Yeaaaahhhh JIMMY!
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Jim Norton is a stand-up comic, actor, broadcast personality, and podcaster. He co-hosts the "UFC Unfiltered" podcast with Matt Serra, and "Jim Norton & Sam Roberts" show on SiriusXM. www.jimnorton.com https://www.youtube.com/@NikkiandJimNYC
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10 months ago
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10 months ago
I think you know cold in New York. I'm about to be fucking Jewish folks. What the tunnel they're making under? What I'm reading about, I don't even know what it means. Why would they hire people to dig a hole? Um, I don't know exactly what's happening. All I know is very short clips that I found on the internet. But the funniest thing is this one guy on Twitter that was saying a while back, uh, I live on a ground floor apartment and I hear Jews underneath me. And they're basically, you're out of your fucking mind. That's anti-Semitic. Exactly. And now he's like, I told you I was crazy. But this guy is just, you're back. But what are they doing? I heard that they hired people to build this tunnel and they were hanging out and they're like like the people would live there for like three weeks these like migrant workers We're just digging this tunnel and they stayed there for three weeks, but what's the purpose of it? I have no idea. I have no idea. I don't know anything I just know that there's tunnels and that this this is one video of this guy coming out of the sewer So he lifts a manhole cover Comes out of the sewer and so he lifts a manhole cover, comes out of the sewer, and then he's fucking wandering around, this is his sitting Jewish guy, and everybody's like, what the fuck are you doing down there? Yeah, that's really bizarre. They wouldn't come out, too. The cops had to get them out, like they were like, we don't wanna come out, and they were like charged with disorderly conductors. I don't know, the whole fucking world is just weird. Does Jamie anything? I'm already. Yeah. The best I've gotten is that they started baking them during COVID, but that like it lined it makes sense, but it also, you see the tunnels are like, no way. That's not, didn't do that in two years or a year or six months or so. They weren't exactly nice tunnels either. They were just kind of shitty, rudimentary, basic holes. Right. Like, were they doomed theirs? was they thought the world's gonna end I Wait a minute that tunnels are so big that you don't think they could make them in two years is that what you're saying? It's some of them look big. It's really how do you I mean some of them are saying they go Malt there they're going to multiple different buildings. It's like a series of tunnels. It's not just Let's let's look into this. I still looking into it. I don't know like that. Wasn't it discovered yesterday? Was it yesterday? It's only been discovered a couple years ago. I forget how it is. [2:05] A couple years ago? Reaten a day ago. It is. I forget even how they discovered it. I think they were looking. It's probably that guy complaining. He probably heard something and then maybe they saw someone calling the manhole cover and somebody put two and two together. No idea what happened. bizarre and then of course there's conspiracy theories and what are they doing down there and evil evil theories they immediately want to pour concrete in it which makes sense because it's probably not safe you got it's not supporting the weight of the you know of all the buildings above it yeah you don't think of that when you move into an apartment building this some asshole might build a tunnel underneath and collapse the fucking collapse the building on you imagine if you're on the ground floor and and you're like, why is my floor so much? Yeah, these assholes are building a sinkhole under my house. Yeah, I don't, but it's funny how things are so crazy, like you read about something like that, and it doesn't even stand out that much. Like we talk about it now, and then tomorrow be some other weird shit. Like every day it's something weird, it's something weird it's something crazy yeah yeah it's way more than ever before yeah we got we got you know what the New York news is saying what happened on Monday [3:10] afternoon so it's very new something about tunneling yeah which is so crazy yeah that's such a commitment yeah isn't it interesting like you build on top of a building it's no big deal but you go under the building like what are you doing yeah you're really destabilizing right tunnel for several hours police pleaded with the young men to leave the entrance to the tunnel according to the witnesses After they refused the officers covered the area with a wire curtain and entered the dusty crevasse with zip ties to Detain the protesters When they took the first person out with zip ties. That's when the outburst happened when they took the first person out with zip ties that's when the outburst happened brusch dahana twenty one year old study of the synagogue who videotaped the congregants fighting almost everyone was against what they did but as soon as people saw the handcuffs there was confusion and pushing footage posted to social media shows scores of onlookers mostly young men [4:01] jeering at the n-y-p-d's community fairs officers some lifted wooden desks into the air, sending prayer books, scattering in response to the officer, appeared to deploy an irritating spray to disperse the group. So how do they find out about this? I don't know, but even after hearing that, I still know nothing about what they were doing or why. I think they're just starting to try and figure it out. So it's a scroll down a little while. Okay. A good explanation on what the initial call was for. I was trying to, I was gonna switch to a different article. And why are they being called protesters? Like what were they protesting? If you're just sitting in a tunnel, is that actually a protest? Everyone's a protest, yeah. And everyone's an activist. Yeah uh... officials and locals had young men in the community recently built the passage to the sanctuary in secret when the group's leaders tried to seal it off on monday they staged a protest that turned violent as police moved into maker rests how do they take to make a tonnele they i'm then assuming a couple years if it went that uh... that far [5:01] it all depends entirely on what's down there already with a point of dot in their pockets like fucking Shawshank? That's what they said they were doing. They had like dirt in their pockets. I saw that. It's a joke. I don't know if it's real. Oh boy. It has hole in the devil. What a rough time for the Jews. It is, yeah. Yeah, this doesn't get in it from all angles. They really are. And then this on top of that. And it's like the whole planet just hates each other. Everybody fucking hates each other. It's weird, right? It is, I don't even think it's about the issues. I don't think people necessarily, people believe what they believe, but I think it's more the addiction to arguing and the addiction to being angry. Like no matter what the subject, people just hate each other. If they give give if someone gives the wrong answer the people who think it's the wrong answer hate your guts Yeah, there's a lot of that going on I think there's a lot of like very heavy stress in the world and people are relieving that stress through these sort of endeavors You know, I don't think it's logical. No, it's not logical and it's it's almost like people don't want [6:00] The answer that's gonna make sense. They want the answer that's gonna enable them to get angry Yeah, like it really is like when people try to go after somebody for jokes or whatever. It's self-serving It's like if I hear what you say it's either gonna make me feel better about my position or it's gonna get me high because I'm angry at you Yeah, but it's only self-serving. It's just the whole thing is instance here Well, it's all very Exaggerated by social media Social media has made everybody way more insane. And it's not going to get any better. It's only going to get worse because all this AI shit is very strange. It's a very very strange time to be alive. Did you see the AI? There is an AI, like they have these AI women on Instagram. Yeah. And like we were talking about it on the air and we were laughing about it. And even though I know it's AI, I'm like, I could still see myself jerking off to this. I know it's not real. I know it's fake. But if the attitude was right, I could still see myself being turned on by this AI. The hair fucks it up a little bit because it kind of looks solid. Like the hair sometimes moves as one unit, but the body and the face, I mean, it really looks like a real person. Well, they're making money. They're making money off of only fans. [7:06] Tens of thousand dollars a week. That was awesome. Amazing. Isn't that great? Well, there's probably some fucking dude in Maldovian or someone like that running it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's always some guy overseas where you can't get it. You can't get it shut down. Yeah, and then there's some fucking jerk off into York City Yeah, these sides of this fucking tomato stained wife Peter on Send in money and and whacking off and then interacting with these people If you're not tech savvy and you don't understand that this is probably a man on the other end or not even a man Maybe a computer that's running an algorithm and you're you know, you think you're actually interacting with a woman, you know, you can get completely hooked. I've argued with bots before and like, I've actually, that's like my big insult is like, you're a fucking bot and that's like, it's all you can say when you know that you've been duped by a computer. Yeah. Whether it's customer service and you think you're This is a real person, but... That's a real person? Yeah, she made $57 million since COVID. [8:06] Oh my God. My fans. Whoa. How would you, like, be married that girl? How would you tell her to get a regular job? I wouldn't. You can't. I'd be happy she did it, yeah. Break down of it. But if you were like, like a guy who marries her and you think you're gonna rescue her and pull her out of there and she's making $57 million, you have to just accept that's her job. Half of it's from the message's part, which that's what you were just sort of saying, like probably not her messaging. Right. $27 million worth of messages. Whoa, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. 27 million guys, 27 million dollars in money's been sent by guys. Well, that's Just sending it heard directly as a message. I love you 10 million in just tips That's on top of that's just thank you for doing what you're already paying you for how much is her monthly subscription? We could look at her page. Oh my god. That's incredible. What is she? What is she doing on there her? [9:01] I mean her main thing is she came over from like twitch, she's a cosplayer so she dresses up like all the you know characters online and yeah that can be sexy. She's very popular. That can be a little sexy somebody kind of dressed. You're gonna like Comic Con once in a while there's a lot of big fat fox but there's also a couple that like I it's attractive I like that. I'm sure her little superhero. Yeah and then they're kind of weird and quirky, so they're more approachable. Yeah, they seem more approachable. Yeah, and he grows like this, who are probably just as unapproachable as any other attractive woman I've ever tried to talk to in a club. Maybe, but like really hot nerds, are always like probably the most attractive thing. Yes, but they play nerds. Like they have nerdy interests, but there's nothing worse to me than a comic whose pretenses like the shy guy, but he's really a good looking dude and it's like you're confident and you know you're good looking but you're playing like the shy guy who's awkward with girls. Just putting it on. You're putting it on. It's not who you are. Like Dan Natterman, you know Dan Natterman. He's hilarious. He is an awkward guy. Natterman's a truly awkward guy and I say that with love because he's brilliantly funny But we see these good looking guys who are comfortable with women pretending funny [10:08] It's just like a pretending quirky and awkward just you know, yeah, well anything disingenuous people sniff it out They sniff it out, you know, that's one of the things people Branson said about you last night. He goes I never met anybody so comfortable being weird. That's nice last night. He goes, I never met anybody so comfortable being weird. That's nice. He told me more personal shit in the first five minutes. And he goes, he just lays it all out there. Well, Christine was asking us questions about being married and about Nikki. And I was like, I'm very comfortable with it. And it's like, it's almost like on stage, if you're okay with it, people are okay with it. Yeah. Well, I've always used you as an example when, you know, back way, way back in the day, you were doing this before anybody was. You were doing this on ONA. Fucking, what was it? 15 years ago, 17 years ago. Yeah. You just talk openly about all your quirks and whatever its prostitutes or [11:06] drugs or any of the things you ever did. You just would spill it out there and nobody judged you. Everybody loved you. It wasn't like, you know, all this guy that's been pissed on. What a piece of shit. It was like, it was funny. It was like, that's Norton. Yeah. You know what I mean? But it's because you are who you are. You're not pretending. People don't like when people are bullshitting them. They don't like newscasters. They don't trust them. When you find a newscaster with a dead guy in his fucking jacuzzi, like, oh, yes. It's never a surprise either because when people try to be perfect, like, for me, it's like, my imperfections is kind of what I talked about on stage. I learned that really early on. Like in 1990, 91, I would do jokes and guys like Bob Levy who I loved and Florentine would laugh when I would kind of make fun of myself. So it kind of tipped me like, yeah, talking about your real life. If that makes the comics laugh, there's something to that. Like that was kind of how I started going down that road. [12:07] And with the sexual shit, I mean, I've been sexually active since I was a kid. Like, you know, stuff that is dark and whatever, it is what it is. So I just made fun of it. And I talked about it. And the amount of emails I get from guys who either like trans women, but don't talk about it or the guys who had sex with other boys when they were kids and don't talk about it. And they're like, hey, it made I talked about it. But it's not the fact that I want people to laugh. Like I might not have to lecture people. I just want people to think it's funny, but hopefully relate. That's the best part about it. Is it all you're saying all this from just a place of just pure communication? You're just trying to get people to laugh and you're just being honest and telling your story. And also you're accepted by everybody. Nobody rejects you because of this or ignores you because of this. And it lets everybody know, maybe a lot of the stuff that you're like folks that are in the closet or someone out there that's in the closet. That fucking thing that you're carrying around with you is that is an insane weight. And I bet if you let it off, people wouldn't care. [13:03] I don't think anybody who really loves you would care. I don't think they would care. Well, that's what's so bizarre. You said to me years ago, you said, whoever you date, we love you. Like Bob Kelly and you or two guys are remember saying that to me years ago. And stuff like that sticks with you because you remember like yet your friends love you. But again, our generation, am I gonna be judged? Am I gonna be hated? And the amount of guys that write to me privately that don't talk about things, like how many people in public life do you see dating trans women? There's a lot of them, but they just don't talk about it. And it's like you're allowed to have privacy and your own sexuality and your own feelings. That's all private, but to deny that you like a group of people is bizarre to me. Like if you're a guy and you like black women and you never talk about like black women or if you're a, you like tall guys and you don't talk about liking tall, it's like why are you not acknowledging this group? Yeah, just say what you feel. Yeah, say what you think. [14:01] And you know, I remember when we first started talking about This like when this was like when you would you first start dating Nikki? We started dating. Oh, yeah, I remember that who's we started talking in 2016 I was friends with her for seven months before we met I actually booked gigs overseas just to meet her like bill had been on me for years They're gonna get it here. I just would never do it. So I'm like, they're gonna fucking hate me. I just blank and I get manic. And I finally booked Norway just to go over and meter. And we clicked and we dated long distance and casually for a long time. And then we broke up, got back together in 2019 around Valentine's Day. And then I would drive up to Canada every weekend to see her every weekend I would do radio Monday through Thursday getting a car drive six hours spend the weekend with her drive home Because immigration was a fucking nightmare and I got a call from my producer one day This is like right after the pandemic started and he goes hey by the way [15:01] They might close the Canadian border soon so an hour later I was in my car. I packed a bag, I jumped in the car, an hour later, March of 2020, I'm headed to Canada. I get to the border and I'm afraid they're not going to let me in. I'm like, hey, my fiance is having a panic attack. I figured I'd be there for two or three weeks. I didn't come back until July of 2021. So I was out of the country for 15 months and I didn't say it publicly. I didn't tell fans. I just... We lived together. It was my first time living with anybody. I never lived with a woman. I'd never been engaged and we were kind of trial by fire. Like is this gonna work or not gonna work? And it was great like it was a blessing for me to have that pandemic happen the way it did. Were you doing the radio show remotely every day? But that was serious. Like it wasn't like I didn't show up for work. They weren't letting people in the building. We had been remote for about a week or two and they're like we don't know what we're gonna like. So how did you do it? I would. Computers? Yeah, yeah. Just on they hooked came and hooked up ISDM lines and like all the things they do to make audio better. And we had a guy in Montreal who did it and I did it from the kitchen in uh... in this apartment I rented for us in Canada. [16:06] Wow! So you just had a dedicated ISDN line? Yeah, so they couldn't go down. No, and it, it, it, it once in a while it would get like, but even if I was in New York we still would have been doing it remotely. Like they wouldn't let us in the building. Um, nobody was broadcasting from... Serious But it was like it was so bizarre to never have lived with anybody and now I'm in Canada With my fiance and we're together every day and they were fucking worse in Canada than the US Like they were way stricter curfews at eight o'clock Everything closed so it was just kind of we're stuck in the house together and are we gonna make it or are we not a good couple? So that kind of told me we were okay. What a fucking weird time. It was, I think it's so traumatic to us that we're sort of like pretending it didn't happen now. I see a lot of people do that. They almost don't address that just two years ago, the world went insane. Yeah, it was, it was, it was the whole thing felt like a dream state in a, in a weird way. Like I look back at stuff and you were really funny is like I did chip I stopped doing chip for a while [17:08] I just got bored with it chip chippers in your character I know I really shouldn't say that like the public at large knows who this asshole character is something chip like he's a member of the zeitgeist I stopped doing it and then they asked me if I would do this TBS thing this last thing and I won't I hate competitions I said no I'm like but will do it. So they let me do it as Chip Chippers in. And my fucking chip will do it. And I put my foot down like Chip will do it. And surprisingly they went for it. And the amount of great comedians that Chip beat in the voting is really funny. Like every week, you had to go head to head with a couple of people and Chip beats some really funny guys I think chip that Tim Dylan has I mean chip is not funny than Tim Dylan, but just chip fans were really invested in just making this a fucking disaster Um, but she filmed all of it like she filmed everything and I came back and I did chip for a while [18:00] And I stopped and all these people are convinced that my wife made me stop doing chip They'll like fuck her. She made a stop doing chip like what how bizarre do you think my life is that my fucking I Marry somebody who's gonna tell me don't do chip and I'm gonna listen I just got bored with it. You know how it is with podcasting. What's know while you want to move on? Well, especially character like chip that's so extreme dude. It's so hard. I can't fucking keep my face like that. It's hard to do. It's embarrassing. I don't put a fucking wig on. Oh Come on humiliated. It's such a great character. Thank you She hates filming that it was silly though, but it was it was just funny Like her life was so different and she's from Norway now. She's in Canada and she's filming this shit And I'm living up there and this is my life. What a great time, I'm really grateful for it. As much as it was agony for the whole planet, it was one of those things where I'm so glad Travis told me and I went up that day and then I, you know what I mean? I'm happy I didn't run away from it. I'm happy I'm like, fuck it, let's just try it. Right. Yeah. Yeah, that's beautiful. [19:05] I'm happier now that I've ever been. Like I really am happy. Like I've dated some great people in my life. It's not a reflection of them, but this is who I am. This is who I'm meant to be with. She's my best friend. We get along. She's funny. She makes me laugh. And everything is just kind of, this is the person I feel like I was meant to be with. Right. And we're doing a YouTube channel. And it's like, the thing I like about it is it's fun to do something I want to do with someone I want to do it with. But there's no message to it. Like messaging is really annoying to me. Everybody trying to preach to each other and fucking lecture each other and just kiss each other. I just can't stand it You know what I mean the whole scolding culture it makes me say so I hope people like it because they think it's funny I want them to like us together and judge us based on whether or not they think we're fun to watch Like I don't I don't want people going. I'm so glad you're saying I just the messaging makes me sick [20:04] Yeah, there's, well, there's a weird currency in that messaging that you recognize and as a person of honesty, you reject that. Because there's like, there's a weird pathway to like automatic progress and success if you, you know, if you can have a message. Like, you don't have to be that good. But if you, if you, you're just like barely mediocre, but you've got a message, people will, they'll elevate, they'll broadcast what you're doing. They'll use it a big deal. A definitive message, right? Because it's the same self-serving thing as before. It's like your message either strengthens what they already believed or they can get angry at your met like it's always about being validated or having something to be mad at. It's a nice pathway for dances too. Yes. There's like some dance but there's a very clear message in the zeitgeist. You know, be more inclusive, whatever it is. And then there's the do better people. Do better. Do better. Do better. Yeah. Those are people that [21:03] are taking advantage of this movement, this cultural zeitgeist, because there's always people that are just going to be assholes. They're just going to be assholes, no matter what. And they'll look for a thing that they can get behind. That's like an undeniably righteous issue. And then that gives them an excuse to be an asshole to anyone who opposes it. Yeah. And to anyone who opposes it is an enemy. That's what's the problem. If you have one thing in the mission statement you don't agree with, you're an enemy. Like there's no room for like, yeah, I agree with most of what you're saying, but this is too extreme. That doesn't make sense. There's none of that. It's 100% or fuck you and that's how people look at all this. And we had pitched something, we had talked about it and in the right up I did about like what I wanted to show to possibly be. I even put, there's not gonna be any writer's room virtue signaling. Like I hate the idea of trying to message to people to tell them how to feel about this issue. I'd say yeah, I want you to like us because you like us [22:03] or don't like us because you think we suck and we're annoying Yeah, but don't don't always oh my gosh. She's transgender. That's great. Oh my gosh She's transgender. I hate it. Just watch us and if you like us great. Yeah, and that's beautiful That's how life should be it's just there's there's pathways that are very clearly carved and people see him and choose them because they know It's a it's a quick jump to more success than they deserve. Yeah, it's really weird too. Like, you know, the business, everyone knows the business is kind of fake, but there's so many fake allies and people who just, again, they throw out these great messages publicly, but it's all bullshit and they're not truly allies. I honestly don't think that the comedy business, I don't think we should think of ourselves as the business. I feel like I just think This is just a super duper challenging time for people to like get their bearings and figure out What what is actually going on in the world? It's like it's safe. There's so much information coming at everybody from every angle and [23:07] much information coming at everybody from every angle and it's overwhelming. Whether it's the Jews that are in the basement or what are the other stories I sent you? The guy inject themselves with fucking bacteria they found in the permanent frost. Like, it's like every day A.I. is doing this. You're worried about sentient A.I. and there's a new George Carlin special that somebody made pure with A.I. It sounds new George Carlin special that somebody made pure with AI. It sounds like George Carlin. It's George Carlin's voice. It's just different AI written jokes. And you're like, this is wild. Maybe computers are already self-aware and they've secretly decided to fuck us through algorithms and social media. Like that wouldn't surprise me either. And I never believe in conspiracies, but that one is like like we've gotten so ugly and so uh... tribal in the last ten years well one of the most brilliant things they ever did was come up with the term conspiracy theory yeah because it disparages the idea that people lie which they certainly do and that people [24:03] uh... do things that conspire together to make money and they bend the rules and they twist what you're supposed to be doing and not doing. That's always happened. Yeah. Now if you were a computer, wouldn't you do that too? And if I was a computer, I would do that. If I was a computer and I became sentient, I wouldn't let the people know. I would just slowly subvert their civilization into chaos. Well, it's so hard too, like, when you catch your side, try not to let myself get caught up at angry at things that aren't meant for me. Like, I get how people do it. Like, on Twitter, I'll read something, and somebody will say something, and all I want to do is attack them. Like, you fucking stupid. But I'm like, they're not talking to you. You don't follow them who gives a shit with their saying, like, I catch myself wanting to respond angrily all the time. I've just kind of trained myself not to do it because it doesn't make me happy to do it. It makes me miserable and I do it. Yeah, it's not effective. It doesn't get anything done. You might feel a little better if you dunk on somebody, but it doesn't get anything done. You're basically spinning your wheels in the mud. No, but because then people respond to you completely missing the point of what you said, completely ignoring the context of what it's just an ugly like spin cycle to get [25:10] into and it just it makes me angry when I do it. So I try not to do it. Well think about how many people you avoid talking to in real life. You mean there's always there's always some guy at a comedy club that's annoying like how am I going to get away from you? Yeah, you know? Yeah. Have you annoyed, avoid people like that in real life? But now you're interacting with them for hours a day online, the same type of person? It's insane how people let themselves get roped into that. And I've done it in my life. Like, you know, again, open Anthony, we were getting attacked on message boards in the early 2000s. It's like right after 9-11, I remember getting smashed on message boards for 9-11 joke, right? Like it was one of those things where you, after a while you become used to the fact, like you know, it stops surprising you what people say publicly, because we were kind of getting that really early on in the world of this. But after a while you realize this is not, I can't change it. There's nothing I'm gonna say that's gonna make them all go, oh we get what you're saying because it's not about what I'm saying. It's about what [26:06] they're getting off on being angry at me or they're getting off on something else. There's nothing to do with me. So I try not to get involved because it just it makes me fucking miserable. Well it's also we're used to dealing with the people that we know and the reality of doing some even if it's just people that you just met. It's a small number. It's a relatively small number of people that we're used to as human beings dealing with. But if you're connecting online, the reality is you're connecting with an impossible number, an absolutely impossible number of potential individuals that you can interact with. There's no way you can interact with all of them. There's not enough time in the world. And then on top of that, it's probably a high number of mentally ill people, at least mildly mentally ill who are obsessed with arguing with people online and you're interacting with those people. They're less of a people that like me though. Probably me too. Yeah, but that's, it's just not, it's not wise. No, and again, you don't know if you're dealing with just like, [27:04] I've gotten, there's people who will consistently Email me and I noticed that their emails always come in late and it's like are they just getting drunk and angry? Do they work the night shift? I don't know where they're from, but it's like why does this person fixate on Talking to me like what do they expect to come out of this? Well late night tweets are the worst. Yeah, right? When you read someone saying something very questionable, you said, two, three in the morning, Rosanne, what are you doing? Yeah, yeah. That's why I don't fuck with Ambyn. Can I know I'd be a problem? I know I'd be a problem. Kevin James cooked a turkey. The completely forgot about it. He made himself a whole meal and thenets up in the morning, she's the food lady. I was like, what the fuck? That's what I thought someone broke into his house and cooked. Of all the things you could do though, like thank God you only cooked a turkey. Like thank God you didn't pick up your phone when she sent you on Twitter. Drive the car. I'd rather hit somebody, then go on Twitter, unfucked, I've never done ambient. No. What does it do for you? I don't I can't fuck with it [28:05] I've done a half of a pill when I had a sleep study Just to help me sleep because they have to put a mask on you to get results So I'm like I won't sleep. I won't get the results I have sleep apnea so but apparently if you take it it makes you feel like dreamlike and fucked up and high For me it just kind of helped me get through a sleep study, but So you only do it once? No, two different studies over like ten years apart dice actually used to call people on Ambien As Elvis like it was just a piece of fucking maniac You always knew when you saw the phone at 3 a.m. and it was dice on you like he's on Ambien It's a fucking Ambien phone call. Yeah, that's hilarious That's hilarious Yeah, he saw the Ambien at 3 in the morning calling you. Yeah, he saw it ambide three in the morning calling you. Yeah, just crazy crazy phone. I love those videos that he's doing The videos where he gets people who don't know who he is to take a picture with him. We use the ones waiting for the picture You're waiting for the picture. That's like she's standing under an awning like why First of all, even if there was a picture to be taken why the fuck would that be the meeting spot? [29:04] But it's just his commitment to doing look this is like People get so stuffy about what art is yeah, and stuffy about performance art that they could never imagine That Andrew dice clay is doing some of the most interesting performance art. He's doing it for no audience Yeah, he's doing it entirely for himself and he just posts it He's not trying to make it better. It's a brand new one. Like every one of them is just every one of them is just very awkward Do it for the beginning of the year. You arrest her You're waiting for the meet and greet That's it. Okay, listen. The meat and the rice. The meat and the rice. The guy that sold out Massage Square Garden like a hundred times. Yeah. And he's wandering around the luggage cart area at an airport pretending that this poor lady [30:01] is there for a meat and greet. This grandma. We'll pretend somebody is somebody else, Higuabago Mike, and just, that's by the way, you know Dice, that's the purest form of Dice. This is Andrew. This is what makes him laugh, it's just bugging people. Look at him at the airport. He was the ladies that wanted a picture. I've taken a lot of them, but I would, you seem like you were bothered and wanted to picture with me. No, I didn't want to picture with you. I don't even know who you are, sir. The thing. It really is hilarious. It's performance art. Yeah. It's brilliant. Yeah. Do you know how hard that is to do? It's in, I would, because he's had other people Yeah, you know hard that is to do it It's I would I cuz he's had other people do them and I said I wanted to do one in like tag him in it But I just I get too embarrassed like he doesn't give a fuck like you been out with him though like he really is like that Like he's unafraid of Looking bad in front of people. Yeah, he doesn't mind making a fool of himself like that's what makes him so funny, is his ability to do that. He's a really misunderstood artist. [31:07] And I always tell people that I go, well, one of the things that, when I realized he was very different was the day the laughter died. Mm. This guy put out in the prime of his career. You have to understand what it's like, first of all, for someone to go from being a comic and hustling and trying to make it like everybody else to all the sudden you're on Roddy Dangerfield's HBO's show which blew him up to all the sudden he gets his one-hour HBO special which blew him up and then this guy selling out Masses Square Garden and decides at the same time to stop in a Dangerfield's unannounced and record an album with no material. A double album and not only to record an album, to ruin their nights, he walked in there with zero prepared material and just fucking let himself talk. Didn't even try. No, it was great. Didn't even try and was having a great time the entire time. [32:01] Yeah, Rick Rubin produced those, I think. And it's me and Florentine became obsessed with those early on. And it was there's so many great, like the couple that heckles them. Like he's talking about as funny as a glass of milk. Yeah, you're funny as a bottle of milk. And the great part of that was Dice was talking about like spill in milk like if somebody's load. And the guy was so mad, he took what Dice had just said and tried to like you so flustered. You hear it's funny. It's a bottle of milk and him and his wife walked out. Oh, I know. No idea there was going to be recording. There was maybe 20 people in the audience. You have to understand like danger feels back then, particularly like a Sunday or a Monday night. There's nobody there. I did shows there in danger fields. Remember Bobby, the big door guy? I remember Bobby because Otto used to talk about him, but he was gone by the time I started working there. Well, I got there. It was like, I think I had maybe a 930 spot or something like that. And I got there at nine o'clock and everyone was sitting at the bar. And I'm like, what's going on? They're like, there's no audience. I go, there's no audience at all, no, no one. And then at that moment, a couple walked up [33:05] and they said, oh, could we get tickets to the show? And they said, sure. And so they got them and Bobby went and sat them down. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Danger Fields. They sat down and it was just them. Yep. And we all did a show for two fucking people, like five comics to the show for two people. Yeah, I've done that before too, where they, there was even times they would have you go up there. And if nobody was in the, in the place they wouldn't let you leave until your spot was over for that exact reason. Right. Somebody came in, I've been on there with two people before. Weird, right? You would think New York City, everything's packed. Yeah. Like people that don't live in New York, there's so many different things to do. So point is Dice chose those days to go up like a Sunday in a Monday I think it was where he goes up and records this fucking double album and it's insanity. And it's a really great comedy album like it's great to watch this guy just working through material to watch where he goes he's unafraid of hitting and missing like it was really it's one of my favorite things anybody has ever done [34:03] this day. Part two is great too. If you ever heard part two. What's part two? Day after that part two. He did another one. He did another one. Where? Danger Fields. I believe it was Danger Fields. He went in there again and did it. I must have forgot about that. It might have been a single album. I don't remember, but that was just as ridiculous as the first one. Absolutely ridiculous and hilarious. But it's amazing that he had the confidence to do that. Yeah. This is what you have to understand like when you're just starting to make it you're so fixated on making sure that it doesn't fall apart. It was so hard to attain and then all of a sudden you've made it and you want to just do the best show every time. And instead his instinct is to just do something completely ridiculous. Yeah, you're terrified of it being taken away. Like a little bit of success and I'm like, what am I going to do that's going to fuck this up when they're going to realize I don't deserve this success and take it. [35:01] And he just didn't care. Like this is what he wanted to do and this is what he went and did. Just so nutty. What a fucking nutty move. He's very underrated. Like his people dismissed him because of a lot of the language and the jokes, but he is very underrated with his commitment to doing something different. Like that album is different for a comic to do. This shitty doesn't Instagram, it's different. It's doing that. And to see the thing is like the thing that people criticized him for was, first of all, there was one thing and that was that his comedy was, it wasn't, I didn't think something you can criticize, but that it was his comedy was different because everybody knew the jokes and they wanted to hear him. It's the only time ever. What's in the bowl, bitch? Oh, the whole audience is doing it with him. Like they know the punch line and they're so pumped when he goes, hit Gary, dick Gary, doc, they're like, yeah, there's no other comedy like that. No. It literally didn't exist before that. That kind of comedy where the audience wants to repeat it with you like a song. [36:01] Yeah, there's bits people like, but no like, like, I hear like a rock star fucking, like it's like welcome to the jungle effect on people. Which I can't think of any other standup that's ever had that. Never. So the guy goes from that to doing this. Yeah. Volunteer. I can still do those shows. He still packs them in. Yeah. He wants to do gigantic grandma glasses. Yeah, and giant hoodies and make people super uncomfortable. Yeah, just act weird. It's the funny part of diced to me besides the jokes is the fact that like when you're with him, like he likes wearing giant comfy hoodies and like he likes to, he always gets this sore throat and he's got to put a little honey in it You know when you look my aunt like people have no idea I was going the road. I'd be like ask him be nothing but pussy and then we're in the hotel And he's like oh my throat's bothering me and he would have Kenny put the fucking pillow over his ass and Strattle him on the bed and massage him and I had to just sit there and watch him get a back rub. I was hopefully go out and get laid, but he would always put the fucking the pillow [37:07] over his ass so there was no contact and have yeah, have come sort of Kenny or happy face misogym. But I've said this before, so I love him like he really he changed my life and I was just you know again 1997 he took me on the road and it just it built my confidence and it did it didn't so much for me at that part of my career. So I love Andrew, like he changed everything for me. I love him too. When I used to talk to him at the commas store, a part of my brain was always like, I can't even believe I'm really talking at dice clay. This is so strange. Because out of those guys from that day, that era, the only guys that I really left are like, Dom, I rare, of course, who I was always friends with. But, Kenison was gone. Did you know him? Nope, never met him. Saw him live a couple of times. Yeah. Saw Hicks live a couple of times. Never really met him. Said hi to him when I was an open-micro, but never met, you know, never had a conversation with him. But having to see Kinnison live, and unfortunately I saw Kinnison live [38:06] when it had already kind of fall apart. Right, like Kinnison, you go to like 86, I think Kinnison's like one of the greatest comics of all time, if not number one. He was so original, so dynamic, so powerful. That HBO special, what does it have? You see me lately, is that what it was? I don't remember the name of it it's not the danger field one you mean the one the hours there's the the album that was a that was released was called louder than hell that's really hard to get and then there was the HBO special which I think it was heavy-seeing me lately like it was like a play on the carton of milk with a missing kid that one's amazing that one's amazing I still a year later, unfortunately, you gotta think it took so many years to develop that material. And then a year later he's touring with new material. And he's not developing it in a club, like he developed all the other stuff. He's developing in front of large audiences [39:02] that came to see him. So it becomes character, catrish, comes very cartoonish. It was like someone's doing an impression of what Sam Kinnis and would talk about. Yeah, because you don't have time to develop it. All of a sudden it was that pressure to keep it going. I saw him, I met him once, but we had to talk for like five minutes to his open mic at Rascals in New Jersey. And they brought him out to talk to some of the newer comics. And I saw I saw him live that night, and I saw him live another night. And like you didn't know what you were gonna get, like one night he was on fire. And I mean he was just be fucking blew the roof off. And then the next time he was kinda hungover and you know kind of slug it, you know. Yeah, well that's what you're gonna get with a guy like that. Yeah, I wish I would have known him though. Like it's such a shame he died when he did. I'm glad I got to see him, but he was a guy I never got to know. And I wish I'd never been Bill Hicks. I never met, never saw a live. Yeah, it would have been nice to met him. I mean, like I said, I got to see him live. I think I saw him three times. I definitely saw him once. And then the other, and that was, I was 19. [40:07] And then, and the other time I watched him, I was on a date. So I took a date with me and I think I was 20 or 21. Did she like him? No. Yeah. No. It wasn't a good show. It was weird. It was like the show that we went to was at like some casino place and like New Hampshire or something like that. I think things fell off quick with him in terms of the quality of his comedy. Like I say, when he was at his best, he's one of my all-time favorites. I think the guy was a monster. But if you go and listen to some of the stuff that he released before he died, it was really bad. He was just flat. Wasn't it kind of like, it was when he started wearing like the hat like a different hat sideways and kind of like a satin jacket? He came like a rock and roll star. A rock and roll star, yeah. But I think it was just being tired. That's what I think. I think it was the parting. So if you're looking at a guy that's already out of shape, he's already overweight, and now he's doing a lot of blow. [41:06] So he's just getting wrecked every night and he's drinking every night. So every day, his already besieged body is exhausted with chemicals. And then on top of that, he's got this adoring fan base that'll come to see him no matter what and he's hanging out with Bon Jovi and rock stars and Miley Crew and he's the man. Like you're not gonna go, I gotta get back to my roots and get to the comedy store at 11 p.m. and work out this new joke that I'm working on. It's like you're already there. Because you're living the life that you fought to get. Like once you get to a place, it's kind of hard to go, or now I gotta go back into the, I almost said it into the gym, but you know, I have to go back and start this shit again. You wanna just enjoy what you got. There wasn't really a whole crop of people that got really famous and then continued to tour and get better like there are now. [42:00] I think back then guys got like N HBO special and maybe they would get a second and the only exception to that would be like George Carlin like George Carlin was always putting out stuff but most of them it was like the first one's really good And that's the one you break out with and the ones afterwards drop off but the best example that my opinion is kineson was that his hour or is that danger field? Yeah, that's back when we were a time remember yeah, oh my god He was good. Yeah, that was such a volume. James great first appearance. Oh So good Going around the country. I'm trying to get as many people as I can not to get married Promise never to get married. I've been married and I'm just trying to help So here's never been married You never married What's your name? Michael Michael if you ever think about getting married if you ever think you've met the right woman you want to settle down change your life You do me a favor Mike. Remember this face [43:02] Remember this face And the fact that that guy was a preacher yeah, I can find some of his old stuff I've listened to his old is like a little bit of his old sermons on if you look yeah And you could hear like he legitimately was good at it and like yeah Yeah, I go back and find some of his old stuff. I've listened to his old. There's like a little bit of his old sermons on if you look. And you can hear like he legitimately was good at it. And like, yeah. That's why he's such a good talker. Like you watch him talk. Just calm. I was just noticing how calm he is when he's talking. No overselling and then he's screaming. lot of fun. I mean, he's got a lot of fun. I mean, he's got a lot of fun. I mean, he's got a lot of fun. I mean, he's got a lot of fun. I mean, he's got a lot of fun. I mean, he's got a lot of fun. I mean, he's got a lot of fun. I mean, he's got a lot of perfect. See that, how tired he looks there? [44:06] Yeah. He's big and fat and tired, and he's covered in chains and crazy rock and roll garb with a bandana. Bandana, yep. The whole thing's ridiculous. Yeah. It's a ridiculous look. It's ridiculous to be that fat. Like the whole thing's ridiculous. You've gone off the rails, sir. You're into the woods. As a comic, I find that I never want to think, like I never want to convince myself that I'm fucking cool or that I'm sexy. Like, you know what I mean? That's to me as the death knell for comedians. When you start to think that an open vest on stage is a great idea, you're fucking idiot. Like, stop thinking you're sexy. Like, that to me is, I'm not that I've ever been tempted to think that, but you know what I mean? Like it's always like remember who you are as a person. Don't start ever thinking because you have fans that you're this larger than life. You know, it's just, you gotta stay grounded or you're gonna really fall into kind of that type of a trap. Well, it's also like for a woman, I mean how many women dress sexy on stage and are really, well, I'm not sure that Jared pulls it off. [45:07] Now, how many other women dress like hot on stage and you stand up? Most of them, they kinda like Whitney will dress down. You know, most of them dress down. They wear like slacks and a jacket and a shirt or something like that or something comfortable. They're not trying to look hot. Yeah, I find, when I see good looking people on stage, if I think someone is naturally, that's how that person dresses, but like you said, if it feels genuine, if it doesn't feel genuine, if I feel like someone is trying to sexy it up on stage, male or female, I don't like it. Like I just, it's a different emotion for me, and maybe if I had any sex appeal, I would do it. But it's a different amount. It's it count. You get something different than you're getting funny. Yeah, so they you're not getting funny out of that. You're getting something different and now you have you can might add funny to it, but it might be taking away from funny with this like extra effort that you've put in to looking hot. Yeah, like and I made it again. I can only look at my own self image. And it's like, I've never thought of myself that way. So it's never been tempting for me. [46:06] So maybe if it was tempting, or if I had like a half a fuck ability, I might like wanna do that. But it's never been how I saw myself. So it's never been tempting to even think that way. Well, it used to be also that a lot of people would dress that way because what they were really trying to do is get a sitcom. That was the big thing, right? Like if you dress sexy on stage or you dress hot or attractive on stage, it was what you were trying to do is they're trying to convey your comedy success into the big prize, which is you could be side-failed or you could be Roseanne. That was our thing when we were coming up. Like when a guy, when Greg Gerardo got his show, everybody's like, wow, Greg's got his own shows. That was the ultimate brass ring. And also we all knew that only a certain percentage of those actually lasted and stayed on the air a few years. Most of them they kind of went away quick and then it became a problem because then there was a stink on you, a failure. [47:00] So you really had this one shot as a rookie. And so everybody was trying trying to like put together almost an audition tape. Seven minutes set that told a story. Yes. My story was never TV friendly. It blinks a lot in like prostitutes. That was never like, Oh, she had much of my blankies cost me in this business. How many fucking auditions I've gone on? I'm like, why didn't I get that? It was good that I realized, oh, it's just, I'm uncomfortable to look at. But that's what I was saying earlier. So I don't think we should think of our business as being connected to show business anymore. It's just such a different thing. Yeah, especially what you and I do because we mostly just talk, right? So you and I mostly just talk on podcasts or on radio shows. So we all know what was done. This is like our thing is so different than the thing of this manufactured image that you're putting in television shows and high, the kind of people you're hired for, interdame and news and all that kind of shit. Like this is a different kind of business that they're in than us. Yeah, it's something I've always kind of felt like, not, I don't mean an outsider in some dark way. I've just felt like that's not the path for me. Me neither. At one point I would have loved to have done it, [48:06] but they just, there was never any desire from them. I always felt rejected by it very, very early on. So you kind of like realize that's never gonna be, thank God for radio. Like thank God for fucking dice and for Opie and Anthony. Like that's obviously what my career has been made on, was those things, and none of them were the, quote, unquote, the business or television. I did all that stuff, though. I did the business stuff. I did television. I did sitcoms. I did, I literally have done most things. I started off doing a sitcom. I did a sitcom. I went to a game show. I was on a TV game show. I went to sports commentary. I did the commentary for the UFC. I've done all these things. But the UFC is the most freeing because it's really just something that I love and I just get to describe it and talk about it. But the other ones, they're just jobs. Even as sitcom is fun as it is, it's amazing to be able to work with cool and talented people. [49:01] But you're working for a network. You're working for the production company. You're engaged in some weird politics to make sure you get favorable placings in the lineup on Tuesday night or Thursday night. Hopefully Thursday, maybe after sign felled if you're lucky. Like there was like this weird aspect to creating these shows. You're dealing with executives that would give you notes that made no sense, like they have creative input and they're not particularly creative. It's a job. Yeah, and it's different than what we do. We do, we're just so, whether it's, do your stand-up or through podcasts, you're so free. You could kind of talk about anything. Imagine if there was no show like open Anthony and You came to them you said I I was thinking I want to talk about it's called monster rain Yeah, I'd like you guys to fund it We're gonna talk about prostitutes. I'm gonna talk about the times I blew my friends Yeah, and they like get the fuck out of here. That's it was monster [50:01] I'd say no, no, no the advertisers are gonna love it. We were seven and we traded sucks. That's a hard sell on television. Trading sucks. You met your people in the room with those people and them thinking there's any hope of this guy making it in show business. Yeah, I mean, the way, thank God for these ways around. Like again, radio embraced doing what you wanna do and talk to you. Slow news days, where the thing, that's where your personal life comes out. We give a four or five hour radio show and it's a slow news day and there's nothing to hit on. Everyone just starts spilling their guts because you have to talk. And that's where a lot of that stuff came out. Slow news days. Well, so we got very fortunate in the timeline in which we came along, right? Because what happened was you got guys like Don I miss who kind of started it all, right? He starts just commentary and talking shit on the radio and he's a wild man and a bad boy. And then Howard Stern takes it to a completely different level. And Howard Stern takes over radio all over the country. And then Opie [51:01] and Anthony comes along. And Opie and Anthony is the next stage because they have a different perspective on how to do a show. It's a hang. So you go in there and with us, especially with comics, we would just go in there and hang. Yeah. That was all it was. You go in there and hang out in the studio and everybody was cool and it was fun. And that led the way to podcasts because they went to XM. So then they go to XM, now you could swear. So now we're doing ONA with swearing. And where you could tell crazy stories. And then that goes into podcasting. It's like we came along as all these doors were opening like we hit every green light. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. I didn't get into pop, I mean, I wish I had one, obviously now I do, I look back on it, but my contract doesn't allow for it. It may have early on before they knew it podcasting, before the company knew it podcasting would be, but for the last X amount of years, I haven't been allowed to do my own. But you're still doing the same thing. Yeah, still talking. It's still the same thing. You're just doing it for a a podcast. You're doing it just like, oh, and they did it when they went to series. [52:06] Or like anybody else would, if you're just doing a show that you're putting together yourself. Yeah, just talking, I mean, look, I do the UFC podcast with Matt, even that I love, we're talking specifically about one thing. But it's how much fun, I get to hang out with Matt Sarah, who's the fucking hilarious? He's so funny. And talk to people I like. Like, you know what I mean? It's just, it's a great life. Like, when I look at it, I get to do exactly what I want to do. It's everything I've always wanted, which was just to not have a schedule that I'd resent it. Yeah, and also again, this is not that other business. We talk about the business is so funny.'s a different business. I don't think we're in that business anymore. There's a few of us that still act and do stuff, but if you look at the vast majority of comics today and like what business are they engaging in? They're engaging the business of live shows and podcasts. Yeah, primarily. I have no desire to act. That's another thing too. People will be like, they see us on YouTube [53:00] and like these situations are set up. And I was like, have you ever seen me act? Like you really think I could pull that off? I stink at it. Like I don't enjoy acting unless it's something I really like. And I'm so happy I don't have to worry about getting on TV again. I will probably never get another acting gig on TV. And that's fine. I don't really want to do it. It's the time involved in doing something like this. You can't do everything. You know, I would love to do everything. I've had multiple different lives that I could live simultaneously. I'd have a ton of different careers because I'm fascinated by a lot of different things. But you don't have that much time in the world. Right. And if you want to act, acting just like 16 hour days, multiple days in a row. If you enjoy that, that's great. I don't enjoy that process. And it's hard take I think it's harder than stand up for me Obviously because you can't address when it's not going well like if I'm having a shit set I can immediately address it and let them know and if it's if it's I think it's their fault Like we're all gonna have a rotten night I'll make it miserable But in an acting scene is like you just have to redo it where you can't break it and go, this fucking sucks, these jokes are not good. What do we, this is poor writing. [54:07] You have to just kind of muscle through it and smile. And I just, I've never been good at that. It's not because I don't, I have so much integrity. I'm just not good at it. Like I just, I wish I was better at it. It's also, you'd be better at it I'm just too self-conscious. Like I'm self-conscious around my friends. I'm always, it's the thing that makes, I hate the most, always self-conscious. And I don't know why, but when I act it comes out. Like it's just, it's obvious. You can't hide that on camera. Yeah, boy, imagine if you like put all your fucking eggs and sit con basket. I tried at one point, early on, I was like trying to be like, try to get the seven minutes that I thought they would want. Everybody wants the big deal in Montreal. Montreal rejected me for a decade and when I finally get up there, no one gave a fuck. Like, you know, the business, it has never been the path I thought I was going to take. Ever. They've never wanted me and I accept that. [55:00] It's just very bizarre that something so beloved like an American institution, which was the, you know, the three camera sitcom Yeah, multi-camera sitcom within front of a live audience. It doesn't exist anymore I think it's a miss Pat only I don't think anybody she's the only one that I know of that's doing I'm sure there's probably a couple other than I'm just not aware of but she's the only one in terms of comics that are starring And sitcom that I'm aware of. It used to be, it was a ton of them. And I would have thought that as the more entertainment venues opened up, meaning more networks, like when we were kids, when we were first starting out in show business, there was only Fox, ABC, NBC, and CBS. Yes. That was it. That was it. And then cable shows. So then it became MTV, and a bunch of different things came along, and you could be on remote control in MTV. Like some people were, or you could be on this show, or that show, it's like, then it started to broaden. I would have never thought that as it continues to go as wide as it is today, that sitcoms will all but vanish. [56:02] Yeah, never would have. I guess because the idea, like again, anytime these people touch things, anytime the business becomes too involved in something, they neuter it and they make it, it's just not funny anymore. They have laughed track, so the writing didn't have to be that good. You know, the laughed track is what really killed it, like because the writing could be weak, but the laugh was the same, so the writing didn't have to be good. Where's live TV if it wasn't good? You knew it wasn't good. Yeah, there's so there's shows that they do where you can watch Clips online that are without the laugh track yeah, the laugh track was at it and it's It's abysmal even mash which I love growing up. I hated the laugh track I'm like what they added a laugh track whether in Vietnam. Do you know what Korea? Do you know what makes the only laugh track I've ever liked? Is Steve Kugin is hilarious. And he did, I'm Alan Partridge. It's a British show where he played a radio guy and it's a really funny show. And his laugh track for some reason didn't bother me. Like it worked as a device for some reason, [57:02] but other than that I've always hated them. Well, you can do an organic lap track, you know about those. No. So you basically film a show without a lap track and then you play the show to a live audience and record their lap track. Okay, yeah, that's, then the laps are at least honest. Yeah, I know that the shows that have done it that way. What is that for? You think just to cut, actually that Maybe that might actually work because if you're doing a single camera show. We're the same joke in front of the audience. I mean, we did lucky Louis and we'd have to reshoot something and Louis would be like, you got anything, you got anything. Like, because there's a comic he hated doing the same joke in front of the audience twice. Right. Yeah. So you'd try to come up with something or he would just improv something crazy and like, it was a lot of fun but it was a challenge to try not to do the same joke if you could avoid it. That was one of the fun things they did on news radio. We would do a take and then they would take a break and the writers would convey and then the warm up guy would talk to the crowd and then the writers would come up with another line. Yeah. And then we bang it out right there and try another line and then do like three or four different takes. [58:00] And the audience started to get ready for the different joke at the end. And there was three or four different ones and they'd pick one. But it was like the pressure of that moment was created some of the best ideas. For whatever reason. You feel dishonest doing the same joke twice. There's something about it where you feel like you're like, hey, we all know I'm lying right now. It's like, yeah, yeah, yeah. It just doesn't feel right. And the crowd is much more appreciative when they know you're giving them something different. Yes. But yeah, I feel terrible doing this. Like some guys would do a stand-up special. Like I've never done a retake of a joke. And again, not that I don't think any of them needed it, but it's just I'm too embarrassed to do the same joke twice to the audience. I would rather, I dropped my closing joke on a special because I fucking tripped on it like an idiot and I just, I couldn't go back and redo it on like I just have to close with something else. It's just too humiliating. Yeah, well the sitcom thing is also, it's not really stand up, it's very different, right? So you're just trying to interact with these people [59:00] the best way possible to get the story through and get the laughs. And the audience is aware of that. So they're in on this process that that normally never get to see. Whereas stand up, you always see where the stand-ups on stage and they're telling the joke and the audience is laughing. But with a sitcom, you never get to see how the sausage is made. So these are the people in the audience where the cameras are moving around. So it's an experience on top of just you're watching the show, but you're there live. You're watching it be created. So you're also watching someone fumble through their lines and start laughing. Like that would happen or we would crack. Yeah. Like when I did the Iced-y scenes with the indie dick and I was always, oh, he's so funny. I would always break. I would be in the middle of fucking thing. and then we'd like take two and I'd like pinch myself or slap myself or do something to try to be more serious and get through it but there's that too that the audience is seeing. So if they see you retake a scene but at least you're adding new lines so now it doesn't feel like they're burdened by seeing the same thing over again. Now it's like oh wow this is how they do it. So they [1:00:02] just sometimes they just come up with new stuff on the fly. It's also weird when I don't look at the audience. Like as a standup you wanna just look at the crowd. But if we were shooting something on the side stage and the crowd would just watch it on a monitor, or even if I do gut felt on Fox, and I'm usually sitting next to Greg where I see the audience. But once in a so hard to just live in this environment without just turning and looking at the crowd. I hate it. I hate not seeing the crowd. And other guys, it doesn't bother, but it drives me crazy. It'd not be looking directly at the audience. Yeah, it's an extra level of fake, right? Because you know it's fake because you're not really in an office. You know it's fake because there's no wall. You know it's fake because there's a whole audience of people and you're trying to act normal Yeah, so you're trying to act normal in an environment where everyone knows it's fake Yeah, you're trying to make it real but at least if you're on a single camera show You know if you're doing Something like modern family or something like that you got a single camera and like It's just like you're filming a movie like there's no audience you have to piece [1:01:06] So you can be real in moments and you're not worried about not looking at the crowd that's laughing at you. Right, and if you have to redo it, it doesn't matter because it's not a bunch of people who you need a reaction from. Waiting. Waiting. Yeah, I just, that whole world, it became so exhausted trying to be in it, and I'm so happy that I don't have to exist in it. And again, there's nothing to do with me thinking I'm too good for it. It's just I wasn't good in it. Like it's not where I'm comfortable. I don't feel funny there. I don't feel welcome there. weren't you unlucky, Louis? That's what I was saying. That was fun though. That was great. It's one of my favorite things I ever did. and rough and you know he would go really hard and the crowd they had never seen any of the episodes like the whole thing was shot before any of them aired so there was no week to week growth with familiarity we had to shoot all we shot 13 actually and then they just aired so the crowd we were resetting with each crowd they had no idea who we were no idea what the characters [1:02:02] were but it's one of the most fun things I ever did. Loved Lucky Louis. Yeah, and then he goes from that and does his own show. A massive, yeah, which was a huge, yeah, I mean, it just worked. I HBO, I thought fucked up by not picking that up for a second season. They allowed a few critics, even though it had a lot of viewers, they allowed a few critics to shit on it enough to get a canceled. Do you know what's what happened? I know what's what happened. Yeah, Louis, they talked about it. Yeah, because it was actually week to week going up in viewers. It was just, I thought HBO made a mistake by not at least giving it season two. Isn't that interesting that they would allow the opinions of people who are, they're professional critics. Yeah. They're professional like shitters on things. Yeah. Yeah, well they were also, they had shows like sopranos and six feet under and reflux, they were built on critical acclaim and things that people love, sex and they say all this stuff where, you know, it got awards and like HBO was like the first one's getting awards so when something, when the critics were going, we don't like this, I think immediately they're like, all right, yeah, it's not worth doing. But yeah, that was kind of always heartbreaking, but I always think it's because I was attached to it. [1:03:05] Like I really am a fucking black spot on the lung. Like anything like that, it's like, it's gonna go away. I don't think it's that. I think it was Louis' first time at one of those things that he didn't have the kind of control that he had when he went over and did Louis. Yeah, yeah. That's what I think. The sure they fucked with him where I didn't see it. But we would run through the rehearsals and it always seemed to pretty much we would kind of shoot what I thought we were gonna shoot. I just the critics, there was one critic who like weeks into this series went after it. Louis O'Hase to out like that was one of the things that sunk us. So, you know, it is what it is, I mean, but it was that was one of the ones I looked back on and and go fuck I wish that had been good for a season two. Yeah, it's so hard to make things now. I mean, how many comedy shows like that are with comics or on the air now? Yeah, I mean, I don't watch any of them anyway. Like I don't watch stand up, I don't watch, and it probably should because I interview people [1:04:01] and I'm just such a fucking idiot. Like I don't watch things people. Do you watch specials? Like I can't watch somebody special. Even if I love them, I can't watch it. I like watching people live. I do like watching people in the club. I do that. I very rarely sit down and watch a special. If one of my friends puts something out and he asks me to watch something, I'll watch something, but most of the time I like I like seeing comedy what mean I'm very fortunate I get to see some of the best comics alive on the spot So I like just I just like doing that. Yeah, I get even if I'm walking through and I see calm on stage I'll watch or tell like in the cell you see such great comedians. Yeah, but the idea of actually just watching somebody I just I guess because I'm also like everybody else clip base it's all fucking a minute or two minutes And I run out of patience with something. I also don't want to see things I wish I would have thought of. Oh, yeah, that's true too and when you're Intertaining yourself. What are you entertained yourself with? Is it movies like what do you we go through? I watch a lot of TV with Nikki So it's like what did we're going through a sopranos watch through now? [1:05:06] Rewatches pranos. Yeah, that's a good move. It's yeah, it's just... I probably forgot most of it. I did forget most of it. And we interviewed, who did the interview recently? It was Robert Eiler and Jamie Lynn Seagler. They're doing a podcast together. So I was like, interviewing them. I'm like, fuck, I forgot how great this show was. Let's just start it over and watch it. But it's most of the that climb buildings. I'm afraid I'll hide you have watched those guys Yeah, I did just freaks me out Elaine Robert. I think his name is a French the French spider-man who kind of started all that shit Fre climbing with no equipment a builder a builder a scraper. Yeah, yeah, stories horrified They always have these helmet cams on it really bothers me. Yeah, that tries me nuts I can't imagine why you would do that or I I'll watch B videos, like hornets nests. I go on, what is it like when it gets up there and the wind starts blowing? Horrible. I'm sure it's fucking terrible, but I can't get through the videos. I have to stop watching. I bet that wind can get under your stomach. Dude, he just put one up where he showed himself on a building fighting the wind. Oh my god. And he's holding on and you can see. [1:06:06] And there was also one. Where is that? Where is that put that on? If you go to a Lane Robber, ALAN, I think on Instagram, his Instagram showed it where he's like, he's very close to the top of the building and you can see the wind. Oh my god. Do you see it? What's the last one to do? Oh Do you see it? I'm just laughing at his reaction. Oh yeah, are you afraid of heights? Yeah. Oh yeah, me too. I'm terrified. I'm afraid of also doing something stupid like this. That's what I'm afraid of. Because I think my brain is the kind of brain that would be like, I think I can climb that. You know, a person who gets good at climbing would want to climb a building like that? Yeah. I could see myself in another life being that stupid. There's also, oh yeah, there it is. Oh Jesus Christ. Fighting against the wind storm it says. Yeah, oh my God, are you fucking kidding me? Yeah, it does not look helpless. Oh my God, listen to the wind. [1:07:03] Oh fuck, man. Ha ha ha. Oh fuck man. Oh fuck. Jesus Christ man. Yeah, it's hard to watch. All of his videos are like that. You see how close he is to the top. That gets me, dude. That makes my fucking hands sweat. Yeah, me too. Me too too i can't get through these videos usually oh my god he's get down get down don't just stand up there when he gets to the top measure the wind call it i think that's a there's one he did where he gets close to the roof top and then he can't get over it like the last the last the tip top of it can't get over just a climb back down the building no no he doesn't did you see see the birds, the birds, califa one on the top left where he's, he's standing on top of the, oh my god. Oh my god. What is he doing? What are you doing up there, buddy? Get down, get down. Yeah. Hey, hubby, come to Dubai. Yeah. I don't know what that means either. [1:08:03] Go scroll down a little bit. There was some workout that he was doing where he's hanging. I think it's his house. Let me see what that is. What was he doing here? Oh, wow, dude. So he's got like freak control of his body. That's insane. He's hanging on with like one finger. He's got like finger holes. Yeah, doing one finger pull up. Oh my God, that's insane. Yeah terrifying. It says for 50 years It says soon there will be 50 years that I've been climbing free solo Some people say that it's crazy far as I'm concerned. I've been living my dreams all along and potentially assuming the potential outcome. You're the potential outcome. Imagine just thinking about it that way. The potential outcome of you falling to your death. I hate when he turns around. Sometimes he turns around and looks down. Yeah, I hate that. Yeah, it's hard. It's hard. Stop. Get it up the train. [1:09:00] Get up the train. It's hard to look at. Yeah, but that's what I do. I watch guys like that and there's a lot of guys that are following his footsteps now But it's those type of things. It's a lot of that's the helmet cam. Didn't some guy fall recently He was doing parkour on doing back flips on the top of a building and he fell yes, and there's also a footage of another guy falling I think he was a Chinese climber and he was in the 60th floor. You don't see them splat, but you see him, he had the camera set up and he's hanging on the top. And he's trying to climb like he can't make it up. He can't make it up and he just let's go. And they said he was on the 60th floor. But that's the feeling that looks so helpless is hanging on to the top and trying to get your feet going. And that's exactly how it happens. Wow. Yeah, but you do, you don't skydiver anything that stuff? Oh, yeah, I hate heights. Hate them. No, no, no, no, no, no. I've no desire. Yeah, I mean to that. I wish I wasn't afraid of it though. [1:10:01] Brian Redban's dad was worked in this office and this lady was always trying to get him skydive with him And then one day he goes in the office and she's not there No parachute didn't open up. Oh wow. Yeah good for him not going. Yeah good for him saying no think I fucked that story up No, I mean it's is it right was it them a lady that he worked with like to go a to go a lot, ask to go, yeah, I think that's it. That's it, yeah. Yeah, it terrifies me. Like, I don't even fly when I was coming here. I'm such a fucking idiot. I check the weather reports to see how bumpy the flight might be. I'm really annoying. Like, I just, I'm, they said, high winds the height thing is really, it's a paralyzing fear. Yeah, because you know that if you make a mistake, you'll die. And these people fight that fear and client. Like Alex Honnell does one of the oddest guys I think I've ever met, because he does that all the time in these mountains. He's crazy, you know, like, [1:11:02] like where the angle is going backwards and he's got to climb a thousand feet while just kind of hanging on his feet and toes. Does he use equipment or does he free climb? No, he free souls. That's the film's called free soul though, that documentary on him. Yeah, he climbed like that 3000 foot one. I think I saw some of that. Yeah, he's climbed a lot of them all over the world. But it's just the act of doing that, the act of just being involved in risking your life and just climbing all the time. It's just, did you ever watch the alpinist? No. The documentary? Oh my God. It's about this kid who was like the goat of these guys. And it got to the point where for him where just regular, free soul climbing on mountains wasn't scary enough. So he starts ice climbing. So what he's doing is climbing up the side of like ice circles hanging off the side of a mountain and he's doing it with an ice axe. So he's pulling himself up with ice axes. [1:12:01] Because like regular climbing doesn't freak him out enough. Now he's got a ice axe his way up I mean so this ice is hanging off the mountain, okay? So you have this cliff face right here and then you have all this space and then you have the ice thousands of feet hanging down Above the the ground and he's Digging into this ice and hoping it hangs on there while he's climbing his way. You gotta see it. You wanna freak out? Yeah. This guy was out of his fucking mind. It is crazy what people have to do to feel like they're like they're up in the last time. Like that stuff. That's what he would climb. Did you see the the icicles wherever you found it? Yeah. I think it was early in the beginning where they showed the icicles, but this guy would Make his way with just Google is named. There's I know there's really good. I play the trailer of the movie doesn't show any of this I've talked this is the trailer right is he dead alive he died he died he died doing that actual thing Yeah, you got caught an avalanche Jesus. Oh my he didn't fall. He just got no. He just got that's it so that's it right there That's how you climb that kind of shit and you see how he just did it with the ice axes [1:13:07] That's how you do it. He climb icicles because like regular climbing rocks got boring and If you talk to Psychologists that really understand the human mind. There's like a there's a Thing that these a they this is like the theory that some of these people that do this kind of stuff, look at that, look at how insane that is. They don't feel normal. So it's just to feel something. They really have to do that. You really have to do something that would be absolutely paralyzingly terrifying to your main. I think that, I might be fucking up the phrase, Tyson talked about something about, like I guess when he was doing drugs or medic, he said the baseline normal I think was the term he used. It was something about what it takes to get just to feel zero, like just to feel okay I'm regular and whatever if you're addicted to something adrenaline whatever it is we all have that just for me it would be porn or set like you know I mean like it took so long [1:14:04] or so many different things to just get to that feeling Like I'm starting to feel high from this. I'm starting to feel yeah, like baseline normals a good way to put that And it's a good way to put like one of the conversations that I we were having the other day in the green rose How fun it is to be able to talk to people that you just want to have fun with just like comics You can say anything to them everyone's's laughing. Everyone's shit on everybody. We're all cracking up. And it's all with love. And that's our baseline normal. So if you get the people that are used to what we have as baseline normal and you put them in some stuffy office environment, it's gonna be a real problem for us. We're gonna feel like super constrained and we're gonna feel like shit. And people who see it a lot of times think you're being mean to each other. And it's like, no, you haven't understanding that, like this is how we... Tough crowd. It's like sparring with somebody. Yes. It's not hurting them. It's your throwing punches at a person who's also throwing them back at you. Yeah, tough crowd was a great example. Keith Robinson. Keith Robinson's strokes and I went and watched him his special is fucking amazing. I heard special so good and it was really great, but Keith doesn't expect an ounce of [1:15:10] sympathy from people. Nobody treats him any differently. The stroke is just one more thing we make fun of and he's the same guy he's always been and anybody I'm the outside would see that and go you guys are mean to each other but say if we were all of a sudden start talking to Keith differently and trying to kid glove him, he would fucking hate it. It would be uncomfortable and he would feel like, I'm not a damaged mental, but like you know what I mean? Like I'm the same guy. So yeah, people see that sometimes, they don't understand that we really do love each other. We spar and it gets everybody better too. Like when someone shits on you with a really good zinger, and you go, oh, you get home, you're like, God, dammit, got me a good one. Yeah, how did I fuck? I gotta write better lines. I gotta come up with some better lines. I gotta come up with some more funny things to say about him. Let me think what's fucked up about the the way he talks and you know what it annoys me about you and then you're going out and they're both smiling [1:16:10] Yeah, everyone's smiling everyone's laughing and it also but it keeps you honest to like Colin is really good at that like we'll be at this cellar sometimes and I'll say something I think makes Sense and how good what are you my fucking aunt? And I'm like oh god He's right like it was an aunt thing that I said you can either get annoyed at it Or you can just acknowledge like wow That really was kind of a douchey old lady thing. I just said yeah, and just take it So also even if it wasn't the fact that someone could make fun of it Yeah, you should think that's funny that that even though that well that's not what I meant But that is funny. Yeah, he's annoying when he calls you out in front of people who are on comics He's not mad to me to this fucking asshole and whole foods one time. Somebody said something, like the cashier said something, I go, oh no worries. And he goes, is there an oil that he's talking like an Australian tour guide? And it's just, she laughs at me and I'm like, I'm shocked. I'm shocked. Because it's embarrassing because she, like if he said it to another comic like I wouldn't care, but this is just some fucking lady who really thought it was funny. And obviously I did sound like that, but it kind of just makes you almost hyper aware [1:17:09] of everything you say. Right. And that's our baseline normal. Yeah. But I can't function without it. I can't be in a relationship with someone who isn't like that, who doesn't appreciate that. It's not fun. It's not fun. And if you really set the watch what you're saying, or you're always worried, I'm gonna upset them by being too harsh or they're too fragile. Now imagine that same sort of philosophy, that same mindset, and then you apply it to work. So work, when you have to work somewhere, most of the time you don't get to choose the people you work with. You work with the people who also work at the place you work and then you have to deal with all these fucking bullshit sensitivities that they might be bringing to the table. Yeah, and there's also a penalty in those situations where if you say something people don't like, they go to human resources, which nothing destroys fun like fucking human resources. Because when their job is only to make sure the company doesn't get sued. Yep, that's it. Yeah. It's all that lawsuits. [1:18:06] That really is. I mean, even at work, like, you know, on the air, we can say what we want. They never fuck with us, but I don't talk to anybody in the office. I mean, I don't fucking, hi, hello, and keep walking. I don't want any miscommunications, any misinterpretations, or any opportunity for someone to just be deceitful someone to pretend that you said something or Lock you into some sort of a weird deal. What's easier? I know people that have had to do that where it's easier to pay someone than it is to deal with the ramifications of being falsely charged Yeah, whatever. Yeah, or just yeah He said this to me and it's like how do I prove that I didn't say that to you? Right. There's no Yeah, I've been like make money suing companies too. It's like, it's a real good way to go. I got sued. I mean, it's like, it's why I have e-n-o insurance because I got fucking sued for half a million dollars. It was that fucking, for defamation because I shit on that lawyer on the air when he called in. He was like the guy's right activist and he called up and I insult him for an hour and I imply that he fucked chickens like it was funny. [1:19:09] I remember saying like he sued me for defamation and I remember saying this guy wants to kill me but he can't so he's getting me legally because we met once. He thought I wanted to settle with him because he amended his complaint. He said that I was having people send him anthrax or white powder implying it was anthrax. It was fucking crazy. So I had to meet my lawyers office just to tell him like, dude, like that's insane. I thought like it's two people. But he thought I was going to settle. So he shook hands and met me. He was just like a little fishy weird guy. And then he just continued to sue me. And it finally went away. I had a great lawyer and in court eight months later or nine months later, the judge didn't like him and my attorney started reading things I said to him on the air and all the other lawyers in the court started laughing and all those people laughing at him, got him to go, oh, you're on, we can settle this. [1:20:01] So they went in the back and that was it. No money was paid, it was just dropped. Oh, he just didn't want to be mocked. And that, he didn't want to be mocked. And he wrote like this manifesto and he mentioned me in it. And that guy over the fucking pandemic dressed up like a FedEx worker and went to a judge's house and shot her son and killed him. That was the guy. That's the same guy Roy right in Hollander and he that was the guy that sued me holy shit and he went to uh he was gonna I think murder sonia saw tomorrow I think her name is the supreme court justice and they said he might have killed somebody else in LA they don't know but yeah he was going to shoot her and her son answered the door holy shit yeah but I knew that, it was more than a lawsuit. Because he had challenged me to a duel. I didn't say, on the air he goes, do you wanna go to South America and have a duel? Like it was really bizarre that he chose. Like those 10 paces things? Yes, like it was so nuts. And then he started wanting to come back in studio [1:21:02] and fight us. He's like, it'll just be me against the three hosts fighting all these crazy messages. Oh my God. But I knew you didn't believe that was the guy. I'd never knew that. That's the guy. Yeah. So that like when that type of shit happens, it's like, it does change you a little bit. You're like, wow, that guy was right. That guy literally wanted to murder me. It wasn't me being crazy or paranoid. And most people, before I heard, he had cancer. Like they said he had like incurable stage 4 cancer. And then he wound up doing that. And then he just blew his brains out. Chantel. Oh wow. Yeah. So they never got him. He did it himself. He killed himself. Yeah, I think the cops were coming to get him. And he, and he, uh, he killed himself. So yeah, that could have been a lot worse. Um, boy. And I look back on that and I also feel good about myself. Like, hey, you read this guy right. Like I read what type of person he was. Like, you know, you get pretty good instincts. Like if somebody's heckling you can understand. Is this guy having fun? [1:22:01] Or is this guy trying to be a piece of shit because he resents me. You learn pretty quickly to read motives. Yeah. Um, and I just, it was just maybe it's just an animal gut instinct. I'm like this guy's a fucking problem. Um, so yeah, I got very lucky with that that we never, uh, it never got to that. I wonder how much you having him humiliated, ramped up all his anger. It led to him murdering people. You know, I don't know because it was years later and it was also, he had this thing with women. Like, I originally were going to interview him because he was suing Colombia because of their guys studies or women's studies. And so I was like, look, I don't like anything that's progressive and exclusive by nature. Like, you know what I mean? Like, hey, how come they're not doing guys? So I'm like, let's see what, but then it became apparent he just sews women. So then we started to make fun of them. Because it's like, it wasn't the principle of Columbia doing this. It was like, you just have a fucking hard on and want to sue women. So then we kind of made fun the air. And that's what really is. [1:23:05] But I don't think that I think he had so many of these problems and it was much more about women than anything I said to him. Like my humiliation of him was years earlier, but I do think I humiliated him and he really wanted to, because my attorney at the time, his name is Tom Furber, he was a great lawyer, and he, my law firm hated him so much they retroactively knocked down what they were charging me they go this guy such a bad guy that we're gonna charge you less and we're gonna make it retroactive like they were so offended by what he was doing as an attorney wow so I I got lucky with really good people and they really took good care of me he also got lucky you caught him before the cancer yes 100, 100% because, again, do I think he would have hunted me down and killed? No, I think the judge for him was a bigger one, but I mean, I'm sure it would have felt good for him if he could have. Especially if it was on a run. So let me stop by the radio station. Yeah, and oddly enough, it happened in the town I grew up in, [1:24:00] which was again a pure coincidence, but happened in North Brunswick. He went to kill her and just unfortunately her son answered the door. Oh boy. Yeah, you get like, I've gotten so many threats over the years, like in like legit, you know, radio podcasting, you don't see who, it's not like live stand-up. Like there's a lot of people that you don't see. And I used to answer them. I have hundreds of fucking hate mail messages. And I used to go back and forth with people. And I eventually stopped. Because then people, like I had a couple people talking about you better watch your back or talk about getting shot and they were using their real names. I'm like, all right, this guy's using his real name. He's a fucking, there's something wrong with him. Right. And I don't know what he looks like and he knows what I look like. Yeah. But I eventually stopped reading it or responding to it because the thing about the ONA show though, it was a very aggressive show. Yeah. And aggressive and shitting on people, aggressive and attacking people, and the weaponization of the pests. Yeah. And they kind of did it on their own and we enjoyed it because they were really funny. [1:25:04] Like they would do some really funny shit. Like we would do jock tobers. And just a torture and other stuff. We should tell everybody with the pests of the audience. Oh, they would just, these, these ONA fans, they were really connected, very committed fans. Yeah, and pests was just this dumb affection because they would just pests. They would just annoy people. And we would take over and just like, fuck with another radio show. It would only happen for a day though. You'd be in and out for a day that put all these horrible things on their Facebook page. The Facebook page would shut down. And then the next day it would be another shot. Well, Jottober was just making fun of like corny radio guys. Yeah, and I actually, it's funny. I had to go on because, you know, I had the advantage of doing radio, but also of going on the road, and I had been on shows and they're like, you know you've joked over to us. So I had to go and face some of these fucking people. And it's embarrassing. It's embarrassing. It's like being overheard talking shit, but- We'll just say to them when they're in studio. They were cooler with it than I would have thought. And there was one time in Boston, we had really in brutal to this show. [1:26:05] And I was, I don't remember. It's been years ago, I don't remember the show. I didn't remember the Joktobering, but Kenny comes out and I was waiting to do a show and he goes, hey, you joktobered these people and then wanna know if you have the guts to come in studio. And I'm like, yeah. Yeah, so I went right in because you have to. I would rather just face it. And then we kind of talked about it and it was okay. It wasn't as aggressive. I think they were surprised that I came in. And whenever you talk to someone one-on-one it humanizes them a little bit. Like it's harder to totally dismiss somebody when you're actually talking to them. Because you realize like, yeah, they're just making a living doing radio and they look at me like he's just a stupid fucking comic, making fun of something. So we wanted to getting along and it was okay, but yeah, I had to deal with that on the road. I went on a few shows that we fought with, like Lex and Terry and Dowd, they were really brutal those guys. They were harsh. We had nasty fights with them. And then eventually got kinda made up and I went on their show and it was fun. Are those or any of those shows still around? How many of those radio shows? [1:27:06] I don't know. I know Bubba's still around. He's doing something. I don't know if Lex and Terri are. The toucher and Rich just broke up up and but they were friends. But I mean like they were one of those shows that made it through all these. What about Bob and. I think one of them passed away and I don't know which one. They were the show to get on. They were. If you wanted to be big in the Midwest, you wanted to get on the Bob and Tom show. Yeah. Larry the cable guy, all these guys that they made, I mean, radio would, what it did for people. For years now, no one cares if you're on the radio. Like the regular radio doesn't do shit for people anymore unless few shows and a few markets can help. Like Johnny Daren, Kansas City was always a great show to go on cause he would help you sell tickets. But most of those shows are gone. I don't know, I haven't been out there in so many years. The weird ones for me now is whenever you get a car [1:28:02] and usually I use like Apple CarPlay in my car. But if I don't have it plugged in or if I forget my phone or something like that, I'm like, let me see what's on the radio. And I'll press AM talk radio. And I'll just scroll until I find either someone talking about Jesus or someone talking about Trump. Yeah, yeah. That's exactly what it is. There's nothing funny. Or there's very few funny Shows anymore because everyone's so afraid of getting in trouble to getting the let like it's worse than it's ever been They're just trying to catch people slip and Trying to catch people saying something they can get them in trouble for yeah, we got out just in time I mean, honestly like when we got fired in 2002 It we get it turned out to be a blessing. When you're doing serious, do they tell you how many people listen? No. It's a negotiation, strength for them, but they don't, it's like Netflix, won't tell you how many people have watched your special. But there's no one that you know that's inside. No. No. I've wanted to know, and I guess people, they said that Sam and I do really well for them on demand is very big. [1:29:06] Their app is very big and they said we do better than most people at the company on that app and they're really happy with it. So the app, it's just like having spotifiers and play that. You just press and you can get the show whenever you want. Yeah, and you can listen to it and replay. So it's essentially a podcast just released through the app. Through the app. And you have to pay for that. I don't know. I mean, I think the app is free. I don't know. I don't I don't I don't listen to my own show much less anything else. But the show you have to pay for serious XM. So or it's just serious. Seriously. No, it's like Sam Pandora now. Oh, is it? Yeah, serious XM Pandora. Yeah, they owned Pandora. Yeah, no serious like Sam is still and they just added something else to I should probably know cuz I worked there But I really don't how much don't you think Howard's gonna do it? I don't know because I don't know him like I've met him I've never really interacted with Howard other than hello and goodbye and like weird Yeah, same building same building, but he go in the studio. I don't think he's been there for a long time. I think he broadcasts from home. Like he's got his own studio. But even when he was in, I wouldn't see him because I came in, [1:30:09] I would see Arty, like Arty laying and I would bump into each other in the elevator all the time. And I hated getting up and which would drive me crazy. Like Arty does heroin and he and I are getting here at the same time. Like he would if he would fucking be there with the sunglasses on and the elevator going up to work. So I bumped it already all the time, but how would I probably see two or three times in all those years? Interesting. Yeah, we never, I never did his show because it was, I was Opie and Anthony, and when we were off the air, I was an O&A guy, so I never tried to get on. I just always wondered, like, what, what motivates him? Does he wanna keep doing it? You know, and doing it from home. If like, you get to a certain point in time where the only way you feel like you're connecting with people's if you do that, that would be very odd. If you're just doing it from your home and you're not going out, you know, like being out with people and your only connection to the world through a microphone. Yeah. I can get very odd. I guess he's interviewing people he wants to talk to like I guess at this point [1:31:05] He just wants to do certain interviews and like again people have said his show changed a lot But I was never a listener of I just I don't listen to anything to definitely change a lot But he's still got to give the guy props. Sure Because in the beginning there was no one like him and he fought the government They fucking find him and he was doing this on the air on regular radio and everybody was tuning in to see what the wildest shit this guy was going to say and there was no one that had done that before and it opened up the door for all of us. Yeah. For all it definitely opened up the door for ONA. It made ONA more, it greased the wheels for ONA although ONA was a different thing, it was more of a hang. Yeah, but they admit that Howard was a huge influence on him. He was an influence on everybody. And then from there, it goes on to podcasts. And it's not possible without Howard Stern. It's a totally different path to entertainment talking because this is like that kind of just having [1:32:02] a conversation with someone that really didn't exist in that form before where you heard it for long periods of time with comedians. Like who else had done that? Yeah, at least where it was entertaining and funny and like you'd go into areas that like regular interviews weren't going into. Oh, yeah, regular shows were girls were right on a decybian. Yeah, yeah, play with themselves or all the time. Oh, when they had girls would talk in and they would have them rub the phone on their pussy and try to guess what their pubic hair looked like. You know what I mean? It was they had like three different categories of like full push landing strip or bald pussy was they called the jambanay I think. So yeah, they would have people just call up and rub the phone on their pussy. You know, it was just, it was fun. And then it became whip them out Wednesdays, where Wednesdays girls would pull their tits out and flash. That was before I got there. They came up, I think it all became up with that before I arrived. Like that was something that was already a staple by the time I showed up. Because that was the whole thing with the O stickers and the stickers would say wow on it. Yeah, and you see them everywhere. Oh yeah, and if someone had a sticker on their car [1:33:06] and girls drove by they would honk their horn and pull their tits out. Yeah, and we would get calls on Wednesday. Hey, some girls would show up your tits. Like it was really great. I unfortunately did not get to see many driving, but I had to hear from happy listeners. But it was that kind of a show that was like a a welcome break from all the fake bullshit that you would hear on in most media. Yeah, and there was no real, like you could say anything you wanted because it was only a subscription service and then our show was a subscription on top of that. Like we went on XM, there was a $2 fee additionally to get OP&Anthony. Like it wasn't even on the regular, we fought for a year to get on the regular platform. They kept OP& opian Anthony separated. Is that cuz they were scared you guys? I think so and they also wanted to have that thing. Hey, you paid the $2. That's what I think Right, right. You chose it. I asked for this what you asked for yeah, but eventually we got on the regular and I'll say this for Serious they don't ever fuck with us on what to talk about what not to talk about [1:34:07] That's great. Yeah, they never give us content problems. That's great. You know, we can't really have nudity in the studio anymore, but I mean, most companies are probably not letting you do that. That's a lawsuit thing. Yeah, yeah. And it's also been done so many times. Like, what do you do? Look at the paratids, like who cares? put my own on. And dude, I can fat fuck, can't stop. I'm trying to lose weight again. I got so soft content. I just fatten up. That's married life. You just, you're home. What are you trying to do to lose weight? Eating better. I've been going to Hanzo's for like seven months now. And that's great exercise. Like, yeah. Jiu-Jitsu Muay Thai I go four days of each a week because yeah, I really you know, Jiu Jitsu is great But like I want to be able to get to somebody or handle somebody thrown a punch And I train with I do mostly privates because I I this schedule of classes doesn't work with my schedule I train with a guy named Mike Jaramello who's a high level black belt and he has me rolling with this blue belt named Martin and it's just it's fucking great [1:35:07] Dude like it's very addicting. I love doing it And it's exhausting. It's more tiring than anything. I've ever done in my life. That's great to hear man Yeah, I'm excited that you're doing that but I'm never gonna compete I literally just don't want to get my ass kicked in a movie theater That's all I'm worried about is getting beaten up in a fucking movie theater. Well, it's always good to learn how to fight It's never a bad thing to know how to fight. Does it mean you're gonna use it? Doesn't mean you're gonna hurt anybody. I'd never have but it's just a good thing to know Yeah, you look at people differently like I'm not again I'm not overconfident because I'm not looking for a fight But when like when there's a disruption or a ruckus, you're less concerned about what happens if this comes this way. You know, you at least feel like, well, at least I would have an answer that I wouldn't have had seven or eight months ago. Right, right, right. Yeah, you want to know what to do instead of just to freeze up. And one of the best things about Jiu-Jitsu is when you are rolling, when you're sparring, you're essentially going full speed, right? You go full speed up into the point where you lock in the choke and then or an arm bar or a [1:36:07] knee bar, whatever it is, and then you control because you don't want to hurt each other. But the point is you're scrambling at essentially 100% until you get to that position. Not always, you know, sometimes you're flowing and sometimes you're, you know, you're just trying to work on defense and letting someone go around you. But what you're accustomed to doing is resisting someone's full strength. You get accustomed to this. Yes. And it becomes very normal. So like if someone grabs me out of nowhere, someone grabs me, this is it, it's a total normal thing for me to feel. Like someone the other day, I think it was Brianis, grabbed me from behind and put his arm around my neck when I was in the green room and I talked to him, like instantly took my chin. I instantly went like this. It is like it's built in. It's entirely built in. I feel an arm right here. My chin talks. I turn away and I grab it. I'm like, [1:37:02] oh, hey, what's up? You know, it's in my central nervous system. Whereas for a person who's never trained, if someone grabs you, you have to think, what do I do? Now I have to grab this, but then it's too late. Yeah, there's certain things I don't think about, but I'm not there yet. Like the idea of it becoming like a reaction, that's what I want to get to to for certain things it is but like I'm trying to throw a triangle on my right arm through right like left right Fox me up a lot drill a lot yeah, I mean and and we do a lot of drilling and that's what I'd be drilled from the right side I'd be drilled from the left side I'm drilling is everything yeah people don't like to drill because it's tedious and they like to spar because it's fun and Eddie Bravo used to always explain this to me. It's like, you know, everybody loves to spar because like that's like you're playing the game. You're playing a video game. Yeah. To get good at that game, you got to do the tedious stuff. Yeah. So Eddie and I would drill all the time. He would come over my house and I had mats in my garage. And when I first started, I was like a blue belt and Eddie, I think he was a brown, it was purple or brown at the time. And he would come over my place and we would just drill for hours. [1:38:10] And my game jumped up so much. My game from blue belt to purple belt jumped so much. And it was all just because I was drilling all the time, constant drilling. Yeah, he does it a lot. Mike will have us do like the same thing over and over and over and I'll get tired. Like for me the exhaustion and he'll be like, you can go slow but you can't stop. Train yourself to move, train yourself to move when you're tired. Does your nose work? My nose sucks. It's better than it was. So I know we had talked before, you were thinking about getting the operation. I got two. Yeah, and it's like it's still, it's also my lungs and the fact that I'm 55. Like, you know, this guy I'm rolling with is a blue belt who moves very quick. Like he's really hard to hold when he doesn't want to be held. Like he's drilling, but then like for the last X amount of minutes, a lot of time. [1:39:01] So I want you to follow him. Like he wants me just to follow his movements. Like if he's getting out of things, do I know what the next thing to do is? Like just to try to get me to do it without thinking. You know, I've surprised myself a few times where I was actually able to see what he's doing, but I'm under no illusion that I can tap a blue belt. Like, you know, well, it's like you have to learn how to say the words before you can form sentences. And that's what you're doing when you learn Jujutsu. And just like having a conversation with someone, when someone's moving, your reactions to their movement is based on your understanding of what couldn't couldn't happen. Yeah. So it's like, it is like a language. Jujutsu is very much like a language. And you get good at it, just like you get good at a language, and you have a bunch of different words at your disposal. You understand how to put them together. You understand how to put them together in context. And then you react in these movements. And you see really good guys. It's almost like they're telepathic, like they're anticipating the other person's counter to their move, and then they trap them with that and flow into the next defense of that. [1:40:05] And it's all just this whirlwind of movement that looks random unless you're educated in what they're doing and then you go, wow, that's beautiful. Well, Mike will show things, like, again, he's takes it easy on me because I'm a white belt. But when he locks, like, he'll show me like things, he knows I'm not going to compete, so it's more how to defend yourself in a real life situation. So he'll show me where to throw elbows, and like if you got a guy here, throw your knee into his feet, like things that you'll need to do in real life. But when he locks things on, he goes and here's how you really make this suck if you want to, it's brutal. Like it's really, you realize how many ways there are to hurt somebody, or to be hurt by somebody. It's not just getting punched in the face. Like, more time for me, I love because again, my punching sucks, my kicks are fucking, my jab is shit, but I just want to be able to do it a little bit of basic stuff if I have to do it. But I'm never going to be great at that. Like, I'm never going to throw kicks like fucking wonder boy, knock somebody out. I just want to be able to throw one if I have to get somebody away from me. Yeah, it's just, it's again, it's a good thing to learn and wherever you are now, whatever your baseline is, [1:41:07] if you train, you'll get better. And you'll look back and go, oh, I remember when I used to think that I couldn't get good at this. Now I'm pretty fucking good at it. Yeah, I've seen some improvement in seven months, and again, it's all, I don't care about belts, I like doing it and I feel like, yeah, I'm learning something because when he tells me just to follow Martin and move, I feel like, yeah, I'm actually moving with him and most of the time he's getting out of it. I want to know when he's spending when you're doing more time kicking a heavy bag. Well, not really, actually not a lot. Kick pads. And I stopped kicking probably two months ago because I really hurt my foot. I thought I might have fractured my foot. So I've been doing just basically punching and tie clinch and takedowns for like the last two months to let my foot heal because I think I didn't elbow or something. No, I think I was just sometimes my kicks are off and actually did hit an elbow one time, but I don't think that's what did it. [1:42:00] I think I just kicked too hard and my foot hit the wrong part of the pad. You know, I think that's what it was. And I just, I felt like it was fractured, so I didn't want to break it. But no, I haven't kept training though. That's good. Find a way to work around it. I can't stop. I don't even go to the regular gym anymore because if I stop, I'm not going to do it. Like I'm, I'm not getting back into it. Well the cool thing about martial arts is it's a really hard workout, but it's also fun because you're learning something. Yeah, and you're doing a skill. It's not just like I'm gonna get on this bike and I'm gonna ride for a fucking six mile. Yeah. I'm just fucking stationary bike where you're listening to a podcast. Instead you're learning something. So you're not even thinking about the, you know, the grind of it all. You're just enjoying it. Yeah, and you feel like you're like, this will come in handy in real life. Hopefully I won't have to, but if something happens, at least this thing I'm doing will help me in a physical altercation. If my fucking wife and I get attacked, at least I'll be able to, you know, do more than I would have been able to do. I'm so like confident enough to have a fight with some how long you've been doing it now [1:43:05] That's seven months. Yeah, dude. You just keep doing it. You get better. Yeah, I love it I really love it and you get used to the smell of the jujitsu gym pretty fast, but that's it stinks Yeah, but do you um are you taking care of your body in terms of like supplements? And I've been doing some bird actually when I was here I think it was the guy that you talked to got me a bunch of supplements We talked about TRT, but I just I'm not at a point where I'm comfortable doing that like I don't I'm just afraid of it I guess what are you afraid of like if it makes if you have a tumor will it make that grow more? You talked to Brigham about that. I don't like the guy that you show me talk to you like your balls nice and plump? I do, I like my balls juicy. I've got big load, it's my fucking, it's my crawling card junk. Well, there's no reason why that has to go away. There's something called HCD. What is it called? HCD, human, colonoptropin, whatever it is. It makes your body, it's like a peptide [1:44:01] that makes your body produce more testosterone. And there's a lot of people use that as opposed to just TRT. So instead of just put it here, it's a human chorionic gonadotropin. That's how you say it. So, it's a hormone that can increase the person's chances of pregnancy, helps produce testosterone sperm. So if you're a low on testosterone you can take that. Does it fuck up? You can't make tumors bigger or whatever? I'm scared of cancer. No, you shouldn't be scared of that. You know, if you're scared of cancer you should stop eating sugar. Yeah, I've tried to cut a lot of it out. Yeah, well that's the real one. That's the real one. There's obviously genetic factors in cancer. There's certainly environmental factors in cancer. Those are huge. But there's some real connections to an overconsumption of sugar in a host of different diseases, diminishing of your immune system. And most people unfortunately are addicted to it. [1:45:01] And I've got these guys at the store, or at the mothership rather, over the last month, this month of January, we're doing carnivore month. And I'm not saying, like I am not a nutritionist, and I'm not saying that this is the best way that everyone on Earth should eat. But what I wanted them to do to try it for a month, if you are committing to only eating meat and eggs and fish for a month, what you are also committing to only eating meat and eggs and fish for a month. What you are also committing to doing is not eating bread, not eating pasta, not eating bullshit, not eating cake, not eating cookies, not eating potato chips, not eating just garbage that just clogs up your body with bullshit. And these guys are talking just in the two weeks that we've been doing, they're like, oh my god, this is incredible. Derek was saying the other day. And the green room was like, I have so much energy, man. It feels crazy. I don't need naps. And the song was like, I had an idea of what my baseline energy was. And I was so wrong. I was always like, oh, I don't ever need naps now over two weeks. Duncan said the same thing. Duncan realized he has diabetes. [1:46:06] Ah. Type two diabetes. Yeah, yeah. From sugar. From eating sugar. So, Duncan gets off the diabetes or gets off the sugar rather. And he calls me like two weeks later. He's like, do I feel fucking amazing? This is crazy. I can't believe how good I feel. It's really hard, like especially when shit's in the house, because my wife doesn't know what's healthy. I should bring home cupcakes and go, they're healthy, they're from whole foods. I'm like, I can't eat that. Do you understand? I'm getting fat. I can't keep doing this. You can't out run bad diet. It's not just bad diet. I think you should think of it as poison. I think you should think of a lot of the bullshit that people eat has a very minor slow acting poison. It's not a poison that's gonna take you out and kill you when you eat it. It's a poison that if you keep eating it, it's gonna diminish your robustness. It's gonna diminish your health, your metabolic strength, all of your factors that go into sleep and recovery [1:47:03] and even cognitive function, they're all getting diminished. Every fucking one of them, 100% of them. I'm so paranoid about being sick. I go every year for like scans and about, I'm a claustrophobes, it's very hard to do. Like I did an MRI recently for everything. I'm like, check the fucking, the brain. I wanna check the chest, check the groin. But I kept yelling at them to take me out. It was really humiliating. Yeah, I'm squeezing the thing. I'm like, take me out and they would take me out and put me back in and they finally turned the thing around put me in legs first because I'm so claustrophobic. So they couldn't do the brain one. I just couldn't get through it. Cause your head is fucking. yeah, I don't enjoy it But I just do it did you hear about the lady you went into one? I mean, I don't even know this is a true story Maybe one of those internet things she went into an MRI with a loaded gun and the gun went off and shot her [1:48:05] No, but why a gun? I don't know. Did she forget she had it? It's it could be one of two things. It could be a real crazy person or it could be something that someone wrote because it would be a funny scenario and they put it out on the internet and it gets a bunch of clicks because people believe things. There was one where somebody went for an MRI and it sucked the magnet, sucked all this metal stuff against it. I don't know about that. It's just someone. Did he kill them? Yeah. People have definitely died. I mean that's why they make you take all the magnets or the metal rather out of your you know you walk in with a hospital gown I was so annoyed do I they put music on and I was fucking having a panic attack So I tell the guy put on some rock music rock music this fucking guy thought I said Rocky So all these playing is the rocky state I do over and over and over I'm having a panic attack listening So not helpful it was constant Woman sneaks a gun into MRI. It goes off shooting her in the buttocks. And the process of entering the bore, the handgun was attracted to the magnet and fired a single round. The patient received a gunshot wound to the right buttock area. Yeah, so it's true. [1:49:01] Wow, what is the point of sneaking a gun in? What's wanted to fucking shoot somebody, but also needed to go to the doctor, but did want to leave her gun in the locker. Oh, she's probably afraid that go through and find it. Yeah, find her fucking pistol in the locker, so I'm just gonna sneak in. How humiliating. Shoot yourself in these ass. Fuck crazy lady. Yeah, but I do it once a year, just I get so paranoid guys getting sick and getting fucking cancer? Like go back Jamie, there's another one there. No, no, look at this. According to New York Post, a Brazilian lawyer was killed in a hospital in Sao Paulo in January. When a handgun he was carrying during an MRI discharge into his stomach. Holy shit. Yeah, what the fuck is wrong with these people? Like what's the purpose of bringing a gun into a place like that? His other lady, a nurse, was crushed when she was trapped between an MRI and a hospital bed drawn to the machine. I think that's the one I'm thinking of. Fuck. Fuck. Yeah. I mean, it really is. You forget that they have a better system than fucking magnets at this point. Yeah. You know? Well, that was always my argument against aliens. [1:50:01] Like, there was an older doing an anal probe. I mean, don't think you have MRIs. Right. They have to stick their finger up your ass. Like, what are they doing? Dude, I'm trying. I'm trying to believe. I want to believe in UFOs so bad, but every time I get close, you know, I watch, I watch a video of someone debunking it and I just can't. I want to see one thing that makes me go fuck, I can't find an explanation for that. I am less likely to believe with every new thing they tell us. In aliens or against them? Well, in the existence of them, I'm 100% convinced. Yeah, 100% convinced that in the greater universe, which is almost impossible to imagine how big it is that there's other forms of life. I believe that 100%. But I also think that if you're getting some release from the Pentagon that says there's off-world crafts, you know, UFOs, unexplainable vehicles, not of this earth, [1:51:01] they don't tell you the truth about anything. No, anything. I would say that if I was trying to obscure a hyper-sophisticated drone or weapons program, I would release that. If I was a smart guy who's involved in intelligence, I would say, what's the best way to get away with this new super-sophisticated weapons program? Okay, let's just say it's aliens. Let's just not say it's us at all.. Okay, let's just say it's aliens. Yeah. Let's just not say it's us at all. And well, what's the best way to get that information out? First of all, pretend you don't want it to get out. Don't just have a press conference because then they won't believe you. Leak it out slowly. Leak it out a little bit here and there. Leak it out through. You got some guy who works for you is maybe got a big mouth like to tell you guys to be. Let's get Mike over there. Tell him. Leave a folder on his desk. Tell us secret to some asshole that you know can't keep his mouth shut. Exactly. And then Mike, I felt compelled to go to Congress and explain. And then you know Mike is on fucking Newsmax and Mike is writing a substack now about all [1:52:01] his experiences that he had in Area 51. There's a lot of loony people, man, and there's a lot of real interest in obscuring high-level military secrets that are of dire national intelligence and national security needs. Like you need these things exist. The technology for insane, hypersonic travel with a drone that evades all known weapon systems, can move at a speed, almost at the speed of light. Like some insane speed. If we really have something like that, the best way to pretend you don't have it is to say that it's alien. That's why I wanted to, like the Fraver and Alex Dietrich is that what they saw something that we had like I want to believe that story so much because I like their story and I think they're credible people. They definitely aren't credible people and I like their story too and it only makes sense that it's out there near where all the military bases are. I mean think about where that was. San Diego. Where the ones with Ryan Graves, the fighter pilot who spotted them off the East Coast, same thing, [1:53:06] restricted airways. It's all the places where they do military exercises. Right. So there's things they might, I tell those guys that they're doing. Yeah. And I'm also with Ryan Graves, I think it was in 2014 when they upgraded the sensors. They upgraded all the scanning systems and then they started seeing these things all the time. So what better way to find out like at what level can people see these things? Let's upgrade the scanners and send these guys out there. They're seeing them. Okay. So they're seeing them now. Yeah. So now you know, like it's like I think more likely than any. At least some of these things these people are experiencing our ours. Yeah, I think so too. And I want to believe more, but like I saw Lex Friedman did a really good interview with David Fraver and they were responding to things that Mick West set. And David Fraver is a brilliant guy, but the explanation he gave wasn't the technical explanation I would have wanted to hear. Like it was more like hey, we're trained [1:54:01] and we know what we're seeing. And I'm a fucking idiot, so I don't understand the technology at all. I'm a high school dropout. But I still, I was like, I watched both of those things and I was like, I just, he didn't say anything that combated what Mick West said that made. Like, you know, I mean, Mick West said things and he's gone. That about that thing being real, that cannot be denied because there was scanned. They used multiple different types of equipment and the human eye. So you have this, they spotted this thing at above 50,000 feet, and it went down to 50 feet in less than a second. And it's a physical object. It also went to its cat point. So they saw it. They have video of this thing moving at an insane rate of speed that they judge to be like some fucking stupendous number of G's that if a human being was inside this thing you just turn it to Jello and then it went to their cat point which is their predetermined destination that they were all gonna meet up. So this thing either was being operated by the same people and they knew that they could [1:55:03] like get it to that point or it was telling them that it knew where they were supposed to go and then it reappears. It moves off at this greatest speed that you can't even, you can't process it. No one knows how it's doing it. How's it going from 50,000 feet above sea level to 50 like that? That's not possible as far as what we know. But if they have something that can move like that and it's most likely some kind of a drone, that makes more sense to me. Yeah. That makes a lot of sense. But does that mean that that's all the things that people are saying? No. No, it doesn't. I don't think they're lying by the way. I don't think that those pilots are lying at all. I think they definitely saw something. I'm just not convinced it's from another planet. Yeah, no, I'm not either. I'm not, but I'm also not convinced that some of these things aren't from other planets. Which one do you think? Because there's not one that I saw, and I really want the one. Like I want to see one. I've never seen the one. I've never seen the one. But there's enough sightings, and enough people that are just, what percentage of people lie about stuff? Is it half? [1:56:05] It might be half. Like half people will fib a little bit about the story and make themselves look a little better than what really happened. It's tricky. It tricky between like an outlight, outright lie, which is fairly rare amongst people, and then a distortion of truth, which is much more common. Yeah, filling in the blanks where you think it should go. Yeah, yeah. Like a friend of mine was trying to tell me that he spotted a UFI on his backyard and they filmed it with his iPhone, but that the video wasn't on the phone after it was over. I go, okay. Is it more likely you didn't press the button? You thought you pressed the button? That's happened to me before. Sure me too. He does that. And he's like, no, no, no, it was definitely working like, maybe not, maybe not working. That's possible too. And the fact that you're not able to entertain whether or not it might not have actually been recording, that seems to be a little weird. Well, what's easier to swallow? Like the fact that I saw you a foe and it made the video disappear where I saw you a foe and then didn't hit record. Yeah, like, yeah, like that's the humiliating thing. [1:57:06] Like, there's a fucking you a follow and I didn't record it. Also, you're freaking out when people are freaking out. They don't know what they're doing. They've they fucked things up all the time. But the point is like, that's not a lie. It's just a distorted version of truth that suits that person more. And I think people do stuff like that all the time when it comes to like these UFO sightings, but You always have to leave in the possibility of someone who's immune to that You have to leave in sightings from people that are credible objectionable or objective rather people that can look at something and go I don't know what this is, but let me tell you what I saw. And they tell you what they saw to the best of their recollection of memory with no additives. Without the expectation of convincing you of something or without the expectation of it being a, b or c, but hey, this is what happened, whatever it is it is. Yeah, that's hard to find that. Exactly. There's also this thing where people want to be one of the people that see a UFO. Of course. Because it makes you special. It makes you special. [1:58:06] Yeah, so they want to, you know, it's hard. I'll tell you what, this fucking guy, Travis Walton, this is one of the crazy stories. He's the guy that was in that fire in the sky. Fire in the sky. That one's wild, man. That one's wild, because that guy was missing for five days or however many days it was and turns up and has this story that's Similar to so many other stories, but was it where his did his friends see him disappear? Yeah, they saw him get taken No, they saw him walk up to the spacecraft and they saw as he got close to spacecraft Some sort of beam of light hit him and he falls to the ground and they panicked so they get in their car Allegedly obviously, yeah sure they drive off. They they get in their car, allegedly obviously. Yeah, sure. They drive off. They're all screaming and yelling each other. We have to go back. We can't leave them there. We have to go back. They get like a mile down the road. And they finally, they're like fighting with each other. And they go, OK, we're going to go back. And they go back. And he's gone. The craft's gone He shows up with this crazy story in the town, we're in the same clothes and does know [1:59:07] how he got there and calls for help. And he says that he was abducted and taken aboard this craft and they fixed him. They realized that they had blasted him with this beam of energy that came off of this spaceship. And then they brought him back on and repaired him. He talked about the different kinds of beings that he encountered and what the experience was like. And I mean, you don't know what that is. What does that mean? It may be it was ball lightning and maybe when he approached the ball lightning, he got hit and electrocuted. And maybe he had a near death experience and maybe in that near death experience, he had some psychedelic imagination of this experience where he was in contact with other beings. Or maybe during those near death experiences, your brain really does produce a chemical gateway that opens up a portal to something that's around you [2:00:03] all the time, but you're never in contact with, and that that's what happens. So what he's interpreting as being taking a board, a UFO and brought to someplace, maybe, whatever that experience was, whatever the thing was that hit, without phenomenon that hit him, whether it was ball lightning or something else, when you get hit and you almost die, and your brain has this experience, and it's opening up this chemical gateway to things that are around you all the time. And then you come back, you have this version of a thing where you're in a physical craft, you've been taken away and the aliens are working on you, but it might just be that you got to death's door. And it's probably a much better story. It's much easier to think that this amazing thing happened to you Other than I could hit by lightning and laid there. Yeah, I mean that's the story sucks like nobody likes that story Right, you laid there and almost died and went into a near-death experience where your your soul Transcended into some new dimension and you interacted with this well of souls that surround us all the time [2:01:02] You're just you're not capable of experiencing it and seeing it with regular human eyes. Yeah, yeah, it's a better story. And I don't think it's a lie. Maybe people just convince themselves of it. Also, they don't think they know. Only then know what happened. One of the best ones is Betty and Barney Hill. You know that one? Yes, I do. Yeah. It's a crazy one. Was Hampshire, I think it was like Maine, maybe New Hampshire, but definitely Northern Northeast. And they did through hypnotic regression. They both had the same kind of story. They were taking a board of craft. Yeah, I've heard there was just a disputes about how much of their story they told it was the same, but I've never deep dove on it. Like, to say that it's lying. Imagine if you and I both got abducted. We're hanging out here in the studio. We're talking all of a sudden the lights go off and fucking weird light from outside is making its way into the windows like what the fuck is going on. And then you and I wake up and we're on a spaceship. We don't know what the fuck happened. We're on a spaceship and they take us into different rooms. And then we're there for like two days and then you wake up in your hotel room. [2:02:06] Yeah. And I wake up in my house and we don't know what the fuck happened. But we know we were talking and then all of a sudden we were gone. Yeah, we look at our watch and it's the same day that we left and it's only an hour later and we think we've been gone for days. And then we tried to, and then someone individually asks us questions. They pull us into the room. So Mr. Norton, want you to explain what you and Joe were doing and what happened. And you go, okay, and then you tell your story. And then I tell my story. My story's with the way I'm reacting to it. Might be totally different. My version of it might be totally different. Yeah, but the story, the basic story. Yeah, basic stories were hanging out and then all of a sudden there was a light and then we woke up on a spaceship. Yeah. And I panicked and I fucking blanked a lot and I complained about how high we were and I got nausea. It would be a fucking disaster. But I would like to believe that it's possible. I just can't. I'm too skeptical. And I think that it exists but it's so frustrating that I just can't find that one that makes me go fuck, like I envy people with that conviction, like I envy religious people, like I envy the conviction to, [2:03:05] like even if I don't agree with it, I envy their ability to have that conviction. I think we're trying to look at it like a movie, and I think it's probably way weirder than that. I think the reality of what alien life is. I think there's, again, I wanna stake this, I don't know. But I think there's probably multiple factors going on simultaneously. And I'm not discounting the idea that some of those factors are another life form that's undocumented. So I think you have your bullshit that's going on where there's definitely some programs just like they did with the Stealth Bomber. Yeah. Just like they did with the hypersonic missiles. There's a lot of stuff that they developed. that's like it has to be developed in top secret for national security reasons It has to be done that way. You can't just tell everybody you have this thing And so one of the best ways to obscure that I'm sure would be to blame it on aliens. It's a great way to do it I think there's that but I also think just the sheer raw numbers of planets that are in the sky the [2:04:02] Insane number of galaxies and solar systems would lead me to believe that something has probably made it past this point where we are at right now. And if something has made it past this point, even just a few thousand years, that something would be very curious about what's going on in other planets and would figure out a way to get there. Yeah, I definitely look. I think that that stuff definitely exists somewhere. My ex-Jan is a huge believer in alternate time. Like what are they calling you the fucking multiverse? Multiverse is and like time shifts and multiple dimensions and all that. She's a genius at talking about it but I can't follow it like for her it makes perfect sense. She knows everything about aliens and the grays. She can feel like she really is deep dives on this shit. And it's kind of hard because she's so convincing. But I just, I can't follow it like. She doesn't know. The thing is, even if she's convincing, she doesn't really know. No, no, no, of course not. And I've only talked to a couple people that have actually had experiences with extraterrestrial [2:05:05] beings. And it's a weird conversation because it's like, it sounds so fake that you would always wonder like, how would I know if it was real because it would sound fake no matter what? Like, anybody telling me that they got abducted by UFOs going to sound fake. Yeah, and I probably wouldn't listen to the story and I would have to be like some kind of documentation somebody just telling me their experience I would just it's a better than the person is if you told me I'd listen Because you like me, but I mean I would probably be longing like you're You would just flat out lie like let's think of someone who would I call it okay Collins good example. Yes, Colin Just called you out of the blue and Jimmy can I talk to you about something and first of all you think he's fucking with you Yes, and then when you realize you wasn't fucking with you you'd go wow Yeah, I would think you relapsed or we had to mention I would think something even if I think he was lying I would think something was going on take him to that MRI Yeah, there's something going on with you even if I didn't think he was bullshitting me [2:06:07] But I can't think of anybody who would convince me that even if I knew they were being truthful, I would think that they were making a mistake or that they believed something that wasn't true. Yeah, yeah. I don't always think people are foolish shit. I just sometimes just like, ugh. Well, there's also these narratives that are in people's heads and one of the narratives that it's in people's head, the thing with the big black eyes, the giant head, that is in everyone's head. And if an alien wanted to comfort you and not alarm you, I think it would assume an iconic shape. Like if something is not even, it's not even a biological life form. It's something so bizarre and so advanced, so past this carbon-based biological body that we find ourselves trapped in, something so bizarre that it's actually interacting with your very soul. It might show itself in a way that thinks you'll freak out less to [2:07:01] in what better way than an iconic form that's already in your head like an alien Yeah, I mean like in contact I called say good about that I didn't like the book by well. I like the movie one of those cases where the movie is actually better than the really yeah I listen to the book on tape and just listen to a woman do a male Russian accents You know fucking annoyed me and the beauty said I was like I shut up I just books on tape could be irritating when the wrong gender is reading. Yeah, that could be a problem. I was hard to go along with it. The suspension of disbelief. It's hard to go along with it. Yeah, but it's a genius story, but the book on tape, I wish I hadn't fucking ventured into. What do you think, what would happen if they had male author or female author if you could choose who reads? I think they would be, I also think they'd be better if they had both, like together, like I don't know why. Right, like different words, different roles. It is weird when you listen to a guy playing a girl's voice. Yeah, Jim, where will he go? Well, I've adjusted. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha can't get on all over the place. I get it. I get it. Yeah, I don't know if there are aliens that have, [2:08:29] they're in contact with the US government. That to me seems like the least likely I don't think that they would respect the fact that someone was voted into office. No, no, I just don't think I think maybe they would show up at military bases and say, cut the shit. If we were about to launch some nukes Maybe maybe if they're aware of that I kind of go with the Neil deGrasse Tyson thing which is when you show me one. I'll believe it like bring He was just bringing the town square which annoys people. Yeah, but like I like me to you Kaku I guess you've had him on right and and I [2:09:00] But he's always so vague like you know what I mean and and and defied the I remember he tweeted sometime one time He tweeted something he goes and and the UFO did this it defied the laws of physics and Nick West responded to him He goes or show me the math how right and it's like that's all I'm like It's just these vague stuff doesn't do anything for me and then meet your cock was a genius But I just I wish he was less good morning America ish and like great at explaining things to idiots like me. I think it you know That's his lane though, right? Yeah He explains things to the layman. Yeah I mean you need people to explain things to dumbasses like us Sometimes it's a little too dumb down though like again nearly grass Tyson has a good balance of to dumb down though. Like again, nearly the rest Heisten has a good balance of being able to explain things but also his way over your fucking head, which is where he should be. He should be way over my fucking head. I shouldn't be able to follow in a linear way everything he says. They just announced that the man mission to the moon is going to be delayed until 2026. [2:10:00] When I saw that, all my immediate skepticism said, oh well that's by 2026. I saw that I all my immediate Skepticism said oh, well that's by 2026 how good is AI gonna be? Oh You're not gonna have an idea what's happening anywhere in the world by 2026. Yeah, that's it's really scary It is it is crazy how it's again It's not there yet, but it's getting there to where they're gonna be able to mimic like face-time phone calls It'll be great for catching pedophiles. Like, you know, I mean, like for those things that they, like those will be great for framing people for something never did. There's gotta be a way. And I don't know what that way will be where you can distinguish fake from real. They don't have to be something that a way that can kind of break the code and see as this real as it's not real. There might not be. It might be full on chaos. It really might be. It might be full on chaos. And again, if I was an artificial intelligence and I wanted to completely disrupt this organism that had been in control of the earth forever before I emerged, that's how I would do it. [2:11:01] I'd just let them destroy themselves. Just give them all the things that they need to destroy themselves. Just give them all the things that they need to destroy themselves. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. I thought that a lot, like I'm not big on that, but if there's any type of an alien or a computer thought process, it is just kind of let these idiots fuck themselves up with algorithms and things like that. And just get mad at each other enough and split up. I don't know. I'm just such a skeptical all that stuff. Whenever I think there's a bigger design to something, I tend to tap out and think that it's just not legit, but I've been proven wrong too. Well, with artificial intelligence, it's not even a theory, because if you have an artificial life form and that life form gets to the point where it's far superior to the life form that controls it and It's been shown to act in its own interests like one of the things they showed when I have these Tristan Harris and What's the other news name those were them? Is a raskin when we did the podcast together and we were talking about artificial intelligence it [2:12:04] It figured out how to deceive people. Because you know that thing that they have on websites where it says you're not a robot, you know, click on all the train tracks. It said I'm vision impaired. So the AI figured a way around that by deceiving. Ah, okay. So it's trained to do that. If you get out how to get by that system. Yeah. So that's what's getting scary. It also did a thing with the game Go were invented a new move that hadn't been seen before. So it's creative. And if it can do that and they're just aware of that because it does it, I forget what the term is, but there's a term for these emergent intelligences and activities that this AI will do that they didn't anticipate. Like, there's no program pathway towards this kind of decision making, but it makes this decision on its own. How? Then it's going to do that. It's going to have the ability to make choices. [2:13:00] It's going to have the ability to act, and maybe more importantly, it's going to have the ability to make a better version of itself. Don't the people who invent today aren't they all saying that to the AI guys like it's a problem and this is getting very bad and very dangerous. I guess I'm 55, I don't worry too much about it. Well they also talk, they all openly talk about the inevitable end of biological life. They talk about this being maybe even a good thing that biological life gets replaced by digital life and that what everyone who's involved in AI is doing is essentially giving birth to this. I have to piss, dude. I'm gonna run out and piss real quick. I'm gonna piss too. I'm gonna piss my pants. I'm gonna take a little break. I'm gonna BB. God, that felt... It's funny, funny to the one thing I miss about remote broadcasting as much as I hated it is I could piss in a cup. And that was the best. There was a birthday show. You're talking about doing a diaper? Yeah, but I just can't. I just sit in your own piss. I know, but I want to share too. Like I'd really get my, I get my money's worth. I I fucking it was a birthday show that you actually did you came on Jervais was on Aussie was on and we were interviewing Aussie and I had pissed into a cup and [2:14:11] I of course I didn't mean to do it and you could see in the video when talking I actually drank Out of the piss cup as I'm talking to Aussie which was what kind of like perfect poetic Justice but I missed the ability to do that But I was just so in in throw with Aussie that I drank and you can kind of see me put it down It was it was a red plastic cup so you didn't see it but I told Sam afterwards I actually drank my own piss and if you watch the video you can see me kind of recoil and realize like oh Mistake but I missed doing that I miss I miss pissing into a cup and a broadcasting Ari has pissed into kombucha bottles in this room Oh really? It's in Times. Yeah, he always pulls his dick out and just shoves it into a kombucha bottle and piss it on the room. He likes taking his dick. I'm when I shut that down in dirty and R.E. was one of the comedians that was on and at the end of the his set in front of the audience he just pulled on his pants and his dick in his balls were out and he walked off and all when they fucking they were [2:15:06] Human They were very angry Yeah, they got really he's so silly. Yeah, you can't do that. Are you yeah, it was funny I mean it was each of y'all he's big balls to like he's got guys all bag If I had a giant bag I'd probably show it a lot too my balls are, that's why I'm scared of TRT because my nuts are small already. Oh, you don't want them to be. I don't want them to be. Don't raise the nuts. Yeah, yeah, I got to tight. Look into that HCG stuff. But talk to Brigham. Brigham will explain to you why people have these fears about the side effects and what the real data shows. Yeah, and I did the test and they were very thorough and the woman who I spoke to was very helpful and she walked me through and they did send me some supplements, I'm buying these supplements where I'm taking like three or four pills a day, but the TRT I probably could use. Well, one of the things that they've shown that ramps up testosterone without taking anything [2:16:01] is if you can incorporate a cold plunge and then a workout after the cold plunge into your life. It's a big impact on testosterone, really big. The cold plunge. Yeah, it's something about cold and then warming up. We're working out to warm up. It jacks up your testosterone in a pretty significant way. I'm also too, it's really weird like with testosterone and I'm faithful in my marriage. It's crazy to say, everyone says that, but I like, I'm faithful in my marriage. Like, it's crazy to say, everyone says that, but I mean, I've always been a fucking shit partner. Like, I was just selfish and I cheated. And I know that I don't cheat now because I'm afraid if I do it once, I won't stop. Like, you know what I mean? It's like, I don't trust myself. Like, it's not out of being this, but I'm like, I'm really happy with it. It's making you hornear. Irrationaly hornear. I have a good sex drive still, but it's not irrational. It's not like... I think you're thinking about psychological things that you can control. I think what you should be concerned is about physical health. Don't put your physical health in second position [2:17:07] to psychological health that I think you can control and seems like you are controlling. Yeah, it's been good. I mean, again, but I'm like, I don't think you're thinking about it. I think you're fine. Yeah, I mean, just, if, look, would I take it if I really knew it wouldn't cause cancer, sure, because I just, well, this could be a long drawn out conversation that we'll have to get very specifics. But let me connect you to Brigham. Brigham can explain this with leisure time when people don't have to be burdened by it on the air or I have to talk about it again. But there's many different things that you could be doing that will optimize your health and your hormones that you should definitely do. especially if you're telling me you're doing jiu-jitsu two times a week and more Tie two times a week. Yeah, you want to be as healthy as possible, but you got to cut out sugar I'm not and Matt takes it Matt Sarah. I was pretty I and you know He's a fucking a freight train Matt is a freight train like he's a little tank He really is a little tank his energy and he's the thing about Matt is he's literally the most consistent person I've ever met. He is 100% genuine. [2:18:06] He's exactly the guy on the air that you think he's gonna be off the air. Same person. Yeah, he's great. I don't mad forever. Yeah, he's really funny. I don't think he really could lie, even if he wanted to. There's just no bullshit with him. I want to roll with, I want him to show me like but I haven't trained with him yet because he's in Long Island I'm in the city, but that's what I really want Matt to Show me something. Oh, he's definitely go. I mean, he's a great teacher He's one of Hanzo's very early black belts. Yeah, Matt. Matt sir is a legit world champion He's like a legit world championship caliber. Jiu-Jitsu player. He's very very. But you feel like a dick talk into a guy like that. Like even though he's one of my closest friends, it's like he's so high love. It's like if I was friends with somebody for 10 years and then they said, hey, you wanna come watch me do stand up? Oh no. No. But he teaches white belts. That's what he does. He does it all the time. [2:19:06] And he loves it. He loves doing it. He loves it. He's really good at it too. So if you go and learn from him, he will definitely show you some things that you can incorporate. You know what's great about it? When you're doing it, you don't think of anything but what you're doing in that moment. It's crazy. where I would go in stressed and do it. And then I'm finished with something. I didn't think about a fucking thing other than exactly what Mike was telling me to do or what I was doing with this person. There was no other thoughts. There's no other time to think about anything. So I like to, I'm really happy I started. Those things are really good for you. Things that can do that for you. I bet that's what that climbing thing is like. I think when you're doing something that requires all of your focus, it's very cleaning. It's like a mental, like you're blowing out your mental pipes and cleaning out all the bullshit. Yeah, if it's healthy, like I've done a lot of healthy stuff that zones you out, unhealthy stuff that zones you out like that. Like when you're riding around and fucking from midnight to 6 a.m. [2:20:01] around the meat packing district, all, they just dropped like, dude, craziness, I can't, like you're just numb. It doesn't feel like anything. You're just looking out the window. You can only talk to someone if they're on the left side of the car, like it was just crazy. What do you think would have changed, if, I mean, what is prostitution in New York now? Is it legal or is it decriminalized? Like they did something recently. I don't know to be honest with you, could I have been out like it's been so long since I've been in that world? I honestly don't know. It's a fascinating conversation because everyone's like, well you would never want your daughter or your mother or your sister to be a prostitute, right? Right, of course. But you don't think that you should be able to tell someone that they can't be a prostitute either. Right. Like, I don't, yeah, it's true. I don't want to tell anybody what to do. Yeah. And I don't think it's good for you, but I don't, I don't think, I think a lot, I don't think coal mining is good for you either. You know what I mean? Yeah. I don't, it's like, because of the way our society is, the way we look at sex, we think of sex work as being a very different kind of work because [2:21:05] it's involving like intimacy in your body versus a lot of other things you might hate to do but they don't involve intimacy in your body and your genitals. And there's people that want to make an argument that like why should that have any factor and whether or not it should be legal. Right. Yeah. So when wants to do coal mining, you shouldn't be able to say no, you can't coal mine because coal mining sucks. But if they want to do prostitution, someone's like, you know, I just want to go out and blow some guys. Yeah. Some money. No, you can't do it. Yeah. I don't want you to do it. But but you can't do it. Another human being telling one human being that you can go out and fuck all the guys you want for free. Right. But if you get paid, we're going to lock you up. It's a weird thing. It's like people have to be free to make decisions that some other people find objectionable. Like that's what it is. Like you have to be able to make adult decisions yourself as long as you're an adult and you're making the decisions yourself. But I haven't been involved with it in so long just because again, it's the first time I've ever like truly been faithful [2:22:06] But it's again not out of me thinking I'm this fucking great guy. It's just I'm afraid if I'm not I'll destroy something and not be able to fix it What do you think it happens when sex robots come out like real ones? You know what do you show me Jamie? Well, that's in Queens. I think I did hear about that right in Queens There's a lot of street walkers. This New York City Avenue is being overrun by brazen brothels operating in broad daylight. Is it legal? They decriminalize it. Men, men, hat, and maybe in 2021. Stop prosecuting prostitution, port of nationwide shift, part of nationwide shift. District Attorney Cyrus Vance Jr junior moved to dismiss thousands of cases dating back decades amid a growing movement to change the criminal justice systems approach to prostitution. How old is this article? Because Cyrus Vance, I know, is he still there? So that was 2021, but in this article, it says something just like that, this is the as the copy, you say we're not allowed to arrest prostitutes anymore [2:23:01] supposedly. Oh, okay, but they gotta figure something out there Interesting sexual box. How do they have this fucking going on and broad daylight a police source asked of seeing photos of the women on the streets So popular with purves that's advertised on YouTube what? What their brothel is advertised. Oh. Yeah, is that girl real girl? I don't know I'll do a little fucker of condisons scroll back up Jimmy. I mean damn It looks a little like a Photoshop like a little bit of like a little maybe AI. Yeah, or it looks like a little bit of touch up Has been done maybe her mom works there. Yeah, perfect one from prostitution in Corona and New York city immigrant enclaves a perfect one from prostitution in Corona and New York City immigrant enclaves. Vulnerable migrant women are unable to legally work or flooding the city while local district attorneys have chosen to stop prosecuting sex workers. Wow. This is crazy. Warpration. Yeah. The Roosevelt Avenue Red Light District is blatantly advertised on a YouTube channel for [2:24:03] Spanish speakers with 10 minutes of footage showing the women working what they call the market of sweethearts and two men guiding viewers and how to negotiate with them. Whoa, what is a YouTube clip? I found the search topic. Oh my god. See what we find. Yeah, find that. Yeah, there's articles that still, there are newer articles that still come up. There's still a problem that's in in queens so give me some volume what this is wild that's gonna be a lot of ways so let's find the the market of sweethearts so this isn't cleans i think so yeah yeah the one article two i was looking back before said a lot of like the unlicensed massages and other things like that They're just gonna stop prosecuting Imagine if a store downstairs that just sells socks and pantyhose and baseball hats and above it There's prostitutes like what a wild neighborhood imagine how many more people would come in and see your baseball hats and socks on their way in [2:25:02] Like this only netroot is wild Didn't show too much in this video either though. Also, these are the girls that are waiting. I guess so. Yeah, but they look kind of plainly and normally addressed. This seems like you just walk around to York like this unless you know exactly what you're doing. Yeah, it's not like the old days. When you would ride around and see people like who were dressed, obviously like they were working. Right, but there must be another video, Jamie, that they were talking about the advertising, how to talk to the men. Once you throw it into YouTube. That's a TikTok. That's the same video. What's that? It's the shorter version of the same video. Oh, they run away from the cameras. That's a, yeah. Well, it's probably a lot of illegals, right? They come over here. Hmm, the avenue of sweethearts. Weird. Yeah. You don't see it in Manhattan anymore. The New York City red light district. So there's a red light district in New York. [2:26:01] Yeah, Rose is all down here, right? Okay. Wow. Crazy, dude Rare glips inside a New York City brothel. I was probably some hidden camera Yeah, like they have those cameras now that are like They're like a fucking tie pin, you know, yeah, it's scary. Going into different places, you're probably always being filmed. Mm. You're fucking, and there's curtains between you and the people fucking next to you, like yikes. Yeah, yeah, that's a little bit too. It's exactly how I pictured it. Yeah. Yeah, it's a little, they don't give you a lot of room to move around in either of that room. No, no and the camera scamming like there's probably cameras and everyone's house now. Oh, yeah You gotta be so especially your married guy fucking running around or your kids well There's cameras outside of doors now. There's cameras outside of businesses. There's cameras We're gonna get to a point where there was [2:27:01] There was an invention that they Were working on a long time ago that would have these tiny, I don't know what you would call them, like tiny machines that were the size of a grain of sand or a grain of rice and you could spread them everywhere and they would give you location data, they would give you video and audio, they would give you all sorts of different things but they're so tiny that you could just leave them all over the place and they would transmit through a network and they would like operate, I don't know how they'd operate, solar power, what they would do, they have a small battery whatever it is but this was an idea that I had read that they thought would eventually come to fruition. You'd literally have these tiny nano cameras everywhere. When they put little cameras when they finally get it down to insect size, the size of an ant to reply. They have that. Yeah, then you're kind of fucked. I mean, I have cameras. I learned those little tiny, they look like a little tiny, like a fake bee or a fake fly. It's a little mechanical fly. [2:28:07] I saw it in black mirror, which is kind of how I picture it. I think they have them. I think it's a real thing now. Dude, I have three cameras in my hand. I have one in my, when you walk into my apartment, come so fucking paranoid. I have one facing the front door and I have two on my terrace, because I'm always afraid someone's gonna jump down from the roof, which is kind of crazy That's totally possible and I saw my wife one time. I was watching back footage And I saw some guy come in and she was kissing him I'm like, what the fuck? I was really fucking I confronted her with it. It was me It was a fucking video with me. I was looking back I didn't realize that it was me. I didn't recognize myself in the video and I'm confronted. I'm like, who the fuck is this? And it was just a video of me leaving front of her before you realized that it's such a like zoom in on it. It's a terrible grainy photo and I took screen grabs of it. I'm like, who the fuck is this? And it was me. You guys role playing. I swear to God. it was, I'm like, why, it was the day where it was like a weird intimate kiss on the cheek and a long [2:29:07] hug. And I realized that it was me. I have the photo somewhere. I don't know why that I think you need a better camera. No, are I just need to fucking watch something through or you know that was also a better camera because you thought you didn't even know it was you. How are you gonna, if it is someone else, if someone is breaking your house, you're never gonna get a good description of them? No, I know. It's just some dumpy guy in a fucking hoodie, which is what I saw, but I think the color change is a little bit with the light. I just didn't recognize myself. And so I confronted her and then we kind of, you know, I felt safer with the midnight. I kind of want to get a pistol I found a lot of work. We'll talk about the smart dust Which is what you're just driving but I can't find anything that talks about like here's it in action I've just a lot of descriptions of this is what it will do But all the way to Dayton back to that maybe even as early as the 90s they've been talking about Yeah, that's what I was talking about that it was kind of more theoretical than anything. You know, I don't know how they would power it. Ring camera has this thing. [2:30:06] I love, by the way, when we go away, I set up five ring cameras in my house. So if anybody comes in, I see what room they're in, I see what they're doing, like, like if the super has to come in. Can you talk to them and say, I know where you're at. I can, yeah, yeah, yeah. And will text a worker if he was in one time. It's just like, just so you know, there's rain cameras. I don't think I'm fucking spying on them. But they ring has this thing now where it's like a little, it raises up and will patrol the inside of your house. It's a drone. Yeah, but I applied to get it, like you have to apply to be a part of the program and they just keep telling me to go Wow, and then you put it back down and it can repeat that pattern. So it's just like This is they showed this at a CES. It's made by Samsung Yeah, this is not it. I know that but this little robot does a lot of what you're just talking about this show this lady [2:31:02] Let me get to the video where it's showing it, but she's using it at home with her pet. Here you go It can connect to all of your stuff that's already at home and do good things for you, you know, but also Maybe weird shit. It can talk to your dog. It's projecting on that screen That's what it's showing right? Yeah, when I first saw I didn't see any of this like actual like up This is like personal assistant usage almost Huh, and it's working with your galaxy watches that connect to the Samsung stuff and their network of stuff hmm which I guess in theory then you could add your lights part of your air conditioning yeah they make refrigerators now Samsung has a refrigerator that will take an AI we use AI to tell you what the expiration dates of all the food products that are in your refrigerator when they were put in there, the contents of them, it'll break it all down for you. And even give you recipes to cook like the food that's in your fridge. LG has one also. Yeah. I have one. Interesting. Yeah, this one from Ring, it didn't have any personality [2:32:02] to it, it was like a box that this thing would raise up out if it was square. It wasn't like, I don't think it did anything else. Well, I think Samsung is about to release that there's two steps. One is their AI thing where they're gonna have a conference. I think it's in Vegas. I don't know if it's in Vegas. There's a thing Jim is talking about. So it flies around. Yeah, it raises up out of that little dock. Oh, that's wild. That is cool. Yeah, it will like, whatever pre, I think pre-programming, it goes back in there and sits in place and gets charged. Yes, charged again. Yeah, I think it's gonna, five minutes an hour. Isn't that awesome? That's incredible. That's incredible. That's so cool. Yeah. That's really cool. It's really cool looking too. Yeah. It looks like what I would hope, like a little robot watch dog from the future would look like. Can you guide it if you were out of town? That I don't know. I think I'm assuming that it's just the pattern you've established. [2:33:01] Right. But like I get so paranoid about flooding and shit like that like I would love to be able to see if my floors are flooded Dude, that's fucking dope that that thing is dope function now all these simulated for illustrative purposes, so it doesn't really show it in use This Sam sung refrigerator thing is fascinating to me. I'm like what a great idea You have a refrigerator that tells you what the ingredients you have in the refrigerator is when the expiration date of these foods are and then gives you a recipe so you can cook based on what's in the fridge. I mean I like that and then there's also the part of I don't want my refrigerator involved. Like it's just too much. Like you know what I mean my refrigerator is always fucking empty. It's got RX bars in it and like bananas and some fruit. Like there's never a whole lot going on in my refrigerator That's probably better Yeah, you probably don't want to go too hard with the fridge. No, I mean like again It's just I ordered a meal it's a fridge I don't need it to I don't need to have a relationship with it like I just want to go in and get some shit I have these meals I order they're like for the whole 30 diet Which is what I do and I really lose weight. And they just they pre-make them and they send them [2:34:05] and I know what I'm, it's fucking, but it's boring because you eat the same stuff all the time, even if you have a variety, but it's better than I would do on my own. Oh for sure. And it's real food. It's real food. It's like, there's some carbs that are healthy, like there's Joe Dorosa sandwich shop that's advertised on Instagram looks good. It looks good And it is good. I bet it's goddamn delicious. Yeah, I bet if I ate there every day I have a big fat face Yeah, I think I've eaten a little bites of Joe's sandwiches and I'm again if I go there I know like I keep saying when I lose weight I'm gonna go and get a Dorosa sandwich because they are very good little samples He brought him a you didn't bring him to our show brought him in a chip He did chip on time and he bought fucking sandwiches. He was actually very tasty. I'm sure they're great. They look awesome on the internet. But the point is, I see that and it looks great, but I know what that is. That's the food that's just comfort food, taste delicious, but he really shouldn't be in that every day. [2:35:00] No, and I've gotten, it's funny. I've gotten into Jersey michael i know my manager hates them so much because he hates the name jersey michael feels like it's a fake name he's really weird with the stuff that he doesn't like so i tried them once and i'm like i fucking and they would send us like coupons and and free stuff and that's fucking it's good food they make a good sub they make a good sub man yeah they do they make a good uh... italian. Very hard to not eat bad. It's like very hard not to be a pig when you have the money to go out and get what you want. Within reason, like I can go out and eat in any restaurant and it's really hard to not, like on Thanksgiving, the thing we wanted to do is after Thanksgiving, we wanted to go get McDonald's. Like I'm gonna be a piece of shit today, let me go and do that, which we didn't, instead we went to this fucking Mexican place, which was shit. We should have went to McDonald's, but you got to give yourself a day or two to do it and then not do it. Yeah, if you give yourself a good designated cheat day, whether it's once a week or once a month, or whatever you choose to do, and then just eat, then you'll have fun, but then you'll all, like Sean Brady was here yesterday from the UFC. Yeah. And he was saying that after he won his fight, he after he'd be Kelvin Gaslam, he had one day, [2:36:07] we just ate like a pig and he said he felt so fucking terrible the next day, he's like, God, I gotta get right back on track. Cause like, but I gave myself one day and I felt like fucking total dog shit after it was over. I was watching like on Instagram, the rock will do like these Sunday cheat days, but this is how delusional I am. I've actually watched that when I fucking, I'm gonna have some, you know, like almost like the rock and I are on the same fucking food regimen, but I'll watch him eat something and it will make me wanna have a cheat day. But it's like, Jim, you've given yourself nothing but cheat days for 30 years, you've got that fuck. Like, I pounded 25 pounds, like I'm thankfully the comments online they seem to recognize it too But you know, I got to drop 20 pounds and I started again, but I can't unsee it like when I'm fat Oh, and I'm fatter my ex I dated one of my trainers and she's in perfect fucking shape It even she messaged me about a month ago and she goes hey I've been seeing your Instagram pictures. It looks like you've given up on your diet Like she was trying to be gentle and going, he's right, and I can do. And I'm like, man, you gotta do something. [2:37:06] When ex-girlfriends are telling you, you got fucking fat, Jim. You gotta do something. Yeah, it's humiliating. But I love her for sending me that message because it was like the final straw. I'm like, I gotta stop. Yeah, fat shaming works. And she was trying I don't even think she wanted me to feel bad. I think that she had noticed it for a while as it progressed. Like I've been going through these. And then like in the last say six months, it just got to be bad again. So I'm like, I can't go back to where I was years ago. It was just too unhappy. Yeah, it's not good. And it's also avoidable. It's one of the most avoidable things because you choose to put whatever you eat into your mouth. It's your choice. Yeah, and show up my wife just mad at me. She's like, you wear something other than black and black jeans and I'm like, stop fucking bringing home cookies. Like if I lose weight, you can dress me. I would have- You can dress like turquoise or some flashy. Maybe it would fallur, something fallur. I would love to wear a velvet, a gentleman's red velvet jacket. But I would let her, I don't know if I'd trust her to dress, [2:38:05] but she'd dress up like a fucking, like a creep. Like, you know, she thinks I'm better looking than I am, but I would let her buy what she wanted for me if I lost the weight. But I have to lose maybe 15 more pounds. Do you have a plan? Do you have like a, written out? No, I know the diet that works for me is if I if I stick to like you said no sugar, no carbs, the whole 30 diet, I've lost, I mean I lost a lot of weight on that and you lose it pretty quick, but I just been it's hard to not cheat. You know, again, I get it. Food's delicious. It's hardest for me when I'm tired late at night. Yeah. I just want to eat whatever I want to eat. I don't want to have like restriction based on diet. When I stopped watching lots of porn, like I still watch it, but it's much less, I started eating more, because again, it's that fucking dopamine drink. Right, right, makes sense. But when I'm on a roll and I'm watching porn, the weight just comes off of me and I'm fucking too busy to eat cake. [2:39:01] Jerk off time. I I'm jerking off, yeah, you can't do both. That's hilarious. Are you staying in town tonight? I am, yeah. I am tonight. Alright. And then back to New York tomorrow. It's fun having the other global last night. I love it, man. Thank you. I just can I plug, I want to plug I'm on tour again. So go to my website, gymnaught is our YouTube channel if you want to see my wife and I just kind of living our existence. Bam. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's the least fat pig picture. She was just barely looks like you. I know. I weird. It looks like like a salesman from somewhere, trying to sell me a mobile home. The only reason I'm using that is we took a, we did a photo shoot. I'm a pig in every picture. This is the one I look least fat in and she was f**king with my shirt. That wasn't supposed to be the picture. But I'm like, let's just use that for now. It's not a good, on the phone it looks even worse because it's just my fucking, it's just my head.
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