Richard Rawlings Almost Got Arrested for Throwing a Burrito | Joe Rogan

Salut. Perfect. It's so good though. It is good. It's smooth. I like the cinnamon too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it's a party drink. Now for a real tequila enthusiast though, is that like sacrilege? Is that like an electric Mustang? Oh yeah. But that's what the monkey has always done. You know, it's like playing the golf thing. I decided to launch Gas Monkey Golf, apparel line. And so I'll be wearing my golf shirt out there and it's pretty crazy. It's got a skull and all kinds of crap or whatever. But whether I'm pushing the envelope as the monkeys or tagline is snapping tees and filling holes. Now when you bring that to the Country Club, do people say, Sir, that attire is unforgivable here. Oh yeah, for sure. I've been thrown out of my own Country Club plenty of times. Have you really? And I've bought a lot of golf carts because I've crashed one because I thought it was fun. And... You've been thrown out of your own Country Club? A bunch of times. Really? For what? Just raising too much hell. You know, I'm almost like the old Rodney Dangerfield movie scene. I was like, Sir, you can't do that in here. And I was like, ha, well I'm going to do it twice. Caddyshack. That's all time. Exactly. Now what do they say to you? Just, you know, they usually just take me home because, you know, I live on the course so they'll drive me down there. Oh, so you have a house on the course. I did. I live downtown in Dallas now, but the worst one was I decided to drive my Harley home on the golf course one night from it. On the grass? No, I stayed to the cart path. I'm not a complete asshole. But I did drive it home at about 1.30 or 2 in the morning, and my house is probably the furthest house from the clubhouse. And that thing is freaking loud when you're in that, you know, this trench of a golf course. Right. The cops were waiting on me when I got home. But thank God they were running the cops. I was like, you can't do anything. I'm going inside. Fake golf course cops. Yeah, yeah, you know, the community cops. Community cops. That's adorable. I had a good one for you. I actually got arrested at this country club, well, at my house for, I wouldn't say arrested because they ended up letting me go, but they did come cuff me and put me away. We're coming home from a Christmas extravaganza, which I do with my buddies every year right before Christmas. We go to the guard, pile in, and we go Christmas shopping for our families and what have you. Coming home loaded. I supposedly threw a burrito from like Taco Bell or something and hit the guard. So there's three or four of my buddies. We get to my house. We pig out on shitty Taco Bell food, you know, until everybody passes out. And the next thing I know, the cop lights are on banging on the door. Get out here. I come to the door going, why? You know, after you've been drinking, you do a bunch of food, you're fucking gone. And so long story short, they say, well, you're going to be arrested for assault if you don't go down and say you're sorry to this guy. A salt with a burrito? Correct, right? And by the end, so if you charge a man with a salt because he throws a burrito at you, you should, you should turn in your card. But we, we watched the tape. It was not like throwing it at him. It's not like a barreling with a baseball right here. I like chunked it to him to eat, but he didn't see it coming. So it like slapped him and fell down. So they, they cuff me and they take me down to the guard house. They cuffed you. Yeah. They put me in the back cop car cuffing. Fake cops. No, these are real ones. Oh, real cops. Yeah. He filed a report. And so this is how stupid it gets. By then I'm so fricking loaded, right? And I get there and the burrito is still on the ground like it's evidence or some shit. And they're telling me I got to apologize to this guy and all I can focus on is there's a perfectly good fucking burrito around here. I'm going to eat this burrito. I sit down and literally start eating the burrito. Oh, God. And they're like, please just tell him you're sorry so you can go back home. And I'm like, okay. So I tell him I'm sorry. I'm still eating the burrito. And they just left me there. Like a mile from my house at the car shack. You walked home a mile drunk. Do you see the guy since then? Oh, gosh, no. I was like, dude, that was perfectly. I mean, back, this was in the days before the sprinters were so popular. So it was like a stretch limo, which is, you know, you just really don't ride it anymore. And I was like, that's a hell of a shot. I came out of the back window, 120 inches up to the front, hit the guy square in the fucking chest. I should get a medal for that. Assault. Well, that's kind of a man. Might be a plus in here. Assault with a burrito is probably the first time we've had that in here in your little podcast room. I definitely think it's the first time. It seems like you just be able to say, hey, I just threw it to you because I was drunk. I thought you were hungry. It's really what it was. I mean, you can hear me on the video going, hey, you want a burrito? And it was pretty ridiculous. The guy got a man card yank for sure. Yeah. What someone calls assault. Like, how dare you? Some people get beat into a pulp and you're calling a Taco Bell burrito flying your way. That thing costs a dollar ninety nine, dude. And it's barely meat. We were going over like how much of like there's a ruling on how much meat it actually has to be. We can call it a beef burrito, but there's fillers in that shit. Like, what is the filler? It was like silicone or something like that. But it's something ridiculous. Like thirty four percent of it is not actually meat. That's why I mean, that was 10 years ago. Yeah. I just don't know. It's probably 80 percent for the Internet. Yeah, they just think it pretend it's meat. Well, the cool thing Taco Bell now starting to open all their ones up with bars inside there. What? Yeah. Well, that's good for business. You know, get people more drunk so they don't care where the food tastes. Exactly. Get them all tanked up, feed them some burritos and send them on their way.