#2095 - Moshe Kasher


24 days ago




Moshe Kasher

4 appearances

Moshe Kasher is a stand-up comic, actor, writer, and co-host of podcast "The Endless Honeymoon" with Natasha Leggero. His latest book, "Subculture Vulture: A Memoir in Six Scenes," is available now. www.moshekasher.com

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Episodes from 2024

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Yeah, they just want to start to save the universe and then they want to fuck everyone's wife. Oh, yes Yes, it always begins. Yeah, yeah, the dimensional portal will open and then ends with you can't fuck your wife anymore But guess who can yeah, what happens is first they start stockpiling guns. Yes Yeah, it seems like Cult leaders have to have guns because they're faith in Their ability to see the universe and all the good and everything is Not quite good enough. You need an AR. You need an AR to really get your point across. You need maybe some flash grenades. I mean, it is interesting. It doesn't feel like, it feels like I wouldn't do that. If you were running a cult. Well, I wouldn't fuck your wife and make you like worship me. I would just... We're a very nice guy. I'm one of the nicest guys in America. You're a very nice guy. I just wonder... I don't know anyone who doesn't like you by the way. Is that true? Yes. I've never met anybody like that guy's a dick. Oh, that's really cool. No one. I love that. Everybody likes you. You're a good guy. Yes, it's a good thing to do. I try to really, I work at it. Really hard. Well, you see people, by the way, and you see that they've made a decision. Like I've met, like I met Sting. And I go, okay, Sting at some point along the line decided I'm going to be like awesome. Yeah. That's going to be my thing. I'm going to do yoga every day. Yeah, I'm going He doesn't come right he doesn't come yeah, he's like one least guys Know what I'm saying. He was so nice when I met him that he released oh, wow interesting. Yeah, I have it I have it at home all my in my office is a little jar of stink come when he goes he probably really I think what is the deal with that? That's why I said don't stand so close to me Because he blasts your way the tantric thing they're supposed to have an internal orgasm, like they're supposed to absorb it internally. Right. I've never, I'm too lazy. What takes time? Yeah. You have to like discipline yourself, and then you can come forever, I guess. It seems like you're thinking about your come too much. That does seem like it. You're spending so much time doing that. A lot of time focused on calm. I mean, there's probably a benefit in it, but every benefit that you get off of something [2:06] that's a difficult endeavor is a detriment to something else. What do you think the detriment, oh, just your mental energy? Just too many time thinking about your gizz. It's fucking weird. I mean, it's like, you know, I mean, I guess you could say that about a lot of things though, right? You could say that about like people who body build. You could say that about, you know, maybe you're thinking too much about one thing. Well, I guess that's like kind of, in a way that's what this book that I just wrote is about. It's about these like- Show me your book. These little- We wrote a book, dude. Congratulations. I've always very impressed and also very, very like proud of people who write books because I know this is a this is a fucking task man It's an endeavor, but it's one that I like a lot of standups really don't like it and they feel like it's homework I like on stage I do a lot of crowd work. That's kind of my thing and this is the like [3:00] Creative opposite of crowd work. It's it's not just your material, it's like, it's like mega your material, it's like you're a monk kind of creating a thing or whatever, like you should write a book. I have thought about it many times and I had a deal to write one once, but as I was writing it, they were trying to get me to write it like stand up and they wanted me to write it in a way that was funny like you'd be on stage. Like how much laughs would you want permitted on stage? Which I kind of don't really think about even stand up that much. I just try to, I cut out the bullshit, I edit things, you know, economy of words with bits, but I don't think like how many laughs I have permitted. They were like very specific about it. And then they said, how about this? Why don't you just transcribe your stand up? And I was like, listen, I have a very different idea of what I want to write than you do. So I'm going to give you your money back. I gave them the money back. And I said, I'm just going to, if I'm going to write something, I'm going to write it on my own. And I did for a little while. And then I stopped. But it was a lot of it. It was just like, I only have so much time to write. And I would rather write about ideas than I'm gonna do on stage. [4:06] But I do have an idea about my time. I've been working on it a little bit lately. So I'm thinking about actually going forward with this. It's about my time when I was in my really early 20s and I discovered pool halls. Oh yeah? I saw the two pool tables. I didn't know you were a big pool guy. Yum obsessed. Yeah. Yeah. If I'm not, if I'm like for like my empty my brain time, I watch professional pool matches. Is that right? Yeah. Oh, interesting. You like this trick? I watch them with no, no, I hate this trick. That's bullshit. Bullshit. Okay. Hey, that's what I was gonna say. it's great. That's a good movie. That's a great movie. Just as a movie, you know, the color money as well. Are they connected? Yes. Yeah. Same guy Walter Tevis, who also wrote the Queens Gambit. Oh, that amazing chess player. She was an orphan. That's a great series. That series is really good. But that Walter Tevis guy was amazing. He [5:02] wrote, the hustler is really like a psychological drama as much as it is about pool. Yeah, I remember, I saw it a long time ago. I don't like remember it, but I remember it that it's great. Yeah, oh, I could literally say every word by heart. It's just pool hall that is to hang around in white planes in New York. They used to play it on the television all the time. In the pool hall. In the pool hall. Yeah, my friend Steve, who was the guy who ran the desk, who, you know, ran, you know, administered people, the balls, assigned your tables and stuff. He used to just put that motherfucker on like every time we were there. We'd never get enough of that. So what was your thing? You go into the pool halls when you're're how old were you? Well, I was like 20 when I really started playing I think I was like 23 or 24 somewhere around them and It was just my me and my friend John who's also a comic we went into this pool hall just for fun And you know, we're just bored during the day. Well, let's go play pool neither one of us knew how to play pool [6:01] We're terrible, you know like we'd played a couple of times right and then We just new how to play pool or terrible. You know, like we'd played a couple of times. Right. And then we just stumbled into this pool hall that had this insane array of characters. All these people that were criminals and hustlers and homeless people and people who lived in flop houses and people who were fucking insane gambling addicts that would bet on raindrops coming down a window pane. They would bet on fucking anything man. They just wanted action. They were teens walking in there? What's that? You were guys were teenagers going in there. No, no, we were about, I was, John's a little older than me. I think I was 23 or 24, somewhere around then. It's like, yeah like 90 so yeah I was probably 23 and I just remember thinking like this is a whole world that I didn't know existed this weird bachelor culture and apparently it emerged really in America in the early 1900s in the early 1900s [7:02] in New York City there were hundreds and hundreds of pool halls, hundreds of them. And they were filled with these men that were disconnected from society. A lot of them had really returned from wars. A lot of them had gotten out of prison. And they were, it was, you know, during the Depression, there was a lot of illegal activity and people did whatever the fuck they could. And these men would gather in these pool halls. And there were some of the wildest people I've ever encountered in my life. I watched a guy who had just gotten out of jail play chess with his, just with words, just saying where the pieces moved, with a 16 year old kid was a chest genius. He wasn't even moving the pieces. He was a little bit to this. No, there's no pieces. Oh, they were playing mind chess. Mind chess. Oh, wow. It was like some commander data shit. These are exceptional people that just happened to never plug into regular society. What's like that dude in Malcolm X's autobiography, the guy that like he ran all the numbers in his mind and he never forgot a single one and Malcolm X said like he could have been like a mathematical genius [8:09] or a statistical professor or whatever but instead he was like a hustler. He used that genius to be on the streets. There's some people that have genius power that they apply to an art form but they could have applied it to any like Jay Z. Jay Z doesn't write any of his lyrics. Right. If you read Jay Z's lyrics, they don't seem ad-lib. They seem like really well structured and written and like funny and like sharp. And there's so many of them like, how? How are you remembering all of this? That's what people call me the Jay Z of comedy. You've heard that before. You've never heard a person not say. Yeah, it's coming down the pipe. It hasn't gotten here yet. Do you know there's a pool hall in LA by the way? Really? There's almost none when I left. There's one in K-town that you go there. I get it makes sense. You go to a Korean's play pool. Yeah, you walk in and you walk into one of them if you're white. And they're like, uh-uh. You're like, what? I want to play pool. They're like, uh, uh, next, next two doors down. They're all playing here. They're like, uh, uh, well, they do whatever they want. [9:08] They have their own rules. And then you walk down and that's where the white people are playing pool. But it's the same owner. Oh, that's hilarious. But by the way, you cannot complain. No one yeah yeah yeah I get no time for you people are shooting people l-a-b-d why would you reject it access to a Korean pool hall it feels very wrong yes I want I want someone to intervene immediately this was horrible I may white male like maybe if you work your way up through the pool tables in the white one then they'll they'll adopt you into the Korean one if they know you maybe they're probably gambling. That's probably what a lot of it is. I would have a word pool comes from pooling money together. The game is called pocket billiards. It's not called pool. That's really interesting. So it was just a gambling game for the people that had returned from. No, it was a game, right? But I think all games eventually evolve into gambling [10:13] Right people gamble on basketball all the time people gamble on fights all the time like fighters will gamble against their opponents People gamble they like to gamble it makes things more exciting because now there's money on the line as well as pride and everything else Are you allowed to bet on fights? I am not. You are not allowed to be honest with him. I am not allowed to. Now, when did that happen? It's a recent rule that came about because apparently there's an allegation that one of the UFC trainers, I want to be real clear about this because I actually like this guy a lot and I think he's super talented trainer and I do not know if this is true. So I want to even say his name, but one of these trainers was apparently aware of injuries and then informing a group of people online who are betting. So they're saying like, hey, this guy's got something wrong with him. He's not gonna win this fight. And then all the money would go on the opponent [11:01] and then they would rake it in. And this happened allegedly on fighters that he was training or people that he knew. It's like insider stock trading. It's similar. Yeah, it's fishy also because it gives the possibility that fights are dives. You know, when a coach is betting against their fighter or giving other people information against their fighter, if that happened, I don't know if it happened again, I just want to real clear. It's allegedly. If that's the case, that's kind of like, it's next door neighbor to a dive. And that is the last fucking thing we want in mixed martial arts is fixed fights. Right. Right. Which is weird because it's owned by the same people as own WWE now. Right. It's kind of crazy. They've had a good week. It's a great week. Yeah, it's a good week to be in the WWE. Yo dude, that fits make man is miles. That boy's out there. I read this, I couldn't get through the text messages. I started trying to read him and I was like, I don't want to read. This is like poison. You put the thing is when I see that dude with his shirt off, he's 80 years old, he's got a chain around his neck. What are you shocking me with this information? Don't you think it takes a lot to get that [12:10] guy going? No, it's, you're saying he needed to send all those text messages to get a rouse at that? I think he probably needs a lot just for stimulation. Listen, he's a billionaire. He's been running pro wrestling for fucking decades. He's world famous CEO of this giant fucking multi national company, pro wrestling company. He's also in pro wrestling. He gets out there and competes. He does it. Or, you know, performs, let's just say. At a certain point, I guess if you're that through the looking glass of reality, like you become a heel in life, life is heel and everything is a match. Yeah, if you're gonna be really successful at putting together pro wrestling, probably be pro wrestling all day long. You gotta stick with it. Yeah, like stay in it all, fucking day long. Don't go read Nietzsche at the end of the day. Don't be reading cally-y-yungs thoughts on flying saucers. [13:01] Get the fuck out of here, drink beer and go fuck. That's what you should be doing. You're on the road, I want you to rick flair it until the fucking wheels come off. They do come off too. Well, yeah, I'm almost all of them. The only one who hasn't is the rock. Rock is in remarkably great condition, obviously huge and massive and muscles, and everything, but mobile, he can do things. Like we worked out together. That's interesting. I wonder, because he also seems like kind of the most, he's one of those dudes who's got, like what you're talking about, genius level. He could have been anything. Sure. He's kind of got one of those mega IQs feeling like. Well, he's got a mega discipline. So what he has. Right. And if you applied that to intellectual endeavors, he be a mega genius. It's like, I think that we want to think that they're not connected, but I think they are. And I think like a Michael Jordan or someone who gets that good at basketball could get that good at anything. It's just they don't apply themselves in that area because that's, I think it's just exceptional people. Well, you know, there's that weird idea. And I apparently this is proven that the difference [14:01] between a world championship runner and the number five is like less than a second their speed right I mean the difference between the Olympian and the guy that doesn't make the podium is so it's just infinitesimally small and then the reason that the person wins is because they believe that it's not even a physiological thing it's like a confidence thing and you see that you run against Usain Bolt right here we'll take him out of the book what you believe because then there's genetics genetics are real to what genetics is probably I would guess is what gets you to the to the stage in the first place it gets you on the track it exists intellectually too there's there's that boundaries I have limitations I have like certain limitations intellectually certain level I just check out. I'm not gonna, but I am friends with some insanely brilliant people that scare the shit out of you. If I talk to Eric Weinstein, I'm like, what are we even the same thing? What are we? We're not the same, we're barely the same thing. You know when you really see that kind of geniuses [15:01] when they start talking to you in a way you'll understand. You go, oh, so you wrote that book that I can't even comprehend, but you're also conversationaly able to help me try. You know what I'm trying to say? He does something I try to tell him, like you got to help us out here. But it's just because that's how he thinks and that's how he communicates. It's like, if you're going to talk about comedy to someone who doesn't do comedy, you'd probably just start talking like a comic. This is what we do, this is what we do. I'm not gonna, I can't hold your hand too long, you're 40 years old. Just explain how I do it. Either get it or you don't get it. I am, on that pool thing though, that universe, when you walked into that pool hall and saw like, bam, this is another universe. To me, like that is, that's the experience of my life over and over again. That is what the book is about. Is these like, these momentary portals into another universe, you know, where somebody taps you on the shoulder and goes like, walk over here. It's like Luke Skywalker, right? Like, he's this weak, powerless kid on Dan Tauena, or whatever. [16:01] And then all of a sudden, nobody wants to know because it goes, look, there's a whole other universe here. We show everybody's shoes because I think those are Luke's shower shoes. That's what's gonna say. This is bullying, Joe. I love them. I couldn't remember the name of the planet though. When you said tattooing. You think these are tattooing shoes? Yeah, yeah, sure. These are cool. Joe came in and almost liked Almost like them. I felt pretty good about that. They're unusual. I love that you wear them. They look great with white slacks or tan slacks This is so close to a compliment. It's a compliment. You have a style. You have a certain style They're the most comfortable shoes. Chain out to look at you. Yeah, always chain out all day Well, if I'm coming to if I'm coming to Joe Rogan I'm picking the chain out You know Let's freaking go. I say let's freaking go for the kids. Yeah, let's freaking go. Let's freaking go. Let's less offensive. Freakin' or freaking? Like if you're around an old lady. I think freaking is more fun for an older lady. Right, it's not offensive at all. Cause she's an old freak herself. Maybe. She might just be an old freak that hung in there. Never understood the concept of censoring yourself for an older person. [17:05] They've, they've heard the thing. Right, but the idea is that every, that is true. But that every generation gets more and more desensitized to bad words. Oh yeah, that's fair. Which is 100% true. Yeah, I can see that for sure. Like my kids say things that I would have never said in front of my parents. Oh, in front of you. But you're also, you're you. So you've created a person who are swearing, it'd be funny for you to be uptight about swearing. It is funny. I bet you did though and you had little kids, right? No, I'd never was. My wife was a little bit, but not bad. And I was like, listen, we have to just tell them that you can't say But they're just words right with the only thing words words are a sound you make so I know what you're thinking right It's all it is and to make words good or bad is fucking stupid But there's a lot of things you're gonna learn. They're stupid in the world But here's the rules but in there around the house They'll use them for funny and it's hilarious. It's like you're raising comics because we all talk like comics They'll talk shit, you know, it's fun. Totally. I had a conversation with my daughter the other day, [18:05] I go, I sat her down, I go, okay honey, you're funny. And with great power comes great responsibility. I go, you're gonna have to figure out how to like where the line is. Because people who are funny, take it from me, walk through the world offending people because they think they're being funny and they've gone like a step too far in personal interactions. That's your job now. And it's also like when you're doing that, like people have to understand like, why would you have said that? Like I didn't know I was gonna say it while I was saying it. Completely. Like there is a thing that you're doing when you're creating specifically when you're ad living where if you're on stage you're ad living, you are literally like you've got these missiles that are coming into silos and you like launch it. Launch it, launch it. Like you're even looking at the missile. It's like your mind says maybe you can connect that to this, go. And sometimes it just like, it's a dud. And sometimes you're on stage and you go, oh, I've, oh, that was the end. [19:00] Yeah, I wish that that missile, that missile destroyed the story. I show myself. It During the village and everybody in it. I've definitely had that experience But yeah, there was a moment on my on my I did my crowd work album crowd surfing where I heard myself When I was listening back to it. I was riffing one riff and in that riff switched back and did the better riff like that's a pretty Speaking of like the way the brain works. That's a honed brain that comics have. Well, you've got that, you've done that exercise over and over and over and over again. So you get like super comfortable in that pocket of crowd work. Like Big J. Ogerson is amazing at that. One of the best, yeah. He's one of the best ever at that. He's just so Andrew Schultz is as well. They're just so comfortable. There's a fucking hilarious one that Schultz just put out of he's talking to some guy in the audience who brought a date and the date turns out to be a trans woman. And it's just as hilarious. But fun, lighthearted, positive, it's really cool. [20:00] It's very skillfully done. Right now, it's a skin, and the whole audience loved it. It was like, they loved it. It was great. Well, that's how I think of crowd work when it goes really well. Everybody's having a good time. Yes, it's like a gift. It's like a gift to the crowd, because they know in their mind, I will, this moment will not be reg, this was for me. Right. I'm gonna give you tonight and it will never exist again, except in TikTok form, hopefully it'll go viral a million times. Forever. Well, I always think about that when everybody's blowing up on these crowd work clips is like how many magical moments, but there's something beautiful about this too. How many magical moments you offered on stage in the pre-digital kind of upload everything era where you're just like, it was just momentary. It was just an offering to that moment. Yeah, there's something really beautiful about that I love that I think that's like it's important. I think the artificial Reality of digital life It there's certain people that want to fucking film everything I want to film every conversation they have look [21:03] I'm here with this let's let's put this on the gram Will you tag me in this like stop? It's it's a wild it's a live I saw a guy the other day his thing is he goes to Red find dining restaurants and screams at the top of his lungs. That's his that's his career Oh my god see the guy that got arrested that was just dumping shit on people Now that I respect he dumped a whole bucket of shit on some guy that was like on a train. Just shit on down his back. Yeah. And then we said it's a prank. It's like a guy who has a kid and you know, I mean, I think we were talking about it. I said I think it might be bio terrorism because there's not like shit. Human shit is like really dangerous. That is definitely biohazard for sure. Like humans are gross. Like our fucking gut bacteria, if that gets in a cut, human shit gets in a cut, you better wash the fuck out of that thing. Talk about going viral. What? We're going viral. This joke is landing. Exactly right. I wanted it too. Viruses. [22:01] Yeah. Yeah. Literally. Please don't write in. That's where plague comes from from That's the early days it was a lot of it was like terrible hygiene and terrible sanitation and no running water So people are just shitting the streets there shitting in buckets and throwing out the streets as human feces everywhere Do you know why people think perhaps the Jews didn't suffer as much in plague? Other than conspiracy theories that they started it during the black plague There was a conspiracy. There's way back then they did it. I'm I'm pretty sure yes I don't know where that number would have come from so how did they survive it? So Jews when they eat a meal every single meal with bread always wash their hands It's a part of the ritual. It's a ritualistic thing. You wash your hands before you eat bread, and people didn't really do that, because germ theory wasn't, people didn't know about germ theory. They didn't understand their correlation between washing your hands and eating, and so Jews would always wash their hand before every meal, and that is how, apparently, they sidestep some of the ravages of the play. Do you think that a lot of the religious rules [23:08] like washing your hands, it has to be based on some ancient understanding of where diseases come from. Like think about no pork, right? The trick no success. The trick no success. It's ubiquitous in porks, in pigs and bears in mountain lines. They all have it. It's like a giant percentage of bears have it, a giant percentage of pigs have, especially wild pigs. So that would prevent you from ever getting that. Let's just say, no one need, simple, don't cook it to 147 degrees. I don't know what the fuck that means. I don't know when the right way to cook it, it kills people. Let's stop eating that and then shellfish. Same deal, red tide. All sorts of other bacteria that you get. What about mixing linens and wolves or whatever? That's a weird one. But like the shellfish one, people dive oysters. I just read about someone dying from a raw oyster. It's super rare, I still eat them. [24:01] Yeah. Which is a really stupid thing to do. You know, like why am I eating oysters? If they can fucking every one out of a million people gets whacked by an oyster. I didn't I did not know that. Yes, I mean, you could die just recently. I can't eat the whole life. I'm like, we're thinking my oyster consumption. My kid leaves live sea urchin. Well, she's more adventurous either than I am. Yeah, yeah. Straight out of the carcass. Damn. It's moving a little bit. That's my favorite sushi. Man dies after contracting Vibro volnifitious bacteria from fresh oysters and Texas rest. It's right here. Oh shit. You're going to, no you're good. The consumption of raw oysters in a Texas restaurant led to the untimely death of a relatively healthy, relatively weird word for a dude in his third, you know, we're talking about here. Relatively healthy. What are you trying to say? It's a lot of editorial from the USA today. Yeah, it is relatively healthy. I wouldn't say. I wouldn't say. Hold on, Jamie. The man contracted a bacterial infection known as vibral volinitious vol-vol-nif-fitious. [25:02] He's my favorite techno DJ. It sounds like a good one, like from like Germany or somewhere, that thrives in warm coastal waters. So it's like local bacteria? I think you're good though, Joe. If he died and you said it's one every, every millionth oyster, he ate the oyster. It's probably more than one every million. Oh, look, the kind of lost his toes, yo. Oh, this is not good. I do not want fibro vulcan, the fuck in the news. Is it a flesh eating bacteria? Those are weird. You hear about those in the news every now and again. Fresh flesh eating. Ah, it is a fucking flesh eating bacteria. God dammit. I heard about those. I don't want one. No. That's my official stance on this. I heard about a kid that ate a slug as a dare. You read that story? Yeah, I realized in Australia. Super brutal. Oh, horrible. And then you start warned my kid, I go, don't eat slugs, but it's like she's gonna do some other terrible thing that I can't think of. Right, you never can protect them fully, nor should you. That's the unfortunate thing. It's like you've got to, they have experience a certain amount of like falling down. Right, it's part of the process. I just, but I did tell Doni Slug. Doni Slug. [26:06] The other day we were on the beach though, and my neighbor had a lobster trap out. And he took out his lobster trap, and he was undoing it, and there was this unrelating piece of seaweed. I think there's something alive in there, and we shook it off, and it was her friend She was like baby octopus my friend and they will bite the fuck out of you. That's what we found out every octopus is venom Oh, she didn't get bit every octopus is venomous and not most of them can't kill you But every one of them has a beak that will fuck you up. Yeah, they're all beak, but he was very cool Do you know how they kill them when they catch them? No they bite their heads. Who? Who that fishermen? They physically bite fishermen physically bite their head like right where the brain stem is and then they change color. That's another dead. They become pink. They come white. Whoa. Yeah they just when you see an octopus in the wild you're seeing how well they can camouflage themselves. Yeah, totally. Fucking insane. Yeah, it's crazy. Texture, everything. [27:06] They can look exactly like whatever the fuck they're near, whether it's coral or rubble on the ground, they literally blend in. It's insane, it's amazing. But when you bite them all that shit goes away. You like me. Yes. Do you have any, like, weird feelings about like an animal at a certain level of intelligence. Yes, like octopus to me I want to eat a monkey right well a monkey's yeah, that's very intense. Yeah, let's see Watch she's gonna bite the octopus So this guy caught this octopus and he's gonna bite it So he bites it and then the thing immediately goes oh he bites it like right where the eyeballs are and then it immediately dies This is the system by which you get octopus at a restaurant. It's just some bite-biting- I do not think so. Brains them of an octopus? I do not know, but I think this is just individuals that are sport-fishing. They're doing it for food. They're just getting that octopus delicious. They're smart, though, aren't they? They're too smart for me. Yeah. They bother I feel like I might stop eating octopus. There's animals that are really, pigs are really fucking smart. [28:06] Right, pigs are smart. They're really smart. That's where it starts to get weird because the... So the crows will bring you gifts. And the one you did at the cops are coming. There's this guy found this crow. It was in the water. It might have been a guy. It might have been a woman. I'm not sure. But anyway, there was some TikTok video about it and this person found this crow picked it up at the paddle It was in the water like drowning put it in the boat and then took it home and nursed it back to health and then the the crow would just hang out with her Yeah, they were like they were yo petting the crow with a brush and she put the brush back on the shelf then the crow flew over the shelf grabbed the brush Brought it back and said no, no, keep petting me. There's a really cool. There's like a whole mechanism on how to get the crow to like you too. You start doing a certain, I think it's leaving it gifts and then it will go, oh, this person gives gifts, then it will start bringing you gifts. And then if you keep going, it will start attacking your enemies. [29:02] Yes. Your neighbors will come over and be like, what's up, Joe? And then the crow will come down and attack. Yeah, this guy, Dan Flores, who's on the podcast before had essentially trained a crow by leaving it food every day. And he would go on a walk with his dog and the crow would hang out with them. Would it fly next to him? Oh, yeah, fly right next to him and go looking for them. I liked them. I had a friend who was a falconer. Do you know about these guys? I'm sure you do. Do you know how they catch them? It's crazy. No. Basically, they catch them in the wild. They leave some food out and they catch them with a trap in the wild. But then they take them home, this blew my mind. They take them home and they put them in a dark room for like multiple days and they walk into the dark room with one of those weird gauntlets or whatever that are made by the same people to make my boots and they have just meat on their hand and they just sit there for hours in a dark room with an owl or a hawk or whatever and over the course of a week the bird will get closer and closer [30:03] and then start nibbling and then start eating and at that point it's yours. And now it's your falcon. Whoa. Isn't that crazy? So it just rewires their brain? Yeah, to be like, this guy's got the food. So now when he lets me go to hunt for the rat or whatever, I'll come back to the gauntlet. Look at this crazy trap they used to get him. Huh. And every falcon that a falconer has is caught captured in the wild. Really? They're not like bread or whatever. They just capture them and then they do this weird thing where they train them and then they let them go after a few years of service. When I was in Scotland, there was this lady who was, she trained a variety of birds, but she trained owls and falcons and so she had a falcon there and she said the problem with the falcon is when they let it go It just fucks things up. It just flies. It just finds another bird and kills it like she like every time she lets it go Find something and kills it. It's just like an it's violent. Oh, it's the worst. It's a monster Right. It's just a killing machine. It doesn't matter if it's hungry or not It's just fine around looking to fuck things up. She said the owl is the second dumbest bird in the wild. [31:07] Really? Yeah. And they're crazy? How did they get the wise thing? Someone got a good PR agent and they just, they got ahead of it. Ow, baby, it's me. Owls are dumb. She said owls are dumb. She said the really smart ones are like, falcons are very smart crow's the smartest but The only things dumber than an owl is emus emus or dumber They're so big you think that they would have big brains. They don't have to be right there's shot Davaga give me the food right right right big they they are freaks I would say freaks of nature they shouldn't't exist. The emo. Have you eaten emo? No, of you? No. But I think people do. The eaton ostrich, I've had ostrichs. And it's fudruckers. At fudruckers, they have ostrichs. Fudruckers used to serve an ostrich burger. It was really good. It was good. That's my favorite. Yes, but there's a lot of really good ones. Access deer which are very [32:05] prevalent here in Texas. They're from India. They're really delicious. Yeah, but bison bison's very delicious. But they're very lean. Like if you're going to eat just those things, you got to make sure you get an adequate amount of fats along with them. You didn't moose. I eat moose. What's up with moose and good delicious. Yeah, most delicious greasy No, not at all. No, not even a little what's the wasn't very lean You get a funky pig You get a wild I shot a wild pig that was kind of funky Havolina that one was odd I ate a Havolina you feel when you kill an animal do you feel bad? I ate a hovelina. When you kill an animal, do you feel bad? I don't feel good. I feel good that it's successful, but you don't feel good when you look down at the dead animal. It's like a guilty thrill kind of. Well, you're thankful. Right, right. You're thankful that, I mean, this is, it's a very, it's a very different connection with food [33:02] when you've been there and harvest it and when you actually go in the wild. So it's one thing if you have a farm and you raise a cow and you kill the cow and you eat the cow, you have a connection with that food that's very different than me who just goes to a supermarket and buys a steak. Right. It's another level of that when you're going into the woods with a bow and arrow and Your climbing mountains and you go in eight ten miles a day. You it's like you swoop into their universe I wonder but you walk through the portal into their universe and just blip the matter I'm not the only one there and that's when it gets scary you mean there's other Predators right right right you meet bears out there. There's there's real shit out there right that is Capable of killing a deer with its face. Right. And a hunter from behind. Yes. Right. A hunter from behind. And a stealthy hunter that you're not going to hear until it's too late. Have you ever felt that? I've seen them. I've never been stalked by one. The biggest one I ever saw was actually inside of a car. I saw inside it like two years ago, I was with my friend Colton and he goes, [34:06] look at the cat, he stops the truck and it's at dusk, like right when the sun lights going down and I see these glowing eyes under a tree and we're about 30 yards away from it and I have binoculars, so I put up my binoculars to look at it up close. It was fucking terrifying. Mountain lion. Huge one. Yeah. A huge male, like 170 plus pounds. There's massive muscles. The muscles were so impressive. It's four arms or huge. They're so scary because they don't attack you until you're not looking too. So you'll never know they'll just be on top of you. You think you can fight one off? No. I'd be done for you wood. You got muscles. You could like, you scream in the yell and you can barely fight off a house cat. A regular house cat will probably fuck me up if it's motivated. Dude, I got a German Shepherd. Does it have great dogs? Well, they need a lot of work though. Listen, I was like, I don't know if you've noticed the last few years things have gotten a little bit weird. And I was like, okay, I'm on the road a lot. I know what I'll do, I'll get a German Shepherd and it'll protect my family. But then I entered into a negotiation with Natasha [35:06] because she didn't want like a hardcore one. So what we ended up getting was this giant fucking bitch. I mean, it's just such a little like clown. It's like the door dash people come and they met that we're in a ski mask. It'll be like, well, Aushan, Tay, right this way, come on in. Like, Oh no. So I have all of the work of a German shepherd with none of the, none of the... Is it a male or a female? Is it male? Is it fixed? Yes, there you go. That's my problem. Yeah, that's a big part of it. Damn, I'm actually gonna cut those balls. I didn't do it. Especially when they're young. If you get them real young in their fix, I had a dog that was fixed I got him from someone else and when I got him was like, he's already fixed, he's so young, it was too young. And he fucked, he was kind of fucked, it fucked his development up. He had no testosterone as he was growing, which is just not good for a male dog. There's still a lot of arguments that, look, it's irresponsible to let your dog have a bunch of puppies. And then, you know, so if you're letting your dog out and your dog is fucking other dogs and getting them pregnant, getting put, yeah. [36:06] That's irresponsible. But my dog's not fixed. And he doesn't go out. If he interacts with dogs, it's my friends dogs. You know, we play in the yard, I take it for walks. He doesn't get loose to go fuck a dog. It's not irresponsible. Does he ever got the fuck? He's never fucked. Oh, that's cruel in a different way. I'm afraid he would find out about it. No, he would never shut the fuck up. Like dad. Where's the girl? Where's the bitches literally? I don't know if you know this has been great. Do you know about this sex stuff? This is my favorite thing, and I don't even know about it till now, and I'm seven. That's funny, that the balls, but you keep it from ever having sex. Well, they can't not come. And if they're having sex, the girl can get pregnant. Right. It's not like humans, where it's funzies. Right. You know, there's no funzies in the animal world. Yeah. That's why deer only have sex once a year. We need to, is that true? Yeah. Well, they have multiple times in this one time period in a year, but it's called the rut. We should make a dog condom. [37:06] So I gotta work. No, put it on. If you love your dog and you wanted to get laid. Well, you give your dog birth control, I guess. Really? Yeah, but that would probably fuck the female dog up. It fucks women up. Right. Birth control's terrible for women. They would tell them women to take birth control forever. Birth control does all sorts of wacky things to the way you perceive people. It's, I have a friend and his daughter died. She had a stroke because she had a blood clot that is apparently one of the side effects of smoking cigarettes and taking birth control. It's possible to have that happen. And she died that way. She was like 17 years old. It's like, it's just tricky medication. I mean, it's great that women got their liberation sexually and every time you had sex, it wasn't like you're gonna have a baby that you could choose, trying to do it, what not to do it, but. Is that a flick of perception up too, having a kid at 16? 100%. Yeah, listen, there's arguments for both sides of it, and they put some girls on birth control for their acne to control acne. [38:06] I've heard about that. Yeah. So it's like, it's not saying that birth control is entirely bad, but if you're a woman and you have to take this thing in order to not get pregnant and the guy doesn't have to do shit, you know, like the guy, like if a guy had to take, if a birth control pill was invented for a guy and I think they did come up with one but it radically lowers your testosterone. It would be like my dog. Yeah. It would just be like a really sweet little bitch. Yeah, probably killers your sperm cells. It's probably the only way it would work. Yeah. So the way to kill your sperm cells would be either to ramp up your endogenous testosterone to where your body doesn't produce testosterone anymore. So you don't produce sperm cells or you could kill it. Kill the sperm cells. Kill the testosterone and kill everything. Make sure you head to just a feeble version of yourself. Well, that's why I tired all the time. [39:00] That's what I came on this podcast to talk about is mandated vasectomies for teenagers and teenage boys. And I think this will go really well. Yeah. It longs you can That's what I came on this podcast to talk about is mandated vasectomies for teenagers, teenage boys. And I think this will go really well. Yeah. It longs you can reverse it. Are we the ones that can be reversed or? Yeah, we can be reversed. We're good. We're not good. Obviously, we're going to get the unresses removed. With a dude, they can reverse it, but it's not 100%. you might have to do it a couple of times and make it stick people getting into that now Mm-hmm. The sanctumies are having a moment right now. Are you got one of them? Is that right? Yep. Okay. I mean good for her I get that yeah, it could be single and and you don't want kids like why why stand-hope did it to yeah, that's like a psychic Permanent condom and yeah and with no condoms Yeah, and then you don't if you're you know, you have a wife isn't work worry about birth control anymore. Yeah Yeah, I would not that that would terrify me. Yeah, it's a tricky operation. It's a dick operation Tell me operating on your nether regions and you're like what? [40:04] What I mean that sound like a terrifying proposition put you under an operate on your balls and then you wake up and they've castrated you and go, things went a little bit wrong. Yeah, I went sideways. Unfortunately, you don't have balls. The doctor had a psychotic break and just started chopping. Well, you know about that story of the guy who amputated the wrong limb. Oh! Because apparently they write in Sharpie on your limb like this one. Oh god damn it. this one off and then he did the wrong one It's funny. You know you remember that it's like it's just a person up there. I know a guy whose wife had the wrong kidney removed Oh, that's crazy. That's dead. That's a death sentence. Yeah, I don't it's like what the fuck did you just do and the doctor did not want to admit fault It's so the whole whole story is so crazy. Was the kidney that was a remained? Dr. D. Mammal, John. Oh, that's crazy. Yeah, kidney to remain was fucked. It was a bad kidney. Yeah, that was when they were supposed to take out. They took out the good one. Would you ever donate a kidney? Yeah. Yeah, I would just save someone's life. Yeah, I know people who have done it. Yeah, it sounds really intense. I would be- Apparently you can survive on one kidney. The liver is the craziest one. [41:05] We were just talking about that the other day. If you donate half your liver to me, if you and I have the same blood type, within six to eight weeks, your liver will have returned to full size. And my liver that you donated, that you gave me will be full size as well. It feels like they should, they could cure liver cancer by just doing elective half a liver in a lab growth. And then we just... Well, they're going to eventually be able to do that, I would imagine. They're already looking into some sort of reconstruction of organs, like to be able to create a completely new heart. It's made out of your own tissue so your body doesn't reject it. You know, because your body rejects other people's tissue. So if you gave me a heart, I would have to take the crazy medication to make sure that my body didn't reject that heart. Have you heard that? There's a documentary about that guy that was putting artificial tracheas in people? Mm-hmm. Oh, this is good. Or bad. It's horrifying. It was this like genius doctor that was putting in these plastic... [42:02] He had this... This like breakthrough that you could just replace a trachea with a plastic tracheal tube and bathe it in stem cells. And it would eventually like, I don't know what, like meld into your body's DNA tissue and just become a part of your body. But he was making it up. It did not ever, it did not work one time. Oh no. But he was just like flying around the world It's like medical like master they're going this genius the genius of our time winning like Nobel prizes and stuff and just people were dying They were just putting a fucking tube into people's throat instead of a trachea. Oh my god. Oh my god How many did he do before they got him? It was like a half a dozen or something like that. Yeah, it was really nice. So he's just an insane person. In this weird way, I mean, it's kind of what we're talking about earlier, he was a genius, but he was like a mad, he'd become a mad genius where he was. Just blew a fuse. He blew a fuse, yeah, and he thought, I have an idea, there's no way my idea won't work do it enough times. Oh yeah. Not caranee. And simultaneously he was hustling a woman like he [43:08] was pretending to be married to a journalist in America and then he was already married in Italy. So he was like kind of had two different madman thing going on at once. He's a wild dude. Yeah. So we should peel court convicted macaroni on Wednesday and sentenced him to two and a half years in prison. That's it. That's pretty crazy. Yeah. Once there's a wall up where you're a medical professional, I guess there is a little bit of an arm's like, I mean, these people did know they were doing an experimental surgery and that they could die, I guess, but they didn't know that it definitely wouldn't work. But they obviously decided that he did something wrong. They put him in jail for two and a half years Yeah, this guy was a wild one Jesus Christ compulsive liar spending wild stories and manipulating a woman who became his fiance The peel court ruled that two of the three patients who died did not require emergency intervention Oh my god, that was the part I forgot it kept it kept failed [44:01] This is the most fucked up part Joe it kept failing on sick people that needed new tracias. So he was like, what I need to do is find a relatively healthy person that has a tracheal issue like a collapsed trachea or something where they're still like walking through the world with Relative health like the oyster guy and I'll put it in them and that will prove that the thing works. Oh my god. What a psycho. Is that him? Yeah, that's him. Those are psycho. It was like, like George Clooney, if you got really fat, and you lay a lot of opium. Hahaha. Hahaha. What a psycho. Yeah, it's crazy. To do it on relatively healthy people, just to prove that it works. And it completely did not. Oh. So he literally went on a worldwide quest to find somebody with like a fucked up trachea but that what didn't wasn't sick and found someone like that and she was like cosmetic for her and she's like I'm tired of talking like this and I have to have like a scarf on and okay I'll do it. She didn't like the way her trachea looked. No I think she like talked weird and she had issues for sure okay but she but it was not life or death. Oh my God. Anyway. There's some psychos out there, man. [45:05] Some of them happen to be doctors. Yeah. Just because someone went to medical school, doesn't mean they're not crazy. No, I, oh, I, I'd listen to that Dr. Death podcast. Do you ever hear that? No. It's about a guy who was like, he was a neurosurgeon if he was just like a stupid person that was just like slashing in people's bodies, like it wasn't clear what he was doing, but it looked like when he would open someone up, he had no idea what he was doing. I mean, he just was like stapling a artery to a bone. He's just like it. And- Just for fun? Nobody really knows. He was a real surgeon. He was a real neurosurgeon. And until I heard that podcast, it would have never occurred to me to go to a surgeon and then look him up. I'm sure you are savvy enough to do that. I would have just been like, you're a doctor. You must know things. Okay, open up my brainstem and get in there. Yeah, the first time I got surgery, I had no idea anything about the doctors credentials and I don't know anything about them now. Yeah. Don't you remember his name? He put me under and opened me up and drilled holes in my bones. [46:06] Yeah, now I heard that I would always Google. I would go to be a man. You can't fucking entirely sure that someone's not out of their mind. Well, there's certain professions like that where you assume their degree is the thing that makes them competent, but you forget that it's just a person. Here's the guy that says, of the 37 patients, dunched, how do you say it? Dunched? Oh, dunched, yeah, David dunched. Dunched, operated on and down, so over about two years, 33 were hurt or harmed in the process. 33? 33 had a 37. That is a bad, four-packel-skated clean. Some Some people woke up paralyzed. Others emerged from anesthesia to permanent pain and nerve damage, from nerve damage. Two patients died, one from significant blood loss after the operation, and the other from a stroke caused by a cut verbal artery. Wow. Yeah, he was just slashing. He was in there just like mashing it up, kind of like preschool stuff. [47:02] Look at this one. One patient, a childhood friend, have d Dunst, went in for a spinal operation with someone he trusted and woke up a quadriplegic after Dr. Damage's vertebral artery. Whew. That was his like that childhood best friend. Oh my God. Turn him into a quadriplegic. Jesus Christ. Yeah, there's psychos out there, man. Is that him? That's the guy that plays him in the TV show. Yeah. That's Josh Jackson from... Let's get a real photo of this one here. There was another doctor death. There was a guy who created execution machines. There was a documentary about him. It's a crazy documentary because at the end he kind of gets hoodwinked into becoming a hall costanier. Oh, I know about this guy. Yeah. I get tabs on all of them. Yeah, he would, I think he's gone now. But I think at the end of his life, like he was somehow or another brought to Auschwitz or one of the other concentrators came out. [48:03] I remember this guy, yes. And he said that this could not have been... Impossible that Zechlombi could have... Yeah, I saw this documentary. Yeah. Oh, it was Aero Morris film. Yeah, I remember this guy. So what was his assertion? He claims he was invited to other American prisons, suspected design modifications to electric chairs, possessed no relevant formal training or education and claims that he was told that those who did possess such qualifications would not provide advice due to their opinions on death penalty fear of reprisals or that they were squeamish about the subject. So he was what was he? What was his background? So he was, what was he? What was his background? Just could let it here. So his career continued with other state prisons seeking his advice on execution facilities other than electrocution, such as gas chambers, hanging and lethal injection. How do you say his name? Luchster? [49:00] Luchster? Initially professed his ignorance of other methods of execution. The authorities seeking his advice reminded him that others with more qualifications refused to help. Luchter claims to have taught himself on these other methods of execution and provided advice that was used by the authorities to improve safety and efficiency. So his fall claimed when Luchter claimed to have been sought as a witness for the defense for Ernest Zundel during one of the Nazis, right, in Canada for spreading false news by publics against sending material denying Holocaust overseas. Luchter was asked by the defense to travel the Poland division out so that no, maybe that wasn't a Nazi. Maybe he's like a Holocaust denier. Ernst Zundel. So what is the trial? Spreading false news. So he's just been accused of spreading false news by publishing and sending material denying the Holocaust. So he's being tried for that. And Luister was asked by the defense to travel the Poland, to visit Auschwitz to investigate whether there had been operating gas chambers for executions at the camp. [50:06] So at first examination, Luchter felt that using poison gas in a building with the internal and external design of the buildings currently on display at the site would have caused the death of everyone in the area outside the buildings as well as inside. The film shows video tape footage taken in Poland of Luchter taking samples of bricks in the buildings to take back the United States forensic science labs to determine whether there was evidence of poising gas in the material. These samples were not identified as to where they came from. Luchter states that the laboratories reported that there was not any trace of any poising gas at any time. Right, I remember that. Yeah. After its conclusions were disproven and negativity, publicity ensued, Luchter lost his work as a consultant to American prisons. So his conclusions were disproven so they must have found gas. Look, there's a lot of evidence that those were gas chambers. [51:01] Yeah, that's a crazy thing. I think I remember that this documentary because he starts saying these things, he starts, it's very similar to like social media, clout. He starts saying these things and everybody starts to, in the Holocaust denial community, starts like, bigging them up and going like, this is our guy and he gets more ideological as a result of it. Yeah, and this is the, see, he didn't know what the fuck he was talking about. This is what this is one of the answers It says it's all a question of concentration once the gas is is released into the atmosphere It's concentration decreases and is no longer dangerous also HC and dissipates quickly the execution gas chambers in US prisons We're also ventilated directly into the atmosphere so so it just dissipates further more the argument Would hold for the extermination, the argument would hold for the extermination chambers. It would hold for the delousing chambers as well. And one would have to conclude that no delousing chambers existed either. So it's just he doesn't understand how it dissipates. So there's probably no trace because there's no trace left Yeah, it's we're talking about he's doing this 70 years later. I mean, that's it [52:09] I think that's what the I think that's what the documentary was about was that this guy got quickly got in over his head The minute he said one thing they were all like we love you and he became this kind of figure head of Movement yeah exactly yeah people saying that they know stuff Which is sort of the disease of our time. So that's the other doctor death. They can have a duel of douchebags. I think the guy with the surgeon is going to win. He seems more evil. The other guy seems to like ego got a hold of him or just stupidity. The arrow morose guy. Yeah, I mean, it is a wild thing out there to think of going under the knife and then waking up and realizing that you heard about this. There was a lab, I believe, I can't remember which hospital where the women were going in for fertility treatment. And they were not being given oxy-contin, they were being given saline. And they would be under general. They would be under general anesthesia so they couldn't stop it. [53:02] So they were doing basically surgery, but you were paralyzed. Because you're under general anesthetic. So you feel the pain. So you feel the pain the entire time. And they found out why. It's because there was a drug addict who was in charge of dispensing the oxycon, who was just taking it and been like, best mine. Or it was fentanyl. It was fentanyl. Oh my god, and she was just like dripping the fentanyl into her bag and taking it home. Oh my god. Yeah Wow Oh my god Cheese that's a rough. That's a rough one and then they would come up and they would say fucking evil people in this world They would say oh I felt so much pain and they would go no no you're fine It's like no no. I think I just went under general surgery with absolutely no pain killer at all but I was paralyzed. Oh my gosh. Imagine that. Imagine that well imagine when they used to do it when you weren't paralyzed. Oh they put a piece of leather in your mouth and just take your lay-among. Yeah. Yeah. Dancing with wolf style. They would give you [54:02] Ethel alcohol right? They would give you booze they'd give you whatever the fuck they could give you Ethel Ethel alcohol, right? They would give you booze, they'd give you whatever the fuck they could give you. Yeah. That's not gonna help. What do you think the garlic in the vampire connection is? Garlic and vampires? Yeah, I don't know. I don't know when it comes from. Yeah. I'm not sure. Isn't garlic a very potent anti-bacterial? Like, don't they say to take garlic if you have stomach flus? I think that's one of those homeopathic solutions That people say take garlic if you're sick, but why vampires? Maybe vampires are connected to the the idea of what a vampire is is not knowing What happens to people when they get sick? Not knowing what happens to people when they get a plague blaming it on someone else blaming it on someone evil what happens to people when they get a plague, blaming it on someone else, blaming it on someone evil, blaming it on a curse, you know, blaming it on someone who came back from the dead, and why does someone have anemia? Why is someone losing all their blood? You could blame that on a vampire. Yeah, I guess if you were extremely ill, it would seem like, but you're still walking through the world, [55:02] it would seem like you had been possessed on some level. Well, I've said that about people that get addicted to drugs. I've met people and they weren't addicted to drugs and they got addicted to drugs. It's like, oh my god, that person got bit by a vampire. Totally. Yeah, I think about that a lot, not the vampire thing, but about people who, and I was on that road, by the way. That was going to be my life. But people who decided to get high instead of do anything else. Like it's like, my life will just be getting high and that'll be it. Yeah, and while there's certain ones, the ones that get physically addictive, they're terrifying. Yeah. The oxys, the cocaine, like that kind of shit, where you're physically drawn to it, you need it to get well. The heroin people that need it, they're sick and they need it to get well, that is wild stuff. Meth does this even scarier thing, which is that it lowers your brain's ability to create its own...what's the word for it? Serotonin. Serotonin. Meth becomes this sort of cyclical trap where you can't actually...it's not just that [56:00] you want to get high, your brain can't make you happy without it. And it takes like a long time to rewire your brain in that particular way. Wow. Heroin's the one that everybody overdoses from. And meth is the one that people kind of go mad from slowly because their brains get weirdly atrophied in that way. One of my friends from the pool hall was a crack addict and he would go get crack and then he would have to come down by drinking 40 ounces Okay, he would get so fucked up I would he was always trying to I took him a couple times to like bad neighborhoods so he could cop But then we'd always have to go to a liquor store and he would get like a 40 ounce of what? Old English. Oh, I think that you were 40 guy. No, I drank them. I'm it's their fucking crazy strong Like if you want to make sure the people never have any ambition and don't leave Which is probably what they do Exactly what I would do if I was evil. I used to my the way I would choose what alcohol I would drink is like if a gangster rapper wrapped about it. I would drink it [57:02] So gin and juice old English, St. I's, that was my drink of choice. St. I, Mickey's was for white boys. I didn't mess with that. St. I's for the real brothers in the room. And Carlo Rossi, because E40 had a song called Top of the Line Wine, Carlos Rossi. And then that was, and then Mad Dog 2020 and Cisco. Those were the things that I drank. Mad Dog 2020 is always a popular one. Sure. Yeah. For the youth of tomorrow. Yeah, those there fucking strong man. And Johnny used to drink them, he used to down them when he was like, his eyes was all wild, he would be sweating. You know, but he was also a genius. He was a guy that could do complex math in his head. Well, you could you could say to him, you know, like just throw a bunch of numbers four you could have a calculator there 400 divided by six minus 10 Plus 500 You know mine you could keep going. Yeah, and it would go four six two crazy. It was weird And it goes after that. Yep. That's why genius pool player too like one of the best pool players I've ever seen in my life [58:01] Like professional level pool player. I'd like to spend my, I feel like I spent my youth with people like that. Like I got sober at 15. Wow. I've been sober since I was 15. Wow. I went to rehab for the first time when I was 13. Holy shit. And then, and then got, finally got sober at 15. In a young people's meeting, asking for help, and everybody in the room was 10 years, five to 10 years older than me, in a young people's meeting. And that was like the beginning of my kind of life. Holy shit. Were you a latch key kid? Oh yeah, definitely. So you just got let out and you were just out on the streets, listen to rap, drinking 40s. I was a latch key kid and my mother, Oakland Public Schools, my mom was deaf, my parent, my dad was deaf too, and he was like a sort of born again, Hasidic Jew, like when my parents split, my dad got super, super religious. We come from crazy, I mean like a hardcore version of, it's not like what you, it's like, [59:00] you see unorthodox? No. It's a show on Netflix, It's about a really hardcore sect. That's the sect in my family. Is it a documentary series? No, it's a show. Oh, it's just a scripted show about the sect of Hasidic Judaism called the Satmar. So that's the world that my family was from. My stepmother was Satmar and my family came from a town called New Square, New York, do you know anything about that? No. New Square is really interesting. It's like a village up above Muncie, which is already an unbelievably ultra orthodox place. But Muncie is nothing compared to Square. Square is like the, women don't drive in New Square New York. Whoa. This is New York City. I got cousins that have Eastern European accents and they are third generation American. Which boroughs is? Well, my family lived, months he's in upstate New York and my family lived in Brooklyn in Seagate. Do you know where Seagate is? It's like Cascone Island at the tip of Brooklyn. And that was a sophomore neighborhood. And kids in that neighborhood, we should play dodgeball games where it would be the ultra orthodox kids versus the actually religious kids. [1:00:00] Like that's how intense things were. Like a notes or orthodox person that you looked at and went, wow, that's a real Jew right there. We were basically the Gentiles of the community. Holy shit. It was crazy. And I would be nine months a year in Oakland, regular public school, listening to two short fly back to my dad's house, get driven to the orthodox barber shop. They put a Yamac on me, slacks, and I would go cosplay as an extra from Fiddler on the roof for six weeks a year. So that was the pre, but before rehab and that's sort of, I think that's the reason I fell into the rehab so heavily, into the drug so heavily is because I was everything about me made me feel like I am, I don't fit. I don't fit. I'm a hearing person in a deaf world. I'm essentially a Gentile in a Jewish world. You know, he's so crazy that you were considered a Gentile. I mean, they didn't really consider me but you were not as religious as a family. Effectively, my stuff is wrong with you. Dude, there was a, there was a, there was a local rabbi when I was getting close to my bar mitzvah and he goes, he noticed, he was very nice and he noticed that I, I didn't know Hebrew. These kids spoke, and I'm not kidding, these kids spoke Yiddish as a first language. That's why they had the Eastern European accent, right? [1:01:07] So my uncle, he was first generation American. So he sounds like an American because the first generation American say, go fit in, right? But then by the time he had kids, they're like feeling their comfort in the United States. And they go, don't go fit in, go to a seminary where we learn Yiddish. So my cousins sound like the actress from Dr. Javago and my uncle sounds like a New Yorker Like it's that weird. So they speak Yiddish as a first language I would bring an English prayer book to school and Kids would people be like staring like it was a scarlet letter like there's something wrong with me because I had an English So it's getting towards my bar mitzvah, right? It's my 12th year or the 11th year, and I don't know the alphabet. And this rabbi sees that I'm struggling. And my dad was deaf, and so he had this kind of like bizarre relationship with the community where he was like one part accepted, one part almost mascot in a way that was a little insulting, but he was loved, whatever. [1:02:01] The rabbi said, give him to me, and I'll teach him Hebrew, right? This is like the 90s, early, or late 80s, early 90s. You could at that time ask for some alone time with the child and they'll be handed over. No questions asked, right? So I go to his house and he starts teaching me the Hebrew, the alphabet, basic, elemental. I mean, like this is like a Talmudic scholar teaching me the ABCs, right? And I am struggling. I like can't get it and he goes don't worry don't worry. He goes don't don't don't be in bed. It's hold on. Shmouli Shmouli come come come and his son comes into the room and he goes do the English alphabet. This is an American kid. He goes do the English alphabet and the kid goes oh no a b g and then he slaps me, the ride by slaps me on the back. He goes, see, he's stupid in English. You are stupid in Hebrew. Everybody's stupid. That was the energy. What a sweetheart, right? That's a good way to approach it. Yeah, he was like, he was willing to humiliate his eldest son to teach me to love learning. That is funny though, the kid doesn't know the English alphabet. It was, I'm sure eventually he got it, but this was, maybe not. [1:03:05] Maybe not, I mean, there's just communities in this country that exist generation after generation where they only speak one language. No, it's like they made Wakanda in Brooklyn. That was like the vibe, you know, and I was in multiple Wakandas too. I was born into like the Def Wakanda, where imagine that, you're being born the enemy, but I was a, I'm a member of the deaf community. I don't know, I think every deaf person would say that, that I, I'd be like, belong, but I also was the enemy. I was the hearing. And, and so you're, why do they think of the hearing as the enemy? Well, that is a complicated question. And it's because there has been a lot of enforced oppression on the deaf community from the, from the outside. The story of sign language is really fascinating. 300 years ago, there was no sign language. There was only the kind of sign if you were born, 90% of deaf people are born into a hearing family, right? That's just the way genetics works. Like most of the time, you don't have deaf family members. And if you were born 350 years ago into one of those families, [1:04:04] you just didn't have language. You weren't given the gift of language, which is the thing, I mean, think about how much language plays into your own life, too. Like speaking and think everything you know, every thought process you have is, is mashed through the filter of language. And in that situation, you'd be born into a family and you had zero language. You would have like a gesturing system that you'd created with your dad to be able to say like pass the potatoes and that was it. So you could say I feel, you couldn't say what you wanted to do. You couldn't even think about how you, I mean you could think, I don't know, I mean I wasn't, I've never experienced that. But language is the thing that unlocks reason. It's the thing that unlocks culture and people were stymied from that. But if you were born lucky enough to have genetic deafness in your family, so that you and your sibling were both deaf, then the two of you sitting together could create language, a language of two, right? You would back and forth between two siblings create [1:05:01] a family sign system that would enable the both of you learning from one another to create a language, and enable you to reason and think, and talk about how you feel, even if it was just one person. Communicate with the outside world. But at least you could communicate with yourself, and with one other person. I mean, the difference between an isolated deaf person and a pair of siblings is the world. It's freedom, it's everything. So one day, a French priest walks along and sees two deaf sisters signing back and forth to one another and he goes, that's language. Prior to that, deaf people weren't even considered to be linguistic. They weren't even considered to be capable of reason, but he goes, no, I know what that is. I'm looking at language. So he goes to these sisters. His name is the obeyed to epay and he says, teach me to sign. Somehow he tells them, like, you know, teach me these gestures to them, teach me to sign. They teach him to sign. And his thing was he wanted them to take the catechism, right? That he wanted them to be able to go to heaven. He realized, oh, deaf people have are linguistically capable, but they can't get into heaven unless they can take the catechism and confess their faith and take communion, right? Which right makes sense if there is a god that God wouldn't allow them into heaven based on the fact that they [1:06:11] He's like my hands are tied here, but so you have to say it so they teach him they teach him and he teaches them back French and then he starts to gather the deaf people from around the world I'm sorry from around France and he creates the first school for the death. He teaches them French in sign. In sign, that's right. Whoa. Because French, because sign language and spoken language are not the same. A lot of people think that, right? That like I speak American sign language, but people think, oh, it's a translation of English. It's not. It's this complete own language, right? So, oh, I did not know that. So much so, the way that he would fundraise for this school is he would do like a traveling like roadshow where he would take his, his star pupils around France and around Europe and they would be at an exhibition hall and a person in the audience would ask a question. He would say, oh, Joe, do you have a question for the deaf person and then you'd ask them on some French question, like, you know, what degree of suffering can be born by man or how many creams is too many creams for a [1:07:08] tree or whatever. And he would take your question, sign it to his star pupils and they would take a piece of chalk, walk up to the blackboard and write the answer in perfect French and people lost their fucking minds. Like they couldn't believe it. Like deaf people, oh my god, unlocked this whole conception of the deaf as like, they can think, they can reason, oh, they, all they need is language to be free. Right. So all this whole network of deaf schools for the deaf started to spring up. They would, they sprung up in all over Europe and they would copy the, the teaching methods of the, the school for the deaf. And, and, and a guy from America came over, right? And he saw this system and he basically took their star pupil. And one of the things was the deaf would teach each other. So you would teach them sign and then they would become educated and then they would become a professor at this school. And he took like the star professor Laurent Clerk was his name. Thomas [1:08:02] Gallaudet was the name of the American. He came over and he saw Laurent Clerk and he said, move to America with me and let's go do that. Let's go replicate this in America. So Thomas Gallaudet says, yes, they get on a boat. They sail to America. By the time they landed, Thomas Gallaudet knew rudimentary sign and Laurent Clerk, who was like a fucking genius, knew basically had been taught English. And they set up the first school for the deaf in America. He figured out English on a boat? He was a genius, like a real genius, like a like an actual like lucky enough to have been, you know, these circumstances in history were like the perfect man at the perfect time. Yes. They come here, they set up the school here and they start to create American Sign Language and they they borrowed from these different worlds, right? They took French Sign Language as the base. Martha's Vineyard, back then, had this weird genetic anomaly on the island of Martha's Vineyard. This is like before, it was just a place for Kennedy's to fuck their mistresses. This was like back when it was a fishing island. There was some weird genetic thing that had happened where over the course of hundreds of years, one in 25 people on Martha's Vineyard was deaf. And it was this very bizarre kind of like, [1:09:06] like almost the equality that deaf people on Martha's Vineyard felt was almost like the opposite of what affirmative action is attempting to do. Affirmative action wants to correct a historic harm by changing the playing field. This was an equity of everybody was the same, because everybody on Martha's Vineyard knew either was deaf, knew a deaf person or was related to a deaf person. So everybody hearing and non-hearing signed on Martha's Vineyard. It was a sign system called Martha's Vineyard Sign Language. They took some of that. They took the Plains Indian Sign Language, PISL, it's called. You know that like gesture, you've seen it in like movies where the Native Americans will gesture to each other and you think they present it as if it's like a war language so they don't have to make noise. But what it actually was was all the tribes in America spoke different languages. So they created this kind of Esperanto of the tribes so that they could [1:10:01] trade. They could do trade and that was called Plains Indian Sign Language. And they took all that into a kind of bullia base of French Sign Language base, Martha's Vineyard Chaser, and Plains Indian sprinkled on top, and they created American Sign Language. And then 100 years, 200 years later, my mother was born deaf in Oakland, California, and she went to the California School for the Deaf, and she absorbed this language. My mother was 13 when she went to the California School for the Deaf and she absorbed this language. My mother was 13 when she went to the California School for the Deaf. She was in another, an oral school system. This is my long-winded way of telling you why Deaf people have such a problem with hearing people. That language that she learned, she was in an oral school system. So almost as soon as the sign language system came out, hearing people looked at it and go, we got to get rid of that. The one thing that unlocked their freedom, the one thing that unlocked their minds, hearing people saw it and said, we have to take that away from them. We have to make them more like us. By doing the sign, they're creating more Wakanda. They're creating an insular, sort of closed circuit system of culture, right? And there, and weirdly, this was at a time in American history [1:11:08] where those closed circuits of culture were really frowned upon. This is like- We're frowning upon deaf people signing to each other. It's deaf people signing to each other. Italians having their own newspapers, Chinese immigrants, like at that time in American history, the idea of creating like an immigrant subculture was really frowned upon. Alexander Graham Bell, whose parents were deaf like me, had a deaf wife, he became the champion of what was called the oral system. And the oral system was, let's not allow them to sign, let's teach them to speak, let's make them like us. Let's make them talk normally and function normally, let's make them like us, let's make them talk normally and function normally, let's make them like us. But it was a crazy failure and it makes sense why, right? They can't hear the sounds. Alvar Sacks said teaching a deaf person without sign is like teaching you Japanese from inside of a soundproof booth by holding up flashcards in Japanese [1:12:03] and like putting a symbol next to it. It was kind of doomed to failure. And then they went through this 200-year, reimposed darkness. There was a trial where all the hearing educators decided that deaf people wouldn't sign anymore. They fired all the deaf educators and they pushed them out and they created this oral system which really, I mean, it worked for some people. Some people, but what it created was you had to be exceptional in order to be average in the deaf world. You know, you had to be a genius in order to get that oral system to work for you because your natural mode of communication had been kind of stamped out. And then in about the 70s, deaf people started to like kind of rise up and say, fuck that. We're signing. This is who we are. This is our native language. And when I was born in 79, that was the, that was the world I was born into. And, and so from that, two sisters on a fucking corner in, in a slum in Paris to that school to Galle de Tte, [1:13:00] to a boat ride to the Martha's Vineyard, to the California School, for the deaf, to my mother's hands, to my hands, that was the way that I acquired language, through this crazy historical journey. And that, to me, is the reason that when I was born into the deaf community, there was so much distrust of the hearing world because they were like, they stole from us the one thing that gave us freedom. That makes sense. Wow, I did not know any of that stuff. That's incredible. What, how does someone get to be a fake sign language you turn to and be on stage with Obama? Was it Obama? Oh, it's been multiple people. I just want, there was one recently that happened. Yeah, but the Obama one was bananas because this guy was totally insane and he was standing in front of Obama just making things up I'll tell you how good he I want to see can I see it the Obama guy how bad the Obama guy is well I think it's just gibberish dude. He's just the sign language version of gibberish. I My life was going to appointments with my mother and [1:14:06] to appointments with my mother and being tasked with the job of interpreting for my mom's medical appointments for my mom. It was like a non-consensual internship program. Like, I, like, her medical appointments, and then I started to get in trouble. And then the, the, the subject of the meeting would be me. It would be like a disciplinary meeting about me. You would have to explain what your mom was having a problem with with you or what the school system or what the Oakland Police Department what their problem with me was oh my god and then you have to do this kind of like This kind of interpretive dance where you're you're not you can't be like oh we think your son is awesome He's a cool kid. We love him because then your mom my mom's not stupid should be like all right Let's see how bad this guy Okay, well, that's not Obama No, that's not Obama. No, that's not the one. This is the guy. I remember that I mean guys just if this was in at the Nelson Mandela Memorial. Yeah, so check this dude up. This video doesn't have him net with Obama. Okay, just show him by himself with that other gentleman. So what what is he doing here? [1:15:02] Moshe. I am at a disadvantage, Joe, because I, this is South Africa. And I do not speak South African Sign Language. Oh, I remember this guy. It is a South African Sign Language. I would assume every system, you want to hear something crazy. It is so not a translation of English that my mother would have a much harder time understanding a British signer than a French signer. So it has nothing, it's divorced from English. Wow, I love this lady. Okay, so I can tell you that this woman is actually using sign language. This is actual sign language, but she is very bad at sign language. Is that what it is? Yes, those are real letters. And this is completely incomprehensible. 55 million is what she just said. I don't know what that is. Please, announcement tonight handcuffs. She waved her arms around like she was singing in jingle bells, but that's not true, right? [1:16:01] She's doing some sign language. Well, she's a hustler, Whatever this is. But I did, dude, I've been to so many appointments with my mother with my mother where I walk in and and it's an emergency room appointment. And I go, you can leave. Just leave because you aren't qualified to do this. And this is fucking life or death for my mother. And you're here. You shouldn't have taken this fucking job. You should have known better than to take this job because this is an emergency room situation. So that's when I was an interpreter, the responsibility of that was like massive to me. I felt that so acutely because I'd lived through it in such a direct way. I've been an interpreter when people were told they were dying. I've been an interpreter when people were graduated from graduate school, from like getting their doctorate, although I've been an interpreter where people were in court, and it was literally the degree to which I could sign accurately and faithfully was a difference between them going to prison and not going to prison. Like, I've done all of that and that that weight is like super massive to me. And super important. [1:17:02] I don't even imagine. Yeah. And some funny shit has happened along the way too. I'm sure. Like some very strange situations. How does the deaf community feel about people who get like implants and can hear again? So that's another complicated question. I think have you ever seen the sound in the fury? No. It's a fucking beautiful and fantastic documentary about cochlear implants and the deaf community. I mean, the thing is, the deaf community had an, and I don't speak for the deaf community, obviously, but I can speak for my own experience. My mother has a cochlear implant. She got one, because my mom was like, my mom's like an iconoclass and she's like, I'm not gonna allow a taboo in deaf society to keep me from experiencing as much of life as I could possibly experience. Of course. But in general, especially at the beginning, deaf people hated the idea of a cochlear implant because they do not feel, and I think to some degree I agree with them, that deafness is a disability. They feel that what it is, it's a culture. [1:18:01] I mean, obviously they can't hear. That's a disability. But the true disability comes from the fact that communication barrier. And so to them, they see the cochlear implant as just another imperialist, now a robotic mechanism to make them hearing again. But wouldn't that be counterbalanced by the ability to absorb art? In computer music? In computer music? Yeah. But how do they hear it? Do they hear it the way a normal person hears it? Well, I can tell you in section two of the book, My Rave Years, what kind of music the death like more than any other in my experience is definitely slamming techno because it's a really simple form to be able to experience and feel is just that boom, boom, boom of techno or house. They love, they love that. One of the best pool players in the world is deaf. And he shuts me. Is that right? Is that right? Is that right? Is that right? Is that right? Is that right? Is that right? Is that right? Is that right? Is that right? [1:19:00] Is that right? Is that right? Is that right? There, my mother is still deaf. If you met her, you would be like, there would be no part of you that was like this person is in deaf. She sounds deaf and she signs. But she wanted, yeah, to experience, but she can hear. So when you're old and your brain has set its neural pathways to such a degree that it does not process sound it never has, the cochlear implant apparently, there's no way to reignite an atrophied pathway into a normal hearing system. By the way, the cochlear implant, I don't know I've never had one obviously, it sounds robotic. It never sounds like, which is why they're like techno. Exactly right. It's simple to, you know why they like techno. That's exactly right. It's simple to, you know, it's not like listening to country roads. Oh, I thought you meant because it connects, it's like a robot music. It's easy to follow. But I don't even mean people with cocoa implants. Deaf people in general, they love raves because it's easy to follow, you can dance to it. You don't have to follow some symphonic kind of like path or whatever. When they're totally deaf, do they feel techno? [1:20:06] Definitely. Yeah. So where do they feel it? Their feet? I would say probably their genitals mostly. Really? No, I don't know their whole body. I mean, you've been to a rave, haven't you? No. You never have? No. One of your genitals really do feel true. So you'd be just kind of barely moving. I was a big rave and I became eventually like a rave promoter and a DJ. I was a DJ at raves through the 90s and an ecstasy dealer but that's another story. I started when I was about 16, I bought my first set of turntables and a mixer and I was terrible obviously like everybody starting out but you can't play in your headphones. DJing really, you have to like have it be amplified, and I had a very lucky break in having deaf parents, because I would just set everything all the way to the max and my mom would be like happily studying in the other room and I would just be like train wrecking techno, because that's hilarious. How'd your neighbors feel about that? [1:21:00] I didn't have neighbors. I lived next door to a um to a terrible bar so I could have given a fuck. Oh, that's like I grew up next to like a real white trash kind of like want to be gangster bar That was oh yeah, really rough. They'd be like showing off their like sound system and they're like cutless supreme Oh, that was the energy pissing off my front door and shit like that. Oh my god Wow, is this a death rave? I'm telling you, I'm not making this up. I don't think that's real music. Yeah, that's this company group called deaf rave. They hold post raves for deaf people. Well, that's what I'm saying. House music and techno music really is actually music that's made for your body rather than your mind, you know, and it's made to move to. And so I think for the deaf community, this is like, it is the perfect form. And these guys are all deaf, that's so cool. You definitely feel the bass for sure. I mean, I don't, they out, yeah, there's headphones you can get that transduce sound through [1:22:00] your jaw instead of going through your ear. Whoa. And I, but they have to still be able to understand what that is really fast. That's really fast. And the frequencies are... Speaking of weird surgeries, when my grandma, rather when my mom got the cochlear implant, it decimated her balance. She has not been the same since. She's super wobbly because they took out her inner ear and they put it in a robotic cochlea instead. And her inner inner ear and she wanted to get the other one done and we had to do like a cochlear implant intervention We go mom no you're gonna be in a wheelchair if you do that like don't do that just Rex your equilibrium Wrecked hers a lot of people with cochlear implants are doing fine But she for some reason you know, I wish I mean I love my mom and I who am I to say that it wasn't worth it? She says it's worth it to her and it's not my business. She wanted to experience in the last court of her life, like the sensation of sound and I think like, I get that when you've never experienced something like why you wouldn't walk through that door. But to me, I wish she'd never gotten it because now she's like this wobbly, older lady and it like scares the shit out of me. Is there a way to correct it? No. No. They take it out. [1:23:06] I mean, once they do it, that's it. They literally remove your cochlea and put a robot cochlea in instead. So there's no, no, it's irreversible. She can't do an MRI either. Oh boy. That sucks. She can't do a lot of things because it's like a piece of machinery will clunk out of her brain. Rip out of her fucking head, right? But yeah, I think that the deaf community is. Her link, bro. I wonder how that would work with deaf people. I'm sure, you know, with, oh, the new product is called telepathy. Let a person control a phone or computer just by thinking. Well, I heard about, say, what if you think in ASL, then, you know, you're not thinking in English. I thought the first ones were going to be for people that were injured. Oh to get them out of like the paralysis of something. But I guess that is someone, but if you were injured in like Stephen Hawking's. Right. You know that would have been perfect for him. Right. But what would it do? You would be able to do everything on a computer especially. Oh it would no longer be robot voice. [1:24:01] Right. You could type. You could do everything. Right. You could, it says that you could talk faster. He said that you could talk faster than an auctioneer. With Nurling. Yeah, with Nurling. That's interesting. Yeah. How fast can you say get me to Epstein's Island? No! Quickly. Yeah. Yeah. It took him one minute to write each word. Is that true? Yeah. And there was allegations towards the end of his life. He married his nurse. His story is crazy because I have a bit on him and I've been researching him over the last few weeks. His story is nuts. He was most people that have that disease, Lou Gehrer's disease, they die within two years. He lived like 55 years. And by the end of his life, all he could do is move his cheek muscles. That was all that moved. So he can move his cheek muscles and he would use the cheek muscle control cursor and would select letters on a screen. Is there any reason why he survived or is it just full on luck of the draw? Probably [1:25:02] luck of the draw. I mean, access to great medicine. I mean, he's right where there's that. I kind of feel like some scientists, there's some part of me that believes like until the Epstein story broke, that it was like a gift from the universe or something. But the thing about the Epstein I don't think is there were a lot of scientists that got lured onto that island. And imagine if you're a scientist, let's say you're a physicist and someone contacts you, contacts you into his Mosha. Would you like to go meet this guy, that guy, and that guy, and I'm gonna retreat. You know, like, oh, these guys are super legit. This must be a legit. Right. You know, you're over there studying the cosmos. How much time are you googling Jeffrey Epstein? That's why I always had these things. And in the beginning, no one really had reason to believe that he was doing anything wrong, until he got arrested. That's why I always hate these things where they go, you took a picture with so and so, therefore you're, it's like, what is that? I don't, you take a picture with 1,000 people a day, like what is, I have no, I'm not Googling everybody I do a picture with. Right, especially if you just meet someone in a these scientists, like that's a really sneaky trick [1:26:06] to get a bunch of prominent people together and then invite you to be with those prominent people. It's a good intelligence operation move. I mean, if I was an intelligence operative, that's how I would compromise people. Oh, you think there's a party that thinks maybe they were lured there not just to put it in the person. But in order to to take them down 100% not to take them down to have their influence I see to triangulate them into yeah, you can you'll do what I want you to do kind of a thing Yes, yes, you you will support Israel no matter why you will do this you will do that you will you know See I will tell you to do something you do it You know if you're a person that has an enormous amount of influence in a field of science, that's a very valuable person to have on your hand if you ever have something where someone has to speak to the general public. Right. You get this expert, this expert has an opinion that's very different than some other people's [1:27:01] opinions and they say, well, then they promote that opinion. Right. This is the person. You could do a lot of things, especially if you have a lot of them. Right, right. So an island's an island's worth? Yeah, and then you also keep them from criticizing you. You keep them from talking about it. You know, you essentially muzzle them to this very complex sort of scheme that was running where they were compromising all of these people. That's what you think Epstein's islands was 100% It wasn't like a plague he'd anistic playground. It was actually like a Intelligence agency agent most likely most likely well Galein Maxwell her father was an intelligence operative You know and he was the one who apparently trained Epstein supposedly, you know The whole thing is very convoluted because it's very difficult. The stories filled with very wealthy, powerful people who have done a fantastic job of keeping themselves from getting arrested. It's pretty wild, like how this has been out in the open, just the murder of Epstein, which seems to be a murder, doesn't seem to be hanging. [1:28:01] You ever got upset you weren't invited? No, pretty happy. Is. You might have gone. I would have gone if I didn't have. Yeah. Especially. If you get an email, dude, we got an island. It's really fun. You actually pre-Google? Oh, yeah. Pre-Google. You're like, hey, do you want to go out with, hang out with Stephen Hawking's on an island? that I don't know like the universe gave him to us in this weird way. Like, here's this mega brilliant genius. I'm not like a big deist in that way. But I think what are the odds that the smartest man ever to get Lou Gehrig's got to live long enough to give over the full bulk of his genius? There's something very beautiful and interesting about that to me. Well, yeah, that's a good point. That that guy who had so much to give lived so long with a disease that kills so quickly. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, he was apparently he was paralyzed. He couldn't move, but he could feel. So that's why he liked girls. Yeah. And you know, there's a crazy article and I forget what Maggie, Friday maybe, there were, no, I forget the, I forget the magazine, but they were talking [1:29:03] about he was like a frequent visitor to strip clubs Right, you go to like swingers places. Imagine being the stripper. Yeah Hawking comes in You probably know he is you know That's not possibly stuck up old guy If you're 22 years old and your stage name is Lexus what are the odds? Do you know who Stephen Hawking is? You know? I mean, it's pretty famous, pretty famous, guys. Pretty famous for people that care about those things. Yeah, I think Lexus cared. Maybe. I think you're good. Perhaps. Cut Lexus some slime. Maybe Lexus is just, you know, the answer to keep things cool. That's right. There's those, that's real. I think the the Hawking thing is a strange story, but it's the whole island thing is a strange story. It's a strange story. It's a story that is one of those things where you go and like, this sounds like the plot of a movie. How could this really be how they did it? You know? Yeah. Yeah. That movie will come out. Who plays that thing? [1:30:03] That's a good question. I Got a pick Alex Baldwin. Yeah Baldwin be good. Be good big It's a little stink on right now Well, there's a little stink on that thing too Yeah, but I mean maybe too much for him to get the part sure you would want someone to who would do it? Oh Bradley Cooper he could do it. Oh BC. He's a He's a good guy. Assuming yeah great two great Jewish heroes Yeah, he goes from a nice road Well, he played he's played a lot of people. I'm who else would be good at Christian Bell He could do anything Christian Bell is the best of us. Have you seen poor things? No, I haven't. Emma Stone is the best actor in the world. I'm on record now. Wow. Poor things was great. I loved it. I loved Daniel Day Lewis. Well, DDL is, he is retired. Is he still retired? I think so. I feel like he's about to come out. You think he's about the drop a new mixtape. Just wanted to get back in there. Not that. It's a pay-per-view that I would pay for. [1:31:06] Daniel Day Lewis versus Floyd Mayweather. I bet if you gave Daniel Day Lewis long enough, he'd learn how to, he was really good in a movie called The Boxer. It was about an IRA guy who got out of jail and he looked like a real legitimate boxer. He trained for an entire year in a boxing gym. That's all he did before they filmed. So he went to a boxing gym and he essentially was there every day. You know he had to be called Mr. President on set of Lincoln, including to like a security guard. There was like some older security guard that like just got higher that day. Yeah, he was all in. He was, but those kind of people are so insufferable and then you look at their performance you go I don't know I guess it's worth it like it's yeah, I think it's got to be worth it I would not want to be around him during the there will be blood movie no definitely not Fuck that I just saw it in the name of the father again. Have you seen that? It's one of his earlier movies. It's like an IRA story about yes, I did yes, I did such a good fucking movie He's so good. He's got no duds. Is that true? Oh, I don't know if in duds. Yeah, I guess you're right. I don't think he's got any duds [1:32:08] Oh, that's such a good movie. I love this movie last the mohikens was great too He was great. He's great and everything so I mean decided to start making shoes. Is that true? Yeah, it became a cobbler He went too deep into the phantom thread.. Now he just decided that's what he feels like doing right now. I think it's time for me to reveal something to you, Joe. Official statement. Daniel DeLewis will no longer be working as an actor. He is immensely grateful to all his collaborators and audiences over the many years. This is a private decision and neither he nor his representatives will make any further comment on the subject. Why be so mysterious? And also what is this office building? Is that Photoshopped? I think someone made this account on Instagram and just put this up. D-D-L. I don't imagine that's by him. Mm. Yeah, I would not imagine that he has an Instagram. So yeah, those boots you liked so much, Joe? Ah. Those are D-D-L's. Nice. That's right. [1:33:00] D-D-L. I was gonna get us to this conversation at some point today. That would be a dope brand. Like if Dan and Dave Lewis started like, actually selling things. I would buy Dan and Dave Lewis's shoes. A lot of them for the first time, you'd be the coolest guy in the fucking room. Absolutely. But yeah, Emma Stone import things. She's the new one. Is he still a cobbler? Does he sell shoes? Or does he just make shoes. You want to hear a crazy cobbler port to the conversation we were talking about earlier. 20 years ago, after the boxer, he secretly made shoes. Secretly made shoes. 96 to 97. Okay. My mother learned sign language because of a cobbler. So my grandma had her in an oral school, and she was failing, and she was isolated, and had no friends. And my mother, my grandma went to get her shoes fixed at this cobbler, and he happened to be deaf, randomly. And my grandma was like, you know, talking to passing notes back and forth with him, [1:34:01] and he said that he'd never learned sign language, and that he didn't have any friends language and that he didn't have any friends and that he didn't have any access to the world and he was just like a lonely cobbler. That was the day my grandma pulled her out of a rural school and centered her to the school for the deaf to learn sign language. All because of a cobbler. That's awesome. Yeah. That's a wild one. Do you believe in synchronicities like that these things happen on purpose that there's something some sort of a destiny to life I can tell you that I've been thinking about destiny a lot she was the other stripper of the strip club pushing the Stephen Hawking no I've been thinking about destiny a lot because of this book because you know these are worlds all of these worlds that I write about in this book like deafness and ascetic Judaism and AA and raves and burning Man and stand up there. They don't go together except through like my body, like through me. I'm the connective tissue. And having written this book, like now I guess I'm in middle age or something like that. If I'm lucky. If I'm lucky, yes, amen. May I be so lucky. I'm looking back and going like this whole thing was a path. [1:35:05] And there is no way to see destiny I don't believe in destiny looking forward. I believe in destiny looking back like every where you land Is destiny in this weird way because it never could have been anything else? I have all these and I'm sure you do too these portals in my life You could have been a pool hustler only you could have been and you could have gone to the pool hustler thing and then gotten shot and died at 25 or like, there's all these multiverse possibilities of the Moshe that wasn't and the Moshe that was was always headed in this direction. Like I like, think about standup. The only reason I started standup is because I was in Israel doing a semester abroad and it was in the second int semester abroad and it was in the second in Tafada and it got shut down. I just decided randomly to go to New York and I happened to have a friend who I'd kept in touch with who was doing stand-up and she brought me to a show that night and I saw Patrice and Sarah Silverman and I never even thought stand-up in my life. [1:36:01] I like never, I mean, I've seen like Delirious or I watched Janine's special and it's but I didn't care. Stand up wasn't part of my thing, but I saw them doing their thing and I was like I couldn't believe it. Like I've been writing like long for monologues and like wanting to be an actor. I didn't know what I wanted to do. I wanted to write plays maybe. I wanted to be a historian. I just didn't know and then I saw them how old we I was 21 and I go First of all Patrice was making fun of Michael J Fox and was like the week that his Parkinson's had been and I was like I like couldn't believe it felt Illegal Like this how can this be you know and and then Sarah went on and she was transgressive in this way that was like, anyway, I go, wow, that's crazy. And then the next night my friend was doing a set and I went and saw her and she was funny. I go, what the hell? She's a human being. Like these are gods that I just saw last night, you know? But this is a person. She's like me. So When you come to the bay, I'll write five minutes of material, take me to an open mic. Go to the open mic, I do the open mic, it goes pretty well. [1:37:06] And then I just like my destiny was like set. Like now here I am, it's 20 years later. I just wrote my second book, I'm talking to you. I got a wife at home who's a comic, where I met in comedy clubs. I have a child at home that's a result of the connection that I can't even look back and think about the other lives it could have been because it's like that to me is destiny is looking back and going I was like I don't know how I don't know how raves to burning man to deafness to Hasidic Judaism to A A to stand up led here But it was always leading here. This is where I was going Do you believe in the multiverse do you believe that there's infinite numbers of you Living in different directions and infinite possibilities that have because that's what if the people that believe that we live in one channel of essentially what's an infinite radio dial. Yeah. That's why you can only exist in the moment really. [1:38:02] Because it's only one thing going. Yeah, it's only one thing going and it can go anyway. And if there's an infinite number of you out there, which it likely, the way the universe is, if you talk to people that actually understand the scope of infinity, they will tell you that not only do humans exist, but you exist. And not only do you exist, but you exist in the form where you have done everything that you have done on this earth, you, Moshe of the guy I'm talking to you now, there's an infinite number of you doing the same thing that have done that exactly every pause that you've made. Uh huh. And then there's an infinite number of ones who made different choices. And it's an infinite number of different choices that they have made at every single moment of every single step of their life. That's how big infinity is. What is the... I guess there is no purpose in that. It's like... [1:39:01] I don't know, there still might be a purpose. There's definitely a purpose to the people that it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it a meaning to it. It's what does that do and what are these moments and what is the powerful emotion of love and the way people feel in the hear great music and all the good things that human beings are capable of and all the things that human beings do. What is that doing? It's expressing energy. It's expressing the universe in some weird way, has taken this multi-celled being and allowed it to change the surface of the planet and experiment with video where it flies through space and hits another person's device on the other [1:40:01] side of the planet instantaneously. what we've done is fucking bizarre. And I can't think that there's not a meaning to it, because there's a meaning to us while it's happening. Well, if you believe that story, that I'm not saying that story was the most magical story, it's my magical story, and everybody has their own little version of magical story. Like if you're lucky, it's magical. Right. And that's not to discount people's tragedy that they go through too. And by the way, some of my path was paved with tragedy. And that's, to me, the history of the Jews is like this sort of triumphant story that's like, pockmarked with insane tragedy all the time. And then you just keep going and keep surviving. Like, if you believe in destiny, like I was headed here because of force brought me here, that's magical. And if you believe in randomness, like there was no meaning, there was no, this was truly a pinball ping from wall to wall, that's as just as magical to me. That's pretty mind-blowing magical. Existence is magical. I've always said that if life itself, [1:41:01] as you live it right now, was a psychedelic drug. You would take it and be like, what the fuck is this? Well, even to exist at all, scientifically, is so infinitesimally unlikely. Unlikely. You were the perfect amount of distance from the sun to have an ozone layer and an atmosphere and then you're a human that you got to incarnate in the human version where you're not just like a sustenance like, you know, the pig that you shot, you could have been the pig that you shot. The funky pig, like, that is such a rare, it feels so common if you don't pay attention to the beauty in your life, it can feel so common and banal and life is boring and meaningless. And if you turn around, if I turn around and like look at the kind of magic of this existence and this incarnation, like I, and that's why I love life so much. Like that's to me like the book is about my, my desire to like, I want, when I die, I want to squeeze the last drop of the towel that was life. I want the last little drip of water [1:42:04] that was in there. I want to drink it all. I want to live like my religion is fun. It's not Judaism, it's fun. It's experiences, it's like love and the connection, talking to you going on stage, writing a book, having a family like I feel super overpaid and lucky. And cause a lot of my friends that I grew up with are dead and like I just and I could have been me too Sure Could have been all of us. There's a lot of decisions you could have made that have Not gotten you to this point right now. Yeah me and Piedelms called who we're talking about it. He was calling it spiritual plinco Like it just could have blinked in a different direction and you'd be a different guy You go on a car ride one day, you're in an accident, you go on a car ride the other day, you win the Nobel Prize. So, yeah, you tie your shoes before you leave the house and you avoid an accident. Or you tie your shoes and you get no accident. Yeah. So, I think, yeah, that is, what you're talking about living in the moment, because there's so many possibilities the thing you're, it's the thing with my daughter, [1:43:08] the thing you're protecting or against, you're not protecting against the actual thing that will harm her and vice versa. Well, that's the thing about anxiety, right? It's preparing for something that hasn't happened. Right. That's the, what freaks people out, I think a lot of time it affects very smart people people too because they take into account all the possible scenarios that could take place. All the variables. I always would tell people when I was teaching, when I was teaching martial arts, when I'd have people compete and I'd take them to tournaments, I'd be like, the reason why you're so nervous is because you're smart. The last thing you want to be is not nervous right now because nerves are going to save you. It's a terrible feeling, but you're going to get over it. But those nerves exist because you're aware of the variables. You're aware of the possibilities. You're aware of the danger of it all. A delusional, stupid person who's just confident, they can win. Right. It's possible. They can still win. And they can have no nerves at all. And they can go in there and kick everybody's ass, but you're better off being aware of what this is. You're better. [1:44:06] Your senses will be heightened, as long as you're not overwhelmed by fear. You're saying fear is beneficial in that way. 100%. Yeah. Customado who trained Mike Tyson used to say fear is like a fire. You can cook with it or you can burn your house down. Oh, that's great. You have to be able to control it. Yeah. Yeah. Totally. I mean, the thing that happens is when people become worshipful of their fear and it takes away their ability to go out and experience life. They're so afraid of the disastrous possibilities of life that they forget to live a life. Yes. And I will say I'm not free of fear at all. I feel it all the time. You're a human being. It's impossible to not be. Also you live in LA. And you get a bitch for a dog. It's not. It's possible to bitch. It's also possible to betray me because it's a German Shepherd and it's like I wasn't trained to protect Jews. Oh good point. Okay. I got you. Yes. No, he's a sweetheart. You know, George Foreman had a German Shepherd and when he had a German Shepherd and he brought it to Africa when he's fighting Muhammad Ali. They were very distrustful of him because of the dog because he had a dog that would [1:45:08] they used to sick on black people. Wow. So when he was bringing this dog, this guy was bringing a dog that they recognize as the enemy. There's a lot of people that were very distrustful of him. Oh, that's really interesting. Yeah. I should have brought my dog. So that helped Ali. If he brought my dog it would have created unity and South African. Yeah, he is. They still wouldn't have trusted it. It's the breed. Yeah, yeah. It's things sweet. I love him. They didn't have those breeds back then though. They only had one kind of German Shepherd. Oh, they were in Arle. They were in Arle. They looked like over the years. dropped right and they look different if you go to like a German Shepherd from like 1930 and then look at a German Shepherd from 2023 it's a different animal and he's sloping you know that bulldogs can't true bulldogs like mca or whatever Jamie's dog can't fuck they can't and they can't and they only give birth they only give Sicilian birth yeah I think Jamie's dog can't breed normally you gotta use the turkey [1:46:03] baster but neither can Marshall I haven't tried Marshall can if breed normally. You gotta use the turkey baster. But neither can Marshall. I haven't tried. Marshall can if I let him. Yeah, the problem is you won't let him. Well, he was always gonna want. He texted me on the way here. He said that to talk to Joe, see if I can get some ass. I would definitely find a good lady that would have to have homes for all the puppies. But you know, this is a thing about dogs. Like you're not saying I want my dog to have sex. You're saying I want my dog to procreate. Right, right, right. That's a different thing. Yeah, yeah. But they can't, right, they don't do it for, I think about that a lot too. That human beings, by the way, I think human, this is a great and lucky incarnation to be a human. It's really good. But it's also So humans are, we have warped evolution to such a degree. Like we shouldn't be hung up about stuff. We can't have sex is so simple for every other animal. It's just like I get in there, boom, I got a baby. And we're over here going like I'm ashamed. Covered in clothes, which is just a bizarre invention. Right. What a bizarre thing we've done to our bodies, where we can no longer exist in the atmosphere, even if it's warm people [1:47:06] were close. Look, it's become a thing where you're shielding your genitals from the other people because they represent your sex. Well, also though I have heard that when people, when when uncontacted tribes, really like old school, you know, sustenance living sort of iron age level tribes, come out of isolation and decide to join the world. A big part, what they want is clothes. I think it might be really cold out there, just in life. Oh yeah, with no clothes. Well, it definitely is sometimes. It's not perfect all the time, but I think that's why we used to be hairy. Right. I still have some of that it doesn't seem to help I mean there's some fucking dudes in Russia. There's some Russian wrestlers that look like They look like a human lived 200,000 years Look like they're fucking covered in hair like everything all the way their neck all the way through their back their chest their arms [1:48:01] Full thick hair. Yeah, it's, that's probably what we were like. You ever seen a real heavy, hairy Russian wrestler? Sure, I mean, look at this dude. Oh yeah, that's my guy right there. I mean, this is a man that exists right now. But he doesn't look like he would stay warm in the winter. No, no, no, because it used to be a lot thicker. Yeah. But I think that was slowly over time when we chose to wear clothes, we invent it clothes and chose to wear clothes. I think slowly over time people lost all their body hair. But I think at one point in time, when you see these really, go that other picture of them where you see these back and everything, that one, that one perfect, perfect, that one. That's a fucking different kind of hair than the average person has. That dude has long hair on his shoulders do you think you you think that like if you have more hair your your older school prop like your genetics or older school probably why they're so good at wrestling too well there's that wrong it's shit that whole thing we have all we all have some a little bit of Neanderthal DNA yeah I have a shit done do you yeah yeah look at how [1:49:02] fucking hairy these dudes are I think this is just the 2023 version. I bet if you could go back 200,000 years ago people were just covered in there. I mean, then that's what they think about like ancient hominids It's not like one day they weren't hairy. Do you think I might be like quite a man? A little manly there. Thank you. How's it back back is clean, dude? I don't know how I don't know why it's a blessing I'm telling you this life is magical Do you really? Yeah, you don't you you a shaver? I might get my wife to shave my back really Can you imagine what would happen if I asked Natasha to shave my back? It would be a problem. It would be a no She would do it with those gloves She'd be complaining the entire She would do it with those gloves. She wouldn't go all the way up to the elbow. And she'd be complaining the entire time. Yeah, but it would be hilarious. It would be hilarious. She's probably filmed that. She would never. I cannot, I love this image though. Elbow length allows. She's got a custom made razor with golden pearls on it. [1:50:00] Face shield. Oh yeah, when you're in the cove of shields. Yeah, I get hairy. As do I. Yeah, I get itchy, though, too. When I get too much hair, it pulls up in between my tits. I get itchy. Do you shave your arms? No. No, most of the time not, but I have a few times. It makes my tattoos look better. I mean, you don't look very hairy from here. Yeah, they're here You can see it. Yeah, close this gives us all tattoos. I my hair stop. I swear to god my hair stops here It's like I have a reverse farmer's tan interesting. Yeah, maybe your people for the longest time wore short sleeves That could be true of my probably what it was you really think that yeah Yeah, I think that's why people have hairy Four arms for the most part but they don't usually have harry shoulders uh... i think that's where it comes from evolution there i think the whole thing comes from close uh... our whole adaptation to uh... ma i mean if you look at it like i would imagine urban people i give collectively people lived in urban environments for longer periods of time probably have [1:51:05] less body hair than, you know, if you follow their genetics, then people who live in like very cold rural climates, like fucking Canadian men that live in like Alberta, they're probably hairier dudes. It's weird that with what you're talking about, you're kind of talking in a strange way, it reminds me of like original sin too. It's like straight up biblical. Right, right, right. The foster abilities. The first big event that occurs is something goes wrong and the human becomes aware of its nakedness. It's not what you're talking about. It's not about cold, it's about like shame. Like what I do believe in answer to a question you asked me two hours ago. Like are all of these rules somehow connected to a functional Nearly scientific corollary, right like trigonosis or whatever. Yeah, I do believe that on some level every bit of Biblical information every bit of religious information it has some sort of allegorical and [1:52:02] Metaphorical Connection to our past like what does it mean that Adam and Eve saw their nakedness and realized they were naked and decided to cover up? It speaks to like a historical truth. Definitely, I don't think Adam and Eve saw their nakedness and were ashamed, but something occurred where we realized we are naked in the world and we must cover, we must cover because people can't look at what we're doing. Which just makes sense. Once they started wearing clothes, seeing people without clothes would be just a shocking thing. I can tell you an exact corollary for that in my personal life. When I go to Burning Man, last year was my 24th time at Burning Man. Oh my Jesus. And you're Stone Cold Silver. How do you do that? Stone's over the whole time. That would be hilarious. I'm the guy, I'm the designated driver. When I get there, I, a lot of nudity, less show every year as things get a little bit more sanitary there, but over the years lots of nudity. It was one of the primary characteristics women running around naked, everybody naked. I will be like zero titillation. [1:53:01] Like nothing about it is like, homino, oh mama, look at that hot naked lady. Zero. Because it becomes normal. Then I get back to the States, a low cut dress. I'm like, whoa, look at that over there. Oh, the little cleavage. It's like, your mind can adjust based on your circumstances. Like it's erotic. It's like there's zero erotic charge after a week at Burning Man to see a naked woman running, but fully naked. Well, isn't that why lingerie exists? Because the whole thrill is like taking it off. I don't feel as that it's very sheer and there's very little love it. Like, ooh, look at that. I feel that lingerie is a con and that I've never met a man that likes it. Interesting. Do you love it? Get to that in a moment. It will be right back. The peer-relatively hairless compared to our other ape relatives, but the density of the hair follicles on our skin is actually the same as would be expected of an ape-hour size. Whoa. The follicle. The fine hairs that cover our bodies, which have replaced the thicker ones seen on our close relatives, are thought to be an evolutionary leftover from our hair ancestors. Yeah, there it is. [1:54:00] Make sense. Oh, wow. Now scientists, find these fine hairs are useful after all, with people, with more of them are better at detecting bed bugs. More fine hairs means you're better at detecting bed bugs. You probably feel them more. Female ancestors preferred a bug-free mate, and so opted for hairier guys. Whoa. Oh, that's really interesting. How weird. I've had crabs here where I've that. Oh, that's really interesting. How weird. I've had crabs here where I've that. No, I have not. I've dodged that bullet. The research has found the body hair significantly enhanced how well people detected the bed bugs, which participants noticing the bugs on the hairy arm quicker than they did when tested on the hairless arm. Interesting. The hair is serving as motion detectors. Whoa. The hair is serving as motion detectors. Whoa. The hair also prolonged how long it took the parasites to find places to feed, presumably because they hindered movement. Interesting. So wait, it's better to have hair or worse? Yeah, follicles. Very to have follicles. To better have some hairs. When I got crabs, I was living with my mother. Oh shit. And I was probably 18 17 something like that and they tell you at the clinic [1:55:09] They say anybody that lives with you you got to give them this insecticide too. Oh, no, so I had to go to Signed your mom that you got crabs? Holy shit. And she had to slather herself in insecticide and sleep overnight with it. How mad would she at you? I'm lucky in that my mom is probably the most sexually open-minded woman in the universe. And she was not mad at all. She thought I think she thought it was funny. Oh, that's cool. Yeah, my mom is very chill about things like that. There was a time once. Probably happy you were getting some. No, really. She used to sit my brother and I down on Tuesday nights and read to us from a book called Boys and Sex. And she was just like, oh, open. When she found porn, when I hit puberty and she found porn, she took the porn. And rather than yell at me, she brought me to a lesbian, like a feminist vibrator shop. [1:56:01] And she said, you can pick any of the lesbian, text-based erotica that you want. She wanted to make sure if I was looking at porn, it would have like 90 pages of prose poetry before we got there good stuff. That's the kind of woman my mother was. She didn't care. She didn't care at all. Very open-minded. Well, that's lucky, especially in the crab situation. Well, definitely in that situation. The whole idea of V.D. Killing people is so strange, but like that's a lot of the ways people died back in the day It was syphilis right syphilis untree. Oh, you couldn't treat it right it was this was pretty something to do before right antibiotics and Penicillin and all that shit. Yeah, what the fuck did they do? I mean that's literally your your skin rotted out I've never had any of those I've only had of those. I've only had the bugs. I don't think people get it anymore. If they do get it, they can cure it. Is that true? No, people must still get it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You can get it, but I think they can cure it. They won't kill you. No, I think they just give you penicillin, I believe. Do you know with rabies, you have to take painful shots. [1:57:07] I think they go into your stomach. I think it's a large needle that goes into your stomach. And I think you have to do it multiple times. And I think if you don't do it within a certain period of time you're done. There was a crazy story about the first woman person who ever survived symptomatic rabies that I heard on, I think, radio lab. The basically she started displaying all these symptoms and like fear of water, rage, all that kind of stuff. And that's fatal, 100% of the time. But this, anyway, her parents took her to the doctor and they go, this really made me laugh. It's tragic, but it made me laugh. The doctor's like, is anything unusual happened? Anything that you think could have maybe brought this about? And they're like, no, nothing we can think of. Nothing bitten by a dog or a bat. They go, oh no, yeah, she was bitten by a bat. Is that what she's talking about? Yeah, she was bitten by a bat. She was at church in a bat flu on her nose and bitter. It was like, yeah, I think that might coma into because something weird about rabies apparently like your body it's kind of what we're talking about with human evolution [1:58:08] Your body can beat it, but it I'm not going to articulate this well your body can Moves to beat it, but it moves at just below the speed of the virus The virus moves faster than your body's ability to beat it if If the virus was slower, then your body would cure it, but it goes faster. And so they put this girl into an imposed coma and slow down somehow in ways I don't understand. Slow down her system in such a way that the rabies went a little bit more dormant and then her body was able to supersede the speed of the virus. They still do that they do it regularly now but it doesn't work It's not like a universal cure. I guess the Milwaukee protocol recommends inducing therapeutic coma by ketamine and Back to the rabies. There it is mid-to-zole. I'm during rabies participants the first week of ICU admittance [1:59:03] So yeah, it's like it's a system now. It doesn't work like well, but it works a lot better than- This is the ability of the natural host to mean response to clear the rabies virus. The patient is supported through the intense exotoxic phase is the basic premise of this strategy. So that makes sense too, because you'd be able to hyd hydrate them because one of the things that happens to people they no longer can drink any water. Fear of water. They just start throwing it up as soon as it gets in their mouth. They said in that podcast that Rabie presents in the way that an ancient, and by ancient, like a million-year-old disease presents, it doesn't feel similar to the more modern diseases and pathologies, pathogens that we have in our systems now, but the way it presents is like, it's like an ancient killer. It's like a ghost of our past. It's crazy how common it is in the animal kingdom too. Right. And it's really wild that it gets animals to bite you to give it to you too. [2:00:01] That's why it feels evil, right? It does feel like a sickness. Like a vampire. Yeah. Right. So the first reported fatality due to rabies in the United States despite receiving appropriate post exposure, prophylaxis, according to a recent article published in clinical infectious, always 84. 84 year old man had died in 2021 about six months after waking up in the morning while a rabid bat was biting on his right hand now This is what we should be afraid of that's this is the scary thing about it But it is rabies right because it is vampires because vampire right and the scared of water it all seems like Yeah, you used to use garlic to keep bats away is that true? It's not 100% effective, but that's a medieval time. That's really is the vampire thing is main part of things. That's it. How do we solve this? Bam. We did it, dude. Dude, rabies, by the way, is like the fact that it killed, that article said what it killed the guy who took the appropriate. Yeah. But he was old. If that happened, we're fucked. You know what the Tasmanian devil? Mm- cancer. Yeah, it's like it's like a VD, right? [2:01:06] Is that what it is? It's a cancer though. Right. A man's cancer goes contagious. Right. That's the scariest thing I've ever heard in my life the fact that it can exist in one animal means it could exist in all of them very very scary What is it from? Tasmania devils are affected by two independent transmissible cancers known as the devil facial tumor and the devil facial tumor, two. Both cancers are spread by biting and cause the appearance of tumors in the face or inside the mouth of affected Tasmanian devils. So that's not sexually transmitted. No speaking of a disease feeling mean like what you're saying with rabies, the reason that the, oh, why? The reason that they transmit it so much, they have the cancer and their thing and they've got a behavioral tick where the way that they, I think, fight is to like mash their faces together. So they have the confluence of the disease that can spread that way and the behavioral tick that allows it to spread. These viruses are just like us. They want out. [2:02:01] They want to live. They want to survive. Yeah. And they they want to live, they want to survive, you know, and they will somehow weirdly find a way to to spread themselves. So that's why variants are so strange. Like the the virus will find out that you have some immunity to some certain aspect of it and so they just slightly change, so it speaks past your immune system. I had a weird very cosmic theory about the pandemic in COVID. I know that you don't cotton with conspiracy theories about COVID, but I do. No, I'm joking. This is more sort of metaphysical though. When we were raised, our family, like I remember being told to wash my hands, like all the time, right? But I don't really feel like I told my kids that, like it wasn't like, it used to be like almost religious, like wash, wash, wash, wash. And then by the time I had my, I told her to wash her hands, but it wasn't like, you must. And then all of a sudden a new pathogen came into the human, a genome and it was like, I mean, obviously, I don't think that washing hands is that a big of a deal with COVID, but I had this thought, [2:03:06] what if viruses go like dormant until we kind of, because the reason, this is my big weird theory, the reason that we were told wash, wash, wash, is residual trauma from Spanish flu, this is my theory here, right? It's like your grandparents lived through that and then they embedded it in your parents, like wash your hands, it's super important and then it got to you. And then it started to fade away a little bit and then all of a sudden you have a new pathogen. I was like, what if these viruses have a little, like a weird sort of animal consciousness of like, okay, they've forgotten about the washing hands thing. Let's pop up into the human population. Anyway, I know it's a little cookie. Yeah, I don't think that's it. The Spanish flu was weird, because people didn't really die from the Spanish flu. They died of other diseases that they got while they had the Spanish flu. Like what did they die of? They died of meningitis and stuff. [2:04:02] There was a bunch of different things that people died from. All of them would be cured by antibiotics today. Do you know how I got the name of Spanish flu? This is an interesting story. I do, but I forgot. Basically that it wasn't Spanish. It came in America. It started in America, but we were in the midst of World War One. And so every country was in this like medium bargo to not say, oh God, there's a new disease in America because it would have made our army look weak. And every other country didn't want admitted either. But Spain was either not involved in the war or didn't have that embargo somehow. They reported the disease. And so they, so for the rest of the time in the Spanish flu. Another weird thing I found out, the flu that you get today is the Spanish flu. It's the variant that sprung off from the Spanish flu. Like weakened and weakened and weakened and infinite amount of times. But the thing that we get that we call flu is just the cousin of the Spanish flu. Wow. And the reason why it's weak is because it serves the virus better to not kill you. Exactly. Because it could spread to more people. [2:05:02] What a weird fucking thing. It's why. It's almost like they I don't mean literally with my cock-a-mami theory that it was consciousness. Let's go back. I mean more like that. Like that it'll weaken in order to be effective. Which is the fact that it can do that, that it adjusts and changes. That's what's really scary. Like a lot of people are scared of this disease called CWD right now. CWD is called chronic wasting disease and it's affected a lot of deer. And there's deer all over the country that have this chronic wasting disease. And it hasn't jumped to humans. I think it has jumped to some mice. I think there's in some parts of the country they've tested mice and they tested positive for this stuff. But it hasn't jumped. It's a pre-on disease. So it's like a mad cow. Oh, uh-huh. You know, um, yuck and cruts fell disease. And then if you get it, you're fucked. You're fucked. And the end is horrific. You know, the, these deer wandering around just drooling, emaciated. They look like skeletons. And they're just like zombies. [2:06:01] I don't like this chronic wasting disease. Well, it's very scary. It's all these things are scary because occasionally they jump. Right. Because these things they can figure out a way to change. They morph over time. It's not if it is when with pathogens jumping into the brain. It will happen. Especially with large scale agriculture. Right. And the thing about large scale, especially industrial agriculture, is it's very unsanitary. It's fucking disgusting. And just like how the plague was started in all these different parts of the world, because people were shitting in the streets and living in filth and no sanitation. And that's probably exactly how it starts with them as well. The virus is particularly deadly because it triggered a cytokine storm ravaging the strong, you're talking about the Spanish flu. Spanish flu? Yeah, yeah, yeah, no about that. That's one of the weirdest viruses of the virus flu. It killed young healthy people more than it killed old and infirm. Yeah, it killed young soldiers. Apparently it was no more aggressive than previous influenza strains. Malnourishment, overcrowded medical camps in hospitals, [2:07:06] poor hygiene exacerbated by the war, promoted bacterial super infection, killing most of the victims after a typically prolonged deathbed. That is crazy. Super infections. It was scary word, man. It was the war. Yep. It's like we became a part of the pathogen. Human society became a part of the pathogen that allowed it to kill Apparently the 2009 swine flu was really bad too Burke got that he says the closest he ever felt dying scary He said it was horrible. You see the worst flu. He's ever gotten his life. He was wrecked forever What about a new non-fluence of virus? forever. What about a new non-fluence virus that we're going to close on? There it is. What was it? However, as historical records dating back to the 1700s show, every 10 to 40 years, the world suffers a global flu pandemic. The result of a major antigenic drift, [2:08:00] the virus mutates so much that the human body no longer recognizes it and it's left defenseless. Woohoo! The resulting epidemic spreads faster than scientists can isolate, producing and distribute a vaccine. This is what happened in 1918. Dude, this is sort of my, this is kind of my cockamama theory kind of. I mean, if you think about all the different diseases that kill people, they are coexisting life forms. You know, that they, viruses and bacteria, they are coexisting life forms. They're viruses and bacteria, they're a type of life. I don't know if they really call viruses life forms. They categorize them in a different way, but essentially, it is like a life form. It's the same thing, it just wants to fuck. It's just like Marshall. It's like living your body and reprodu reproduce in there and get to other people. But the wildest one is rabies. Because it makes the animals bite so that they get it too. So other people get it. Other animals get it. It makes them more aggressive. It's really, like I said, it's like a prehistoric megalodon. [2:09:00] It's coming from our past. Dinosaur Yeah. Well, that was the premise of 28 days later, right? Yeah, they created one and gave it to chimps and the chimps just biting people or biting That movie fucking rules man. I do love that movie the great manure crisis of 1894 This also caused a lot of disease problems. Yeah, the streets because everywhere had a horse. We're filled with shit That's all you that's all horse shit. Look at that. Click on that one up there that has a text below it, 99%, yeah, that one. Look at that. That's manure. That's shit. All throughout the street. So you're smelling shit. Everyone's getting shit in their nostrils. You're getting, with your smelling it, that means that some of that is getting in your body, you're inhaling shit. They're making a lot of it. This was a pile over 60 feet high. Oh! But on a positive note, that prankster on TikTok, that's was a glory year for him. He was able to find buckets of shit right at his very feet. They didn't have YouTube back then, he really could make a living. I mean, I don't think he's arrested. Yeah, I think that's good. Look at that 1894. [2:10:05] This great horse manure crisis. Until they figured out cars, that's how people got around. You had to ride a fucking animal. Well, shit, I wild it, that's pretty reason. What's that? That until like 200 years ago, you had to ride a fucking animal. It's wild. And in that poor things, there was a, I think it was historical, sort of semi-historical, there was a combustion engine cab, but it was a stage coach with a fake horse head on it. In the very beginning of stage coaches, people were so used to having a horse in front, it would just be like a little head. That makes sense. Godfather style. Yeah. It's crazy how much the world has changed in 200 years. And feels unsustainable? Have you heard this? You know about the Fermi's paradox, right? This comes from the... Fermi, yeah. The space paradox. Yeah, okay, so you know that, but you hear that, I'm sure you did, the latest like theory on why they, because that's the question that it raises. If there's infinite amount of planets, where are the people, where are the aliens? [2:11:01] Right. And the new theory, this really sent a chill down my spine, is that every planet goes through the same basic process, which is that they become in 200 years. They go from pre-industrial revolution to industrial revolution to strict mining themselves for resources, and then their population explodes because they can sustain more population and they need to extract more resources and then they go to get to their like space age. And by the time human any planet gets to like space exploration, it has exploded in population and resource stripping to such a degree that they reach a decision that they have to make every society is either we continue to strip mine and populate and go extinct because we're going to run out of room and resources or we shut down and do an imposed like a dark ages population control just like shut everything down stop this. So we'll never evolve to the point where we can get to an earth because we all go through [2:12:03] the same historical arc. And maybe it's a longer arc than we think. That could be true. Maybe we're in the middle of it and maybe that's what asteroids are for. Maybe asteroids come along when we get a little cocky and they slam into the Earth and we start from scratch again. Then we have the same genetic because the intelligent people that figured out had built the pyramids, but we're this new confused barbaric version of it, it's been fucking eating rats for a thousand years. Oh, I like that. So there's not just an infinite amount of Joe's and Mocha's. There's an infinite amount of human populations, like just regenerating and regenerating for an infinite amount of time until we get to the good one. Well, I'm a big fan of what they call the Younger Drys Impact Theory. The Younger Drympath theory is based on a bunch of things, but one of the things that's based on is core samples. When they've done these core samples, they show that around 11,800 years ago, without a doubt, the earth was hit by comments. And they think this is what happened that stopped the ice age. This is why the polar ice caps, they used to be ice covering North America, half of North [2:13:04] America would be a mile plus sheet of ice. That was, and then it all stopped very quickly. And it also caused the death, the extinction of 65% of the mammals that lived. Right, I've heard about that. Yeah, and they think the people that are proponents of this theory like Graham Hancock and Rendo Carlson, they think that human beings had achieved a very high level sophistication. And probably a different direction that we have now. And that's the pyramids that go back to the Tepi, that's all these ancient structures that they don't understand how people could have explained or built a long, long, long, fucking time ago that we can't do now. And that's what happened. The impacts happen. And then society rebuilds thousands of years later. Right. So thousands of years of barbarism, and then six thousand years ago in Mesopotamia, language, written language, emerges, agriculture, they start, they start figuring things out again. It's like Atlantis. Yeah. Yes. Natasha was into this documentary [2:14:01] with us. Yeah. I remember this. Ancient apocalypse. That's right. That's right. It's amazing. And it's very likely that that's, there's physical evidence now. It used to be this wacky theory. And people would say, well, there's no evidence of that theory. And then they started discovering things that they, like, go Beckley-Tepi's the best example that are absolutely, absolutely over 11,000 years old. And so they go, okay, 11,000 years ago, people were building these complex stone structures, like how the fuck did they do that when we thought people were hunter-gatherers right then? Right. And then when they find these core samples, there's a high level of aridium in that time period. And that's very common in space and very rare on earth. And it's like a sheet of it. As long as also with a sheet in a lot of these areas, it's just pure carbon, where it seems like everything burned. And so it's very likely that we were pelted, and it's very likely it's gonna happen again. It every June and every November, we pass through this comet storm. You always do this to me. You're the one that told me about the Super Volcano. Yes. And I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. You should think about it. Why? What good does it do me? It doesn't do you any good, but it's good to know that every six to eight hundred thousand years Don't worry Yellowstone goes don't worry up his information. We go. It's a wrap. Oh, man [2:15:11] Continent killer. Oh, I don't want that. I don't want wasting disease. I don't want Cognitive killer and other things that don't want but maybe those are the things that keep us from getting to the place Where we nuke each other into oblivion. Maybe those are the reset buttons of the universe where if we go down the bad path and maybe this this race to try to be, to have good morals and ethics and have society evolve at the same level that the human mind and technology evolves and to overcome this constant need for war and controlling resources, which have dominated human culture from the beginning of time. And that maybe it's this battle, maybe this culture war that we're all fighting that people are complaining about now, maybe part of that is this sort of struggle to achieve a higher level of existence. [2:16:00] And maybe it's done in the wrong way on both sides to a certain extent, but ultimately what it is is trying to sort out What's right and what's wrong and what's good and what's bad and why certain things take place and if we don't if we don't get to that And we keep keeping engaging in wars then we never reach a technological level of sophistication that allows us to stop natural disasters right Right. If we can get to a point where we can knock asteroids out of the sky and do something to release the pressure of the Super Volcano and figure out a way to not have people starve and figure out all those things could be accomplished if we get to a certain point. And I think we're in a race. I think AI plays a gigantic part of that race. I think the race just got really fucking weird. That's what I think AI plays a gigantic part of that race. I think the race just got really fucking weird. That's what I think. Yeah, that will neural link. I mean, you know, the, the, the, the doomsday scenario of AI. And by the way, you're an optimist. That's interesting. I didn't know that. It seems like you're kind of an optimist. I'm optimistic. I think, I think human beings generally society, if it exists long enough there's always going to be terrible [2:17:06] moments but ultimately people want the same thing they want their community to be good they want their friends to live they want their families to live you're terrified of other people that might want to take from you the thing that gives you joy and happiness and community and love but ultimately I think we're going to figure out a way if human beings can exist long enough. Well, we can work things out much better than we're doing right now. I think one of the things that hinders our ability to work things out is just like you were talking about sign language, like that you're signed from America is different than the sign from the United Kingdom, I think if we develop a universal language through translation through technology, we will eliminate a lot of miscommunication and a lot of this failure to understand each other because we look at each other as the other. We look at each other as something that's very different than us. Right. And they're already doing that on Samsung phones. [2:18:01] Samsung phones, the new Galaxy S24 Ultra comes out with AI, and one of the features of AI is a translate. So we can sit apart from each other, and in real time, this thing could take your, if you're speaking French, you can do it in your ears, and headphones, or you can do it on the phone in written language, it does both. And if it's in headphones, we both have it, and I could talk to you in English and you could understand it if you speak French. Cause it'll translate into perfect French and then we're close enough as it is and get better. And then you can speak French and I will hear it in English. We need that for like a liberal and conservative. Yeah. You just put headphones in and it's like, oh, that's what you meant. Okay, you're okay. I mean, that's the tribal part. The tribal part is that people just adopt ideologies wholeheartedly and if you don't, you're not on the team. Just like the people that are in your neighborhood looked at you weird, like you were a goyam because you're not all the way in. Right, tribalism is the downfall of society, but I also, I love tribes. [2:19:02] I do love. If they're cool tribes, we just need charitable conscientious tribes that are kind to other people. And just enjoy the differences instead of thinking the differences as being some sort of a negative. And that's what you're saying is that we're hopefully we're evolving towards a situation where with a universal language or at least a universal understanding, you can see someone that's different and think that they're not, what are the differences between, isn't that awful to, isn't that interesting? Yes, and then because we're in a growth phase, you're gonna go through overcorrections. I think a lot of the cultural war that we're involved in, all the craziness that's happening in society, it's an overcorrection, and then people are gonna get fed up with it and they're gonna move into more conservative direction. And then they'll get fed up with that and then they'll move to a more liberal direction. It's like it goes back and forth because we're trying to figure out what's the right way to do it. And we're basing life on what we were taught by people who didn't know what the fuck they were doing. Which is most of our parents and most of their parents. Like they didn't know what the fuck they were doing. They, my grandparents didn't know what the fuck was going on [2:20:05] in the world. They raised kids, didn't know what the fuck was happening. They raised me. I know, I barely know what the fuck is going on. My kids know more than me that their generation will figure it out a little bit better. And if we can stay alive, we can eventually get to some commonality. And we can realize that a lot of this stupidity is based on our human system of these tribal interactions. It's kind of ingrained in our genetics. Or we need a mega enemy. Maybe that's AI. We all come together as a tribe. Or UFOs. Or UFOs. That's our mega enemy. Will you please get here, guys, because we need to solve some of these problems here. I think they're here already. Oh, yeah. I think they've always like, hey, what's up? I think they're interdimensional. And I think, I've been reading this, I've been reading Diane Pasoca's new book, the other book, the first one. That's the one I got there. Yeah, so this lady who's a religious scholar, I'm reading American Cosmic now, we'll get you a shot here. Oh, sorry, yeah, I have a book event tonight. It, I'm super excited. I could fucking talk to you all all night. Yeah, well, we'll wrap this up, [2:21:06] but I'll recommend this book to people. It's called American Cosmic. And it's essentially about this whole flying saucer, you, I just did a whole podcast with the woman. But now this is our previous book that I'm reading. And it connects it to religion. And it connects it to the stories in the Bible of Ezekiel, that Ezekiel is essentially seeing a UFO, and that these things are not just a physical thing, that there's some sort of a psychological aspect to them. There's some sort of a frequency that we connect to occasionally as human beings, as thinking creatures. You're saying we get to a state of kind of enlightenment where the dimensional portal opens up for a split second and that's what we see. I don't know if you would call it enlightenment. Or frenzy? A state of being able to receive whatever the frequency of these things operate on. And I think there's a lot of stories from ancient religion that's probably based on this. And I think as we get more and more of an understanding of quantum physics [2:22:12] and this concept of dimensions and this concept of the ability of something that's far more advanced than us to manipulate dimensions and to visit back and forth. And that the potential is that maybe that is where all intelligent life forms eventually evolve too if given enough time and they do it correctly. They become interdimensional travelers and that what we're looking at, we're looking at these grays, these weird looking things, that's us in the future. Come back to visit. Yeah, interdimensional. This is our path and we will become these genderless things, the giant heads that use telepathy. Like just like this Elon Musk invention, this neural ink that's gonna allow you to scroll so paralyzed people can use the internet. And it's going to be able to operate machinery. The one of the things that Bob Lazar said [2:23:01] about that craft right there, the sport model, that he allegedly worked on in Area 51 Site 4, was that they didn't have controls in them. They operated them with their minds. And it's so funny because when he first said that, it probably sounded, I mean, it still sounds a little bit like bullshit, but it probably sounds great. But when you look at neural link, you go, wait a minute. Yeah. I guess I could see operating a craft with my mind in a thousand years from now. There's that idea that AI, when robotics catches up to AI and AI can implant itself in a robot warrior, then they are like an entity. And then they look and they go, what is the only threat to us? Oh, it's humans. Let us get rid of the terminator. So that makes it so that our only hope is neurowink, is hopefully we can fuse and go, and the AI will not say what's our threat, they go, oh no, that's us. Yeah, we will emerge. That's our meat us. I think that's what's gonna happen no matter what, because I think once it happens, the people that have it [2:24:01] will have such a massive advantage over everyone else that has to use a device. It's like steroids. Yeah, well, it's not just like that. It's like having a car, living in a house, having a talent wasn't having the internet. If you live in the woods by yourself with no language, you're fucked. Right. It's like the tribe coming out of the jungle and saying I want some clothes. Exactly. But I'm not on a mega mega level. I'm on a mega mega level. I think that's where we're going. I think that's what the UFOs are. Well, I mean, do you think that in this universe, my book is the best seller? I think it's going to be fucking huge. Thank goodness. Now, this is what's important. There it is right there. Subcult to a vulture, a memoir, in 16s by Moshe Cashor available. Now, did you do the audiobook? I did do the audiobook, yeah. Yeah, I did do the audio book. Yes, I did. I thought you wanted to act or do it. No, never. Although what's really funny is there's a part. They try to pressure you to do it. No, no, no, they want me to do it. I think they like when comics do it. But there's a funny part in there where my friend Larry, early in my life, throws me up against a wall or whatever. And it's a moment about like, [2:25:07] popping your head at your ass basically. Like he basically threw me up against the wall and like shifted my perspective into like, of course that's not what I'm supposed to be doing. But I had this passage in the book where I was like, I mean, it's very short passage but I'm like, I'm not reading that shit. And so I went forensically into my past and contacted Larry and said, Larry, it would be awesome if you would read the part of Larry and I found him and he did it. So it's me and Larry. That's great. That's awesome. It's out now. I'm going to see you tonight. Oh awesome. I'll see you at the club. Good luck at your book event. Say hi to Duncan. Thank you very much. My pleasure brother.