out my YouTube channel, youtube slash Tom Green. Put a lot of stuff up on there now, which is kind of a little and then Tom Green on Instagram, Tom Green Live on Twitter and X and Y'all. That's the spots tick-tock and I'm shooting a special actually I'm shooting a special for Amazon Prime stand-up special and [3:07:08] Well, I'm gonna I'm gonna do I'm gonna shoot it in Ottawa, but I'm also doing a tour in April So I'm going through I'm gonna be in Cleveland. I'm gonna be Lexington, Kentucky Louisville of Detroit all over Michigan You know helium and Philly and a lot of the spots so you can go check out my tour and I'm gonna film the whole tour to and I'm gonna kind of cut it together into a bunch of nice stand up Montage, so yeah, thanks. I'm excited. I'm excited