Joe Rogan on His Favorite Batman

Didn't like the earlier ones. He's older. He's older or Wolverine. Which is weird. Because if his body can recuperate from anything, why the fuck's the aging? Exactly. Why is he aging like that? Stanley, come on. Where he's losing some of his muscle, but he's still throwing people through the air like they're racking about. He gets shot and recovers right away, but his fucking joints hurt. His arthritis. Is that what's happening? Did he have arthritis? No. Really? No, he moves like it these days. I don't know if he officially does. I'm just saying, it doesn't make sense. How about they come out with another fucking Spider-Man? Oh, thank God. They need a new Spider-Man. They never want to pay Peter Parker. Dude! When Peter Parker starts getting big, they go, yeah, well, guess what? We're going to reboot it. They just keep rebooting it. They keep telling the same story over and over again with subtle differences. My Spider-Man's Tobey Maguire, you fuck. You fuck. Anyone else, kick rocks. I tell you what, though. The only time that that's worked, though? The Hulk. Yeah, they've done it a bunch. They started off with that Australian dude from Chopper. What's his name? Eric Bana. Eric Bana. He was number one. Wasn't thrilled about him as the Hulk. Not his fault. It wasn't his fault. It wasn't the best Hulk. And then Ed Norton, pretty good as a Hulk. Fan of Ed Norton. I was like, okay, I can buy this. But then Mark Ruffalo, best Hulk. Best Hulk. I believe him. I believe he's really a scientist. Me too. I believe he really understands genetics, you know? Yeah, you gotta do that. Christian Bale's the best Batman. You're talking about real actors. I agree. Sorry, Ben Affleck. I agree. How about Michael Keaton as Batman? Who the fuck was a good guy? How about this? George Clooney as Batman too. He's a fucking Mr. Steel, your girl. I bought George Clooney. I didn't buy it for a second. Oh, when Jim Carrey was the Riddler and then Tommy Lee Jones was Two-Face. Those are the best Batmans. When they were like, oh, we need to make this more real. I'm like, fuck you. I liked Arnold Schwarzenegger as Mr. Freeze. Wait a minute. Who was the Riddler? Jim Carrey was the Riddler. And who was Batman? George Clooney. No, Batman returns, bro. Wow. But Christian Bale's Batman forever. Christian Bale's Batman forever, sorry. Christian Bale's a better Batman. It's too real. Do you know Christian Bale was Batman only like six months after he was the machinist? That's insane. Yeah. Really insane. He was down to like almost nothing. He was dying. He was eating like a can of tuna and an apple a day. That's insane. You know how kind of willpower you have to have to let your body literally rot away to the skinny thing for a movie? Just for a movie. You don't have anorexia. You don't have a disease. You don't have a craft of acting to do that. Yeah, man. Yeah. Everybody trying to be the Joker these days though. That's like the big one. Tony Hinchcliffe. He's trying. He wants to be. Excuse me, Tony. Take a hike. Tony wants to be the Joker. Yeah. So look, he went from that to that. 121 to 195. That's all natural. That's insane. There was another movie in between, I think. Oh, there was? Yeah. The Equilibrium. There's another picture here. Dude, you're telling that's not photoshopped at all on the left? No. No. That's what he really looked like. That is so unhealthy. That takes years off your life. I mean, you're putting unbelievable stress on your organs. He's such an actor. He's a beast. He's English. You know that? I thought he was Australian. Is he? I think he's English. Is he? I think so. I thought they're all Australian. They're Australian. They'll throw you for a loop. Jackman's Australian. Like Chris Hemsworth. Jackman, like as an actor, like Christian Bale. Watch your words. He does some stuff. Wolverine? Look, I'm a fan. Don't get me wrong. But Christian Bale does some stuff like an American Psycho. Okay. That's another one. Dude, he was in the fighter. What? When he played Mickey Ward's brother. Oh my God. Dude. He's up and down the whole time. 185, 121, 190, 135, 190, 145. Him in rain of fire. He is bodied the fuck up. Yeah. So he got down skinny again to play Mickey Ward's brother. A meth addict, yeah. Yeah. He got Mickey Ward's brother, but his brother fought Sugar Ray Leonard. Yeah. This was in between two. Rescue Don and all that. I never saw that one. Dude, he's such a beast. That fucking, that dragon movie was dope for one of them silly, dumb movies. Which dragon movie? He was in a dragon movie. What was the dragon movie he was in? Wasn't he in a dragon movie with Matthew McConaughey? It was in the future. What? Yeah. Everybody had to live underground. Did you do all the drugs? I did them all. They had to live. That was it. Rain of fire. Oh, rain of fire. Yeah. That's what rain of fire is. Oh, damn. There's a dragon movie. Yeah. Matthew McConaughey's jacked in that movie. Oh, man. Super jacked. See, he got super skinny for Dallas Buyers Club when he had AIDS. Yeah, he did it too. He's another one. Yes. See if you get a picture of Matthew McConaughey jacked. Dude, I heard rumors about Tom Hardy. Shirtless. Matthew McConaughey's shirtless rain of fire. See, right there, that picture, he's got a vest on. Look how jacked he looks. Damn. Yeah, he was jacked for this movie. You never heard of that movie. Not Matthew. It's a... It's a dumb movie. Is it bad? Yeah. It's just dumb. It's entertaining. It's silly, you know, that these dragons fuck everybody up and, you know... Dude, remember how bad I used to hate on dragons until I watched Game of Thrones? I would clown on all you guys for watching dragons. I watched Game of Thrones. That dragon burns... Spoiler, you fuck. It's been out for nine years. He burns that fucking frozen wall. I'm talking about standing ovation. I was in the middle of my living room, slow clapping. Those dragons are fucking scary. When the one turns into a fucking white walker. Yeah. Ooh. Make it very hard. It ends in his eye, just goes... And it's a white walker eye. Everybody who works on that show, listen to me. Don't ever cancel it. Just keep going. Just you're never gonna do anything better than that. It's the greatest show of all time. I know. I don't know what you're thinking. Just write some new episodes, figure out some new shit. It's the greatest show of all time. They just rap. No! They rap. No, they'll be back. God damn, look at that, Mr. J. Damn. Matthew McConaughey jacked. Jack. I feel like for me to get that skinny and thin, I would have to go on some... I'd have to get some role like Dallas Myers Club and pretend that means... Look at that one right above that. Right above that, right above your cursor. Right there. Right there. Oh, who's that? That's Bradley Cooper. Bradley Cooper, body dubbed him son. Look at him. But wouldn't you do all the steroids to play these roles? I think they call me to be Batman. I'm like, yeah, yeah, all right, let me go down to the Gold's Gym, see what I can do. Yeah, you would have to. You would have to. You'd have to go on the carnivore diet, drop your body fat down. Why wouldn't you though? Yeah, intermittent fasting. Yeah, just the whole cryo every day. Yes. You'd be training camp. Get shredded. Be training camp. You'd want to have that scene where you're putting on your fucking outfit and you're just talking to me. Oh, I'd be like, we need more scenes where I'm shirtless. Down, down, down, down, down. Oh, Ryan Reynolds. Is that Ryan Reynolds? That's Blade. That's Blade 3. That's Ryan Reynolds in Blade 3. But who's that guy? Not this, this is just another guy. Oh no. That's next level. See, that's what you got to try for. No one ever tries for that. Dude, chicks don't dig that though. Other dudes dig that. Other dudes, we dig that. You ask girls, they're like, no, I don't like fucking. They say that because they're trying to make you feel better. Oh my God. I think it's so gross. I like guys that are soft like you. I like to grab your back and feel all fat. Look at Ryan Reynolds with his fucking A-pack. Disgust out. Oh my God. Get it away. I mean, I definitely don't want his dick in my mouth. Eat up, babe. Eat up. To feel a little belly fat on my nose. Get a full rack of ribs. Now fuck in the shake. Watch it down the shake. Yeah, I like a man who just relax like me and doesn't want to do much.