#2090 - Bobby Lee

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Bobby Lee

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Bobby Lee is a stand-up comic, actor, and podcaster. He's the co-host of "TigerBelly," with Khaylyla Kuhn, and "Bad Friends," with Andrew Santino. www.bobbylee.live

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Just go. I made it. I'm here. And it's just like what a blessing. No, no, no, no... Let me finish this. What a blessing. Over the years, people on the internet were like why don't you do Rogan? And I said I don't even know how. And I'm here now and I just feel so present and I feel mindful and it's gonna be a great one. Anyways... I'm so glad you're here. Yeah, we talked about doing it fucking a thousand times. A thousand times. Yeah, it never happened. And people thought they were like, we had a problem with each other. No, we know. In fact, here's the deal, Joe. Okay, Bobby. Not only do we not have a problem with each other, right? You've been a very I set to me over the years on the phone. Like when I'm in trouble, you call and you're so helpful and you've got me through a lot of like difficult situations. I love you, bud. So we're the opposite of trouble. We're in a family. Yes, that's how I feel. Yeah, but you know people, but I just didn't know how to do it. Why are we sending? Anytime you want to do it, you were like, okay, and that would be like, but there's no numbers. Who do I call? You call me? Oh, I don't know what to call. This whole thing is literally booked on my phone. Oh, it is? Yeah. Well, now right now, I have a guy shout out to my man, Matt, who I contact when I want someone to get, like if I want to reach out, like the cat Williams or something like that. Like reach out to this guy, try to get him on. And that's it. And then it gets, it all gets booked on my phone. Wow. Well, no one know and no one's half the battle. You know what they said? G.I. Joe just set that. Duh. What? Yeah. Yeah. It's that way it's like the whole thing. It's because like I been to Tom's, if you've been to Tom's, Tom's, it's like they have a real production staff. There's all these people running around with clipboards and it's like, what the, birds house, he had eight people behind computers, just typing, what the fuck they're doing, emailing us. Social media, I'm crazy, promoting arena shows, everyone's going nuts. [2:02] Me, no. I don't want that in my life. Why would you need it? I don't want it. You have white guy. Yeah. You have just some average white guy. Not no fans, but you're not, you know. With all due respect, Jamie does take the place of white. At least two regular people, if not three. He's great, Ed. How many people? I don't know, you tell me. I say at least two maybe three it might Jamie might take the place of three people Wow, what are those? These are pouches the cocoa pomegranate. Oh, okay I say little rogues all like these is it is it tobacco? It's just nicotine Oh, it's just the power. Yeah, this the path of the pouch those are tobacco. Yeah, the other tobacco. Yeah And when it when it get blisters I stop okay, but it burns through your Yeah. And when it gets blisterers, I stop. Oh, okay, but it burns through your cheeks. Hi, buddy. Yeah. It was telling me that. Yeah, yeah. It made his gums recede. Yeah, chewing. Yeah. But then when you take a break, they grow back. It's like, oh, nice. It's like a plant. Your gums. Yeah, yeah. You're trimming it. Maybe you get better gums that way. Yeah, but I quit smoking two years ago, so it's like, you know, that was tough. [3:06] Was it? Cigarettes? Yeah. Well, I quit drugs and cigarettes. Well, you went clean, you were clean for a long time. 17 years. And then what was the first thing you did? Well, I relapsed twice. So after the 17 years, my dad died. And you know, he died and then my mom goes, selfie, so I took a selfie with my mom and the family and my dad was dead. And I decided that was so weird that I took a gummy. I brought one just in case. How many milligrams? At that time it was like 10 milligrams. But then I had other stuff in my mom's house, you know what I mean? And I took the rest and then I relapsed for like four months, then I got sober again and then when things got crazy in my life, I did it again. What did you go with again? Did you go with just weed? Weed in drinking and it's fine at first. [4:01] Like I remember like taking an edible, going to Hawaii because I was shooting mag and PI or something. And it's fun for a couple of months, but then I just, I overdo it. And then it's like 24 hours a day, and I'm drinking 24 hours a day. And then people are like, Andrew, you know, Santina was concerned. Like one time he knocked on my hotel room and I walked on, I poo all over my body. Whoa. Yeah, and I was in a blackout drunk and he goes, you had poo all over your body. That's a good friend. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did he clean you up? Yeah, he cleaned me up. Yeah, he's like, I don't use the best. He's the best. Well, he was a man. You know how he gets mad. like I would have. I don't think you would have. I probably would. You would have cleaned it, but you would have said, clean up in then 10 minutes. I'll sort of chuck you into the tub. Yeah, I get cold plunged. Yeah, hosey down. So it got bad and then what happened was, Bob Sackett died and then Louie died. And for some reason I was drinking and doing, [5:02] and also when I was coughing up blood. Oh. I have these chunks of curdled blood. Oh. Right, like a ball. And I had convinced myself that I had fucking cancer. Oh. And I always, I go, that's comes in free. Nothing on that big, like those guys. But in my mind, it's like, I'm next. Oh, shit. And I couldn't sleep. I couldn't even fucking terrible. Oh fuck. But then I got sober and things are fine What was the blood did you ever find out then I got an x-ray done and it's like it's fine I just when I guys smoked so much weed and cigarettes at the same time. Oh my god It's so long to believe That's a blood would come out. Oh my god I remember I would cough and do it like a towel or something, and I would send it to my ex-coli-la. And... Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, no, I mean if you thought you had like some crazy disease like you but oh my god Did you see these ladies in in Denver today? [6:07] They took a live Ebola vaccine. There's only been the Ebola cases here. It's not like it's in Africa right but this doctor Was encouraging people to take this a Ebola vaccine just in case Ebola hits Why does everybody want to freak me out? I know Why does this lady want to freak me out by taking this? Like who knows the fuck is gonna happen to you now? And why does everybody wanna freak me out at the fucking possibility of some new disease coming along and killing everybody? But Ebola's old school. It's a scary one. Hot zone. It liquefides your organs, right? Denver Health Medical Team receives Ebola vaccine. The team became some of the first people to receive the live Ebola vaccine for preventative measures in case of a future outbreak. The first people wait, oh my god. Wait, is it a new, is the Ebola vaccine new? They not have a vaccine before? And now they do? I don't know. What the fuck people? But back in the day when they had it, [7:01] they just bombed the village, right? That's a good question. What did they do? I don't know what they did. I don't think it's that easy to spread. I think he has to be spread by bodily fluids. It's an airborne. Right. Yeah, yeah. But they could fix that. You think that Chinese? You think that Chinese? Oh. Chinese guys. A little bit of that. And look now it flies to the air. All right, if it was like COVID, like that easy, but it both looked like. We're fucked. But that's what scares the shit out of me, man. They keep talking about it. These fucking creeps in the world economic forum, they all get together and talk about preparation for disease acts. They're calling it virus X or disease X. They're scaring the shit out of me but do you think it's let me I Don't know can I just ask you something? I don't know me. I don't know much. Okay about nothing right but you believe that it was like Man-made well, it's definitely man-made. Okay. Yeah, I wouldn't say definitely because I'm not really an expert Yeah, but every expert that I have talked to that examine the virus itself [8:06] the the cleavage sites the way it It skipped all like Animal forms like you can't find that virus out in the wild and then also that made a leap to person It apparently has all of the earmarks of being engineered Wow, this is but this is something that they do this is not like science fiction like so when we say that it's not like we're just making up some story about some lab whether make in viruses well they fucking one hundred percent absolutely do it and they lied about funding it that was a big thing with Fauci in the n i h they lied about funding gain of function research and Rand Paul grilled them. You can watch it on YouTube and then they lied about whether or not they found this first of all was happening, whether or not they were doing gain of function research and whether or not they funded it. If they funded it through another organization, they funded another organization, the other [9:01] organization, Funds Blue Hand Lab. And there's a bunch of labs. That's not the only lab. There's a shit ton of them. I visited one with Duncan. We went down to one in Galveston, Texas. It's fucking terrifying. And I don't know if they're doing gain-of-function research there, but I know they have some of the most deadly viruses and diseases known to man, all with these crazy ventilation tubes and everyone's walk around these hazmat suits and shit and they let Duncan and I there why oh and by the way we hadn't slept so Duncan and I this is when we were doing Joe Rogan questions everything for sci-fi Duncan and I we flew together so we had to fly together to go to Texas and both of us got barbecued. I mean, we took like 500 milligram adibles and totally missed our flight. In the airport, we were just talking for like hours. Like, oh my god, what time is it? Like, drop back. And they're like, this flight's gone. The flight's gone. Like, oh no. So the next flight we had to take place [10:00] was like five in the morning. And it got us there right before we're supposed to fill. So we literally stayed up all night, flew it. I think we got a hotel for one hour. I think we actually got a hotel for one hour. And then we flew, uh, woke up in the morning and, I mean, just got up, got in the car, rather, it just went straight to this lab. So we're delirious. We're still probably high. And we're in this crazy Bio lab where they have Ebola Whoa, they have everything they have you name it they've got it everything that kills everybody and it's it's all like these big thick Plexiglass Oh my god Wow and me and Doug were both like oh my god dude are you in a suit? No, no, no, no, We only went into like the administrative offices. We did they did not let us onto the floor or we didn't go anywhere near any diseases. They just let us through the but the doctors scared the fuck out of me because what he was saying to me is he because our our our our piece was all on bio weapons and one of the things that I [11:04] interviewed this guy who was formerly from the Soviet Union, I believe it's the Soviet, it might have been Ukraine. I think it was Soviet Union and when he left, he was saying that they at one point in time had literal vats of anthrax, just like a giant fucking swimming pool filled with anthrax. He said they had so much of it. They had so, like bio weapons were a big part of the strategy. Look, if everything goes fucked, if we just decided to start killing each other, if we decided to start new-king-teach-other, that was one of the things that we're gonna do. Did they use anthrax and knob? I don't believe so. What's Agent Orange, the same thing? No, no. Agent orange is a defoliation. It's agent orange that would spray on the plant so they could find the people in the jungle. Is it orange? That's a good question. Like if I saw it? Right. That's a good question. By orange. [12:00] Right. I don't know what it looks like. There was another word for it, right? What was the other word for Agent Orange? Was this like a tactical term? Cause if they, use it if you, no, these things, they just call it Agent Yellow. Baaah. No. Baaah. Baaah. Cut that, cut that out. I've always said that like, Asian people take jokes better than anybody. You know why? Why? Why all emojis yellow no one complains? It's true they don't complain. Yeah yellow thumbs up yellow smiley face guy yellow girl Everyone's yellow. Look at us complaints people get mad at me because I allow comics to do Asian accents in front of me And I laugh at it because I think it's funny But then people think that I'm like a you know, um, you you know, like an uncle Chang, you know, right, right, right. They said, they said, they said, Yes, well, those people are all your friends and friends mock each other all the time. Yeah. I felt my friends mocked me for being short. They mocked me for being bald. They mocked me for being old. It's fun. It's fun. If they mock me for being Italian, it doesn't work like known cares. It's not a bad one. That's why you can call Italians guineas. [13:07] Nobody gives a shit. They'll call each other guineas, you can call them guineas, known cares. Because people don't really hate Italians. Yeah. They find them annoying, like the little gold chain ones. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They get some of our little, but that's also part of the flavor of that culture. It's fun. But Asian hate is a different kind of hate. Because Asian hate legitimately people will walk up to Asian people and punch them after COVID. Oh yeah, it's fucking wild. Well, yeah. Just, I mean, that's just strict racist hate walking right up to someone and punching them. Just like an old man. man old men old ladies. Yeah It's wild and you don't even they don't even know what kind of Asian is they don't for the Philippines It could be someone from China. They have no fucking idea. They're just just hitting it was fucking terrible Yeah, terrifying. Yeah, that shit's real. Yeah, but when it comes to like [14:01] Comedy like back in the day like your backstage with a bunch of comics We say all kinds of fucked up shit. We try to make each other laugh, and it's hard to make us laugh. Or shock. Yeah, or shock. Yeah, yeah. Well, shock to make you laugh. Yeah, the shocking thing is just so you go, what the fuck is wrong with you? Yeah. How many times will we in the green room, and Joey Diaz And what the fuck is wrong with you? Yeah, yeah. We're on the ground laughing. Yeah, but that's what he's trying to do. He's not a bad person. He's trying to make you laugh. And then we do it, you know, publicly around, you know, on podcasts and stuff. And people just get fucking crazy. You know what I mean? You know what it's like, it's like being around any person that's used to a certain thing. Like, if you ever been around soldiers, especially like special operator guys, like Navy SEAL type dudes, they got a couple of drinks and when they start talking war stories. Yeah, holy shit. They're funny stories about people getting blown up. Like they have funny stories about it. And you, guess what? [15:01] You can't bring that up at the fucking PTA meeting. Yeah, where are you gonna, where you gonna, you have to be around like-minded people. Yeah. To understand those kind of experiences to be able to talk about the cops, some of the cops I know have the most fucked up senses of humor. Yeah. They've seen so much, they need a release valve, man. They need fucking something to let out all the gunshot victims and all the deaths and highway act, all the things they see, man, they see so much. Also, these port cities back in the day, right? You'd have different races and stuff, and they didn't speak the language, and the way they would connect is make fun of each other. And people's accents, and it was a, it was a, you bonded that way. But there's the nicest thing they could do with each other back then. Those poor cities were just filled with violence. Yeah, probably. Violence, it's all gangs in New York. Yeah. That's what it was like, man. That's real. Yeah. When people came here from other countries, like my ancestors came here, my grandparents came here in the 1920s. Wow. They came from Italy and my father saw they came from Ireland. One from Ireland, he was from from Ireland the mothers from Italy. They're all immigrants everybody's an immigrant those people that came to that place they all were so wild they were [16:11] willing to get on a boat with their kids and travel across the ocean you didn't know if you had a job you didn't know what it looked like yeah you had to look at a drawing of it yeah yeah I mean you had to look somebody had to tell you you had to get a letter from Uncle Pete Yeah, you know, I made it to America. I got a job in the shipyard. It's great I'm making you know 50 bucks a month and then they're like oh 50 bucks a month Yeah, they get in their boat with their babies. Yeah, those those were wild people And like the Chinese right back of it. They had are three options I could do laundry right dynamite detail railroad right opium done restaurant restaurant I'm opium done yeah back in the day yeah you have the cool open dip yeah you're right with right I laid them down on a nice like you know mean felt [17:01] mattress you have cool like yeah great like'll yeah great light it yeah, yeah In their mouth light it for them. Yeah, right and then touch their head as they go Like in that movie once about a time in America Yeah, right the dareton era was like fucked up on oh, oh beates, but everybody got fucked up on it once you did it Yeah, they get fucked up. That's what's wild about social media social media is addictive and it doesn't even feel good Opium at least you feel great. Yeah, you feel great look at those dudes in opium Den. Oh my god mind would look so much better than that I had Peter Berg on you know Peter Berg did that you know He's amazing. He's done a million things. He's that guy's the shit, but he did That Netflix series pain killer the one on the Sackler family didn't see it and holy shit, dude I see I can't see opiore crisis, but he said he told me that he tried it once He said I, I tried oxycontin once, recreationally. He was like, oh my God, get this the fuck away from me. [18:08] He goes, he was great. It just makes you feel so good. That's the problem. That's the problem those goddamn things. Well, when I was on Matt TV and I relapsed, because at 13 years I got on Matt TV, all I got addicted to the Vic' it. And I was taking 30 or 40 a day. And when I got off of that shit, dude. Right? It was the worst detox I've ever fucking felt. And then I had to do a Connie Chung sketch on Mad. Two days into fucking detoxing, and I shit my pants on camera. And they didn't air it. Because you shit your pants? Yeah, like, good evening, I'm kinda play Connie Chung. Right? Right, Because you shit your pants. Yeah, I went good evening. I'm kind of play Connie Chong right right. I'm shaking Oh boy. Good evening. I'm con as I said Connie. I food and it's stockings and then I had a wardrobe white bed Oh, it was fucking terrible. It was fucking terrible. Oh boy And I got sober then but it's like yeah, if I get it an opiate to the worst what other job can you do that? And they're like just clean them up [19:08] McDonald's you're out you're out. Yeah. Yeah, you know, we try to finish you're for apple That's around yeah, yeah But even on stage in the genius bar you should be a pan that's a Bobby yeah no more Even on stage you like you can go to a guy and go fuck you yeah like in comedy like you don't get fired for that It's a fucking amazing. It's amazing. you did that like John but juice you're done right but the the I remember you tell me Tell me a story how you had been up all night and you you got back to mad TV how to get there for something for some Like was it a table read or what you had a giant knife on you? You're super parry on tweaking. Oh, yeah He said you were carrying like a bowie knife Yeah, bow and sometimes a cling on you want to know it's clean. That's got a love Star Trek. Yeah, that a cling on knife It will look perfect with it. It was right this long. I still have it by my back right that was taken right here Right and open Hawaiian shirt And I was breaking out and they yeah, that's what it looks like. That's what it looks like. I don't know what it looks like. [20:05] Yeah, yeah. That is actually pretty dope. That's what Klingon's we carry. Yeah. And then they would, uh, and they're crazy. They have spacious. So they still need knives. It seems so. Like you don't have a better, you're never thought of it that. Like, Kirk out, click. You have to hang out. Right. You have to hang out. You have to hang out. You have to hang out. You have to hang out. You have to hang out. Nothing. Yeah. But yet they could, back up. I'm sorry. You're wrong. You're not wrong. Can I just say something? I can't be wrong for liking something. I understand that. I think that you're misinformed. How so? Because, and do me a favor. Season five? [21:00] No. All right. Can I just do open your heart? It's open. Okay, so may I say what I'm gonna say right? May I yes, please all right season five okay second to the last episode okay the episode is called interlite I'm not gonna watch it. I'm not asking you to but I'm asking I'm not asking you to but But I'm asking your fans okay to check it out right? at yell at me that episode is the greatest piece of sci-fi ever filmed At Adam Eget Hate at Star Trek. I forced him to watch this episode. He watched every episode after that. Yeah, okay It's a great episode. Okay. I will watch it. Okay. Thank you. Now I change my mind a watch see your heart was open looks interesting Yeah, yeah, looks interesting because he's walking around So he's got to say yeah, maybe he's unlike a vision quest. No, the concept is great. Okay. Yeah, yeah I believe you okay good. Thank you I like the old one just for nostalgic purposes. Yeah, because I'm old and because when I was a kid that was on television [22:01] I remember watching Star Trek captain Kirk like, like, oh my god, he's the coolest. Yeah, it was the best. And it was also, it's so corny. Like if you watch it today, it's gone to this point where it becomes funny. It's parody. Like there's a scene where Captain Kirk has a fight with like a lizard man on a planet. Yeah, I've ever seen it. It's the dumbest fight scene ever. I know it's right up there With the sticks six million dollar man versus bigfoot. That's the dumbest one. Yeah, this one's pretty dumb. Yeah, look at him. He was so handsome. First of all This lizard is so goddamn slow. I will fuck this lizard up. I would fuck look at this. I would Up, dude. Yeah, I would fuck look at it. Look at him. Bro, I would fuck look at this bro. I would fuck him up. I'll be leg kicking him right now Wow, I take them knees out. Oh that would a shitty body kick wow And he fights like a fight like Brendan Shobba a little bit, but all he did is throw him Brendan Shobba's a good fighter. I'm getting a shout out knocked out Mercok. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I love him [23:02] So look at this he's right next to you and he's not even biting you. This is the biggest pussy lizard of all time. He's not even biting. Yeah. He's not biting. The man who's right there, he's got a giant mouth, filled with teeth. Easily he could bite. There's no restraint keeping him from biting. Yeah. Oh that was a good ear move. Captain Kirk, he hit him with the ears. Oh, he heard him with the ears. So what does he do? He runs away like a pussy. Now he's gonna throw rocks at him. Yeah. You gotta hit him in the ear, bro. Get close. The guy slow his fuck. Look at him. This is so dumb. This is so dumb. This is so dumb and it hurts my feelings. But imagine shooting that that day. It's so, oh my god. That guy in the lizard's head. Oh my god. He's sweating his dick. Yeah. Yeah. He's having it rough because that's probably Burbank or somewhere. Yeah. Those don't like that totally looks like he could be California, doesn't it? Yeah, they must have for it. Look, get out of the fucking way, bro. Oh, [24:11] that was good. How casual did he get out of the way? Because he knew it wasn't a real rock. Yeah. It was when we remember that guy threw the shoe at the bush. This is picture perfect terrible acting. Yeah. Picture perfect terrible choreography. Everything about it is hilarious. Does it end? Yeah. It doesn't kill him? You ran away. That's it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. How dumb? Throw the boulders out. I mean, I love that show. Yeah. It'll rise up to be of old Godzilla's. You remember when Captain Kirk hooked up with that green lady? It was a big Yeah I would have fucked the avatar ladies if you know I had a like an avatar ladies that ladies hot on Pandora I don't know looks blue the one I will give a fuck the one that he eventually Mines up with yeah, she's hot But you know how like the creatures connect with the tails were then to communicate yeah, does that come out of the vagina too? I don't think they have okay. Oh [25:07] I think you just link up like that. Oh you're on your own. Oh, yeah, I'd love to come in my nose How the babies even get there? I can't you know can I ask They don't have to I mean they have things over their dicks so they must have dicks right they all had loincloths Yeah, but I'm 52 to my night. I can't I can't I can't a calm can't? I come every other time. Every other time. That's good. But you know what? I like edging. But how much are you fucking? Are you trying to fuck every day? Or jerk off every day? Maybe you're running out of gizz. Maybe you just have a small factory. You know, and you're just demanding too much out of it. No, my factory's pretty big, though. Your Yeah, but like for normal humans when you hit 52 like how often are you coming? Every other day that's reasonable that's reasonable But when I'm in the sack with a woman. Oh psychologically. I can't do it. So do you just fake it? I know I make it I give the lights yeah, and I do it back. I go back you go back so just yeah [26:01] And I'm gonna back to the back of the wall good move in the dark or enacted out I go, oh, and I'm going to back to the back of the wall. Good move. In the dark or in the act it out. Fag, I'm going to go to the actor, right? I pull up C. Right, right, C. And then go straight to the bathroom, like I'm washing it. Whoa. So they can't see the calm. That's a good move. Thank you. It's a good move you want to be deceptive. see people about whether or not you come. Yeah, I mean, but I feel like all guilty of it. Yeah, but I don't want them to feel bad, like they're not hot. It has nothing to do with them. I get it. I'm just being like a nice guy. I'm just like a person. Yeah, I'm so sweet to you. I'm super sensitive. But it's like, because I was in a 10 Yeah, you're having a good time, Bobby I am as long as you're enjoying life That's what you should be doing. You should be enjoying life. You know Joe wait where sir? Yes, I am That's beautiful because when you weren't enjoying life, it bothered me It bothered me because I love you and like you're such a nice guy and you get weirded out by so many different things [27:05] And like what like like what I would you you were just always paranoid that people didn't like you and you're you know You're always weirded out by stuff Well even me and you like we hadn't seen each other for six months like just to like me. I'm like I love you Any talking about give me a hug Because we have history yeah, but a history is all beautiful. It's a beautiful history We have history of we've never been in argument. No, we've never yelled at each other. We've always had good times. We've had a lot of laughs. We had some great laughs. Oh my God, we had laughs. Oh my God. We've had moments where I even recall that you probably don't even remember. Like one time you and I were at the comedy store. We're in the patio and Eddie Griffin bumped us. Right? And we were talking shit. So this must be early days. Early days. Back in the 90s, right? 90s, right? Wow. And then I remember there was a black guy near us listening and he told Eddie Griffin that we were talking shit about him and he confronted us. Yeah, I remember that. And we were like, fuck off, Iron Man. But it was like, because you know what, he used to do hours. Yeah, well he would do three hours. He would go on at nine o'clock and your spot would be at 915 and he would do three hours. He was him [28:08] dice would do it sometimes Men see a man see it would do it all my god. Yeah, but it was the thing is it was the kind of the culture of the comic store in Eddie's defense is that if you reach a certain level of fame and at the time Eddie was definitely more famous than us and a fame and at the time Eddie was definitely more famous than us and he was when I'd still to this day maintained that Eddie Griffin set on deaf jam was one of the best fucking I don't know was 10 minutes 15 minutes whatever he did it was one of the best sets I've ever seen he had shorts on remember yeah and he has so much energy man I remember why I pretty sure I was in New York at the time when I watched it. I was like, God damn, this fucking dude is talented. Yeah, I'm not questioning his skill set. But it's the culture thing. This is what I was gonna say. There was a thing at the store when you reach a certain level of prominence, you were allowed to just do whatever the fuck you wanted. [29:01] And people would show up and apparently can't see me used to do that a lot of guys used to do that but do hours I get it man I don't I don't agree with it you wouldn't do it no, but there's certain guys did you certain guys that are really good did Chappelle did it there's a bunch of guys who did it it was a thing that you allowed to do there You know what I'm saying and it was like I don't I think we probably all should have talked about it Yeah, and said it is kind of crazy. Yeah. But I still to this day went to Emily and I go give me a list right now of the people that are allowed to bump me. Right. Right. She goes, I'll get back to you. Nobody should be allowed to bump you. If someone wants to do a set, if a famous person is in town, they should ask you if it's okay. That's how I feel. I never bump anybody. I don't do it. I don't do it. No, I know, but it's a thing that was the comedy stores like Mark that you had made to a certain level. If you could show up and some guys would try to get it, they would try to bump people and like, you're nobody. [30:01] I guess some people are crazy. Crazy, crazy. Deligional. Yeah, they're like a YouTube person or someone who's on some show, literally. Someone who's on some show that you've never heard of. That was on like the WB or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What are you talking about? There's a few guys that like wanted to try that juice before because it was that thing. Like when someone would show up, whoever it was. Some Chris Rock would show up. He would just go on stage. That's it. Chris Rock goes on stage. But he's on the list. I have a list of people that are allowed to. Yeah, you're on the list. Okay. You wouldn't do it, but you're on it. Yeah, I don't do it. Yeah, Chris Rock's on the list. Chappelle's a weird thing. It's like you're trying to appease the talent. You never know who's really going to make it big and you don't want to piss them off now. I'm so glad I don't have to deal with that. I know. I was told people be nice to comic club owners because you don't want to be one. That was my advice always to comics because they always get mad at comic club owners. I go, listen man, you do not want to be one of these people and we fucking need them. This is a crazy job. You're dealing [31:08] with maniacs that may or may not take their flight. Might show up drunk. Might get arrested Friday night after the first show. Imagine you're feeding your family based on these fucking maniacs that I'm having. I know. I know. I mean, these people are regular people. I would go to comedy clubs and I would look at the often see the calendar and it would always say, it would always say Pablo Francisco with a question mark. Oh yeah, Pablo was around. Yeah, yeah, so it's like I get it. Yeah, with Pablo's fucking insanely talented. He's so talented. Oh my God. Pablo goes to the basement. He gets in there. He goes and looks around those dark corners son. You know I he goes out there. He goes into the tunnel And I've you know I just feel so sad about it, but he could have been the biggest thing He should have been yeah, he should have been that's how tell should have been huge in the 90s Oh my god, my gosh, Crusher Destroyer and so fun to be around yeah, sweetheart of a guy like a good just nobody hated Pablo [32:10] Sweetheart of a sweetheart every time people around him you want to hug him. Yeah, but he had that skill set on stage That was like a combination between impressions and act out and he had everything and funny jokes Yeah, funny jokes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, all of it all of it together and just so likable. So like great Sesame-nice guy. Yeah, yeah, but yeah, it's I see that still to this day It's a nice guy. Yeah, yeah. Like it made me feel encouraged just foolish. You're so vulnerable. Yeah. Life is vulnerable. You just, and it made me appreciate people more. Like legitimately. When you, when you're, do you perform when you're high sometimes? All the time. All right, do you ever lose your place or no? No, that's what I found a lot of neutropics. That's one of the keys. Could I have one? Yeah. You take four of those. That's alpha brain black label. That stuff is the shit. [33:07] I've always, whenever I say a show on your online, I always want to try your little things. And that's a good one to try. And this is, you know, I'm affiliated with this company obviously, but it's just not the only one that I try. I'll tell people about some stuff that I have no affiliation with neurogum is one of them. We always keep neurogum in the studio. Can I have a packet of neurogum when I leave? We can get one right now. Yeah, yeah, but I can't choose. You can get one on the mic, it's on the phone. I'm not gonna do it. I'll do it later. We'll get some more, we'll probably run and dry. We go through four or five fucking It's got theaning in it and caffeine and a couple other things and what it does is it enhances your memory It enhances your your brain's ability to form sentences and wall yeah Well without a brain we did two double blind placebo controlled studies at the Boston Center for memory memory and it showed Increasing alpha flow state it showed [34:01] Increasing verbal memory increase in I think it was a reaction time It showed increase in verbal memory, increase in, I think it was a reaction time, but it does something. And we did it at a dose that's half of what I take. I take four, sometimes I take six. If I'm feeling pressurey. I keep dealing with it. If I'm talking to a scientist. Does it hit right away or no? No. No, it's okay. If I'm talking to a scientist, I'll take a share load of them. I'll take six. Like Lex. Yeah, yeah. I love that guy. He's awesome. He's awesome. But it being any scientist, like any time we're talking to, someone who's like explaining to me some very complicated things about the universe. Yeah. Like I don't want any fogginess. I want to be like locked in. See that was one of my fears of junior show. This science and the things that you do that talk about. I know, I'm just saying. I was like, I don't know nothing about anything. You don't have to. Okay. No, no, no, no, no. I know film. I know some film. You're my friend and we have had conversations thousands of times. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is you and I having a conversation. Yeah. Do you remember when we first met remember first met the strip of the city? Yeah Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Yes, right and I think Diaz was Diaz was there. I believe so yeah, I think it was there right I knew Diaz [35:26] Right, so he goes hey, let's go to the strip club with Joe and I I was like I was trying to be a host Was this 95 yeah 95 96 okay, right? Wow, and I was a kid right? I was enamored by you You know, I mean not enamored but I was like I wasn't even famous back then. No but still you were a headliner, I was at MC. Right, right, right. So then we go to the strip club. Okay. And it's deja vu. Okay. Okay. Okay. And I wanted to go like, I'm from San Diego, I know the ropes. I know the people. I didn't. Okay. Of course I don't know what the [36:07] problem was that there was a problem between I'll tell you the problem. Okay. Okay. There's one of the gang members was dating one of the strippers. Okay. And when he was over there talking to the stripper, you went over and tried to get the stripper to give you a lap dance. And when you did that, I saw the look in his eyes and he had I'll never forget he had long straight black hair Yeah, this Mexican dude with tattoos on his face in 95 Toot here drops. That's fine. Okay. That's only two people. He killed okay, and this is 95 okay, and You went over and I said Bobby what the fuck are you doing with the fuck you doing? I go did you take a look at that guy's eyes? Yeah, I go, Bobby, these are like dangerous real people. And you're like, oh shut the fuck up. This nothing's gonna happen. They ain't gonna do shit. I go, okay, I'm outta here. So I said, I'm leaving. You get either come with me or not. And I got up and left the door and you barely got in my car. You barely got in my car in time. [37:06] You were dilly dally in and someone had a yell at you and then we got you in the car and we took off. I mean, Bobby, you were gonna get a shot. Like, for real. When you say it in my life, I don't know if I saved your life, but I definitely saved you in that case. But also, if she's working there, she's on the clock. No, just hear me out. No, you're, if I make McDonald's right, and some womanically correct. I'm technically correct. Technically you're correct. Ethically correct. But she was over there talking to a gang member boyfriend and you went over asking for a lap dance and you just like stormed your way into their conversation. You were gonna die. Can I say something? Yes please. I wanna say something, okay. At the time, I found this out later, I thought the tear drops meant that he was emotional or something, I didn't know about death. Okay. Even if he didn't have tear drops in his face. Yeah. The look in that guy's eyes, like the whole group of them, they were serious people. I don't wanna make assumptions about people. Okay. [38:06] Do you have any self-preservation instincts? Whatever. What do you mean? Did you have any self-preservation instincts? Why is that the self-perves? We don't know what danger that way. We had no homeless. We had surfers. You should just inherently like a child sees a dog's teeth and is scared of them. You could see that guy. Yeah, yeah. Grouling and go, okay, this is real. Joe, I'm 52 now. I've never had anything happen to me. So I feel like my instincts right are on the on point You're also very likable. I'm like I'm all decided not to kill you smile. Yeah, so what the fuck dog? I go yeah, yeah That's a good move. That's a good. Yeah, yeah, but that that was our introduction. That's how we became friends It didn't right right fuck up our relationship. It's a fucking No, I came to LA and then I think that would grew what year did you come to LA 97 or 98 like in that time period I was a little weird time at the store that was huh the dark ages was weird But it was really good for us. Yeah, as you would go on stage in the OR and it'd be half full and it was like a real good place to fuck around and practice. [39:06] Oh, so the people that did it really did it because there was no light at the end of the tunnel? Not anymore. I think the store goes through Errors and it had gone through the Kines in Error and when Kines and Died I think there was a big drop off. It was terrible times. Dude, dude. At a saturday night in the OR. They couldn't start the show without four people living in the audience and there would be sometimes no shout. Yeah. On a Saturday fucking night. Yeah, it was crazy. It was crazy, dude. But then it came back. It came back when the internet came around. It came back and like in the early 2000s. Yeah. Yeah. And then we, I reaped the reward. I'm so glad you didn't quit too. Yeah, I saw dude. I saw some great I saw one time at two in the morning. I was working the door there Yeah, and I saw people in purple robes. Oh go up into the belly room. Oh, oh with candles. Oh Jesus right So now you know you can sneak up to the belly room through the green room. Mm-hmm those offices and stuff right where they supposed to be up there. Yeah, oh [40:05] I'm not lying. This is the 90s? Yeah. Okay. Right. I peek through. They formed a circle and it candles up. What? No, no, no, no, no, no, baby eating. Okay. Anyway, I don't have to report that. Okay. And they were doing say- on's Andy Kaufman's ghost oh and when I went back downstairs the people that went with the robes they came back down and they were in the regular clothes Lily Tomlin Bob Samuda whoa I saw it with my own eyes whoa it was fucking crazy whoa yeah well why not you know yeah you get a little high someone I sought with my own eyes. Whoa. It was fucking crazy. Whoa. Yeah. Well, why not? You know? Yeah. You get a little high. Someone goes, oh my god. Yeah, yeah. Why do we have to wear the ropes? Because it'd be fun. And then you get a little, right, right, right, right. It sounds like something me and Duncan would do. Yeah. Nice ropes, probably, too I'm wearing some bullshit robe. Yeah, yeah. But have some respect. So, to get a dunk in, when I got sober, [41:07] when I had that 17 years chunk, and anyone out there listening, right? I needed to get all my drugs out of my house. So, he was the only one I wanted. I, he was the only one that could do it. So, when I called him, he came under my house in five minutes. He cleaned out my apartment in like 20 minutes and then he made me a fish dinner. Aww. And that he took all my drugs and went away, but I want to dunk it if you're listening. Thank you for that. He's the best. Yeah. We lived together once for a while. He, where? In my house. You're in six months. You know, I'm still for you. Oh, really? Yeah. Wow. He got kicked out He was or the house he was dating this lady and she got tired of him playing video games all day Really he calls me because dude, I don't know what to do. I'm in a hotel. She kicked me out ago come live with me Yeah, I get this big-ass house. Yeah, so Duncan lived with me for like six months And that was I had a sensory deprivation tank in the basement. I saw that yeah, I could get Duncan would go down the basement [42:01] in the basement. I saw that. Yeah, it was a joke. Duncan would go down the basement, trip balls, and sort his life out. Was he messy? No, no. Duncan was a great roommate. Really? He was awesome. Did you have to kick him out or no? No, no, no. He eventually got back on his feet again. And we had a great time. Like he had his stay there for years. We had a wonderful time. He was a lot of fun. Wow. It was like Duncan's one of my best friends. So like having one of my best friends in my house in the house is big. So it's not like we were on top of each other. I could be way the fuck. The phone didn't even work in the whole house. I have to transfer phones to go to other parts of the house. So if Duncan's over in that side, I'm on over in this side, we're not even in each other's hair. Didn't even bother each other. So it was really cool, man. It was cool having meals with them, hanging out with them. So for like six months, we were roommates. And to think that he was not even a stand-up at mobile, he was a talent coordinator. Well, he was a stand-up. He was trying to do stand-up when he was a talent coordinator friends because I would call up and give my veils and then we would have crazy conversations. [43:05] Like, you know, he was like, did you see this thing with Ram Das and you were like, and we would talk about like UFOs, big foot, that's why when that Joe Rogan questions everything, so that's why I did it with him. I was the perfect guy, and Ari too. Ari did some of the episodes. Wow. But like, you know, Duncan was always trying to do stand up. He was just, you know, he was just unorthodox, you know. He had a approach. But then he got good. Oh, he's like, he's fucking dull. Oh my god. Little hobo was one of the best sets, one of the best bits I've ever seen. It was so good. It's so good. Yeah, you get it the other night at the mother shit. Oh, dude. Yeah. Yeah, it's incredible Yeah, he's got a new little hobo too somebody stole little hobo. No, yeah some piece of shit Big head hobo was like an antique doll, dude, right? Yeah, so how what do you fuck? I don't know I don't remember how someone stole it. No, but where do you get another little hobo? Oh, you go on eBay Oh, you can get little hobos on the yeah, the new one he's got is creepy. It's fuck oh really I want to get a little hobo Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can go online and get antique puppets [44:10] Really yeah, yeah, yeah, thousands of dollars probably I don't know. Yeah, like there's there it is Oh my god, he's cute He's fucking creepy he lives here now, right? Yeah, don't dunk lips here. Everyone's asking me to come You should come I know you're talking shit about moving to Austin, but listen He's fucking creepy. He lives here now, right? Yeah, Duncan lives here. Everyone's asking me to come. You should come. I know you were talking shit about moving to Austin, but listen. No, no, yeah, you did. I watched the video. No, I didn't. Don't lie. You did. You did. What did I say? I'm not fucking moving to Austin. I don't leave my neighborhood. something what you know what man you know what man you know what man what listen you have to understand what you guys did what did we do you guys took half of the talent out yeah so I was just but hurt we brought another bunch into like Shane Gillis lives here I know I know we don't know great I know you [45:04] guys are killing it we're having a club last night come move. I know. I know he does not. We're doing great. I know you guys are killing it. We're having a lot of fun. I wish the club was not. Come move here. You're more than Paul's thinking about it. Paul's here a lot. And then Paul's just here. The other thing. The other thing about it. Right. You're all just worried that people say, oh, you move there I don't ask I wouldn't do it if you did it with your problem. Yeah, I'd be like why are you doing this? I'd have to be asleep me. Oh If you okay, we were camping if I woke up and you were sucking I heard you what I would yell at you like you yeah, I'd be like what the fuck dude. You felt good I was in the middle of a dream. We're fuzz in the middle of a sex. Yeah, yeah, I'll be so mindful to. That would be a real problem for the rest of my life. Right the hardest I ever came I would have slept and yeah, I'm a sex dream. Yeah, I believe it's sucking my nuts. I don't know why he's doing it It was just for fun. He didn't know I've sucked nuts before but like you know I get yeah, but um [46:01] Yeah, I'm gonna be in Santino will maybe think talk. Listen, man, it's a great place to live. It's a great place to tax wise, it's a great place to traffic wise. It's a great place. The most important thing is people wise. The people here are so friendly. Austin people are great people. They're really nice. They're nice. They're not shit heads. They're not Hollywood people. They're not lost in this fake world of leftist ideology that everybody's trapped in. They're just people, they're just regular people, man. And those people exist outside of these blue bubbles where everyone's gone insane. Why used to be a part of the blue bubble? I was 100% a left-leaning person who lived in Los Angeles. I was 100%. I never voted Republican my whole life. I was very left-leaning leaning especially with like any social issues When it comes to financial things I'm a little bit more Conservative but at the end of the day way more left than I am right but California went nuts man It's gone like full communist. It's out of its fucking mind and their approach to law enforcement is so insane [47:06] It's so insane the no cash bail the letting people out for committing violent crimes the fucking Not stopping people for stealing up to whatever money is was at $900 now I think they raised it. I think they made it a little higher San Francisco is non-existent San Francisco most of San Francisco is emptied out of big chain stores and big department stores. I wouldn't even do stand-up there anymore. It's crazy. They ruined it. They ruined the city. You can bring it back. The structure's still there. You have to have some hardcore Rudy Giuliani type mother fucker to come in there and knock at. And nobody wants that. Nobody wants that. They're peace love and granola and fucking wear a mask. I'm in the middle now. I'm in the middle. I'm in the middle. I never thought I would ever. Never. Never. It only happened to the last year. Right. I just went, I can't do it anymore. You know what people that you thought were aligned with you are like now like mad at you about shit. They're in a cult. [48:05] They're in a cult. It's got all, I mean, Mark Andreessen, who's a brilliant venture capitalist guy, explained it to me in very clear terms. Like what the definition of a cult is, how you can get excommunicated, how you get shamed for having differing opinions, the group thing, the whole, he's like, it's a cult, and he's right. He's 100% right. It's just hard to say because then people in the cult will attack you. But they're not attacking you for a reasonable, it's not logical, the way they're attacking you. They're attacking like some of the attacks religious beliefs. And some of these religious beliefs, so it gets into these weird gray areas, like trans people in women's bathrooms like Says who you says who how do you know that's a real trans person? How do you not know that's a fucking creep? They don't want to pull his dick out in front of kids. Yes. Those are real We see yeah, and if all you that guy was a convicted [49:02] Sex offent yeah, yeah. And he was doing that. Look, those guys are real. It doesn't mean trans people aren't real also, but those guys are fucking real. And to even say that those guys are real, you get excommunicated. You get treated like you're a Nazi. I never even cared about it. Didn't care at all. Yeah, I mean, I would have rew are, I'll give a shit. You're a man, but it's like, I can't do it anymore. I think it's engineered. A really good. By China and by Russia. Oh, no, Chinese. Yeah, I think what they're doing by manipulating social media, manipulating algorithms, I think some of it is natural. Don't get me wrong. I think some of it would have happened either way. It happened during the 70s with the hippie movement. There's always like, there's always these people that are, they want to live completely outside of the norm of conformity of society. And there's always people like that. But what's going on now is very different and it's accentuated by social media. [50:01] And I think it's accentuated by algorithms naturally because people aren't inclined to go towards things that upset them, but also it's done purposely. And I think it's done if you have enough stuff about like whatever the thing is, whether it's Black Lives Matter or whether it's Ukraine or whether it's Palestine from the River to the Sea, if you have enough of that online, it moves the needle. And the way I describe it the other day, it's like if two ships are going in a certain direction. This is a ship where people logically work through things. And this is a ship that's adjusted by the algorithm, affected by the algorithm. It just moves that much. Over time, this is what we're seeing. So over time, you and I, who used to be on the left are now like where's the left where are you guys are so I can't even see you yeah you ready your mind you're you're you're fucking chopping Dix off and Kids yeah warm-on blockers you have no idea what the long-term consequences are you ignoring the health risks [51:00] You won't even talk about the health risks. Yeah, you use things like Gender affirming care. What are you saying? What are you saying when you're talking about children? Why are you just accepting this? Cause it's a noble thing to blurt out. So everybody goes, you're on the right team. That's what it is. It's not like, oh my God, what are we doing to kids? It's not like, oh my God, what are we doing to San Francisco? It's not like, oh my God, why are we letting these violent criminals out of jail? Oh my God, why are we defunding the fucking police? What are you doing? Yeah, you can't say any of those things. Is there any of those things you're not in? Yeah, are you getting nervous? No. Okay. I live here. Right 99% of the people agree with me. Even the left-leaning people here are way more reasonable. Even last night, there's a joke that I tell that if I say it in a liberal city, it dies. You know, and it's a joke about, you know, I mean, Down syndrome people making love and they make up their own moves. Right? And they have, they don't try. [52:02] And I did it last night at Crossed Ball shows. And I felt like, oh, this is, you know what I mean? I think maybe looking for. Well, that club is specifically designed and nurtured just for what's funny. That's it. There is no message here unless you have a message and it's funny and it's in there. You wanna do it? That's fine. But what's valued is comedy. Just like if you go to a music show, you don't want those in between the music speeches about climate change. Shut the fuck up, shut the fuck up and play the song. Entertain me. We want to develop stand-up comedy, like real stand-up comedy, because I think it's a worthy art form. I think it's very valuable to people in terms of enjoyment and in terms of mental health and in terms of society. It's an important part of society. Like the Lakota had a person in their tribe that was called the Hayoka and Hayoka was the sacred clown and that this was the person that made fun of everything because if you couldn't [53:04] make fun of something, it was bullshit. Like if this is one guy, oh, you can't make fun of him. Well, that's probably bullshit. He probably has a, an appropriate amount, an inappropriate amount of power, a disproportionate amount of influence. It's like probably some ego going on here too, if you can't make fun of something. Because if you can make fun of something and it's not funny, then you're not funny. But if you can make fun of something and it's funny and people laugh and someone gets mad, they're the problem. Yeah, they're the problem. And I want to say something, I never said this before, I would have said no. Right? Is just for my personal life, some of the bullying that I received was necessary for me to get to where I am now. Well, you don't want it. I don't want it. No, I didn't ever want it. I don't want it. But I wouldn't like go back in my past and change anything. Right. I wouldn't either. Yeah, yeah. Because I feel like everything, my dad was fucking violent as fucked in. Like he would knock my mom's tooth out. She has a missing tooth right here. You know all this trauma, right? And he was like, dude, it was like, it was fucking terrible. [54:07] I had done EMDR on just him, trauma therapy, right? And it's like, and then, you know, I was a little guy in an American high school and people would bully me. I lived in Minnesota, I thought I was an Eskimo, they threw ice chunks at my head, crows, but anyway, my point is is that all those little things, and even in comedy, it was hard being me, this little guy, you know what I mean, doing it. People, your comics would, black comics would sometimes come back to me. Asians aren't funny. You know what I mean? Well, there was always that knock on Asians. Let's be honest, like Henry Cho was like the first guy that went mainstream. I love him. He was the first guy that went mainstream. I love him. Wasn't he? Yes. Ronnie Chang's fucking hilarious. I love Ronnie. That dude is so good. So funny. He's got so much attitude on stage. Johnny Yuen was before him. That's right. Johnny Yuen. He's funny too? Yeah, he's very funny. But there was a that when you saw you on stage like you're you're a really funny guy [55:06] You're very good. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You're very good comment Yeah, and I also want to tell you the reason why I didn't want to do this now It because I'm doing a smash all and I want to promote it okay And I thought maybe I could only do it once every five years But then your people said that I could do it when I... You could do this and tell me what? Okay, I feel that now. You have my number. I'm going to call you. I'm going to text you. I'm going to call you. It's going to be great. Listen. I love you too. I love you too. Yeah, I get it. All right. Yeah, yeah, but yeah, I was like I have to do one I have to do a special And the reason it's also forced you to write more and fuck around more and but you need a place to do that And that's why you should move here. Well, that's why I'm gonna so much stage time here, dude That's why in March I talked to Adam. I'm gonna do Shows here in the little room to do probably a new joke night Let's go, but yeah, yeah, and then me and Adam are gonna do a pop-up-lead new joke night. Let's go, bubbly-lead, let's go. And then me and Adam are gonna do a Star Trek podcast. [56:07] Oh boy. And at that point, you're gonna watch the interlite. That's a big ask. You gotta ask. It's 40 minutes. You really think that's the best science fiction ever. Better than Alien, the first Alien movie. It's a Gourney Weaver. But you have to think though that it, you know, because obviously the budget is an alien budget, right? So it's cheesy television, right? But the concept, you know what I mean, was mind blowing at the time. When I saw that in my early 20s, it blew my fucking mind. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And it's like, I don't wanna give it away now, you know what I mean? Maybe I could kind of try to sell it to you real quick or no. No. Why not? I'm sure it's okay. Yeah All right, I wasn't bet you're gonna watch it. I'll watch that one episode that you told me thank you Thank you. Thank you. And then make fun of me about it. I will yeah most certainly but you also that's not the best That's crazy if you Google if you Google the best television sci-fi episode It's thelite is in the top three. You know it's a super underrated television sci-fi show? [57:07] What? Battlestar Galactica. The new version? So good! So good. I've seen it twice already all the way incredible. It's incredible, though. It's a really good show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like you think of it as a science fiction show, but it good like psychology show. It's like the way they had it set up, it's fucking terrifying. I just got goosebumps when you said it. It's so good and it's so appropriate to watch today. And because jumping every hour because they're so scared, oh my god, it was so good. And also the combination of artificial people and real people. Oh my god. It's really because that's something that we're going to have to navigate. They didn't have AI then, they didn't have that aspect of it. It worked out. You know, there wasn't like a terrifying force that they were dealing with as well. But the sylons were awesome. The robot murderers. Yeah. Oh my god, they're a crime. And they also kept some of the old school sylons or two. But the new school was where like you couldn't tell. [58:01] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, there was new school silence. Yeah, that's a great fucking show. I can't believe I'll grind it And you know, I love it. What's the pop pop face guy with it? Oh Shit almost And we're James Olmos. Yeah, yeah, so good and that yeah, it's amazing. Yeah, it's a great fucking show like great acting Great stories great special effects. It really flew under the radar radar I think it was on like FX or something like that sci-fi channel sci-fi channel was so people like not enough people were on that channel but now you know that I saw it right I'm telling you the interlite rivals in rivals okay that's what you'll watch it and go okay that's like the same kind of feel rise rivals is reasonable Yeah, what's your favorite sci-fi movie? Oh, shit in terms of like entertainment My favorite sci-fi aliens is one of the original alien was good. Yeah, because you know a heredine statin It was granted on my the cat. You know what I loved about it the cast was so believable [59:04] Oh, yeah. Yeah. And that was also the first time there was like a female action star that you didn't feel like they were shoe-horning it in your face that she's female. She was stuck in that role. That's not the role she wanted. You know, she wasn't some like badass. Yeah. She was someone rising to the occasion, becoming a badass in the face of this horrific thing that killed everybody else on her spaceship, spoiler. It's like 70. They also felt like real truckers, almost like. The ship lived in, right? Orally, almost, yeah. Yeah, it was a fucking amazing. It's a great movie. But aliens too, not as good. Not as good, but still entertaining. Different kind of movie that was like the aliens were easy to kill all of a sudden and there was like a lot of them all right yeah well the Marines oh yeah but it doesn't matter though the aliens were so the alien the first one was so clever and so fast and so sneaky yeah yeah and then all of a sudden they're not all of a sudden [1:00:00] they're just fucking idiots and just running out you like like the the British with the fucking white, rocks on their chest, target, like. Didn't make any sense. Their characteristics were completely different. They were the dumb aliens. And then the big one, the big female, the mama, the queen. That was fun. She should have fucked Sigordi Weaver up like that. It didn't make any sense. Okay. With that stupid bitch. With a robot thing. Like your whole body's exposed. Not your dad. Yeah. You're talking about it. Okay, okay. And why is it moving so slow? All the above. It should have been. Well, she's got babies in her belly. Oh yeah. You ever see a praying mantis is like the human or the earth like equivalent of what one of those alien things are. The alien things are an enormous praying mantis, probably even more violent and more deadly and I just don't buy Sigorn Ywievele, the stupid fucking robot crane suit on kick him to ask. Does it make me a pussy [1:01:02] when I watch Planet Earth and I see a lion chase a gazelle or whatever and I fast forward? No, you just don't want to see this suffering. I don't want to see it. But does that make me weak though? No, no It's not weak. You just don't want to experience it. Yeah, I don't want to experience that you know what it is You've seen it before I've seen it happen. You don't have to see a lion eating a fucking gazelle guts first Over and over and over again or hyenas. The hyenas ones are the wild dog ones. Those are the ruthless ones. Because they're pulling the guts out while things are trying to stand up. It's good. It's good. Fuck man. At least the lions kill you first. Lion, the cats always kill you. They don't just eat you. Cats grab you by the neck and they fucking kill you. Wow. But dogs, wild dogs and hyenas and bears, they just start eating you. And then the alligator you have to do a twirl with them. Yeah, you might not die for an hour. You might be the alligator? But a lot of different creatures. Well, really? Depends on what, well, alligators will take you underwater. They'll drown you because they want to, they want to stuff you into a log so you can rot. It's easier to consume. [1:02:05] What animal could I think I can survive, you think? A mouse, maybe. Oh, maybe. No, a really angry mouse. You'd probably run into a wall. Well, with a bear, maybe. You don't think so? A bear. Yeah, but I would just not freeze. I don't think that works. Freezing doesn't work. Depends on why they're there. All right. If they're there to eat you, no, that's not gonna work. Right. If they're there to scare you away from their children, maybe, maybe, or work. But do you know what to do? No, there's no one what to do. There's not a lot to do. You don't splash here by that kid that was just in the shark tank was in the Bahamas a bit They they they had some shark tank experience and some kid got bit by a shark Some kid I think from Maryland really yeah, don't fuck around man. They don't know that it's a shark tank They just they're sharks they're sharks Yeah, and a bear is like to think you know what to do maybe [1:03:04] Maybe if you spray it with pepper spray to run away, maybe, maybe it won't. Maybe if you shoot it, you'll stop it in its tracks or maybe you only have like a nine millimeter and you could pump it full four, five, six holes and it still tears you apart. Wow. Yeah, if you're gonna shoot it with a gun, you want a large caliber rifle. You want like a 300-inch mag. You want something big, something boom, boom. Put large holes in that gigantic monster predator. What about sword? No. No, you're fucked. I got fucked. No, no, no, no, no. Go, go, go, go, go. That one swing will, okay. You'll fucking bounce it off its nose and just get it out of here. Yeah, yeah. You'll miss, you'll panic. It's just hard. The speed that it moves at will astound all your senses. You'll panic because you'll realize you don't have the reaction time. You don't have the physical movement time capable of dealing with how fast it's coming at you. Your body doesn't work good enough to do that. I would run toward it and just get it over with. [1:04:05] That might work. I'll just jump right into the head maybe. It depends on where bites you. The thing about those things is they don't necessarily kill. They just hold down and eat. They just hold you down and start eating. All right, okay! You know, Grizzly Man, that document is... I guess I, yeah, yeah. That video with the lens cap was on but they have an audio of him dying. It's like it's so horrifying I know it's like five minutes long Yeah, five minutes of that thing eating him alive Five minutes is so long before you're dead. Yeah, you gotta think of how long it is is something just Ways a thousand pounds putting its paw on your chest and just pulling your guts out Screaming A thousand pounds putting its paw on your chest and just pulling your guts out screaming I bought I've found for five minutes and that seems like 20 minutes. Imagine getting eating. Oh my god Forever. Oh my god. Do you bomb anymore? I'll bomb a joker bomb. Yeah, yeah, we also do bottom of the barrel You know bottom of the barrel is like one of those shows where the audience has suggestions and you're reaching the barrel and pull out the suggestions [1:05:04] And then you just riff, I bomb the no-shows. Oh really? And sometimes there's no suggestion. Sometimes it's like green sneakers. Oh my God. It's so hard. The fuck am I going to do with this? Yeah. Sometimes people are trying to trip you up. Sometimes people have good suggestions. Yeah. Some of them are actually like almost in the form of jokes like someone really funny. Wow Yeah, so they use randomly pull out a lot of And the audience fills it out exactly. Wow, and it's like sometimes it's an amazing premise factory because sometimes because you're on the spot like that Every now and then an idea will pop in your head. You're like, oh shit. That's a bit Yeah, and then that bit you get home and you listen to it and you write it down Like there's three or four bits that I've gotten that are actual bits now because of that show. I want to admit to something to you right now if I may I do I want to admit to something to you right now if I may okay the reason why I haven't done a special is because of the fear of doing new shit. Yeah, of course. [1:06:06] Of course. But it's shameful. I get, yeah, but this idea that you have of a Bobby Lee new joke night. That's perfect. I'm forcing myself to do it. Perfect. Perfect. Because, you know, when you guys left the store and I don't want to make fun of, I love all the comics, dude, but it's like, you know, sometimes when the headlines are like, the guys with names leave town for the weekends, you look some of the lineups there, you know what I mean? And so when I'm, they're not as strong. So when I'm in town, I'm in the main room, I have the private spot, it's packed. I have this fucking pressure to crush. Of course. You know, because I just know that they're there to see me and I want to give them a good show. Well, you could do sets other places too, you know. Do sets other places. Go to the, fuck around with their ice house. Go to flappers. Go fuck around in other spots. Flappers? Yeah. I know you're saying that, but it's like, yeah, go up there. [1:07:01] It's a crowd. Yeah. You know, fuck the bird. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You got to kind of fuck around. You got to, you got to, like, come up with ideas and sit down, like, like, last night, I was, I told myself, I'm going to go to bed early. I was in front of the computer at 10 o'clock and I was like, I'll stop at 12 and I'll go to bed. But I caught an idea. I caught an idea and I wrote it out till like 3.30 in the morning. I was just writing. Wow. And when I do that, I'm like, okay, that was productive. Even though I'm tired and I woke up late today, even though I'm tired, I'm like, but that was productive. Wow. And if I, I'll just sit in front of that fucking computer and it's just nonsense. It's just nonsense. It's nothing, it's embarrassing, it's terrible. So there's nothing to this. I'm trying to work it out. You know, I'll find a take a little of that, go over it again. But when you sometimes nothing, sometimes I've got nothing. But when you write something though, and you look at it, right? Do you go, okay, this is like a 60%. Like, do that totally depends. [1:08:06] It depends. Sometimes it's like 100%. Some bits, like as I write them, that's exactly how I perform them. It's not normal, but it happens. Yeah. And then some bits are just seeds. It's just a seed. And I gotta throw that bitch on stage and see where it goes. And sometimes it doesn't go anywhere. Sometimes I think it's from like Ron White was telling the story the other day about this joke that he had that he thought was really funny. And he had planned, I had it planned in my mind when it was gonna be a plausible break. And he goes, he got fucking nothing. Yeah, yeah. That happens. Yeah, yeah, it does, yeah. But that's the and it's so exciting to get to it because it's like this bit is alive It's like it just it was just born. Yeah, it's just flexing, you know, it's fun. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's fine But it's it's also it's hard but you gotta you know you got to pay devotion to the muse to sit down and try to let the ideas come to you. [1:09:06] If you don't have a moment where you're just sitting down and just letting the ideas come to you, you're going to miss those ideas. And some people say, oh, I only ride on stage, I only ride with my friends. That's great. You should do that too. But there's nothing wrong with like sitting, it's not going to hurt you to sit in front of a computer and go over your ideas and every now and then maybe every two times or five times every ten times you sit in front of that computer or that notebook something pops up that wouldn't have popped up without it yeah and you got to like suffer through the ones that suck that drudge of not being able to come up with anything my problem is I do I have these second addictions I have, like video games. In your front of the computer, you start playing video games. Yeah, and I'll just start playing Starfield or something. 16 hours later, I'm on a planet, and I'm making an outpost, right? And I feel guilt, or I'll play Stardoe Valley [1:10:00] up create a farm. Yeah. And it's a haunting thing. Like, what the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? You're wasting your time. I'm wasting my time. I know this, but for some reason I can convince myself, well here's the thing. If you do the work first, like say if you sit down and you say, I can only play computer games if get to a thousand on a word document, you look at the bottom. It'll tell you how many words you've written and then you can stop. That's what I would do. Yeah, just earn it. Earn it. That way you'll actually enjoy it. That way when you're playing the games, they won't be in your head. Oh my god, I should be writing. That's what I should be doing, something else. And by the way, it doesn't have to be you write something funny. You could just write something about something and then try to extract funny things out of it. Like you could just write a story about how violent your dad was. Like that, what you just told me, which is horrific, right? If you wrote that out, I guarantee you, there's gonna be a seed of something in there, something. [1:11:04] It might not even be about your dad being violent. It may be about how you react to violence, or maybe how you react to angry people. I just want everybody to be nice. You could find a premise in there. So just write an essay. Just write an essay and write an essay with no expectation of whether or not it's gonna be funny. Yeah, I used to do morning pages. You ever do that? No, just get up in the morning and write. Write when you wake up, apparently when you just start writing. That's supposed to be the best time to write. Yeah. Well, you don't have those like filters and stuff like the sucks. Just freely write it and then just pages of it. Yeah. Completely a couple, you know what I mean? Maybe I'll start doing that again, I don't fucking know. That's how most writers do. When they write, they write in the morning, and then they go for a walk, a lot of them do, and they listen to some of their notes, and they'll go over the idea that they wrote down, and they'll take voice notes while they're walking. There's some about walking, they say, because it's like a very mild erode exercise so it stimulates your circulation and gets everything flowing. You actually think a little bit better when you're walking. [1:12:07] It's real, it's, you're not tired. It's a mild thing. So you just out there walking and your heart is pumping and you're not sitting there sedentary just trying to think. You're actually walking around. Okay, I'll try hiking done. Yeah, hiking is good. Yeah, yeah,ike after you, then you're really have earned your video games, right? Right. Yeah. And then hike and think about what you're right. And then when you play, you'll be playing for fun. You'll be enjoying it. So this day fourth, from this day fourth, I'm going to wake up. I'm making an announcement. I'm gonna wake up, I'm gonna write for an hour. Right? Hike, and then I'm gonna play video games. I'm gonna see you four months from now. You're gonna be cracked out with a cling on, nice. He went off the rails. He was too much pressure. He was getting up every morning, I was writing, and I was hiking, and it was just too much. Yeah. No, I'm my fish died. I have to do it because now it's incredible. Like, you know, when I do shows with Sagarra or me and Andrew, [1:13:07] you know, because I'm a podcast called Bad Friends. It's a funny podcast. Thank you. You guys are good together. I want to talk to you about an episode that I saw. But you, you haven't even go to Israel. Was that on that or was that somewhere else? It was out. What was that like? Tell me what happened. You not want to talk about it? I can do it. Because I'm not saying anything that's like wrong, it's just something that happened. So I get a call from Steve Byrne. Okay. And Steve goes, you want to go to Israel? How long goes this? 14 years ago maybe? Oh, okay. Yeah, okay. 12, 14, I don't know. And I go, why why I don't want to do a show there and he goes no You know, I got a call and he they're flying out a bunch of comedians and actors and it's a free trip And I go why I don't know they just want to show us the country and their culture and you get nice hotels [1:14:02] Freemials and you get a tour of like, are you not performing? No. Okay. So I went there with Jamie Chung, Brian Greenberg, their actors, and Steve Lopez went out, George Lopez. Okay. And we went out there, and then when we got there, they were like, welcome. We're like, thanks, and they're like, but every day you have to tweet how great Israel is. Every day. Yeah, like put out a tweet. They told you you have to, and they didn't say anything about that before you left. I don't remember them saying it before. But they might have. They could have. Where maybe they said it to Steve, and Steve conveniently left it out. I don't know, but I just, I do know that I fit I feel like if they did say it that I would have questioned it right you know, man Yeah, I don't know where so this is the early days of Twitter right yeah when was Twitter's only like 12 years old They was 10 years ago that I don't know how old Twitter Oh, there it is Israel unfiltered [1:15:01] So you two yeah, yeah look at that so what was that? Look at your face. Yeah like I have to tweet. Yeah, yeah, but here's what happened. As soon as I tweeted the first thing, I already knew like, oh my god, I think I'm in trouble. Why would you say? I just said, Israel's great, they're beautiful people, you know what I mean? Okay. And then like it would just like, and they flew us out here for free and then you would just get a thousand like, you know what I mean? That we're like, you know, Palestinian, you know, and go, you mother, you know, and just it was a negative, negative, negative. And there was these gigantic wars that would go on on the comment section. Oh boy. It's got really uncomfortable. And then I just remember you know, yeah, there I I get you nice hat Where that all time I look cute with it. Is that the famous wall? That's the wall. Yeah, would it feel like to be around that wall? The walls always fuck right? Yeah, I put a note in it. Wow. You could write little letter of [1:16:05] You know man letters to Jesus. Yeah, yeah, and I just you put it in there. You could write little letters. You know, man, letters to Jesus. Yeah, yeah. And I just put it in there. Jesus. I think I was like, let me get more pussy or whatever. But yeah, yeah, yeah. But like that wall, how old is that wall? 19 BC. 19 BC. Yeah. Wow. But then toward the end, I was just like, I got to get the fuck out of here. I think. Yeah. I was like, how many tweets did you make? you kept going after they were attacking you? Yeah I think so yeah. You have to. You have to. Why don't you get your hotel? Yeah. It was like a free hotel. And I didn't know this significance of it until later almost like you know I mean or a significance but like what the impact of it you know. Because I you know obviously you know I, obviously I have my opinions about it. You know what I mean? I'm keeping it to myself, but it's like, you know, it's not fully aligned with what people think that I should be. You have to be careful because I live in LA and you know. Oh, I hear you. Look, it's a complicated issue. It's so complicated. And it's terrifying. Yeah. When you look at the video of when they do an overhead of what Gaza you still look like and what it looks like now [1:17:06] I just I mean it's insane It's fucking insane It's gonna take over a year to clean up just the rubble. Oh my gosh, but it's like 25,000 now at least at least They don't know how many people are dead. They have no idea and just the half of the population is women and children and The trauma and the fucking, you know famine It's just it's just I just can't even comprehend it really Yeah, and these railies tell you that it's necessary and Then they they have to get rid of Hamas and this is the way to do it But I mean I believe that I believe I see. I believe that, I believe that, I believe that maybe that should be, but I think the approach could be different. Yeah, right. I don't know. I don't have any expertise in war, neither, but I'm horrified that they can just shoot missiles into buildings. [1:18:02] And they tell people to get out, but then they bomb the areas where they're going to. I mean, the whole thing's nuts, man. It's nuts and it's so dangerous. It's so dangerous. These free Palestine marches that are happening all over the world, those are all organized too, by the way. When you get on social media and you see the free Palestine people and the pro-Israel people, what percentage of those people are bots? Right. It's not zero. It's not zero. There's a lot of what's getting stirred up, a lot of the hateful things that are being said, a lot of the crazy things that are being said. I guarantee you a lot of that's being instigated by foreign countries. That's what's scary about social media and the influence it has on people and the way they feel about a particular issue. And that's on top of the horrific nature of the issue itself, both of October 7th, which is undeniably horrific. Perfect. And then this, and then on top of that, you have this open antisemitism that we never saw before, where it's just open everywhere. [1:19:01] It's wild. It's fucking terrible. It's so scary man. But it's also an issue that will never be resolved. But it's not just that it'll never be resolved. I never thought it was going to be an issue where the presidents of major universities were standing in front of Congress. And they were justifying people saying death to the Jews that it wasn't harassment unless it was actionable. I don't tell you that's insane. Yeah. When the congresswoman was trying to get them to expand on that, do you mean actual genocide? Then it's harassment when they can't actually do that? Yeah, yeah. What the fuck are you saying? Yeah. But it's the same thing we were talking about. It's the cult. They're in that leftist cult, and it's not reasonable. It doesn't make any sense. It's all crazy. Oh, I went there were like Osama bin Lon and could have been Ryan or whatever that do remember that fucking trail. Yeah, fucking insane. What are you talking about and these are people right that weren't that I was there. That's gonna take talk thing to Yeah, Osama bin Lon in 2000 right or when 2001 I was on mad TV [1:20:04] 2000 right or two when 2001 I was on mad TV 9-11 happened I went to work the next day Andrew daily one of the actress his cousin was on one of the flights, right and I could feel the pain right and you know we were indicted with the the fucking footage Yeah, and just in the moment it was fucking horrifying yeah it changed America 100% and now people that weren't even around then kids which is fine but now they have these grand ideas about it's insane well it's also what where did those some been lot and come from well he came from the CIA funding them the Mujahadine to fight against the Soviet Union. They're trained, they're trained by America. Look, there's a certain reality to American imperialism. It doesn't do anybody any good to deny it. We have military bases in the area everywhere. If you were a foreign country, and a nationalistic foreign country, [1:21:01] of course you'd hate America. Of course you'd hate what we do. I mean, look at what's going on right now with this Ukraine Russia thing. Look at how much money's being funneled through that. How much insane amounts of money. Yeah. And most of it's like in bezels, right? Who fucking knows? But again, it's not zero. It's not zero percent. It's getting in bezeled. And the fact that all of a sudden no one wanted to admit that Ukraine had always been a very corrupt country There's a crazy Twitter exchange between Candace Owens and the New York Times where Candace Owens was Talking about how corrupt Ukraine is and then the New York Times says to her like what evidence do you have that Ukraine is corrupt? She goes, oh, you mean there are links from your fucking newspaper and just from like 2016 and before that, there's all these fucking stories about how corrupt Ukraine is in the New York Times. They didn't even bother looking it up because when you're in the cult, the cult says you support Ukraine. Do you want Ukraine to win or do you want Russia to win? Like what the fuck are you even saying? [1:22:02] How much do you know about why this thing was instigated in the first place how much do you know about NATO About how much they're moving arms closer to the Soviet Union about how Ukraine joining NATO was always a red flag do you do you know I don't know I don't know nothing most people that are talking about it don't know either that was the red line that you could not cross You you crane joining Russia or joining NATO rather The whole things is fucking terrifying because we're dealing with nuclear superpowers. When Xi Jinping tells Biden that Taiwan will join China again, like that means they're gonna take Taiwan. What are we gonna do if they take Taiwan? What are we gonna do? And then Biden says we're not gonna do anything. Like okay, first he said we're gonna stop them. Now he says we're not gonna do anything. Like, first he said we're gonna stop them, now he says we're not gonna do anything, like, oh my god. And he's only saying whatever the fuck they write down for him. The whole thing's nuts. It's like who's deciding what happens and doesn't happen. It's not that guy, right? So if it's not him, who the fuck is it? Is it the secretary of state? [1:23:01] Is it the press secretary? Who's, is it the military industrial complex? Are they completely at the helm? Will they ever let control of that wheel to anybody else, now that they have it? Is it the shit you think about when you lay in bed at night? Mm-hmm. Yeah. How the fuck do you sleep? Sometimes I don't. Yeah, yeah. That's a real problem at night. Yeah. At night, I have my most anxiety-filled moments about this stuff. I've talked about it openly. But I'll really freak out at night because I legitimately think we are one or two events away from living in the Stone Age again. And I think it could happen in our lifetime and it could happen to you and I. Like I'm really convinced that the fabric of society is way more fragile than anyone appreciates. Yeah. That most people appreciate, brother. I mean, I feel it in the air. Yeah. Well, you saw it during the joy of Floyd Times in LA. Oh, yeah. I felt it. Yeah. It was Mad Max Times. Right. When they were burning those cop cars on the highway, and I remember seeing that going, I got to get the fuck out of here. Yeah. This ain't gonna get better. Was it that or COVID that made you... Both those things. And then money, probably like taxes. [1:24:06] No, that was not even a consideration. Taxes are nice, but it was the freedom. It was these fucking dipshits, like the mayor of Los Angeles, telling everybody what businesses they can and can't have open, what's essential and non-essential, like says who? Yeah. And after a while, when a bunch of people had had COVID and then gotten over it and they were fine I was like, well, wait a bit it like how how scary is this and why are we closing everything down? Why aren't we giving people choice? I never I bought into it Of course you leave the house for two fucking years Hmm, I didn't even go to the grocery store and I had to spray I had to spray everything down Doritos spraying it with, it was insane. Well, my whole family got it early on before there was anything, before there was a vaccine, before there was anything. And I didn't get it. And I didn't do anything different. I hugged my kids, I fucked my wife, I hung out with them. I just took care of myself. Yeah, you've had a COVID though, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, eventually. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I got it. I got it when the Delta variant was around, I got it when I was doing arenas in Florida. [1:25:07] And I was gone, got it because I was hanging out with my friend John Schoeman. My friend John Schoeman is a buddy of mine who makes pool cues. And he lives right there and I got to see him after the show and we played pool till like 3.30 in the morning and I was sick. But yeah, then it wasn't that bad. But my point is like my whole family got it and I didn't get it. They weren't vaccinated. No, no, there was no vaccine back then. Okay, so yeah. And I didn't do anything different then. Yeah. I remember I worked out two days where I was tired and I realized I was fighting something off. Like there was two days where I was in the gym, I was like, you know what, I'm just gonna go through the motions here. I'm just gonna lift light weights and just like let my body like break a little bit of a sweat but no exertion. Just get some circulation going. So I did like some kettlebell exercises like 35 pounds. Nothing strenuously, just nice and light and just get the body moving. And then the next day I went back in the gym. Feel the same, same thing, today same thing. [1:26:06] Did some push ups, did some chin ups. Nothing crazy like reps of five chin ups. Not just a little bit of exercise, nothing extraannuous. And then the next day I felt great. The next day I had a full regular workout. So whatever it was, I fought it off. And so then I was like, well, what is that play here? How much of it, how much of, can your immune system stop this? Or is it something that you 100% get? No, it seems very infectious, but it also seems like if you have a healthy immune system, this isn't a death sentence. This isn't a boa. This isn't, so what the fuck is going on? And then the vaccine came out and I signed up to get vaccinated. The UFC had this whole allotment of vaccines, but I was there on a Friday for the UFC and they said you have to go to the clinic and I said I can't out of the time. They said come back Monday, I said no, but I'll be back in two weeks. So I was gonna get vaccinated in two weeks and in the two weeks they pulled it. They pulled the Johnson and Johnson for blood clots and two people I knew got strokes, two people. Oh my God. Two people. Within the 10 days of taking that vaccine, [1:27:08] two people I knew had strokes. Yeah. Healthy people. Like weird blood clots. People were getting blood clots. I mean, it is true that if you were older though, like it's 70 and you had some sort of like, you know, I mean, comorbidity, what's the word comorbidity? Core morbidity, right? That they could die, right? I mean, that's a true thing, right? Like a hermit can, he died. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Look, they died of the flu too. I mean, it's a bad cold. It's not dismissing what it is. But it's dismissing this control that all of a sudden the medical industrial complex and the government has it has over you and your job and your choices in your life. For something that now they admit they could have never contained that it was never going to stop transmission, that it was never going to stop infection. It was all just lies. They lied about the efficacy, they lied about the protection in parts, they put it out on MSNBC, Rachel Maddow. The virus stops with you. [1:28:02] You can't get it. It's not true. It was not true. There was no evidence that it did that. Not only was there no evidence, they never even tested it for transmission. Wow. They just tested it, try to see if it makes anybody. But what scared me was when Michael Yo, when you know Michael Yo, when he was in the ICU because of COVID. In my mind, I don't know why because I know that Michael Yo is athletic. Yeah, I thought to myself, oh, if he's in the ICU, I would have died. You know what I mean? I thought, I mean, my mom got it and she was fine. It's Michael Yo, he's weak. I don't know what it is, man. It could have caught him absolutely exhausted. Baby, yeah. That's what I've heard of people getting it really bad. It catches them when they go on a bender. And that's what happened with me. I was drinking till 330 in the morning. I think when drinking first of all, is absolutely terrible for your body and terrible for your immune system. And if you're drinking, I was drinking these five super sweet, super potent margaritas, we were hammered. [1:29:00] And then I was, actually I came from a show too. So I did a show that night. I probably had a couple of drinks at the show So it's like you're not in a good place to fight off anything like that You're exhausted and drunk and then I've been sick that way many times Yeah, times in my past when I've caught a cold or caught the flu It's almost always when I'm run down. Mm-hmm. Almost always so I don't know Maybe Michael Yo was really run down when he got it. I know a guy who got COVID really bad because him and his buddies were drinking. They were drinking and they're partying and he was really fucked up and then the next day COVID hit him bad. But he was weak because his body was weakened by a bender. Like they were drunk all night and then in the morning he started feeling like shit and then it caught him bad. Yeah but when I got I was really bad but I lived through it and it was fine. Yeah yeah. There's a lot of different things that were played there. First of all there was just general metabolic health that was completely ignored. People told you all you have to do is get vaccinated. That's horse shit. Your immune system is complex and it relies on a bunch of different things to keep it effective. [1:30:06] It relies on good nutrition, it relies on sleep, it relies on low stress, it relies on vitamins and nutrients, healthy diet, exercise. All those things were huge factors and they ignored every single one of them. When you look at the number of people that died of COVID, something like 90 plus percent had four plus comorbidities, four plus cancer, diabetes, heart attack risk, fill in the blank, four comorbidities, 90 plus percent of them. It's not that it's not bad, of course it's bad, but it's, you know it's worse, you motherfuckers telling everybody what they have to do and not have to do. You motherfuckers telling everybody what they have to do and not have to do. You motherfuckers telling people they could shut their businesses down and they have to take this experimental medication regardless of why they're not. They have natural immunity. Dude, he was Gestapo shit. I'm with you, but I'm with you. It was fucking mind control. [1:31:00] It was totalitarian, authoritarian tactics. They were limiting people's livelihood, limiting people's ability to travel, shaming people. The fucking government released during Omicron, which was nothing but a cold. They released this thing for the people who had been vaccinated. You did your job. For those unvaccinated, you experienced a winter, what is the severe illness and death? You're looking towards a is the severe illness and death? You're looking towards a winter of severe illness and death. When Biden's on TV, our patience is wearing thin. We have been patient, but our patience is wearing... Hey motherfucker, our patience is wearing thin with you. You can't even form a goddamn sense. Yeah. You fucking zombie. Yeah. What are you talking about? Your patience is wearing thin. You're not even looking at data. You're not talking about reality. You're talking to the cult. Can I ask you, why are they so reluctant to not give us a different option there? Because it's control. Because whenever there's anything that happens in the world, whether it's 9-11 and 3-9-11, they pass the Patriot Act. [1:32:00] And there was a devastating blow to free speech and control and just your ability to have privacy Yeah government had full reign to listen to all your phone calls Listen to read all your emails and they're doing it right now and that the NSA is doing it right now They can listen to any any time you make a phone call to someone. It's all really recorded Yeah, but when we complain like I buy this a little too old Maybe can we find a different option? There's just not even they're not even open to the idea of it. It's just like no He's the guy he's not in control right now, right? So if the people who are in control are in control right now Why would they want to swap out a new person? Deep state. Oh real is it deep state? Listen Yeah, you could put whatever words you want, but if you don't think that these corporations that donate Insane amounts of money to political campaigns have an influence on what happens in the world You're naive. That's the silly way to think of things now if you've got a guy who basically has no mind and he is your [1:33:00] Figure it if you can keep him alive for four years You just run it the way you're running it right now. Wow. All you have to do is get that other guy arrested a ton of times. Just keep arresting him, keep trumping up new, trumping up new charges. Yeah. Put him out there in the fucking news every day. Terrible things he's done. He's an authoritarian. He's gonna lock all the gaze up. If you just say that enough, the people that are uninformed and aren't paying attention, they're going to listen. And then if you have mail-in ballots, and if you have a voter machine shenanigans, if you can fucking sway things one way or another, then you stay in power. You stay in power. So you believe same person stays as the figure head and the same people run it now. Do you believe the election was stolen then? No. I believe that there are without without a doubt, in every election, there's election fraud. Sure. It's like, what's the number? Yeah. So that's what I say. I don't know what the number is. I know Trump apparently released a whole bunch of documents showing irregularities, showing that the mail-in ballots were incorrect. The mail-in ballots is something Putin talked about recently said the 2020 lectures are stolen and they use mail and bells but who knows why he said these things happen every cycle right [1:34:08] every election these things happen there's irregularities Hillary claimed that she won right right right I mean John Kerry claimed that he won yeah Gore claimed that he won remember the dangling chaps if lord I'm sure yeah yeah yeah yeah the idea but the differences but the differences that the Al though went okay. I'm gonna concede and Sort of took a long time. Okay. You know the the al Gore George Bush one how long did that go on before he conceded? I want to say it was a few months Mm-hmm. I don't think it was this simple as just conceding okay. I think the al Gore George Bush one went on for quite a while if i remember correctly because i remember being confused like what is never happened or a month or so a month or so that's okay so so think of that thing like a whole month whether trying to decide if it's true right it's fucking weird and there was a documentary that h b o did back when bush was president during these times [1:35:02] with this was when it was okay to deny the election because it was Republican. It was an office. There was a documentary called Hacking Democracy. In that documentary, they were using, I think they were using die-bold machines. Die-bold, they also make a lot of ATM machines. They make various machines. What they had found in this documentary was that there was the ability to have a third-party input. So first party input is you, you're the voter, second party is me, I collect the vote, third party input was also there. And so they used that on the documentary to change the vote. So they used it to change the numbers. Wow. And they showed that they can do it. Wow. I'll send you something Jamie, I don't know if this is true, but someone said that someone had just done this Recently here. I'll send you this because this is just something that someone tweeted Um, I don't know if it's true, but I wanted to send it to Jamie so Jamie could research it [1:36:01] But what this says is that in federal court in Atlanta, Georgia, computer scientist and engineering professor Jay Alex Halderman was able to hack a Dominion voting tabulator in front of US district judge Amy Totenberg using only a pen to change the vote totals. That happened this time, supposedly. Wow. Now this is a tweet from just a couple of days ago. Wow. I was a tweet from, actually a tweet from, that wasn't. Anyway, I don't know if that's true, but that's crazy if it is. Yeah. This is actually from two days ago. Wow. This person tweeted this. Now we'll look, see if that's worshiped, and see what, but here's the thing, when you have computers, if you have a phone, like with Pegasus, Pegasus was the first one that, by the way, the Israeli created Pegasus. And Pegasus was a software that, that's what they used to get Jeff Bezos [1:37:02] when they got his dick picks and all that shit. Oh yeah, good ones, good ones. Good ones. You got to solve it all. When they did that with him, what they did was someone sent him a link in WhatsApp. I think it was the head of Saudi Arabia. Send him allegedly. Send him a link in WhatsApp. He clicked the link and then Pegasus was downloaded on his phone. Now you don't even have to click a link anymore. Now they can get Pegasus on your phone. All they need is your phone number. I could have Pegasus now. They probably do. You probably do. You love it? I'm sure. Oh, no. How sweet to tech it? Is there an app? I don't believe so. Okay. I think according to Gavin DeBecker who's a securities expert, these things are constantly evolving and they get better all the time. They don't tell you when they're better. Yeah. They just have better technology. But he's aware of Pegasus too. And he said with Pegasus too, all they need is your phone number. Yeah. But hey, but Joe, but Joe, can I ask you something? What? [1:38:01] Can't you just shut it off and not, I there's so many people in this country just walk around and they just don't All these things that we're talking about right now. They don't think about it. They just live their lives Don't you think that that's a happier life or no? Depends on whether or not your voice actually matters So if you can change the way people think and you can change the way people look at things and then those people vote in such mass numbers that you can't make stealing the vote possible. Because enough people realize it's horseshit to the point where the overwhelming which you would have to like have fraud that's so apparent that no one would buy into it and be a national scandal. We need whistleblowers. We have them, we put a jail in the air, we'll get Edward Snowden, he's the only one who's gonna live in Russia now. Look at Jillian Assange, he's fucked. They've been prosecuting that guy forever, and if you ask what the crime is, it's nothing. [1:39:00] He's a journalist. I just feel so stressed out right now. I should. Why? Because that's reality we live in. You're stressing me out. That's the reality that we live in. We live in a very dangerous, complicated world. Yeah. Halder bin a University of Michigan computer scientist, changed results of a hypothetical referendum on Sunday alcohol sales. He flipped the winner in a theoretical election between President George Washington and Benedict Arnold, the revolutionary war general who defected to the British. He rigged the machine to print out as many ballots as he wanted. As he needed, all he needed, excuse me, was a pen to reach a button inside the touchscreen of fake $10 voter card that he had programmed or a $100 USB device that he plugged into a cord connected to a printer, rewriting the touch screen's code. Halterman delivered his presentation during an election security trial, evaluating whether Georgia's voting system is vulnerable to manipulation or programming errors. All in-person voters in Georgia make their choices on touch screens that print out paper [1:40:01] ballots. I believe Georgia was supposed to update their uh... machines and then there was a talk of when they were going to do it and that i think it's a it's it's also taken to consideration other than just corruption it might also be a budget issue ool headline says election officials say these vulnerabilities are nearly speculative oh merely speculative it's effective our election is safe and effective. Yeah. These people dropping dead. Yeah. 40% increase in all cause mortalities. Yeah. Ages 18 to 34. It's not the Nick and Sir and yourself with. Yeah. That's normal. Yeah. But it's merely speculative. Yeah. These people all have your best interest in mind. Is that a cigar? These are little babies. Can I have one? Yeah sure. Okay. You're okay with nicotine cigarettes? Yeah, I don't like it in hell. You want a real cigar? Big one? No, the little ones. You want a real cigar? I like them. Okay, once you have one. Is Cuban? Yeah. No, these are from Nicaragua. These are JRE cigars. Oh, fuck. They're actually really good. Yeah. Yeah, I'll open it for you. This is what I think, man. I think evil is real. [1:41:05] And I think evil exists in many forms, and it exists in callous disregard for loss of life, for profit. That's evil, right? And that's a real thing. Like you could say evil is the devil. Here's a little lighter here, buddy. You could say evil is Satan, and evil is demons, and evil is, you know, exorcisms and shit. But also evil is profit over human life, which is real. Evil is cobalt minds in in the Congo. When you watch pregnant women, mining for cobalt, getting toxic fumes in their lungs, whether some of them have babies on their back, that's evil. That's evil. They're living in dirt floors with no sanitation. It's horrific conditions and that is in everybody's cell phone. And everyone's cell phone is the labor of essentially people so poor they don't have to choose whether slaves are not. They just had, there's no other option for them to work. [1:42:02] But there's a powerlessness that one feels, like what is little Bobby Lee gonna do about any of this? So it's like a lot of time, but I'm just like, you know, everything that you said, I'm with you, but I'm just saying that like it stresses me out. It should. Yeah, and I want to walk around a little bit more free and you deserve that. Yeah, you're comedian, man. Do you provide laughter and you help people? And if it's fucking you up, knowing about all this shit that's happening in the world, I can get in the way of your job. Yeah. Yeah. It's not an obligation to pay attention to everything. Okay. But it is something that I think would help people break out of the cult. Because that cult, like you think you're a good person if you buy hook line and sink or everything that the left says. That's crazy. These are the same people that want war. These are the same people that are encouraging censorship. These are the same people that are trying to silence dissent. [1:43:02] That's all totalitarian shit. And just because it's done for trans kids or for black lives matter or for any social cause that you think is like undeniably worthy. It's still the same thing at the end of the day. The Patriot Act still controlled people in a way that was never allowed before. And it did it under the guise we have to stop a terrorist attack. Yeah. So even if they don't do evil shit to make these things happen, once these things happen, they take advantage by doing evil shit. And they enact control over the people that they never had before. And that's what they did during COVID. And the redistribution of wealth was insane. They redistribution of wealth, a big corporation, like companies. Like companies. Oh my God, so many people, the billions of dollars was moved. Yeah. Well, it just stresses me out. You want to talk about the movie? Yeah. Can we talk about the movie of promoting? Yeah. [1:44:00] Yeah. What's your movie, Bobby? Oh, I'm barely in it. And they're making me, you know what I mean? But it's like, but they're making you do promo and you're barely in it? Why are four scenes? What's it called? It's called drugstore June. What's it about? It's about a girl, Esther, right? And she works at a pharmacy. I play a main pharmacist. And it's basically she plays a Gen Z girl that's out of touch. It's kind of like a Juno, you know what I mean? But it's more modern. And what I like about a Joe is this. OK, is that, you know, I... Can I talk about Hollywood real quick? Sure. There's still gatekeepers. And for me, it's like, I think I'm perceived as dangerous, I don't know why, because I'm on a podcast, I say shit, right? And it's like, I'm always the fourth option. It goes Ronnie, Jimmy, Ken Jeong, right? And I like acting, right? So it's like, I think this is cool [1:45:01] because it's like everyone that's involved in it are dear friends of mine. You know what I mean? Pretty much everyone in the movie are people like miss Pat and people like now. And it's cool to like have. Yeah. Let's watch the trailer. Okay. Here we are. Gonna give you a consultation for plastic surgery. It's not what I do here. But just if you were, what do you think you would do to my face? I'd probably start with your mouth. A glit filler? No, I would. So that sucker shut. I'm a loser! Your Facebook group is right. I have no life. What did you ever see in this cycle? I can't say nothing is wrong. Two. I messed up. I need a coffee break. You're not even clocked in yet. I haven't been getting paid for any of this. Oh. Give me a double macchiato. I brought you some red chocolate. [1:46:01] You're directing my stream. Okay. I, June Squad. You would want to sit at the side. She thinks you're a fan. Oh, well, thank you, June. What? Ew. I heard the pharmacy at rock. Miss Pop. What the hell happened in here? What's your name? At Forever June on everything except Snap at June Forever. I love your real life. Actually, I love you. June I think I'm gonna start doing some investigatory work. Y'all are in the water, farm's to year up. I don't watch the news. All I do is smoke. Do you feel safe here? I'm going to have to get to the gym. I'm working for information. Hey, baby Boo. June Squad has a lot of time on their hands. Take it easy. I'll tell you what you want. [1:47:01] What are you doing here? I'm collecting evidence. You watch too many movies. You are not a police officer. Help us out here. God, Muck shots are so sexy. Can I take this home? No, not. Put your bullet to pet candy! Get down the way to the wall! Take it easy! Did you watch it? No. So that's the first time you've seen a clip? Yeah. What? Abby! Did you watch it? No. So that's the first time you've seen the clip? Yeah. What happy? You know, Abby Levitton, my manager. She saw it, she was like, it's pretty good. And what she said that I was like, oh, I don't want to watch it. Yeah, yeah. But you know, no, I got to promote it. I got to show you a great. Pfft. Yeah, hilarious. But I want to say though that it's like, you know, it's all our friends. So it's like, you know, you and your friends got together and we made a movie and I heard it's great and it's going to go into theaters. Yeah. I'll do all these things. I'm going to see it. I'm going to venture. Yeah. I can't watch myself. I mean, I don't want to watch me. Yeah, this was pretty good. Oh, that's me and Death and Roman. Yeah, I'm pretty good in this. I just came out on YouTube. It's like 15 minutes long. Oh, yeah [1:48:09] But I'm okay in that. Yeah, you want to get in acting you're enjoying it Can I ask you you don't like it? No, I don't like the process. I love movies. You're a great news radio. Thank you very much Huge laughs. It's fun. Yeah stand up some more fun It is but why can't you do all of it because I don't want to deal with all those people Yeah, yeah, that's why I did fear factor. I don't want to deal with actors anymore Mm-hmm when fear factor came along. I was like oh this is perfect Not there's anything wrong with that and the cast on news radio were amazing incredible Just you you deal with a certain kind of person that is 60% insane 60% of them are insane. 40% of them are cool as fuck. But it's just like, I don't, they're not fun to joke around with, they're shitty, they backstab, they fucking, they undermine you, they go to producers and try to rewrite your words and say that it conflicts with my line. [1:49:03] It's like weird ego shit goes on with them. They're weird, man. They're weird people. They are weird, but what, the jobs I have now, like I did at reservation dogs, I did, I'm on sex in the city. The new one. Oh, how's that? It's, I said no to it for the first couple of times they were like, you wanna do it, because I just didn't think that it was the right fit. I had never seen it. I know it's this big cultural thing. Yeah. But I just basically says, all I wanna do is feel comfortable, dude. I said that to MPK, that's showrunner, because I don't wanna go in there and feel like, like people are mean and I'm stressed out. And I don't need it. Yeah. And he was, he was comforted me. He was like, no, we want you on the show. And I, you know, I would go to New York and everyone was super sweet. Like, I put myself in situations that aren't that. I've had fucking directors call me a pan-face gook. What? Yeah, I had a director call me that one. Was he also? No. He was a white. What? [1:50:00] Yeah. How long ago in the 90s? Wow. I don't want to call the director. I use a big director holy shit And he called the other actress a whore. Oh my god. He's a get on your mark. You pan-face gook Yeah, yeah, this is back. You know when it was on wall. Is he alive? Yeah So he's doing movies still I want to so badly tell you what is what's his name rhyme with? I'm not playing this game. I know the internet. We tell him later. Oh yeah, okay. Oh yeah, yeah. He was gonna go through your IMDB and they're gonna find some likely candidates. Maybe we should do that. Yeah. Let the internet do it. Maybe we could play warmer. Yeah, warmer. Yeah, no, no, no. One time this director, I worked for the C Italian. No, I'm not playing this game Okay, one time I fucked up on a line and he made the whole Everyone like the camera man everyone in the wardrobe former circle They put me in the middle of the circle and he goes point your finger and they all pointed their finger at me And he goes repeat after me. You're the worst actor on planet earth Oh my god, and they all did that and tears rolled up in my eyes and I remember a wardrobe lady looked at me she goes [1:51:05] I'm so sorry. Oh my god. Yeah, I mean I had I've had Michael Bayes do something to me. Oh Michael. He grabbed my face aggressively. Whoa. Why? Would you do to him? Did you grab his balls? No. Can you wake up and do the game sucking out of balls? I don't do that. I do that for comics. Okay. Okay. Yeah. I don't do it when I'm like on a I did this So I booked this commercial with Eric Stone Street Right, you know Eric's Eric. He's a modern family. Okay. You know, he plays the fat gay guy. Sure sure So we played tower boys with Kim Ketrell So it was a I forgot it was a Pepsi commercial I think and she was in this bathtub and I had never acted before you know Joe Like I'm a stand I come from the same place you come, which is open mics and I Didn't learn How to I don't know the fuck that right. I don't know what a jib cameras were mark or any of that shit, right? Right so I had the scene where I had to bring these oh fuck I [1:52:05] Had to bring these towels into a fuck you know, you're like stacked. It's that with the joke. And he would go, your face needs to be in the light. And I go, I don't know. So I try to tilt, it irritates the light, the light. Right? And then like by the eighth one, he came from behind the thing and he grabbed my face like this. He goes, here, here. And like, here's, well, no, don't feel bad for me. I'm a survivor. You know, that's your Holocaust. That was your. Yeah, but in a movie, Michael Bay tells you to put your face towards the light. But in the 90s, I experienced that shit, right? Well, that seems like you really weren't putting your face towards the light He was freaking out because they could only do that take so many times. I'm kind of on team Bay Yeah, he just turned your face. Oh, you're right. You're making it sound like you're right. You're right. You're right. You're right You're right beat your ass. You're absolutely but also when you [1:53:01] When you come when you come from a background like me, yes, with your dad fucking acting crazy. I get it. When people scream, it fuck triggers. You feel it. You got triggered. Yeah, like term, what's a Robocop? What's his name? The original Robocop? Peter. Peter Weir. Weir. He's a screamer. Screams. Yeah, so I was on mad at you. Yeah, I was on mad. No, he does it to everyone Right. Oh, yeah back in the day. We wouldn't have sides You can't remember one line. He would like you else like that, right? And every time he would do it I would like tense up. I'm not pussy dude. I get it. I'm a warrior. Okay. Wow. Yeah, and then and then right I just went to the show and I go, I just next time I'm on the side, maybe not. Yeah. So they just did it, you know? But anyway, now I do shit that's like, where I feel like I'm wanted. Right. And I'll do it. So it's not like that crazy bullshit, where I need, back then I needed it. Right. That's all I would say, something horrible to you, you just have to absorb it. But there's also no recourse back then. I mean, that's how you get to like a Harvey Weinstein, [1:54:08] right? The guy who has just ultimate control, can do whatever the fuck he wants, and does ruins people's lives and careers if they don't accept his advances. That's where, I mean, that whole business has always been about powerful people, abusing the people that they that had to listen to them from casting directors all the way up to producers. Different than yeah. Yeah. Look, Tarantino was in here and he's talking about this old school director who had his office had a bedroom where he take the starlets, all the starlets had to fuck him. Oh my god. In a bedroom, in his fucking office. So everyone just assumed of a casting, you know, thing was going on, and a girl came into his office, he fucked her. And 20 years ago, I would have done it, I think. You think so? I think that if... Ha ha ha ha. I think that it was a huge director, right? You were an infucker. No, I would suck his dick maybe. Really? [1:55:06] I think I wouldn't say, I wouldn't tell you. Well, there's definitely, I would just cry and could have felt like some offers if that was out there. What? You could have gotten some offers if that was out there. Yeah, yeah. You weren't like open enough. You were a desire to make it. Yeah. I just think that back then I was like so like I had no money right and in my mind I'll be like oh this is the way it's supposed to happen right yeah Yeah, so I mean if imagine if you're an actress right and you come out the Hollywood from fucking Kansas You're 20 years old and you are all of a sudden in this producer's office and he's 50 and he's been Bang in stars for 20 fucking years and you don't know how it all works and he explains to you, listen honey, this is how it works in this business, you're like, well, I mean, okay, do you want to be an actress and you're kind of mentally ill anyway? Oh right. And you're like, yeah, I do say my life. Yeah, yeah. No one has to know about this. Oh, okay, you won't tell anybody. It's terrible. It's fucking terrible. Yeah. And that's probably what they did forever. [1:56:05] It's so fucking terrible. Yeah. And I mean, I know we have problems with the word woke, but I think in many ways, Hollywood wokeness is also good. Yeah, that way. I think now in a stopping the abuse way, but the problem is there's like in Hollywood particular, there was an over correction and crazy people like Amber Herd got involved. Right. Manipulating the truth is sort of gain sympathy. You've got a lot of those cases too, the Chris Hardwick case. There's a lot of those where the reality is so different than the truth. Right. And everybody just assumes that the woman's not insane and that she's telling the truth. But you're gonna have to have a few of those if you're gonna have to have real change, like a real correction of actual abuse. You're going, it's just like, if you're gonna accept trans people, you're going to have a bunch of instances of perverse pretending to be trans. If you're going to say, hey, we have to stop abuse, [1:57:01] you're gonna get fake abuse. You're gonna get people to come out I know man, and that's the way Hollywood is like bad it's the way humans are yeah But in the sense of like a show like beef getting green lit. Mm-hmm. What's a mostly all Korean or Asian cast? I think in that way it's good right, but there is an over correction in terms of like it's good because that shows good Right that's why it's good. Yeah, you're right. It's good when the show's good. Even if the show was good back then, 20 years ago, they would have never been the truth. Yeah, they would have eroded. Better about acceptance. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's still, I think art has to be, particularly stand up, is the best example. I can speak about It has to be what is actually funny. At the mothership, we have a fucking very clear mandate. No one gives a fuck if you are gay, if you are straight, if you are trans, if you are black, if you are Asian, if you are white, they don't give a fuck. Are you funny? That's all it is. Are you funny? And that's our goal. The goal is, and that's what comedy used to be. I had this conversation with Ali Wong once and she was like, do you think comedy is meritocracy? I was like, ultimately, it has to be. [1:58:06] Because at the end of the day, what's funny is what people are gonna come see again. And you could pander and you can get away, you can kind of like be half-assed and be treated like you're better than you are. You see that all the time when they make those lists of the best stand-up specials of the year. And some of them like, what the fuck are you saying? I know. You're so crazy. I think this is good. And they're only saying it because it's the right demographic. Yeah. And you can say that if they're talking about the right points, even if the stand-up is clunky and awful and unoriginal and just garbage, they still, they'll tell you it's amazing and I don't want to kiss your ass, man. I for a second though Just accept it. Okay. All right. I feel like Here we go I love it. I love it. I love just he just hear me out. Okay. I just feel like you know in a way [1:59:05] You carved the way for me specifically, because before I did Tiger Ballet and bad friends, I mean, Joe, I'll be honest with you. I mean, I would do half rooms. You know what I mean? Even though the eight years of Mad TV and all the things I had done, right? And I couldn't get an audience, right? And now, I mean, it's just like, it's night and day. I mean, it's, you, you, I mean, the path that you laid down. And even back then, when you used to do, remember you used to do it at the ice house, and you used to pop in back in the day, right? It's sort of like, I think it just kind of, like subconsciously absorbed it. And it became a path for me and it changed my life Because now what here what that's beautiful to hear and when I go on the road now It's like I get people that are like really they know me. Yeah, they love me I love them as well, you know, and it's it's a different fucking deal You are a creature of the internet. I am yeah, and you should be and the internet changed the game [2:00:02] The internet also made it instead of a famine thing. People had an abundance mentality because when we first started in the 90s, there was only a few shows you could get on. You got on Matt TV, I got a news radio. There's only a few shows and you were really lucky if you were on a show. I remember we were talking about it all the time. Oh my God, it was so lucky. Miracle. Crazy. We're on TV. Oh my God, we're so lucky. But there was other people that didn't get your spot and they hated it and they were mad at you. Like if you cast from that TV and other comics at the club, you know, I know you experienced that. And they were fucking jealous and bitter and they would talk shit about you. He fucking sucks on the show. he just knew anything. And they just angry that it didn't happen to them. Cause it could have happened to them. Yeah. Now instead of that, now we're valuable to each other. Cause now we're a community of podcasters and comedians. And instead of us being like in competition with each other, we all feed off of each other. [2:01:01] And we all support each other. It's a much better environment for stand up. It's a much better environment for comedy clubs. It's like everything's better now. It's also the connection with East Coast too. It's like before, I felt like there was like rival real mouse, right? And now it's like when I go to New York and as soon as I land, I don't even call, the seller will call me and go, what spots do you want? Yeah. And then like all the comments will come by, let's, pot, you know, it's like a family. It's fun. It's fucking amazing. Yeah. That happened during the podcast revolution. That's what changed everything. You think it's going down now? Going down the podcast revolution. Yeah. We still have. It's happening. I know. Are we in downswing or upswing? No, it's not a downswing at all. If you pay attention to the numbers, more people are listening now than ever. All the podcasts. It's awesome. And it's awesome because you get to see people for who they really are. No bullshit, no filter, no nonsense. You can't nonsense people for three hours. You know, at a certain point in time, [2:02:00] your fucking demons will show their ugly face. Yeah. your fucking demons will show their ugly face. It's really who you are. And it also shapes who you are because you get to kind of like experience feedback and examine how you think about things and why you say the things you say. And how much of the, and the early days, like how much of what we used to say was just for shock value. Like you were, you would go on a morning radio show. You try, yeah, I know. We would try to say shocking things as we could because that was the way to get attention Especially OP and Anthony. I know I know I know we don't have to talk about it I know it's no I could vaguely go around it. I'm just like at the time. We all did it Yeah, I was a survivor. Yeah, and I'm like oh, this is the culture. Yeah, this is the culture And also unlike LA comic I'm in open-and-thing with beasts And also unlike LA comic I've been opening up with beasts Paturies, North and all of us were fucking beasts and it's like You know and then you know at the time, you know and then later and then now you know It's but it's like but now it's a much more honest thing. Yeah because now you do your own thing Right and the people want to see Bobby. They know how to find Bobby and they go they seek you out [2:03:05] So it's not like some random person's tuning in like who's this guy? And then you have to say something crazy to get attention. Yeah, now it's just you could be yourself You know, that's the difference like if you got a million views on tiger belly That's a million people that really want to watch your show. That's not random Yeah, you know if you get a million people that are on like some Comedy Central show, a million people watching that, they're flipping channels. They're like how many of them are looking forward to it? How many of them just stumbled upon it? It's probably quite a bit. Most shows don't have like loyal dedicated viewers, unless they're like streaming shows. Most like if you're watching strange things, that's what you wanna watch. But there's a lot of things that are just not that popular and the numbers are like still not as good. The podcast thing is a while. I tried on the street in LA and I see a show. I'm like, who the fuck are? Who's on that? What's gonna watch that? I mean, maybe. Maybe, but like, yeah, yeah. [2:04:00] I mean, I liked that they're still doing them. I don't want them to go away. They tried to kill that man, this fucking last strike. Dude, that's so many friends that stopped doing standup and just been writing that went into a panic. Because they had mortgages and they just started, can we start doing standup again, right? Wow, it was hot. He hadn't done standup in seven years. Wow. And I know Owen Smith was getting back at the road again. We had him at the mothership, but he's a guy that I was always saying, like that guy, that's a velvet prison for that guy. He's too good. He's too good at stand up to not be huge. Yeah, I love him. He's one of the best comics in the country. He's like top 20 in the country without a doubt. No question at all. Oh, Smith. Yeah. making a list of top 20 in the country, Owen Smith's on that list. He should have wore sweatpants on stage, though. Who gives a fuck? He's got a more sweatpants, he got a big dick. Big dick. Yeah, you're right. He's funny, man. He's so good. Big dick, dude. That's a good thing. He was in town a couple weeks ago. We all sat in the balcony and watched his set. He did my And then he did the weekend he had blind. I said it was awesome. I just also want to tell your fans, [2:05:05] I have a pretty medium sized deck. It's regular. Thank you. I've seen it a gang of times. I know. On line they're like, it's like a minion. No, no, no, no. No, no, no. It works, it's great squirts. The whole thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thank God, that out there, you know, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Roode. Judging you by something you can't control. Yeah, but it's been a real blessing, man. It really has. And I have. The podcast thing is a blessing for all of us. Obviously. Yeah. It's in a change standup more theater acts and arena acts like sholts and all these guys and they just releasing their stuff on the internet doing podcasts becoming popular through podcasts yeah it's an amazing way to live I mean I was in Hawaii with Cigarette was in town I was just there vacationing and Cigarette goes I'm doing a show do it so they announced me oh that's great right it was like six thousand seats whatever right and when they I'm and I don't want it's not a bragging thing, but when they said my name. Yeah, and I walked up there [2:06:06] I Had never felt that before my life. It was a pure love. I Leave tomorrow morning shit. I know what you can change your flight. Do do my show tomorrow night at seven really? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll change birth's gonna do it too. Oh, he is yeah, he's in town. Christ is in town. Oh, I do it. Yeah, yeah It'll be fun. It'll be fun. Oh my god. They're gonna go bananas. Okay. Good. That'd be great The beautiful thing about those show Shane will be on the show too. Oh, it's gonna be awesome. Okay Hardeners man. Yeah, I'm good. Here's a thing though. Yeah, and this is what's great about it. I'm not afraid. No, you shouldn't be afraid. I'll follow you. It would be hard. Very difficult. You don't have to do that. Yeah, yeah. But I wouldn't be afraid of doing it. Listen, the show's gonna be amazing. Yeah, it's gonna be amazing. Alright, Hinch clips on the show. It's gonna be amazing. Okay, Simpsons here. I love him. Oh, he's the best. Yeah, yeah. He's so good, man. Yeah, yeah. We took all the good people. We fucked that up. [2:07:05] Yeah. I didn't, I made life better for these folks. It's a better place to be, man. It really is. It's a better place to live. There's less traffic. And so many people last night after the show were like, we've been here. And we move in here. And I'm like, I Yeah, but look we can have it me be like a house that we come every once a while should yeah, look Santina would love it here I know you would love it here. He likes doing TV shows too though that fucking idiot I know but it's a different craft and it's you know Yeah, I'll tell you something he always Guys like you know but guys like shultz and these young guys right? It's not a part of their dream right but when I came to came to LA, I was like, I want to do movies. I love movies. I get it. I love watching it. But here's the thing, Bobby, you can always still do movies. I still get offers from movies. You can still do them. Yeah, I know. I am doing it. Yeah. One percent could go back and do them. Yeah. You're a free man about it. I don't. I don't. Cliffs apartment. Oh my God. And it has this fucking insane apartment. I know this giant balcony, [2:08:08] which you can get here in Austin would cost you $20 million in New York. Wow. Oh my God. It's incredible. The life there is amazing. The life in downtown Austin. Yeah. There's so many great restaurants. I know people are cool. It's not what are the pasta bar. It's gonna be great. Oh, that plays great. Great, dude. It's incredible here. I know it is. And there's so much live music here. Well, Gary Clark Jr. has a club. He has Anton. He's one of the owners there. He's there all the time. Last night after the show, this tall blonde that would never talk to me and gave me a side hug. Ooh, side hug. And we connected eyeballs. And if I lived here, I think I could. Right? And I'm like, that also is an incentive. You know what I mean? Because I'm single. I love Texas girls. They're so nice. I know. They're so womanly. I love womenly, womenly. Yeah, that's what I like. Yeah keep going Why what we get stopped? [2:09:08] I Doesn't matter it doesn't know we're talking to you. I'm hours is that's good enough. That's huge. It's plenty Yeah, yeah, but if I leave you're gonna keep going no, no all right. I'll stop now Okay, so the next time I have all the things I want to talk about perfect all right perfect We're things for half-me-on Beautiful podcast. Great. It was beautiful. Thank you so much for having my pleasure, brother Watch out your drugstore June so now that we cracked our ice and we did this we'll do the more often right? Yeah, 100% yeah, please consider moving here, man I know it's a it's a thing like I said Theo's considering Paul is considering it We have Pauli sure is a different human being now. I know sure is so loose and so friendly and so silly on stage Oh, I love him and he's killing I love it. I love him He went up in the in the little in the little boy the little room and I hadn't seen him in years and I go do that was so funny You were so loose. Yeah, he's like at the commie store. I was always tense. Yeah, it's like it's hard for me to be free He's a different person. I also I wouldn't be in this business without him and [2:10:05] that family. Oh, her. I mean, that's why she's here. She said two things to me as a young comic. Okay. Okay. She's a it's a sin to support mediocrity. Right? I still don't know what it means, but I still have it in my heart. But then one day I was at bullies restaurant in in La Jollaoya, whether I was when Freddie Soda used to drive her down, he would go, come eat with us. I miss Freddie so much. I did too. Yeah, yeah. And so one day we were sitting there at Bullys Restaurant in Ilohoya and she goes, do you know what makes a star? I go, what? She goes 50% of the people have to love you, but it's okay that they all have hate you. It's all in the same. Right? And it's like, when I read bad comments now on, cause I get some because I'm like, I've risen, right? I just take that into the thing that it's like, it's attention, right? It's not personal. You know what I would tell you to do? What? [2:11:00] Don't read them. Yeah, I haven't. Don't read it. Yeah, yeah. You don't read them. No, no, no. I don't read articles about me, I don't read shit. But if you read it, would it hurt your feelings? It could. Yeah, it could. It could bother you. All right. You're a human being. Yeah, yeah. Someone says something, especially if it's not true. And it's influencing people in a of you people also don't realize that I'm a sensitive guy we're all sensitive right sensitive to that's why they're Lashing out the reason why they're writing mean shit is because they know what hurts them A kind person a happy person wouldn't be writing shitty things about you they're doing it because they're it's that old expression hurt people hurt people But when they make shit up do the other day I read I'm sorry she I I read this is what I read I heard Bobby Lee abuses his animals Okay, like why the cuz they want to hurt your feelings. They want you to get angry. I can I cast no boo. I believe you She she you do it. Yeah, I get them the best I go what's the most expensive shit the healthier shit? Should they have all those oils and stuff on it's not all every day [2:12:03] Advent you know every other Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, like, this is not weird that cats hate water, but they love fish. That's kind of crazy, right? It's crazy, yeah, yeah. It's weird, they love fish. They love fish, yeah, yeah. They don't want you nowhere near that fucking water. Yeah, yeah,, but it's like insane of course you don't of course. Yeah. Yeah, so I don't read it and just don't read it because Even if you read a hundred things that are awesome one that sucks is gonna like sticking your head because that's how a human mind is Designed designed to find danger in conflict and look out for it because it could hurt you and so when you see that one thing That's the thing you're gonna concentrate on is the one person that hates you. Why do they hate me? Yeah. Oh my god, what if they're near me? That feeling of hate is the same feeling that you would get if there's someone that's dangerous. It's from another tribe that's looking at you over the hill. And you think they might want to kill you. Like, oh, fuck. And you have to think about the danger and that's natural. It's a natural inclination of the human mind. [2:13:05] Right. So you do that with social media too. You don't see got the danger of that? No, don't do it and don't spread it either. The people that spread it, you don't realize what you're doing, but you're also affecting yourself. Because you know that what you're doing, unless it's like the person you're going after some legitimate Nazi or something. Most of the time when people are attacking, they're attacking someone to try to hurt them because they know that they can be hurt too. It's like a lot of the people that are doing this shit on social media all day long, we know them. They're mentally ill people. I don't need to name any names. I can't. But there's some of our severely mentally ill people that are just liars, they're insane, they're full of shit, they're on medication and therapy and they're just lashing out at other people's behavior. And it's like they don't realize it like to be a good person also means to be nice to everybody. [2:14:01] It doesn't, just because someone has a differing view on something, you can't demonize them and turn them into a non-human. It doesn't, just because someone has a differing view on something, you can't demonize them and turn them into a non-human. But people do that because they're terrified of that happening to them. Yeah. And I also don't like when people try to do things like that, I'm not mad at them either. I don't have like a thought to revenge or anything. You know what I mean? I just, you know, I just feel bummed that like they feel that way or whatever. But I have no, I love for people. I know you do. Yeah, I do. I love for you, Bob. Okay. Anyway, thank you. Bye everybody. Bye.